Eat at Dicks (Patreon)

Despite boasting a freedom he hadn’t enjoyed since before his stay at Overland Correctional, Chrysante’s free agency had long since lost its luster.

For a while the gigs were numerous, and it was nice having something to occupy time while Vance worked. When Vance had free time, Chrys had it too and the quality time spent together was a great way to celebrate their new exclusivity. However, once those jobs were finished, and new postings dried up, Chrysante became increasingly restless alone during the day.

Before long, Chrys found himself dealing cards and making bets with Tinker to fill the void left by his shift at Lucky’s. Boredom was so frequent that every single time his phone rang, he’d be compelled to answer and drag the conversation on for hours. Calls slowed after about a month of that, so imagine his surprise when out of the blue, Holden of all people calls him up asking the civet to come work a shift for a Grand Opening.

At the first mention of work, Chrys booked a Dryft and sped over, barely even listening to the specifics of the job as his companion explained them. With a name like “Dicks” he wasn’t sure what to expect from the restaurant, but upon arrival, the civet strode in confident and ready to perform.

One look around and he was surprised to find that everything looked orderly. Things were clean, tidy, and the place looked just about ready to open. He spent a little while perusing the menu and set off to meet with Holden and his associate– a man he’d come to know as Argus.

Orientation was short, given he received the bulk of his instruction over the phone earlier. Though he wasn’t paying as much attention as he probably should have, Chrysante wasn’t at all concerned about his role as a server. He’d spent the better half of his adulthood slinging rings, cards, and chips across gambling tables– delivering food would be far less taxing on his manicure… AND he still got tips.

Easy peasy… or so he thought.

One look at the uniform and the little color in his face drained out. It looked as though Holden had taken a pair of scissors to his apron, cutting a modest hole for his manhood to show through. It was something he’d expect from that horny mutt as a joke, so it irked him to be reprimanded for wearing boxer briefs underneath it.

Chrysante reluctantly obliged and retired his periwinkle shorts, not wanting to ruin this break in monotony by being disagreeable. He was never particularly unnerved by his or anyone else’s nudity, but there was something extremely unsettling about aggressive freeballing while people ate around you.

“Okay weird, whatever…” He grumbled, attempting to ignore how this entire premise gnawed at his sensibilities.

Chrysante never liked mixing food with pleasure. The idea of whipped cream or chocolate on a naked body always felt gross and sticky, regardless of how delicious they were separate. Imagining parading around while strangers slurped, smacked, and snorted down their entrees turned his stomach, and the longer he forced down the concept, the more irritable he got.

Fortunately for him, rudeness was the name of the game for this establishment, and anyone entering Dicks knew to expect shitty attitudes from the wait staff. Knowing Chrys, he was probably requested specifically for his barbed tongue and would have probably lasted the entire shift had he not occupied his temper with his social media feed.  

Unfortunately, there's a rule about that...

He lasted about as long as it took him to be seen with it twice.