As promised, here's The Perils of Captain Hook Parts 1-3 (Patreon)

And this goes a little in advance of what the public can see on CHYOA.  Not too much "action" yet, but I have some ideas that might really please one Amy Schumer fan I know is here.

The Perils of Captain Hook:

Jaqueline Hook stretched and squinted in the sunlight as she stepped out of her cabin onto the deck. Conditions were calm, but her heart was heavy. She barely noticed her crew going about their business around her as she was lost in thought.

She’d been told a concerning story about the Crew of the TallyHo, a perpetual thorn her side captained by Patricia Pan. TallyHo was crewed by a gang called the “Lost Girls,” brought from the Other Realm to Neverland as children, where the magic of the realm had frozen their development for what might have passed as decades in the Other Realm.

Word was that the TallyHohad passed through a strange stormcloud last week. While the crew entered the cloud as children (however many years they had stayed in Neverland, and regardless of their real age in the Other Realm), they emerged over a decade older, as adults in their late teens and early twenties. What if this cloud wasn’t a singular occurrence? With her pirate crew averaging in their thirties, what would happen if the Jolly Roger encountered such a cloud?

Jacqueline bit her lip nervously as she considered it. After being preserved at her current age for so long by the magic of Neverland, she didn’t want to turn a decade older or more in the space of a few minutes just because of some magic cloud. If such phenomena became common, how many storms would she encounter before she was decrepit, or dead?

What about the island tribes, or the lost girls themselves? How many storms like this could THEY weather? No, something had to be done, and it had to be done quickly. But where could she even start? She had no idea what might have caused the strange stormcloud. But she had a hunch.

Almost in answer, her attention was caught by a buzzing, coming from her right ear. Awakening from her internal monologue, she turned to see a tiny, winged woman in a green dress hovering near her.

“Tinkerbelle,” she said cautiously, trying to mask the disdain in her voice.

“Hooker!” the fairy taunted in response.

The captain’s hand instinctively fell to her cutlass hilt, but the fairy continued speaking.

“I have information that I think you’ll want to hear.”

Jacqueline dropped her hand to her side from her weapon hilt and nodded, “do tell, little one…”

Tinkerbelle winced at the reference to her size. “The Lost Girls underwent a strange transformation lately.”

“So I’ve heard…they got…older, and taller I hear. I already know this.”

Size again. Tinkerbelle grit her teeth for a moment. “But there’s something else. Pan has left the TallyHo again. She’s running a skeleton crew.”

“Where has she gone?”

“She didn’t tell me, but TallyHois ripe for the taking. That accursed Wendy and her sisters are on board with a tiny contingent. You could take the ship in a matter of minutes. I’d act quickly, before Pan returns.” This wasn’t the first time Tinkerbelle had spoken ill of Wendy out of jealousy for the attention that Pan had lavished on her. Nor the first time the fairy had sold her out.

Jacqueline again bit her lip as she considered this information. While tips from the fairy had been factually correct before, challenging Pan had never quite worked out to her benefit. In particular, this felt like a trap. Just what she wanted, just what she needed, was being offered to her on a silver platter: the chance to examine the crew who had passed through the strange storm, and interrogate Wendy, whose connection to the Other Realm she suspected might have contributed to the strange phenomenon.

After an awkward moment of silence as she thought, the captain responded. “Thank you. And what are you hoping to get from this, little informant?”

“I’m not little! Just capture that Wendybeast and keep her away from Pan. She finds her…distracting.”

“Distracting Pan from you, is that what you mean?”

“Shut up, you big cow!”

Now it was hook who was bristling about the size comments. “I can make sure Wendy and Pan aren’t reunited, if that’s what you’re asking.”

“Don’t bungle it this time. If it works, we’ll never have to talk like this again.”

“An agreeable outcome for us both,” the pirate said.

“Indeed!” said the fairy, as she buzzed off into the distance.

