Daily Sketches 4/29/18 (Patreon)

An excerpt from “Things I Have Had Sex With″ an ongoing memoir by Baphomet

Entry #38,294: Nurikabe, circa 1832 AD

"So here's the story of how I fucked a wall, and I don't mean any of the glory hole shit. 

Now let me tell you, Japan is chock full of weird monsters to fuck. You can find spirits occupying just about anything over there, it's like someone went around sticking googly eyes on everything they could get their hands on. Every time I head over there, I swear there's another few dozen yokai for me to dick down with.

So the Nurikabe, right, he's a wall yokai. Technically, he's actually a big, flattened dog-lookin' fucker, but it's one of those things where you have to be really paying attention to see what's really going on there. Otherwise, he's just a weird wall. So I see this wall just sitting right in the middle of the field I was walking through, seeming totally out of place, but every time I tried to walk around it, it just kept going, against all logic. I try flying over, and even though it only seemed 7 feet tall, I just can't seem to get to the top of the damn thing, I feel like I'm going crazy.

Well, now I'm tired and pissed off, so I tried getting myself off a couple of times, as I do in all situations, and I can't help but feel like someone's watching me. Not that that's a problem, because I mean, k-i-n-k-y, but you want to at least know who you're putting a show on for, right? So I'm knuckle-deep into round three before I realize, 'it's the fucking wall'. Of course it's the fucking wall. I sucked an umbrella's dick like, four hours earlier, why should I be surprised that Japan has horny walls? 

Legend says that the Nurikabe blocks the paths of travelers in order to disorient and lead them astray, but I'm pretty sure he kept moving that mug of his just so he could keep ogling my bomb-ass titties. I can appreciate that sort of attention, though. I did some "appreciating" all night, in fact.

XXXOXO

Baphomet

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Prompt was "Baphomet with a Nurikabe" requested by a $20 patron.