Chapter 75 : Family time (Patreon)

Of course, the first activity the ratlings had come up with to bond with James was the age-old classic Captain Cyan watching. With their increased sizes the ratlings had a harder time all piling up in front of the screen of the phone they watched it on, and even now David and Blanche were absentmindedly trying to kick the other off Goliath's back as they watched the show. James now had a good idea of what to buy for their birthday.

"Captain Cyan! Red Revenant has teamed up with Violet Violence and Orange Revenge, and they're going to blow up the Denim Dam!"

"Curses! Green Girl, Blue Boy, get ready! With so many powerful foes, I worry this may be our toughest battle yet."

"Of course mister Cyan!"

"We're going to kick their butts, Captain!"

"Don't be overconfident, Green Girl! You two have greatly improved, but never underestimate your opponents!"

"Don't worry, Captain. I learned from the best!"

"Their 'toughest battle yet'? Didn't Cyan fight against Prometheus, a Titan, as he was trying to reshape reality? Are a bunch of colored guys really worse than that?"

"Dad, it's different. It's like... Like..."

"Prometheus was a powerful foe, father, but he wasn't a fighter. He was clumsy, and when he ultimately lost he admitted defeat. Revenant? That man is a killer, a maniac. Cyan doesn't have time to breathe. A single mistake and Revenant will tear him apart. The other two are just distractions for Revenant to enact his scheme."

"Couldn't he breathe while Revenant is monologuing though?"

"Yeah, gotta go with the old man on this one. Cyan should just grow a backbone already and put an end to Revenant permanently. Like, the dude just keeps coming back and breaking stuff, no jail can hold him, at one point just kill him and get it over with!"

"But Captain Cyan is a good guy!"

"Oh come on Goliath, killing things doesn't make you evil. The old man just came back from killing stuff and I don't see you throwing a tantrum over it, so why can't Cyan do it?"

"I think what our darling brother tried to say, David, is that Captain Cyan is a Hero. He has to uphold standards the rest of us don't, including our beloved papa. Though I do agree our dear Captain is a bit too lenient on his nemesis."

"You said it yourself, Blanche. There are rules Cyan must follow, although they're not the most efficient ones. I respect his choice to uphold these rules, even if they get in the way."

"Oh of course miss 'duty and hard work' would agree with the no-fun part."

"Pardon me, did someone say something? I'm afraid I can't listen to the opinion of psychopaths."

As the ratlings looked ready to go into an all-out brawl, Trixie the little ghost girl just turned to James and cheerfully spoke up.

"Funny!"

"Yes, their banter is nice. AS LONG AS THEY PLAY NICE TOO, OTHERWISE, THEY WON'T GET TO WATCH CAPTAIN CYAN FOR A WEEK."

"Dad!"

"Father!"

"Papa!"

"Daddy!"

"Old man, you can't do this to me!"

"I'm not asking for much, am I? Just be nice to each other. What would Captain Cyan, uh?"

"Oh yeah? Well, who's going to stop us? Polisson?"

"I'll just be taking the phone."

"You wouldn't dare!"

"Are you willing to take the risk, David?"

"What if someone attacked us while you were gone? How could we contact you?"

"Oh, David, I plan to stay here for a little while. And once I'll leave, you'll be coming with me. There won't be any need for you to have a phone."

"I will remember this, old man."

"Wait, dad, did you say we'd be coming with you?"

"Yes. I finally secured what should be a way out of the slums, and once we're done with the preparations we'll be able to all go live on the surface, in the real Zalcien."

"The... Surface? With the sun, the grass, the trees, the people, and everything?"

"The nice shops with nice clothes?"

"With a school?"

"With all the laws about not killing stuff?'

"Father, weren't you worried the surface would be dangerous for us? What made you change your mind?"

"The slums are a dangerous place, a proper civilized would be much safer. Getting ourselves some official documents will be complicated, but I have a few friends I could ask for help."

"What then?"

"I don't know. I haven't been there yet. I think I'll try to find us a nice abandoned building or apartment, I'll infuse it until it's usable, and then we'll figure it out from there. I'd love to send you all to school so that you may have a proper education and know more about the world we live in."

"Oh! Will we have pets? Regular families have pets up there, right?"

"Not everyone has pets, Goliath. But I'll think about it. Finding a place for us will be hard enough, but taking care of a pet might be a little too much. Plus I'm pretty sure there might be stricter rules of animal ownership than I'm used to in a place where virtually anything can suddenly become overpowered."

"Oh..."

"That's not a no! Just a hard maybe."

"Yeah!"

"Father, with the way your professional life is shaping up to be... Will we be allowed to take the Hero Union's tests?"

"Kids, I want you to do what makes you happy, don't worry about me. If you want to become Heroes, that's fine with me! I'd be incredibly proud of you, just like I'd be proud of you if you wanted to open a restaurant. As long as you are proud of yourselves, it's all that matters."

"Dad..."

"That said you will not be partaking in any sort of test before you are fully grown and have gone to school, as well as some home training. If you want to fight people for a living, you better be stronger than anyone else around."

"Eh, that's always been the plan, old man. Say, wanna fight?"

"Don't you want to finish this episode first?"

