My Sons and I Got Isekai’d To The Losing Goblin Side: Chapter 009: Interrogation Time (Patreon)

Standing a few steps from the woman's tent I took a deep breath and slowly let it out. I felt like an idiot holding a bowl of deboned, cooked rabbit meat. I figured she would like something besides what they had been feeding her and knew I could not give her bones or she might use them for a weapon at some point. I wanted to pray that this might work but I had no clue who I would even pray to. Glancing around I noticed the guards looking toward me.

The guards were actually laughing at me. I figured they must have thought I was planning on having some fun in the tent. Perhaps they believed I was bribing her with food. Shaking my head I strode past them to the opening and pulled the flap back and went in.

I was surprised by the sight before me. Chained to two poles was our captive, buck naked. My eyes took in every bit of her flesh and I realized that she was watching me ogle her. Lowering my head I tried to smile and slowly walked towards her. I must look like an idiot to her. I took a small piece of the meat from the bowl and put it to my lips and ate it.

Setting it down on the ground I gently pushed it towards where she could reach it and then stood up while I looked around the room.

I could feel her eyes staring at me. Even though she was naked she did not appear to be embarrassed in the least. I was not sure if it was a show to prove her strength or if she was just that comfortable being naked around others. Perhaps she too thought I was going to try and bribe her with food so that I could have my way with her. Anime shows had ruined my ability to judge how women might react in this world. Seeing a blanket against the wall I went and retrieved it and held it out where she could see it.

She eyed me and said something but I did not understand.

I shook my head and said, “Blanket.”

She cocked her head and looked at me again.

I pointed to the blanket I was holding.

“Blaaaa nnn keeet”

“Blaannkeeet.”

I smiled and nodded. It was not perfect but for our first word together it was pretty good. I held it out to her and she nodded. I took a few steps and moved behind her and I draped it over her shoulders. Coming back around I realized she was still not eating.

“Food. Foooooood.” I said as I pointed at the meat in the bowl.

“Foouudd.”

I nodded and smiled and sat down across from her. I started to reach into the bowl again and muttered, "If only I had google translate.”

“Google?”

My head snapped up and I saw her face light up. Her eyes were wide and she was leaning back a little as she looked at me.

“Google? Apple? America? English?”

What the hell was that I thought to myself. I felt like a fricking fool! Out of all the words I could have said, why were those the four that seemed to pop out.

She smiled and motioned to herself.

“Japanese!”

Holy elf crap! Somehow in this entire world, had we actually managed to capture someone from our world? I was not the one who needed to be here. Turk could speak Japanese! Outside of a few words I picked up from anime, I was worthless.

She started spouting off words and I held up my hand and stopped her.

Pointing at myself I shook my head.

“American!”

She nodded and pointed to herself again and replied, "Japanese!" Her smile was even bigger now.

I stood up and motioned for her to stay put with my hands, again feeling like an idiot since she was chained to a pole, and went and leaned my head out of the tent.

“One of you get Turk and tell him to get here now! I need him!”

The guard on the right looked at me weirdly and shrugged. “Any idea where he would be?”

“Check our tent. He should be there.”

He nodded and ran off while I ducked back inside.

She was staring at me but had picked up the bowl and was nibbling on a piece of the meat. She held it up and looked at me.

“Usagi?”

I had no clue what that meant but I put my hands up on my head like big ears and bounced around the tent like a rabbit. Somehow I kept forgetting how much of a fool I must look like. What would the other goblins or Brar or Vreek do if they saw me acting like this?

She started to laugh and nodded. A real smile came over her face and she shook the piece of meat again and repeated the word once more before stuffing her mouth with it.

I found myself smiling too, all while I stood staring at this naked woman. My mind wandered as I stared and I realized she was beautiful by how we measured women back home. Adding the fact she was naked, smiling, and stuffing her face with food only seemed to add to her beauty. At that moment I felt a twinge in my heart. Even though my wife had been gone for over ten years it hurt to think like that about other women.

A few minutes had passed and the occasional arigato was given by her as she consumed all of the food I had brought. When the tent flap finally opened up and Turk came inside I saw his eyes go wide and he tried to look everywhere but the naked woman before him.

“You.. uh… called?”

I laughed and tapped the spot on the ground next to me.

“Get over here and stop acting weird. I know the kind of anime you have watched before so get over it. She is Japanese and I assume can speak Japanese so I need you to translate!”

Turk’s eyes seemed to glow and he smiled as he sat down next to me and did his best to keep his eyes on her face. I was lost as they both started talking quickly in Japanese. The woman’s face brightened up and she was smiling and waving her hands as far as the chains would let her as she talked. This moment made up for all those long drives I had to do when I took him to a tutor for two years. Not only had our family trip to Japan last year been amazing because he could speak Japanese, but now we had a way to talk with someone on the other side.

“Ohhh…” Turk suddenly moaned and the woman started laughing hard and grabbed her crotch and pulled up on it hard.

“What was that about?” I asked as I knew my eyes had gotten wider.

Turk broke eye contact with the woman and looked at me with an awkward glance.

“So yah… that is not really a woman but a Japanese dude who died twenty years ago.”

“WHAT?”

Glancing at the man, woman, or person before me I saw the laughter behind her smile.

“You're telling me that's a dude?” I confirmed.

“Yeah… and apparently we killed one of his girlfriends he made here…”

“Girlfriend?” I paused and thought for a moment. “You mean the one with the two swords?”

Turk nodded and sighed.

“He understands we didn’t know but he is a bit sad. He said it took him about a year to convince her to be with him, or with her or I mean I don’t know.”

