Incoming Hyperwave Intercept (Patreon)

From: Melnorme InfoRelay Prime Trade Network <noreply@besttradersever.nafs.mel>
To: <recipients undisclosed>
Date: 3-8-2163
Subj: Hyperwave Intercept 

Greetings, valued trade partner!

We of the Melnorme Ultra-Trade Value Complex are always striving to maximize engagement opportunities for InfoRelay Prime traders like yourselves. Our unparalleled information-gathering network uses vastly sophisticated and, dare we say, TERRIFYINGLY SECRET techniques to scour the cosmic aether for interesting data, and it has come upon a document which we think you will find VERY interesting.

While we would normally avoid trading such incomplete information, we understand Humans to enjoy mystery and intrigue. We have repaired the document to readability as best we can, and as you are an InfoRelay Prime trader in good standing, we are delivering it as-is with no guarantee of veracity.

We hope that these sentences fascinate you. Thank you for your continued willingness to engage with our services!

With sincerest wishes that you always meet your quarterly guidance,

Trade Master Burnt Umber
Melnorme Ultra-Trade Value Complex