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hey guys, i'm sorry i have to do this - but i really can't produce video content right now.


i won't bore you with the extensive details - but the last month or so has been one of the hardest of my life. it's nothing to do with covid-19, don't worry - i've just kind of reached my limit and i really can't do anything right now. i pretty much just sleep all day, i can't think straight when i'm awake and i'm just not strong enough to get out of bed for long enough to record a video. i've tried several times the last couple weeks to make SOMETHING but i'm so flat and terrible and breathless and just exhausted sounding when i record and i've just had to give up for now. it's probably impossible for me to produce a good video, no matter how hard i try or how many times i go at it - so i'm just going to stop trying until i feel ready to go again.


i really hate to do this. i want to make videos, i have ideas, but i just physically can't right now. i feel especially awful for those of you who could really use new videos from me given the current circumstances in the world, but i honestly feel that even if i forced myself to produce something and worked so hard to make it okay it just wouldn't be to standard, and i don't want to make something that bad. i totally understand that people will unpledge because of this and i really respect that, thank you for all of your support until now. i won't hold anything against you whatsoever.


i don't know how long it will be until my next upload, honestly - i hope it won't be too long, a month at most! hell, i might start feeling better and get something ready for you guys within a week or two, i just can't say. i just wanted to inform all of you so you don't just think i've disappeared because i'm here, i'm trying my best and as soon as humanely possible i will have more videos up for you.


thank you so much, as always. hopefully i'll be seeing you really soon.


(p.s patron letters for this month will still be sent out, don't worry.)


Comments

Anonymous

Take all the time you need. ❤️

Anonymous

No worries, try not to sweat it too much. It may not feel great but everyone needs a break every now & then. No ones gonna cruicify you for taking care of yourself. 2020 may be starting off terribly but just try to hang in there ok?

Anonymous

I think that if there's any people who would understand is us supporters. And personally I think it's totally okay to feel that way, and you taking the initiative to fix things and better yourself is what matters the most. It's not about quality content or producing consistently - Just how you care about the people out there, I'm sure we can all agree that we care for you the same way. No matter how long it'll take, we'll be around for you, that's why we're here for. Take care of yourself :D

Anonymous

No problem, wishing the best for you.

Goldenhand

Take all the time you need, your own wellbeing is what matters most, we'll be right here when you're back in a good place.

Anonymous

Don't beat yourself up about it. Take all the time you need and hang in there, we'll always be here.

Anonymous

No worries. I'm still gonna be here when its all over. You put out great work and need a break every once in a while. I don't think anyone will hold it against you.

Anonymous

You’ve helped all of us through hard times and it’s our turn to pay you back for all those times you were there for us, we’ll be there for you, as long as it takes. Just know we’ll all be waiting for your return however long it takes. Thank you for informing us about your state so we don’t have to worry about what happened to you. We love you Ellie! ❤️

Fallen Phoenix

you have to put your health first. Take all the time you need. Nothing wrong with taking a break when you need it. We will be here when you get back with virtual head pats and hugs

Azradun

You need to rest and relax now. Pushing it right now will only make it worse. I pledged because I enjoyed your previous work immensely, and I don't want any new work for the price of your health. It's just not worth it.

Anonymous

Rest as much as needed, your health should be top priority. No reason to over exert yourself. We'll be waiting patiently :)

Anonymous

I look forward to your return, I hope the best and that it all works out. We'll miss you,

AnonyNoire

Your health comes first! Completely understandable! Please don't worry! Health first! <3

Anonymous

I'm sorry your not feeling well. Take whatever time you need, we can wait. Just get to feeling better!

Elichama

I'm very late to this but as longtime listener who hasn't said much, don't at all feel bad for taking some time for yourself! You've helped a ton of us rest and relax and it's only fair that you do the same for yourself.