It made sense. If I was a guy reborn in a woman's body, I would have played with myself a ton. After that who knows what I would have done. It fits perfectly into most Japanese isekai we had ever watched.

Rubbing my hand on my face and then my neck I found it much easier now to not look at him or her like that.

I groaned a little as I asked, “What is his name? Like his name here, not his name back in Japan.”

Turk looked at me and rolled his eyes.

“May.”

“May you what?”

“No May. Like the K-pop singer May in Japan.”

I glanced at May and saw her smiling and nodding. May huh? Part of me wanted to kill the guy now and end the pain I felt slowly growing in my head.

I took a deep breath and let it out. Remember what I wanted to do. We needed May. The world had dropped a gift in our laps and I needed to make sure we took advantage of it.

“Ok. Well, tell May that we will see what we can do about convincing the leader of the camp to free him. Also, let him know I cannot promise that some orcs and goblins will not come in here and try to take advantage of him. After that see what you can get him to tell you about this world and what he has learned. Tell him I will share what we know about this side.”

Turk nodded and turned back. Soon the two of them were chatting in super speed mode again. How I wished for subtitles. Nothing was worse than listening to people speak Japanese and not knowing what was being said. After about five minutes Turk turned and looked at me.

“Can you get him a drink of water? He says he is thirsty.”

“Five minutes and that is the first thing you tell me?”

“Please. This guy loves to talk. Just get the water and let us get this over. This dude is really making me feel dirty and I am a freaking goblin, living in filth.”

Chuckling, I stood up and went to the tent flap.

“I need some water. Go get me some.”

The guard on the right nodded and set off. Apparently, I had finally figured out that short and simple commands were best when one needed something.

Returning inside I turned stood at the entrance and watched the two of them talk.

Thirty minutes had passed and Turk eventually stood up and nodded at May. Turk motioned me towards the tent entrance and we both waved goodbye. May waved back wearing a huge smile as we left.

Once we got a little bit past the guards, Turk shook his head and made a look like he was going to gag on something.

“That was so bad. Like every weirdo dreams of something like this and turns it into some harem thing. Someone from here had to have come to our world and made sure to relay the dreams of men when they are in this world.”

Laughing I put my hand on his shoulder and gave him a small push.

“So I should not expect to see you with a harem then?"

Turk’s eyes lit up and he smiled.

“If I can make that happen I will apologize now. After all, you want a lot of baby goblin grandkids right?”

“I am not so sure after that encounter,” I joked. “So tell me what you learned.”

“Let’s get Dirk first. I want to only say it once if I can.”

It took Dirk about three minutes to finally settle down and stop laughing as Turk explained who the woman we captured was.

“Oh Dad, that makes me want to send Vreek in there. Just so I’ll know the truth and he won't.”

“I’m not sure Vreek would care, son," I replied. "A warm or cold hole might be all he really wants.”

Dirk nodded and sat down on the chest. "So tell us about our Japanese friend," he said with a smile.

Turk filled us in that May was the only hero besides one other in the main capital that he personally knew of. Ten years ago one had been found and her magic power and ability were so good that the human King bought her a first-class ticket to the capital. May had been content being the best out here and building his harem. Supposedly he had over twenty different women in town who all worshiped his ability as a hunter. The poison arrows had been one of the first things he had figured out. After that getting stronger was easy. He had been very surprised we had defeated his party until he learned we were from Earth as well.

“Will he teach you the language of this world though?” asked Dirk.

Turk shrugged and nodded.

“He says he will. Right now I think he is excited knowing there are some others in this world like him. It gives him someone to talk to about the struggles of this world versus our old one. He likes the fact that I know Japanese and the culture so we do have a bond.” Turk shuddered when he said that. “He mentioned that he grows in strength by the number of ears or heads he offers at the temple in a larger town. A goddess apparently blesses the hunters for those offerings. He has killed hundreds of us and offered them to her. According to him, he is somewhat of a legend in these parts.”

It sounded like what Vreek had said. He knew Xeld would die once he was shot by the poisoned arrow. How could we use May’s desire for power and women to help us though?

Rubbing my chin with my fingers I started trying to figure it out. I could not understand why my chin was itching so much lately. Suddenly the solution came to me.

“I got it!”

Jumping up I paced the inside of the tent for a moment going over my plan in my head.

“I know how we can get him to start giving up information. I just need to find someone willing to play the role that we need.”

Dirk and Turk were looking at me with that look of when was I going to spill the beans.

“We need a goblin or orc female to be used as a reward for his help.”

“That is disgusting!” exclaimed Turk.

Dirk nodded and then added, “Yes. That goblin will want to take a bath. No telling what she might get from that woman.”

Turk laughed and I found myself joining in.

“Think it will work?”

Turk nodded.

“Based on how he talks I think you are on the right path. Everything he does is about him getting more women and gaining fame. I think he will be glad to help for a bit. I am just not sure we could ever really turn him to our side. I think he would eventually betray us. Especially if he ever stops to consider how much of a blessing he might get for killing us.”

“That is a good point,” I admitted. I had not considered that yet.

I had not even considered how his heart might help us in our growth. If there was a chance to eat the heart of someone like ourselves who knows what kind of power that might give? Turk was right. If May had the chance and considered the same thing we did right now, then he might be planning on how to kill us.

“We need to get this ball rolling quickly," I stated. "I’ll talk to Brar. Turk, if you ate a heart and spent time trying to learn the language here do you think it would help?”

“Most definitely. The book that I have been studying was a lot easier to figure out when I was using my last heart. I think I will soon be able to cast a few spells.”

This was good. Now all we needed was to put our plan before Brar and see if he would go along.