Halloween TG Story - At the Mountains of Mad-Thicc (Patreon)

“Ahhh, fresh air, blue skies; you really picked the best day to go on this hike, Jeremy!” A tall, broad-shouldered teen carrying a large backpack smiled and surveyed the gorgeous weather. His friend, almost as tall but much lankier, did not seem to share the handsome fellow’s jovial mood. Instead, this Jeremy had a serious expression fixed to his face as he bent over his open backpack and fiddled with several components. “Will you stop lining your baseball cap with tinfoil and come on? We’re burning daylight here!”

“I need to be prepared for anything, Reese!” Jeremy closed his pack and stood up straight. “Besides, the Crossbones Killer won’t be out until nightfall.”

“Wait, you want to stay here the whole night? It’s Halloween man! We’ve got parties to go to!” The implication of his friend’s response quickly dawned on Reese. What he thought was a fun day hike with his oldest pal, was actually another one of Jeremy’s pointless monster hunts.

“Okay, first of all, you have parties to go to. Second, Halloween is the only time the Killer comes out, so blame him! And third, I’ve explained this all to you before we left!”

“Well I may not have been paying atten-”

“And I explained it again in the car ride over here!”

Reese scratched the back of his head as he tried to think of an excuse for them to head back home. Jeremy was way too into this urban myth crap and, try as he might, Reese had never been able to bring his best bud back to reality for very long. Halloween was when this obsession got the worst, so the quarterback was hoping that dragging Jeremy to a few parties and getting a few more drinks in him would help the poor guy realize what he’d been missing. Letting out a long sigh, he finally conceded and the two started up the mountain.

***

“So, what’s the deal with this Crossbones Killer? He sounds pretty spooky.” Reese decided to try and start up a conversation after almost half an hour of walking in silence.

“Not much,” Jeremy replied, “That’s what the tin foil is for. And why we visited Madam Lestrade’s shop on the drive up here. You need to cover all your bases when fighting the supernatural.”

“Dude, come on. That ‘Mystic Mausoleum’ or whatever was just a scam! Do you really think that if we run into some boney monster out here that some scrolls and a goofy medallion is going to stop it from just biting your head off?”

“It was an emporium, not a mausoleum. And I know you thought it was a scam, you said so quite loudly when we were standing right in front of the owner!” Jeremy was clearly quite cross with his friend’s lack of decorum, but any place that sold newt eyes and monkey paws was definitely just a ploy to part the superstitious from their money. Hell, he was pretty sure he had seen bottles of literal snake oil on one of the shelves.

“Well the owner couldn’t have been bothered that much, seeing as how she gave me this doodad free of charge.” Reese smirked as he held up a small, golden, symbol of Venus with pointed tips. Madame Lestrade, a tall woman with long dark hair and a black dress which revealed much of her ample bosom, had promised that her little gift would make a believer out of him, but the skeptical jock just figured he could tie a string around it and use it as a Mother’s Day present.

Jeremy sighed and continued hiking. Realizing his attempt at conversation had backfired, Reese quickly pocketed the symbol when he felt a stinging sensation in his hand. Pulling it back out of his pocket, the handsome blonde realized that he must have poked himself on one of the trinket’s sharp points. He didn’t seem to be bleeding however, so the young man decided to forget it and get back to Jeremy.

As the trek continued on, Reese found himself continually getting distracted by staring at Jeremy’s physique. At first, he told himself that he had no choice, that he needed to keep his eyes on the trail and if Jeremy was walking the trail in front of him, so be it. After a couple minutes however, the womanizing quarterback had to admit that he was definitely paying more attention to his friend’s ass than the trail.

Alright, he thought, there’s nothing wrong with admiring a bro’s bod, right? As Jeremy’s friend, I can look at the guy’s ass and think that he needs to incorporate more squats into his exercise routing! It’s just workout stuff, not gay at all! Reese’s mental gymnastics were interrupted as long blond locks kept falling in front of his eyes, obscuring his view. Tying his long hair back in a ponytail with one of several hairbands wrapped around his wrist, Reese’s focus returned to his traveling companion.

“So, Jerry, what’s this Crosshair Killer dude’s deal? He some sort of pirate and junk?” This time, Reese was asking questions to try and get his mind off of how heavy his backpack had become. Why oh why did a tiny guy like him pack so much? He was going to get all sweaty now, and Jerry would think he was totally gross! Reese looked down at his outfit, a pair of hiking shorts and a cute tank top that showed off his chest, which was starting to look a little swollen. He really should have asked to walk in front. Staring at Jerry’s tush was fun, but he’d put a lot of work into this ensemble for absolutely no appreciation!

