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We talk about regrettable tattoos, what makes a vacation enjoyable, and Mike reads some Malcom X.

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J.H.

You gotta go to the Wave Resort in Long Branch for "the next step up" at the Jersey Shore. Expensive, but worth it just for the pool and proximity to the beach.

Sam Schick

Nip it in the bud. Take your kid out on the town with that thing, have a great time, get ice cream and ride it till the batteries die. Then you douse it with lighter fluid and make him set it on fire and push it into the river. Tell him to stop crying and be a man, that the power wheels he’s crying over doesn’t mean shit to that rich fuck and that his tears are what he’s really trying to buy. You’re grabbing him by the shirt now and your telling him that the only thing you accept from rich fucks like that are what you take from them and you tell him to steal something from the house in the hamptons that you’ll throw in the same river. It’ll be a bonding moment but tell him it’s on him if he gets caught.