Dinner and a floor show (Patreon)

The dinner gong had rung out in the great dining hall and Celestia had officially announced the beginning of the Service to the Crown Royal Banquet in my Equestria dreamscape. As a chamber quartet began to play the kitchen and palace staff shifted into top gear.

With the precision of a military operation dozens of unicorn waiters marched into the dining hall bringing the first course of the evening. The invitation stated that this would be twelve-course meal so I had dined only lightly throughout the day and early evening. Still I had no idea how I would eat that much food. Fortunately the portions were modest in size so they did not overwhelm you.

The first course was a soup. Great tureens of blue and white porcelain trimmed with gold and silver were rolled out on elegant carts along with stacks of matching bowls. With amazing grace and precision the bowls were levitated into a slow, spinning helical spiral. Then one-by-one silver ladles filled the bowls with creamy bisque. Once the bowls were full other waiters levitated them to their locations in front of hungry ponies. As they finished this step they garnished the soup with fresh minced herbs. The soup was a velvety, smooth cream of Brie bisque that practically glided down the throat.

As the soup was being dispersed several smaller groups of unicorn waiters sprang into action. One group began filling the water glasses with sparkling mineral water; the second group started pouring a crisp Sauvignon Blanc style white wine into small crystal glasses. A third group trotted in wearing panniers full of warm, freshly baked, buttery rolls; with practiced accuracy they began levitating slow volleys of rolls on to awaiting plates.

The entire spectacle was performed without a word spoken amongst the waiters. Within a couple minutes the operation was completed and they silently retreated back to the kitchen.

For the next ten minutes or so the hall was filled with soft, sweet sounds of a string quartet, the occasional sounds of small talk and the noise of ponies enjoying their soup.

Again without apparent signal the second course entered the hall. The soup bowls were removed as earth pony waiters entered the hall escorted by unicorn assistants. The earth ponies were pulling little carts with enormous, ornately carved wooden bowls on top of them. Festooning the carts were numerous baskets filled with fresh greens, herbs, nuts and fruits. Great flasks of liquid hung from bandoleers around the earth ponies’ necks like artillery shells.

Once the earth ponies had reached their assigned place in the dining hall they stopped, gracefully unlimbered themselves from the carts and went to work. It quickly became obvious to everypony gathered that the next course was going to be a salad. Fresh chilled greens and herbs were tossed with deft hoofs. Into the mixture were added a plethora of freshly sliced fruits. Strawberries, blackberries, and diced peaches, now mingled with baby spinach, arugula, butter leaf lettuce, and bitter herbs.

In smaller wooden bowls oil was poured from the flasks the ponies had brought with them. Once the flasks had been put away, smaller cruets of red wine vinegar, and honey added their contents to the salad dressing that was being made before our eyes. Fresh cracked black pepper and a pinch of sea salt was mixed in as ponies whipped the dressing with whisks of new, clean straw. Then dressing was added to the salad and mixed. The salad was quickly scooped onto chilled plates garnished with chopped walnuts and with the help of unicorn assistants they were levitated to eagerly awaiting ponies. The contrast of the tart greens and some cases very bitter herbs with the sweet fruit and dressing made for a very refreshing salad.

The wine glasses were replaced and a fruity Beaujolais Nouveau style red wine that complimented the salad.

The salad was followed by little individual baskets made of finely shredded potato that had been deep fried in molds that gave them their shape. The baskets were then filled with sweet, still slightly crisp cooked green peas with a Mornay sauce drizzled over them.

Gnocchi-style potato dumplings were next. They were served baked with a tangy marinara sauce and rich layer of Parmesan and a creamy, fresh Mozzarella like cheese that was melted under a broiler until it was golden and bubbly.

Great Portobello mushroom caps as large as a foal’s hoof were marinated in garlic and olive oil then broiled with buttered breadcrumbs and garnished with finely grated sharp Grickencrock cheese and lemon wedges followed.

After the mushrooms were beautiful spears of asparagus no bigger in a diameter than a pencil, and almost impossible to obtain at this time of the year, were quickly sautéed in butter and then rolled up in crepes of almost ethereal thinness. A Beurre Blanc sauce of butter, finely minced shallots and chives was drizzled over them.

Of equal quality were the selections of beverages accompanying these dishes. For younger guests like Applebloom or anyone not desiring or unable of having any alcohol there were appropriate fresh fruit juices and wonderful teas. Even the sparkling water that evening had a most bewitching flavor it. Usually I am a beer drinker but this evening the wines selected for courses were just fine with me.

For the next few hours this grand dining theater unfolded in front of us as dish after glorious dish brought for us to savor. There was even a twenty-minute intermission in which one could retire to the restroom before the final act began. Also at a couple points during the meals foals from Celestia’s own academy choir came out and sang for the ponies gathered in the hall.

At first the group from my household, along with Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy were a bit cautious and very careful to make certain we committed no faux pas at the table, however as meal progressed we grew more comfortable with our surroundings and soon we chatting and laughing with the rest of the guests.