Jacqueline took a deep breath as she stepped forward to address her crew:

“All hands on deck! Prepare for action! We’re taking a prize!”

IS THE CREW EQUAL TO THE TASK?

"Muster on deck!" the Quartermaster responded, ringing the ship's bell. The crew knew her as "Catty," due to her favorite accoutrement, a Cat-O-Nine tails that she used to keep discipline. Pirates honestly didn't take well to such treatment--after all, this wasn't the navy. But Hook enjoyed the tight ship her quartermaster kept. Standing on the deck below Hook's position at the wheel and above the crew, she called the roll of Jolly Roger pirates.

"Boatswain Samantha Smee!" A heavyset woman in a blue and white blouse and red cap responded, "Reporting for duty, Catty. Um, Sir! I mean ma'am!" The quartermaster grimaced for a moment before continuing. "Gunner Aimless Amy!" "Aye-arrr!" shouted a blonde pirate, in what seemed to be a failed display of grit.

The quartermaster nodded. "Sawbones Sally!" "Ship's Surgeon Sawbones Sally, present and awaiting orders. Now don't ya get yourselves injured on this trip!" said a sassily-attired pirate with her hand on her hip.

"Sailing Master Selina!" "Sailing MISTRESS Selina, here." The quartermaster stared at her. "How many times do we have to go over this? 'Sailing Mistress' doesn't sound like a pirate, but another profession altogether!" "Aye, but there's no disgrace in that profession, either!" Selina responded to the laughter of the crew. Catty threw her hands up in exasperation, and called the next name.

"Carpenter Clarice Jensen!" "I'm here...present...what am I supposed to say again?" "Are you drunk again?" Catty growled, shaking her flogger threateningly. "Um...no?"

"Cabin Girl Ari" "Aaaaaarrrrri, heerrree, aye!" said the redhead with a sly smirk. Catty looked unamused, but there was little time to take exception.

"Powder Monkey Kira?" Sally spoke up, "She's below, in my care for a twisted ankle. When she's ready to report for duty, I'll let you know." Catty nodded, clearly annoyed that she wouldn't get to flog the girl for insubordination. "Cook Katy?"

"Here ma'am, keepin' the crew well-fed, as always!"

"That's the full complement, minus the powder monkey, Cap'n," Catty reported, turning toward Hook.

Jacqueline's apparent mood of contemplation ended suddenly. "Hoist the sails! We have a prize to take!

Will it be smooth sailing?

A VIST FROM AN OLD NEMESIS

The Jolly Rogerhad barely sailed a few hundred meters in unusually calm waters when the crew started to seem uneasy. A rhythmic sound was following them, getting closer. “Tik, tik, tik, tik…”

Rage flashed over Jaquelyn’s face, as her mind flashed back to prior encounters with the culprit. “I hate that Croc!” she groaned, then pulled out her cutlass and shouted, “You will not have my trousers today! Nor my underwear!”

“Yes!” Smee added, “And you will not leave toothmarks in the Captain’s backside!”

“Shut up, bosun!” the Captain snarled. “Gunners!”

Amy saluted and aimed the cannon.

“Is that clock ticking faster than before?” Selina asked. “Aye, and I’ve heard the Tik-Tok compels the young to perform stupid feats to music for the entertainment of their friends” Sally added. “I saw Ari dancing like she was obsessed last time the beast was near.”

“You don’t know me!” the Cabin girl whined, and ran off below decks.

“Target in range!” said Amy. “Fire!” the Captain ordered. A series of loud bangs rang out on the ship as the naval guns recoiled against the chains that held them in place. “Miss!” Cattie called out.

Nevertheless, the ticking sound became more and more faint. “That’s it! Run you vile crocodile! You’ll not have me today!” the Captain shouted, triumphantly. “Reload!” she commanded, more quietly, as an afterthought.

“TallyHo…ho!” Smee called, from the crow’s nest.

“Prepare for boarding!” Hook commanded.

ARE THE LOST GIRLS PREPARED FOR ATTACK?