The Big Oof! Volume 2 Chapter 43: Inquisitive Boarding. (Patreon)

Bennett was leaning over the bow, staring at the night sky that was painted with a myriad of twinkling stars. The cool and humid air gently caressed his face as he took in a deep breath, filling his lungs with the salty scent of the sea.

He could tell they were close to the sea.

“I think we’re here.” Bennett said, as the points of cobble stone towers started to come into view.

Elijah, who had been lost in his thoughts, looked up at Bennett's words. Following the engineer’s gaze, the sight of stone and wooden docks slowly came into focus. It felt like they were moving at a snail's pace, but the ship finally made its way closer to the port city, showing off a more surreal and magical splendor in a way that made Elijah's heart race with anticipation.

As the ship meandered through the gentle river, the port city of Aldenshor began to reveal a strange, yet enchanting beauty that caught both the Humans off guard. Towering above the city’s skyline were the majestic spires of the grand castle that Bennett saw before. The stonework looked as if it were intricately carved and looked as if they were burning in the night sky. Bennett knew of their strangle lighting technique from his time in the magic shop, but Elijah stood there with his mouth slightly ajar, wondering how the locals were sophisticated enough to create LED analogues and attach them to buildings.

Once near the docks, Rhea spun around and bellowed out to the ship’s crew, "Secure the lines and prepare for docking!" Her commanding voice cut through the crisp night air, causing the crew to jump into action with swift, well-practiced movements.

The sailors immediately rushed to their stations, expertly pulling and tying off ropes, causing the singular square sail to slowly roll up. Then, just below them, several oars extended from both sides of the ship's hull and began to row rhythmically in an effort to slow down. The creaking of the wooden hull and the flapping of the rolled-up sail filled the air, mixing with the distant sounds of the dock workers hustling to prepare for their arrival.

It was long until the ship came to a gentle halt, with the ship's crew tossing thick ropes to the waiting dock workers who quickly secured them to the large wooden posts, drawing the ship tightly against the pier. With a heavy splash, the ship's anchor was lowered into the murky depths below, ensuring its stability while docked.

Rhea turned to face Elijah, Bennett, and the rest of their small party with a smile on her face. “It seems we have arrived!” She said, putting her hands on her hips. “I must say, I didn’t think I’d enjoy my time on this infernal thing as much as I did. I’m very appreciative you allowed me to use your magical tool, it truly made the journey far less painful than normal.”

Seeing the good mood the Knight Captain was in, Elijah couldn't help but smile as well. “If you liked it that much, you’re free to come with us." He said nonchalantly.

Giving out an awkward chuckle, Rhea shook her head as her cheeks slightly flushed. "As tempting as the offer is, I still have duties I must attend to.” She said, brushing her hair to the side. “But thank you, nonetheless."

Elijah tilted his head at the reaction as his grin turned into a sly smirk. "You sure?" he asked in a teasing tone. "You should definitely come with us or else I’ll miss you."

Rhea's cheeks flushed a deeper shade of red, "Haha… Surely you jest.” She laughed nervously, unsure what to say next.

Forcing down the wicked smile trying to form on his face, Elijah decided to press his luck and see what would happen if he just applied a little more pressure. “Who wouldn’t enjoy the company of someone so beautiful?” He said, watching the woman’s face turn into a tomato. “I’d love it if you’d come with us- OOF!”

Shooting his elbow out, Bennett landed a rather vicious blow to Elijah’s stomach, effectively cutting him off. "Alright, that's enough," Bennett interjected, giving Elijah a pointed look. "I’m not going to just sit here and wait for you to finish whatever bullshit this is.” The engineer growled.

As Elijah stumbled forward, still trying to catch his breath, Rhea couldn't help but let out a small, relieved sigh. "Thank you, Sir Ben-nett," she said, her cheeks gradually returning to their normal color. "I appreciate your... intervention."

“Yep, don’t worry about it.” Bennett said, waving his hand half heartedly at the Knight Captain as Azeline grabbed Elijah’s arm and dragged him towards the boarding plank. “How long are you staying anyways?” He asked, giving Rhea a curious look.

Rhea considered the question for a moment before answering, "I'll be in Aldenshor for a couple of days. We still have to restock on supplies before sailing out for the Holy Dominion. Plus, I have some other official duties to handle while I'm here."

The gears started turning in Bennett’s head as he nodded in understanding. "Well, if you’re here, do you mind if you do us a favor and inspect that ship?" The engineer pointed at a rather large cargo Hulk docked a little further away.

Following his gaze, Rhea brought a finger to her chin and narrowed her eyes. "Are they…?” She murmured as a dangerous look crossed her face before turning back to Bennett.

“They're the ones.” Bennett didn’t even hesitate when he replied, still staring at the large and blocky ship.

Rhea's expression hardened as she made up her mind. "Very well." She snapped her fingers and pointed at a few men on the deck. "You five! Armor up, we’ve got work to do!"

The five knights in question immediately snapped to attention with a salute and hurried below deck while Rhea turned back to Bennett. "If there's any signs of your property, I shall send a runner to have you informed.