"Oh, that? We all already saw it, we just picked up where you left off. Why, are you scared I'm gonna beat you to a pulp?"

"David, I just came back from killing a demon."

"For real? What was it, an imp?"

"I know what you are trying to do, of course. It doesn't work on me. That said, more training is always good and since you are all usually so reluctant, I will make use of this opportunity."

"You serious?"

"Yes. Come, let's go to the gym. If any of you wishes to tag along-"

"Nope."

"Have fun dad!"

"I can't wait to see what happens once Captain Cyan meets Admiral Azure!"

"-I'd like for you to team up and fight against me, to show me what you've learned."

"Unfortunately father, unlike our more bestial brother, we prefer to use tools and weapons, and with our current growth, Goliath can't make new ones until we are done. It'd be a waste to use resources for weapons today that will be useless tomorrow, no?"

"Doesn't that sound like a horrible excuse, old man?"

"Yes, yes it does. Heroes must learn how to fight without their gadgets and powers, no? You should do the same."

"But dad-"

"That was an order. Everyone to the gym, now. Even you Trixie, I don't want you to wander off where I can't see you. Don't worry, you don't have to participate, you can keep the phone."

"Yeah!"

The ratlings grumbled as they followed James while Trixie merrily played a tile-matching game on the phone, almost dropping it when she tried to pass through a wall and it didn't follow.

The gym had been expanded since the last time James had spared with his furry children, but it was still perfectly reasonable compared to the sort of things he had in mind for the near future. Sydakors had created an arena much larger than what James was used to and had an easy time attacking from afar, and he wouldn't be surprised to learn that it could have easily evaded his attacks if it had truly cared to. Hell, even before that the primal goblin gang leader he encountered used its speed and the open terrain to attack James and deal with his tentacles. If he wanted to be ready for what could come next, he needed to see bigger. And so did the ratlings if they really wanted to devote their lives to fighting crime.

"So, since you're the ones who brought up that you can't use your old equipment, you will have to learn how to fight with nothing on you. All of you will have to work together as a team against me, as for me I won't be using magic, only shapeshifting and my natural shadow manipulation. Any questions?"

"Since you have no organs to hurt, can we use lethal attacks?"

"You just want to bite father."

"Never said I didn't."

"You know what? Yes, fight like you're trying to kill. Keep in mind your siblings are also there, so anything too destructive or wild puts them at risk. If any of you is hurt too badly we'll stop right away, so if you really want to fight to your heart's content..."

"...Don't scar the others to beat you, got it."

"Good. Anything else?"

"Nope."

"Negative."

"No."

"I know everything I need, father."

"It's fine for me too!"

"Great. Now, I'll give you one minute to plan what you're going to do."

"No peeking?"

"Or eavesdropping?"

"Or spying on us with shadows?"

"Nothing. I will be meditating in the corner. This is training for me too, after all."

At that James turned into a shadow and slithered to a corner of the ceiling where he transformed into an odd blob, from which after a few seconds began to emerge thin black spores.

"...Uh. Well, that was quick."

"That's dad for you."

"So, what's the plan everyone? David leaps to his face while the rest of us sneaks in from behind?"

"Hey, I may be a battle junkie but I'm not stupid. He'll just drop down or something. And did you forget he can see everywhere around him? He has no blindspot, Blanche."

"Well, what's your idea then, mister psychopath?"

"The old man knows how to fight, but he hasn't seen us in a while. We all have new tricks, and even without your fancy stuff you should be able to surprise him, no?"

"So you want us to just fight like normal and then catch him off-guard with new techniques? That's it?"

"Suprise attacks don't work, but surprise tactics should. I must admit that's a good idea, David. Simple, but effective."

"Of course it's good, it's mine."

"Isn't that what Captain Cyan did against the All-Seeing Dye?"

"Shut up Foudre."

"Uh, guys, I like the idea but..."

"Yes, go on Goliath."

"I just think we should be on the defensive?"

"Oh come on, that's always your plan!"

"But David, think about it! Daddy always catches the people he fights off-guard because he plays along with whatever they're doing. He's at his best when he's surprise attacking or countering an attack, but in an open fight, if he has to strike first..."

"...Then he won't have this advantage. If he attacks one of us the others are still ready to fight, and if he tries to catch us with his tentacles we can tear them apart. If we rush in blindly, we will be no better than that horde of cockroaches. Great idea, big brother."

"You're gonna make me blush..."

"I don't think we can blush, Goliath. You know, with the fur and all."

"But we'd be adorable~"

"Don't our ears get pinker when we're happy? Doesn't that count as blushing?'

"Oh please! Are you done talking cutesy stuff? Can we focus back on how to beat the old man?"

"Killjoy."

"So, we fight defensively, stick together, and try to use our new techniques to catch him off-guard whenever an occasion presents itself. Is that all? Does anyone have any other suggestion?"

"Without our weapons? Yeah, that's all I have. What about you guys?"

"If Papa hadn't dropped this onto us so soon we could have had some time to prepare some nice choreographies, but now there's nothing I can do."

"I already said what I wanted to."

"That's all from me too. The old man is a tough nut to crack, there ain't much we could do, even with our weapons."

Lucille listened to David's final remark before nodding.

"Alright, everyone."

She took a deep breath.

"Let's do this!"