Much to my relief Fluttershy and Carousel got along with each other very well and soon were swapping tales with each other. Even Petina seemed to enjoy listening to their discussions and provided her own comments.

For the first hour Rainbow Dash was almost timid at the table as if she was painfully aware of the carnage she’d accidentally caused during the last Grand Galloping Gala. However as the evening progressed she became more and more laid back. Of course the fact that she didn’t pass on any of the wines offered probably was contributing to her mellow mood.

The mushroom potpies had just been delivered to our table when RD suddenly smiled at me.

“You know Brick, I don’t know about you but I am having a wonderful time tonight with you and your friends.” Said the prismatic mare. “I feared I’d be soooo bored at this fancy schmancy party, but I’m having the time of my life. I may have not met the Wonderbolts but I don’t care right now.”

I smiled back at my boss. “Well the feeling is mutual Dash. You and Fluttershy have made this a night I’ll remember for quite a while.”

Dash took a rather large sip of wine and shot me a rather smoldering look. “That’s what I like about you Brick. You’re honest and yet so polite to everypony.”

I suddenly felt a hoof and canon gently rubbing against the spat on my right back canon. It took a couple seconds to realize it was Dash who was doing it. She continued to smile at me.

“I certainly hope Petina and Carousel realize what they’ve got in you because I bet there are quite a few mares who’d happy to make you their own.”

Dash finished her glass of wine as her leg began rubbing further up the inside of mine.

I was starting to wonder how much of this conversation was her and how much was all the wine she’d drunk. I looked over at the rest of our party. Fluttershy and Carousel were having an amusing discussion about woodpeckers, and either Petina really enjoying listening to them or she deliberately letting Dash have her little under the table fantasy. I just smiled at her.

“Oh.” I tried to say in a casual fashion while slowly attempting to move leg away. “So do I know any of these interested mares?”

“Maybe.” Smiled the cyan colored mare as she quickly wrapped other leg around mine to keep it from moving away. Dash was resting her chin now on her front hoofs and was staring at me with her undivided attention.

Suddenly I felt as if some other pony was watching me. Breaking Dash’s stare I looked down the Great Table. It took me a second to find the observer. Princess Celestia was levitating a crystal chalice and slowly sipping wine from it but her eyes were locked on to Dash and I. Then my eyes met hers, for second our to we just stared at each other. Slowly she lowered the chalice and just gave that sweet, little signature smile that she is so known for.

My mind was now racing a million miles an hour now. Did Celestia know what was going on under her table right now? Did she approve? Had she manipulated the seating arrangement to see if such a scenario would arise? Was she some how subtly magically manipulating RD and I to see what would happen? That seemed unlikely but I had heard rumors about the Princess of the Sun being earthier than she is given credit for that so I couldn’t completely discount it. Why did I that sweet little smile of hers seem so annoying right now?

Dash didn’t seem to notice Celestia stare or didn’t care. RD’s eyes were closed and one of her rear hoofs had moved up to my inner thigh. It was taking quite some effort for me to maintain my composure under this onslaught. I glanced over and found that Celestia was still watching us out of the corner of her eye as she chewed on her potpie. Even while chewing she had that sweet little smile. That sweet little smile that was starting to really aggravate me!

The waiters came and removed Dash and I’s mostly uneaten potpies and brought the champagne and raspberry ice to cleanse our palettes before the start of the dessert courses. Flutes of champagne joined the ices on the table. Dash ignored the chilled bowl of shaved ice. She did however down her glass of champagne in one heroic chug. Petina noticed this gesture and looked back and forth between us and then got the most lecherous of grins.

“Well you two seem to be really enjoying the banquet. Is Brick keeping you entertained RD?” Chimed the white unicorn mare in overly chipper voice.

“Yeah he’s been great!” Purred RD, her hoof suddenly shifted and began rubbing my lower belly, right about where my…”

“If I may have ever ponies attention please!” Princess Celestia’s voice rang out across the dining hall as she slowly stood up. RD suddenly seemed to become aware of her surroundings and realized what she was doing in public. She blushed a color not unlike the raspberry ice in front her and quickly moved her rear hoofs back to her side of the table.

“Thank you.” Said the Princess of the Sun. “Tonight we are gathered to not only enjoy a wonderful meal prepared by fine staff of the palace, but also to share in the friendship and camaraderie of each other this evening.”

The hall filled with the sound of hoofs stomping on the floor. Celestia let this go on for a few seconds and signaled for silence.

“Friendship is an amazing and powerful force. From it we can gain strength and wisdom, from it grows loyalty and devotion, from it can blossom love and a lifetime of commitment.” Celestia’s gaze paused on Dash and I for what seemed like an eternity.

“But if it is mishandled or neglected friendship can lead to bitterness, jealousy and regret. Like a beautiful garden it must cared for and nurtured. When given love and attention it can inspire us to achieve more than we thought we were capable of. It basis upon which all of Equestria is built upon, please remember that when you leave this dinner tonight. That is all.”

The hall thundered with applause. Celestia settled back on to her throne and turned her attention to five layer chocolate cake that was now making its grand entrance.

The cake was delicious but I was thinking of other things.

To be continued.