“Well first of all, you got both our names wrong. You know I hate being called Jerry, and the fact that you called him a pirate means you know he’s the Crossbones Killer. Secondly, he’s not a pirate, he gets his name from the skull mask that covers his face, as well as the horrific weapon he carries at all time…” As Jeremy began to describe the killer, his voice became gravelly and he stopped moving forward. Reese suddenly began to feel nervous. Sure, all this stuff was hogwash, but that didn’t stop goosebumps from forming along the student athlete’s thin arms and shaved legs.

“That gruesome weapon… that bloody tool of destruction… is a giant, jagged bone saw, made from his unsuspecting victims’ mutilated corpses!” Jeremy swung around to face his buddy, the exaggerated expression on his face illuminated by the flashlight he was holding underneath it. However, the moment he finished his sentence, the expression changed to one of pure bewilderment.

“…R-Reese?”

***

Jeremy was completely baffled by the presence of the unknown woman before him. Sure, she was really hot, and sure, there was something oddly familiar about her, but he distinctly remembered taking this hike with his childhood friend, not some busty blonde bombshell he’d never met before!

“Reese? Oh, I get it. I messed up your spooky murder maniac’s name, so you mess up mine. Hilarious dude, great to see you’re finally growing a sense of humor.” The gorgeous girl crossed her arms and rolled her eyes. It was the exact same pose Reese always struck when they argued, although when Reese did it, it never pushed up an impressive pair of breasts.

“F-fascinating…” the words slipped out of Jeremy’s mouth and the blonde, aware of where he was staring, turned away as her face became a bright red. Now he was almost positive this woman was somehow Reese, but there were still countless questions running through his head. This was by far the most impressive (well, only) display of paranormal activity he had seen to date, and its implications were unfathomable.

Pulling out his phone, the supernatural researcher’s next surprise was his home screen had been altered. Jeremy was still there, but instead of Reese, it was this woman smiling at the camera, giving him a noogie. Swiping the screen and pulling up his contact list revealed that her name was Rita, and the call log showed just as much one-sided activity as before the change, possibly even more.

“Dude, are you okay? I kinda wanna get to the camp site before dark, so we can pitch a tent. Eh, eh? …Bro, stop staring at your phone already.” Rita was beginning to look exasperated, so Jeremy slide the device in his pocket. He had already seen enough, the brief glance through his photo gallery had given him the information he needed to converse with Rita without making any egregious misunderstandings. All the pictures had been left unchanged save for the minor detail of his friend’s sex and the sport she played.

Instead of the star quarterback, Rita was their high school’s head cheerleader, not that that stopped her from dragging Jeremy to every sporting event she participated in. Just like Reese, Rita apparently also brought her socially awkward bestie to as many parties as she could… which wasn’t many, but there were still more than a few photos of Jeremy looking out of his element in a corner with Rita smiling next to him. No matter what changed, they never stopped trying to get him out of his shell.

It wasn’t much longer before the duo arrived at the campsite and started setting up the tent. Once everything was in order, Rita started collecting kindling for a campfire while Jeremy began digging through all the surveillance equipment in his backpack. A process which took longer than usual for a couple reasons. First of all, the young man was still piecing together the puzzle of how he could still remember Reese when all signs pointed to a complete reality rewrite. Figuring out how Reese changed in the first place was simple enough, he pissed off a mistress of the mystic arts and the medallion she gave him was actually a tool of revenge.

The second reason Jeremy couldn’t focus was much less complicated but perhaps even more distracting. Rita kept walking past him and “dropping” a few pieces of wood before bending over to pick them up in an exaggerated fashion. This had happened nearly a dozen times now and every time without fail she would catch him staring and a smug grin would spread across her face. It was the exact same grin Reese had whenever he’d beat Jeremy in a race back when they were kids. The amateur investigator shook his head in an attempt to focus. There was no time to waste reminisce or ogling! A genuine phenomenon was unfolding right before his eyes!

It seemed the young man had shaken a bit too vigorously, as metal flakes from his hat’s lining were falling out and getting caught in his eyelashes. While he tried to rub them out, Jeremy suddenly had an epiphany. The tinfoil lining! That’s why he could remember the way things used to be! Now, if only there was someone around who would find this revelation fascinating instead of boring and nerdy. Jeremy’s mind drifted to his uncle Phineas, the man who first got him interested in the paranormal with stories of Chupacabra and Bigfoot.

