SPACE CAMP: The Revisoning (Patreon)

Matt and I had a check-in with our book agent and I kinda-sorta out-of-my-ass estimated I'd be done revising the sample chapter of Space Camp in the next few months and she was like 'Great, I'll start shopping the pitch around to publishers in the fall then." which means I.................. actually have to finish revising that sample chapter now and put together the pitch package 😬😬😬😬😬😬😬

The chapter I'm polishing up is Day Two, which was 16 pages in my first draft (that I shared here on Patreon) and is now 22 pages after my first revision. 

While working on the first draft, I was just plowing through my notes, trying to get all that information down as quickly as possible. The result is a lot of text-heavy, cramped pages that definitely get the job done as far as conveying the information, but they're not necessarily the best comics pages. 

For example, here's the original page 22 (I was talking about my psych recommending I try dunking my face in ice water if I start to mentally spiral out):

You know what's better than drawing one page? Drawing FOUR.

There's three beats to the original page: 1) My reflection on my psych's advice, 2) the rest of the class chiming in with their personal methods of interrupting panic attacks, and 3) the TIPP Skills. 

In my revision, I gave each of those main points space to breath- especially the TIPP Skills. 

My original draft didn't explain how or why the TIPP Skills work. Here, I really elaborated on them, turning this section into a Teachable Moment™. 

I'd like the book to have these little interjections with information on the techniques and methods we practiced in classes so that people can pick up some skills that help them too. Ideally, the lessons will transition in and out seamlessly with the rest of my personal story, but who knows if I'll actually pull that off. That's what the third round of revisions will be for!

Anyway, here's me and my Leaning Tower of PEAsa.