Wild Dragon of Rome 47 (Patreon)

Once Astrid’s incredibly misguided yet entertaining attempt to make Lillian pay was complete, I put my pants back on before I sat down with my legs crossed, continuing my meditation. Astrid’s assistance had arrived just in time, removing the mana pressure I had been dealing with.

But, I expected that to be the only benefit. So, I was surprised when, merely after a minute of meditation, I was able to feel a connection with the scales. It was a weak, almost nonexistent connection, one that barely gave me an awareness of my scales and nothing more.

Still, it was an incredible benefit.

“What’s going on,” I muttered as I tried to resolve it … only for it to click me a moment later. All day, I was trying to replicate those foreign instincts by forcing myself to feel angry.

A mistake, I realized, but only after I realized the reason for my rapid improvement. It might be the easiest way to trigger the dragon heart, but it wasn’t the ideal way. I had lived my life doing my best not to be affected by anger. Even as I deliberately angered myself by thinking of my uncle, it had been a careful, controlled fire, and nothing more.

Nothing like that primal, restless anger that threatened to devour everything.

In comparison, I had reveled in my joy and pleasure while Astrid ‘helped’ me, letting my own enjoyment mix with those instincts. Of course, I still didn’t let those foreign instincts rule me fully, but I didn’t treat my own emotions as a danger that needed to be corralled and controlled.

“Back to the beginning,” I muttered even as I focused on the echo of the scales. Establishing a permanent connection with my vitae, however weak, meant that I was a qualified first-order mage.

If I were trying to build another elemental core, I would have focused on directing the spread-out vitae into one section before I started meditating, slowly imprinting my thoughts, and perceptions, and pondering on its very structure. That was how one controlled the very elements that created the world.

A process that took years for my elemental cores.

Astrid’s explanation told me that the vitae from the beasts needed to be treated differently. Instead of changing and transforming the vitae, a holy warrior needed to let the vitae impact and change them.

I wasn’t willing to do that. Surrendering to feelings like anger and destruction stood against everything I believed. Against everything I had been trained to embody as a Scipio — even a bastard one.

“Let’s try something more interesting,” I muttered as I focused on the vitae present in my arm, particularly the scales at the edge. However, this time, I wasn’t trying to reverse the transformation, which, ultimately, was a mere cosmetic change. No, I was forcibly pulling all the vitae from one of the scales.

The pain was worse than I imagined. Despite my best attempts, a pained gasp escaped my mouth, and something warm started to trail on my arm. I didn’t need to open my eyes to know that it was blood.

I forced that extracted vitae to form a small orb, one that would function as an elemental vitae. I even succeeded, but I could tell that it wouldn’t last long. Unlike elemental vitae, it refused to be trapped and imprisoned.

It roared, refusing my control.

My mana started to gather around it.

Then, a realization hit me, freezing my heartbeat while I sweated in fear. The vitae was alive in a way I didn’t expect. Not exactly intelligent, more like a rabid, thrashing beast, but intelligent nonetheless. And, I had just alerted it.

I was glad that Lillian was near. I could feel her presence even without opening my eyes. She was getting closer, no doubt alerted by the sudden bleeding. Hopefully, she would be able to help with her druid tricks. “Call Astrid as well!” I shouted.

As much as I wanted to keep my secrets from her, the situation was rapidly growing to be too dangerous.

While waiting for her, the rest of the vitae from my scales rushed to the temporary core I created. The scales on my arm decayed, and my blood drained faster. But, I didn’t care about it.

The roars of imaginary beasts threatened to deafen me and took all my attention. As those roars rose, so did my heartbeat, pumping more and more mana to my body, while the beast vitae devoured it, growing steadily.

I had a feeling that, if I let that go on, I would cease to be myself. A great, unimaginable disaster. And, I refused it. I ignored the pain and attacked the mana, taking as much mana as I could gather. And, I started imbuing with my thoughts.

It was a hasty, hurried affair. Normally, modifying vitae by adding concepts required a calm, careful approach, curating every little detail perfectly. Unfortunately, I didn’t need hours to properly visualize concepts and ideas. I just focused on everything I could feel, bundled it with a lifetime of training I had used to develop my elemental cores, and jammed it inside an ever-growing ball of beast vitae.

“What’s going on? I thought the vitae was properly cleansed,” Astrid shouted, alerting me to their arrival.

“I don’t know. Just try to help him,” Lillian called, then gasped in pain. The reason became clear when I felt something dripping to my back, right on top of my heart. Her blood was used as a medium for her druidic spell.

It was the same trick she had used when my breakthrough had gone out of control. Once again, it worked, and the crystal lodged in my heart calmed down, stopping its wild mana output. But, it wasn’t enough to cheer, because the liquid beast vitae was still radiating its fury as it tried to grow further and further.

And, as it roared, I could feel my damaged elemental cores trembling and cracking even further as if their presence was being rejected. I channeled some mana without mental conception, trying to keep them together.

Astrid hit my body with a spell of her own, one that made me want to sleep. Yet, it also dampened the roars of the vitae. “Focus on my arm,” I told Astrid as I presented her with my bloody arm.

“What’s going on,” she asked even as her spell invaded my body again, dampening the roars even more.

“It’s complicated,” Lillian said, trying to deflect her questions.

“Tell her,” I growled, which was all I was able to say before I turned my attention to the vitae. Without the endless mana from the dragon heart, its growth had been halted, but it was still strong enough to affect me.

The foreign instincts hit me hard, but this time, they weren’t half-formed impressions. They were as strong as my own emotions, maybe even stronger. But, that way, they felt even more alien. I clamped on my own emotions, refusing to be swept by them while I did my best to influence them with my own thoughts, diluting their wildness.

“You can’t be serious. It’s impossible!” Astrid gasped once Lillian finished telling the most critical details of my situation. “No one could survive with elemental vitae and immaculate essence at the same time.”

“Really, that’s the part you’re surprised. Not the fact that he has a dragon heart lodged in his body constantly generating mana?” Lillian gasped.

“Talk that later,” I growled. “For now, find a way to help me.”

Not the nicest way of asking for help. In my defense, not only I was being tortured by the beast's vitae, but also my thoughts were repeatedly being invaded. It wasn’t exactly pleasant.

“Alright,” Astrid gasped, panicked. “I have an idea, one that we use to cleanse the essence of the beasts once it’s extracted. It’s not something that should be used on anything living, but…”

“Do it,” I said, ignoring the risks. Even with my best attempts, I could feel that the beast vitae was losing control. I didn’t want to risk it anymore. “Lillian, be ready to heal me if it goes badly.”

“Point me where the essence is gathered,” she said. I put my finger on my bloody arm, pointing to the exact location of that beast's core. Her spell was different than her previous ones. Dark, with jagged edges. As it sank into my arm, it hurt even worse than I expected.

But, despite that, I smiled. I could feel the consciousness of the beast vitae shatter under the spell, losing its coherency. I opened my eyes, and saw that my arm was even more mangled and damaged, maybe badly enough to require an amputation.

Still, better than losing myself to a beastly essence. I bit my lips even as I stretched my mana to beast essence once more, trying to take control. I wanted to take over before ejecting it. But, I was barely able to establish a rudimentary control over it before everything proved too much.

And, I collapsed.