Unfortunately, stories of the supernatural rarely had a happy ending, and his uncle was no exception. Thirteen years ago, on this very trail, Phineas went searching for proof of the Crossbones Killer… and never came back. With his motivation renewed and his mind a bit clearer, the paranormal fanatic was able to finish preparing the equipment and help Rita light the fire. Embarrassingly, that “help” meant failing to use a flint and striker for several minutes until it was snatched out of his hands by Rita, who was able to produce sparks and get the fire started after only a few tries.

Before long the sun was setting and the two teens were roasting marshmallows over the fire. Rita has been slowly inching her way towards Jeremy for a few minutes now, not that he had noticed, and now she gently laid her head on his shoulders. The young lad concluded that she must have been more tired from the hike than she had been putting on, and he was merely the closest thing around to lean on. After a long period of silence, however, Rita spoke up.

“Sooo~ fires are pretty romantic, huh? All the heat coming off, causing people to huddle together and escape the cold in each other’s arms…”

“I never really saw it that way, but you kind of have a point. Of course, we’ll have to put it out pretty soon.”

“Oh? D-do you mean we’ll have to find other ways to keep warm? Maybe share some body heat in the tent?” Rita’s ears perked up, and she seemed to be getting a bit nervous. The dip in confidence was weird to Jeremy, but he was sure she’d let him know if something was bothering her.

“Yeah, we need to get this light source extinguished in case it spooks off the Crossbones Killer. I brought some heavy blankets though, so we should be warm inside the tent without any trouble.” Jeremy smiled broadly. Reese always thought his best buddy was a bit too nerdy for his own good, but now Rita was sure to be impressed by his preparedness! Camping was pretty much a sport, right? There must have been some flaw in Jeremy’s logic, as Rita was not looking particularly pleased when she stood up and started kicking dirt onto the fire with a scowl on her face.

“Hey, we had a few more minutes left before we had to put that out!”

“What’s the point? This whole day has been a waste of a holiday. The sooner we get to sleep, the faster tomorrow will come. Then I can go home and forget this stupid trip. Maybe even forget that I was ever dumb enough to think… it doesn’t matter. Rita’s scowl had faded away, and now her expression was one of disappointment and embarrassment. Jeremy wasn’t sure what was wrong with her, but Rita was his friend and- holy shit what was that?

“R-rita…” Jeremy’s voice was scarcely louder than a whisper, but it conveyed a sense of urgency and fear that must have gotten through to the distraught girl. She hesitantly turned around and found herself staring at the giant, lumbering figure of the Crossbones Killer.

He had large, heavy boots and a pair of overalls with tears all over. His shirt was completely stained with what Jeremy naively hoped was mud, and a long bearskin cape hung off the Killer’s shoulders. His face was hidden behind a mask resembling a human skull with a single-filter gas mask built into the nose and mouth. His eyes were pitch black with red irises staring straight at Rita. In one hand he held a large bone saw with jagged edges, clearly made of some material other than metal. His other hand was curled into a fist and slowly being raised.

Jeremy moved without thinking, charging in between his lifelong friend and the oversized freak about to attack her. The punch landed right in his gut and sent him flying backwards as all the wind escaped his lungs. Jeremy felt himself slam into Rita and the two of them were knocked onto the ground. The outmatched young man tried to fight back the pain and worried that despite him taking the punch, Rita might’ve been seriously injured anyway. Another thought swirled through his brain as he tried to figure out which way was up. If this was really the vicious, supernatural murderer from all the stories, how the hell were he and Rita going to get out of this alive?

Jeremy crawled back onto his feet and turned around to help Rita up, but she was already back up too. However, on the ground by her feet a silver glint caught the nervous nerd’s eye. That medallion Madame Lestrade gave them, the one that turned Reese into a girl! A half-baked plan formed in Jeremy’s head as he scooped up the metallic symbol of Venus and charged towards their oversized attacker. The desperate teenager could hear Rita scream out for him to stay back, but it was too late. He had gotten close enough for the Killer to get ahold of him, and was now being lifted into the air, a large hand wrapped around his throat.

The Crossbones Killer pulled his prey in close and lifted his nightmarish weapon, about to bring it down upon another victim, when Jeremy’s hand moved with adrenaline-fueled speed, plunging the sharp tip of the medallion into the Killer’s right eye. Screaming out in pain, the supernatural slaughterer dropped his quarry and stumbled backwards. Not taking this moment for granted, Rita ran to help her companion up, and the two hikers proceeded to dash away from their homicidal intruder.

“Th-that was crazy! Did you see the size of that freak?” after several minutes of running, the duo stopped for a moment to catch their breath and process the events that had just unfolded. Jeremy, who was in nearly as good shape as the head cheerleader, was still bent over and gasping for air.