"Thanks.” Bennett said as he watched the Knight Captain spin on her heels and follow after her Knight below to armor up herself.

Looking over to what remained of their equipment, Bennett let out a sigh and grabbed both of their rucksacks and their two rifles and started to make his way to the dock. By the time he caught up with the rest of the group, he stopped right next to Elijah who was still trying to catch his breath.

"You could've been a bit gentler, you know," The disgruntled man muttered, still rubbing his solar plexus.

Azeline was the one to speak out as she gave out an annoyed groan. "Be silent, you need a reality check.” She scolded. “For the past few days you’ve done nothing but lust after everyone like a dog in heat.” The blonde narrowed her icy blue eyes at the man “Besides, we have work to do."

“The fuck else was I supposed to do when you hogged my datapad like some kind of gremlin.” Elijah grumbled under his breath.

Azeline was in the middle of turning around when she immediately stopped. “WHAT WAS THAT? I DIDN’T HEAR YOU.” She said loudly while crossing her arms and glaring at the man as if he was a petulant child.

Shifting his eyes a bit, Elijah saw that Yana was right next to the Elf woman’s head, mimicking her every movement as if it were choreographed."... Nothing," Elijah muttered, with his eye twitching.

“That’s what I thought.” The Elf let out a satisfied huff before walking away while the little Fairy copied her every move.

Elijah was already standing next to Auri and the two locked eyes, sharing an incredulous look. They both couldn’t help but shake their heads in derision before Elijah noticed Bennett was heading towards them with a mountain of baggage on his shoulders.

Dropping the two large rucksacks in front of Auri, Bennett pivoted towards Elijah and pushed a rifle and the man’s medpack into his hands. “Here, stop being a bitch.” The engineer sneered, giving Elijah an annoyed look. “Rhea said she's gonna help us pay those shitters a visit.”

Stretching out his back to relieve the tension that was built up, Elijah allowed a small smirk to form on his face as he hummed in interest. “Mmm… Yes, let's.” He replied in a satisfied voice. “Auri, watch our stuff.” The man said as he started to eye the ship's surroundings.

He was on the search for the most optimal route to cover their approach and noticed a few narrow passages that threaded between a cluster of wooden barrels and boxes. Bringing his hand to his small, but growing beard, Elijah was already in the mists of formulating a plan for the eventual egress when Auri spoke up.

“Shouldn’t we just let the Inquisitors take care of it?”

Both of the humans turned around and looked at the woman with a sour look on their face. Sure they could just leave it to their more official attache to re-emerge and pull out their fancy badges and handle it in a bloodless manner… But they wanted to go NOW.

“Ya, didn’t you two constantly complain about how you couldn’t replace any of your… boo-let thingies?” Azeline added, raising an eyebrow at the duo. ”So why waste any more of them if they’re so precious?”

Silence reigned as both Elijah and Bennett stared at the women in irritation. Neither of the men could come to terms with how reasonable of an argument that was, even though it went against their burning desire to just kick down the door and start shooting. This was especially true now that most of their ammo was missing and there was no guarantee that’d ever find it, let alone it being in this ship.

Throwing his head back, Elijah let out a deep and frustrated groan while Bennett facepalm so hard, it made an audible smack. "FINE!” Elijah nearly yelled. “You've got a point…" Elijah grumbled. “I don’t like it, but you still have a point.”

“I can just light the thing on fire, if it’s THAT big of a problem.” Yana suddenly interjected, landing on Elijah’s head.

Elijah’s face contorted into one of confusion as he processed the Fae’s words. “What? No! What the fuck!?” He tried to look up at the being playing with his hair. “We still need information from people and possibly what's INSIDE!”

Yana yanked hard on his hair and shot back, “Well, that thing is causing my…! My uh…” Yana trailed off as her mind worked. “What are you again?”

“Humans.” Bennett Answered in a monotone voice.

“Ya Humans!! The thing is causing my Humies a great amount of stress, so I think fire is a great idea!” She shouted enthusiastically, her eyes gleaming at the prospect of pyrotechnics.

Closing his eyes and pressing both of his hands against the bridge of his nose, Elijah tried his best not to let the insanity of this small being take over him. “Jesus Christ… No. NO!” He shouted out. “No burning, no fire, just NO to whatever crazy shit that's stirring in your head, okay!?”

Slamming her foot down onto the top of his head, Yana crossed her arms and puffed out her cheeks in annoyance but finally relented. "You’re no fun!" she complained before hopping off Elijah's head. “This is why the dumb one won't lay with you!” Yana yelled, pointing at Azeline.

Azeline blinked for a moment, as she stared at who the Vanir was pointing at. “Wait, what!?” She exclaimed as her face turned a shade of red.

Elijah turned to Yana with a face that looked like he was offended and barked. “Bitch, shut your goofy ass up!”

