life/content update <3 (Patreon)

hey loves! i'm so sorry i haven't posted in a bit, i have not been home the last few days & only have access to my laptop right now. i have all of my newer sims on my pc so sadly i cannot access them to post for you guys until i get back home, but i should be back home hopefully tomorrow. i just have been dealing with so much lately, which i would like to be transparent about it because i've been feeling really alone lately & holding a lot in. i also feel like i don't share much about myself & would like to start doing so, because i am just an everyday normal person who deals with the same issues as anyone else. so at the start of this month, i got a phone call from my dad that my grandpa had passed away... i was never super close with my grandpa but he was my last living grandparent alive as my parents had children later in life. i started posting content & created my patreon around the time that both my grandmas passed away. i was very close with my grandmas & it took a huge toll on me to the point where i felt like i needed somewhere to express myself. i thought i have really been improving with my mental health lately until i heard about my grandpa & just felt all the creativity leave my body. i have never been good at dealing with death, especially with family members. i kind of just bottle everything up inside until i break. also i live in america & hearing the news today of the tiktok ban is really bringing me down. tiktok is where i started out & is my favorite platform, i can't imagine creating content without tiktok. i have managed to create a following of over 60k on there & absolutely love everyone on there. if i am not able to access tiktok, i will still be posting content to my youtube, instagram, & on here as well. i will not give up on my dream & let my depression win. i appreciate you all so much, whether you just follow me on tiktok/youtube or support me on here. i have been too depressed to work since i quit my job last year & patreon has really helped me be able to afford life the best i can. i don't make any money from youtube or instagram & i barely make anything from tiktok, so patreon has made a big impact for me. i love you all so much & hope this clears up why i haven't been posting as much lately. i don't expect any sympathy but appreciate any love & support i receive. xoxo <3