“Yuh-yeah, it was- wheeze, it was incredible!”

“Incredible!? That psycho nearly killed us! He would have, if you hadn’t shanked him! Which, uh, I guess was kind of cool… not to mention when you rushed in to protect me… So um, thanks I guess.” Rita’s anger at her friend’s apparent obliviousness to the danger they were in started to fade as she recounted the daring feats which allowed them to escape and her face turned a few shades redder.

“You don’t have to thank me, Rita. It’s my fault you were in danger in the first place.” Rita’s first few words had actually gotten through to Jeremy, and he was starting to feel rather guilty. This was just supposed to be a fact-finding expedition, to get some evidence and finally convince others that this uncle wasn’t just some nut who got himself killed in a hiking accident while hunting the boogieman. The chances of running into the Killer were supposed to be miniscule, and even then, Reese could definitely take care of himself. Rita was another story, and now Jeremy had a responsibility to get her out of this hole he’d dug them both into.

Jeremy’s stream of thought was interrupted as the sound of shaking bushes alerted them to the return of their unwanted visitor. Before the duo turned to resume running, Jeremy noticed the Killer’s appearance had altered slightly. In addition to being visibly thinner, his boots seemed much smaller, and the skull mask was much more cracked than before. He must have gotten stuck on many branches while chasing them through the trees, as his bearskin was missing and both his shirt and overalls were ripped to shreds, exposing much of his calloused skin. As he sprinted away from the transforming terror, Jeremy just hoped that they would live long enough for the magic to finish its job.

Suddenly, Rita let out a yelp and fell. Before he could react, Jeremy tumbled downwards as well. When they were both back on their feet, the high school seniors looked around and realized they had fallen down an abandoned mine shaft and landed in an old mining cart. A loud sigh of relief escaped their lips and was abruptly cut short by the loud whine of rusty wheels turning. The cart moved forward, slowly at first, but accelerating rapidly until the duo was speeding through the underground track. After the initial panic faded, Jeremy looked around to see if the cart had a brake, but what he saw made stopping the last thing on his mind.

Racing behind them on another mine cart was the Crossbones Killer, bloodlust evident in his eyes. The supernatural psychopath’s transformation had progressed even further at this point. His figure had slimmed down dramatically, although his height and muscles were still intimidating. The Killer’s clothes were in shreds, hiding only his privates and the top of his chest, which seemed a bit swollen compared to the rest of his proportions. His boots looked more like sneakers at this point, and he seemed to be having some difficulty carrying his large saw. Finally, parts of the maniac’s skull mask had broken off, revealing small glimpses at the face underneath and allowing long strands of black hair to flow freely.

After a speeding chase through the mines, including a loop-de-loop which had no logical reason to be in a mine shaft, both carts came flying out of an exit built into the side of a cliff and fell twenty feet into the lake below. The next thing Jeremy knew, he was being dragged onto the shore by Rita, who must have pulled him out of the cart and swam to the edge of the lake with him in tow.

“Th-thanks Rita.” Jeremy groaned as he rolled off his back and onto his side.

“Oh! You’re conscious! I was uh, worried you might need CPR… Good thing you’re okay!” Rita smiled weakly as she looked away from her friend’s face.

Unable to see any sign that the Crossbones Killer was able to swim, the exhausted teens took a minute to catch their breath and wrench the water out of their clothes. After taking one last look to make sure their pursuer hadn’t surfaced, the duo turned to head towards the woods… and found themselves staring right at their haunted hunter, who had gotten off the cart before the exit and climbed down the cliff. But just as surprising as the Killer’s arrival was her new appearance.

She had an impressive physique, with thighs that could crush a watermelon and arms that would make the old Reese green with envy. Her boots were gone, replaced with a pair of black high heels. Her shredded clothes had transformed into equally revealing black lingerie. The silk bra squeezed her large breasts together to show off some incredible cleavage, and the frilly panties drew all eyes to the inviting space between her legs. Healthy legs, which matching stockings clung tight too. The color was faded and the fabric was worn out, but was still well-maintained when one considers that she lived in the forest and had one pair of clothes.

The skull mask had completely shattered, aside from the gas mask. The design had changed however, and it now carried two filters and sported sharp fangs where her mouth would be. Without the confining cranial covering, straight, jet black hair flowed down to her knees, contrasting her pale grey skin. Even with the gas mask covering much of her face, it was clear that the woman beneath was beautiful. Her eyes, however, had not lost an ounce of venom. Two pitch-black sclera, each holding a vibrant ruby that burned with hatred, stared daggers at the Killer’s next two victims.

