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CHYOA Contest Entry 1; Part 1 (Patreon)

Published:
2024-04-26 17:10:37
Imported:
2024-05
Tags:

Content

Sponsored by Don Alejo!

The story is called 'Psych 347: Sex and Sexuality.' It is, at it's core, a play on the 'Sex Ed goes Hands On' trope. It's a mind control story with heavy doses of exhibitionism, group sex (mff) and some romance to tie it together. I've currently posted the first 7,000 words, a little over half I think.

LINK TO CHYOA FIRST POST

Please give it a read there, and give each chapter a Thumbs Up if you enjoy it!

Why only post it there for now?

The CHYOA competition is taking into account Reads/Likes as well as judging on the actual story by a Panel. The more folks who read it there, the more it will boost my numbers.

Why bother with this contest again?

The winner gets to choose a story to be featured on the front page of CHYOA for a year. That's big potential free advertisement. I'm also working on CorruptingPower for us to start posting the QT-verse there, so I would use that for my chosen story to get eyes on him and the other QT writers to. Tides raise all ships! (If he ends up not going for it, I'll probably post FoF over there and use that).

Comments

FlareNight

It's odd because it's not a problem I've ever seen you have before, but you're adding a ton of unnecessary dialogue tags. From: “Right,” I said. Through: “But it didn’t work on me?” I asked. Every single dialogue tag (including those) is superfluous. The problem probably continues, but that's the point I'm at currently and I thought it was worth mentioning now. Edited to add: Unless you absolutely have to, including a political affiliation for the Senate candidate can't help. Until you're specific, everyone will just assume that they're on the appropriate side for their own affiliations.

FlareNight
>>136341154

There are fewer examples in later chapters, but it's definitely worth fixing. I think the other issues that jumped out are just from you being Canadian. Realized I should mention that I like the story, although I don't think I'd put a new chapter above anything else currently rotating. But there already isn't anything on CHYOA that I would read before a new chapter you posted here.

Trav

how you come up with these crazy hot stories continues to blow me away Break. You've got another great one going. I hope everyone goes and clicks on the thumbs up button for you, cause you surely deserve to win