The bickering on the dock seemed to go up an octave as Rhea stood at the edge of her ship, looking down at the chaos below with an arched eyebrow. It was relieving and maddening regardless of the situation, these charlatans were always able to be lighthearted and stay true to themselves. Nevertheless, the time for such frolicsome behavior had passed, she had her duties to carry out.

A metaling clap rang out, causing everyone on the dock to quiet down as they looked over to fully armored knights walking down the plank. “Alright, that’s enough!” Rhea said in a commanding voice.

The Knight Captain and her escorts marched in unison as their armor gleamed in the moonlight. Rhea’s imposing presence and commanding voice were enough to snap the group out of their bickering and caused them to remember why they were there.

“My knights and I shall go inspect the ship, and you five…” Rhea said, walking past the gaggle of idiots before spinning on her heels to face them once more. “Shall stay here.”

Bennett and Elijah exchanged glances, their faces displaying they thought that plan was absolutely absurd. “Only five of you are going to go and inspect a ship that’s potentially full of people?” Elijah asked in a skeptical tone. "That seems… Highly ill advised.”

Rhea looked back at the duo, her eyes narrowing as if she were insulted. "Sir Eli-jah… While I appreciate your concern, but I am no helpless maidan." she replied firmly, her confidence unwavering. “I must wonder how lowly you think of us if you think a middling Freelancer or some jack-boot thug will be anything other than trivial to even a Junior Knight.”

“She's right Eli,” Azeline said, putting a hand on his shoulder before he could retort. “They’re among the best warriors in the Mortal realm, let them handle it.” She whispered, giving him a gentle squeeze to emphasize her point.

Elijah still had his reservations as he shifted his vision between Azeline and Rhea, but ultimately decided to let the matter go. “Alright, Arlight.” He raised his hands, reluctantly conceding. “I’ll leave it to you.” Elijah said, nodding at the woman.

A smile spread across Rhea’s face as the tension seemed to release from her shoulders. She thought the man’s pride would have been a major obstacle and their friendly relationship would have been shattered. But it seemed the enigma of a man that negotiated with a literal God was far more reasonable than she initially suspected. Which is far more than she could say about the plethora of nobles, clergy and even her fellow knight captains that she had encountered over the years.

Especially after they learned she was of common upbringing.

"Thank you, Sir Eli-jah. I promise we will handle this situation efficiently and effectively," Rhea reassured him, her tone firm yet warm.

With a nod, the knights marched towards the suspicious ship, leaving Elijah, Bennett, and their companions behind on the dock. Everyone watched in silence as a flurry of activity erupted on the ship when Rhea finally arrived, shouting orders at the guards pointing their weapons at them. However, it wasn't until the woman raised her Inquisitor seal and demanded capitulation that the ship's workers' demeanor shifted visibly.

Silence reigned as everyone watched the Knights disappear into the bowels of the large cargo ship. Picking their rucksacks back up, the Human’s and their companions wandered over to a collection of small boxes and barrels and readied themselves for what they could only assume as a long wait.

Boredom soon took over the group as they lounged around, staring at the large ship in the distance, but the silence was soon broken by Bennett when he suddenly spoke up. “You know…” The engineer muttered, only to pause for another few seconds. “I think Yana’s right.” He said, looking directly at Elijah.

Elijah slowly turned his head towards Bennett with furrowed brows. “Are you talking to me?” he asked, clearly puzzled by the sudden jab.

Snickers of amusement from both Yana and Azeline echoed out while Auri collapsed both hands over her face.

“I’m just sayin’.” Bennett shrugged, a smirk playing on his lips.

“Bro, shut the fuck up, you sat there talking about Deep Space 9 and VOYAGER for hours the last time I tried to hook you up.” Elijah shot back with a snarl on his face. “I know your flux capacitor virgin ass ain’t talkin’.”

Knowing he struck a nerve, Bennett's smirk widened  and turned into a broad smile as he tried to suppress the laugh that was trying to get out. He tried to get out another quip, but the Azeline beat him to it.

“I don’t know Eli, if you were a little more fun, I wouldn’t be so unwilling to sleep with you.”

Elijah snapped his head towards the blonde Elf woman completely at a loss for words with a face that showed a mixture of irritation and incredulity. However, Azeline simply gave a playful wink, and joined Bennett in a rapturous laughter. The rest of the group snickered, clearly enjoying Elijah’s annoyed reaction as the man once again pressed his hands against his head.

“Y-You know….” Auri Suddenly spoke up with her eyes repeatedly shifting from the floor to Elijah. “I-I’d be more open to the idea if you were a bit more interesting…” She added.

Everyone became silent and looked at each other in shock, unable to believe that the usually shy and quiet Auri had joined in on the teasing.

“AHAHAHHAHA NO ONE WANTS TO FUCK YOU!” Yana cackled like a maniac, pointing at Elijah With glee. The rest of the group couldn't help but burst into laughter as well, thoroughly enjoying the man’s frustration.

“Oohhhh. Ohohoho. I see.” Elijah said, shaking his head in disbelief. “It’s bully Eli day today , isn’t it? Well all of you can suck my dick!” He grumbled as he began walking away.