Slowly, steadily, the Amazonian executioner raised her bone saw into the air with both hands, when suddenly her eyes twitched and her weapon fell to the side. Jeremy and Rita watched in confusion as their stalker grabbed her head in pain and began writhing about. First the sensation appeared to be painful, but as she collapsed to the ground her body language took a turn for the sensual, arching her back and massaging her recently acquired assets. Jeremy looked down to where the saw had been dropped, seeing only a black whip in its place.

Rita grabbed Jeremy’s hand and started running for the trees, taking advantage of whatever miracle had saved them from the clutches of the Crossbones Killer. Utterly drained of energy after all the night’s ordeals, it wasn’t long before the two were just dragging their feet, trying not to fall over. It was then that Jeremy felt a buzzing in his pocket. Pulling out his phone, which had a waterproof case, the young man found himself staring at a call from… his uncle Phineas?! Jeremy answered the phone as fast as his shaking hands would let him.

“Hey Jerry, how’s your expedition coming along? I’m driving by the area on my way home from a sasquatch hunt and thought I’d make sure everything’s alright.” It was his uncle alright, there was no denying it. Jeremy held back tears of joy as he spoke.

“A-actually, things have kind of… totally gotten out of hand. We really need a ride home…” After a brief conversation about where to pick them up, Jeremy ended the call with his uncle and headed to the rendezvous… nearly getting lost several times and needing Rita to remind him which path to take. Before long the duo was able to meet up with Uncle Phineas in his busted up old car, and they wasted no time climbing into the back seats and telling him to drive.

“So kids, did you catch a glimpse of these mountains’ resident cryptid?” Jeremy and Rita were still trying to process the night’s events, so it fell on their chauffeur to initiate the conversation.

“You could say that. The psycho bitch chased us around all night with a freaking whip! I knew you said she attacked campers, Jer-Bear, but you didn’t mention she was a half-naked pervert!” Rita folded her arms at the unpleasant memory.

“That might be my bad, Rita.” Phineas defended his nephew, “When I told him the story of my close encounter with the Sultry Slasher thirteen years ago, I left out some of the more… adult details. You see, she’s only known for targeting a certain type of camper. And despite her aggressive nature it’s not their lives that she takes…” An awkward silence filled the car as the younger occupants wrapped their heads around the fact that the supernatural freak they had just spent the evening running in terror from was actually after Jeremy’s virginity.

After a few hours of silence and occasional small talk, the car pulled up to Rita’s house, and Jeremy walked her to the door. The two teens stood around awkwardly, each waiting for the other to speak up first. For Jeremy this was standard practice, but he found it pretty strange behavior for Rita, based off his recent experiences with her and his long history with Reese. Still, that sense of responsibility from earlier came welling up inside him, and Jeremy found himself making the first move.

“Thanks for coming along with me on the trip. I know you don’t really care about this paranormal hobby of mine, so it really meant a lot. Not to mention, I totally would have been screwed without you there. Uh, wait, when I say ‘screwed’ I didn’t mean like-”

“It’s okay, dude. I know what you meant,” Rita smiled. “And hey, you were pretty brave yourself out there. I’m glad I came on this trip if it meant seeing that side of you…” The two teens stared into each other’s eyes. Rita began to close hers as she leaned forward and-

“Well goodnight! I know I’ll sleep like a log after all that running, hah! See you in school on Monday!” Jeremy smiled and waved as he walked back to his uncle’s car, leaving Rita alone on the porch with a baffled look on her face.

A short drive later and Jeremy was back home. The young man waved goodbye to his uncle, promising to hang out soon and trying hard not to get too emotional from the one-sided reunion. He creeped up the stairs quietly, trying not to wake his parents. Although he told Rita falling asleep would be easy, Jeremy knew there wasn’t a chance of that. He’d experienced two timeline shifts and been chased by a real-life cryptid! This level of paranormal activity exceeded anything he’d ever read about, and he’d lived it!

Then, a creaking sound came from the closet door behind Jeremy. Time seemed to slow to a crawl, and goosebumps formed along the high school senior’s skin. Slowly, he turned around to look at the closet door. Closed, just like he left it before the trip… right? Shaking with fear, he raised his hand up to the door knob… closer… and closer- the door swung open, and the Sultry Slasher emerged from her hiding space. Hunger was in her eyes, just as primal as the bloodlust that consumed her old self, but these craving were of a different variety. She pushed her prey back onto the bed with one finger and came crawling on top of him. Jeremy was right about one thing; he wouldn’t be getting any sleep that night.

The end