Doubt (Patreon)
Content
4:49AM. Tears pooled beneath Lily’s eyes. In the darkness of her own apartment, her phone’s cold glow felt like a reassuring beacon. The tingle in her jaw was starting to fade.
"You dumb fuck!" the young woman whispered to herself with rage, letting a couple tears detach and roll down her cheeks. Like many before her, Lily didn’t have much time to react to the virus' first symptoms, and the alcohol running in her blood hadn't helped her judgement.
Frustration and regrets set in the young woman's mind as she replayed the last moments over and over. In the back of her head, her own voice whispered thoughts she desperately tried to push away. Sitting on the cold laminate floor, Lily wasn't ready to admit she had brought this on herself.
"Fifteen minutes..." Lily thought as she looked at the last message displayed on her phone. As she closed her eyes, more tears fell on her bare knees. The tiny blonde breathed in deep, trying to stop her body from shaking anymore. These were the last moments she would live as Lily Connors - the real her. Despite her change in stature, Lily enjoyed the idea that, for now, she remained intact in people's memories. Until Lex opened the door, she wasn't "bug girl" yet.
As the minutes passed, Lily continued to think. Every now and then, she would slap her body on the screen in fearful panic, hoping to prevent the phone from turning off. She had been too small for the screen to register her hands long before she had finished shrinking.
"Real brave in the face of danger huh, Lily?" the tiny woman whispered to herself as she looked at the messages she had sent Lex as she was shrinking. She hated them. As her eyes set on the brightly displayed "Please" in front of her, Lily took a sharp breath hoping to prevent a sob that still overcame her. Despite remembering how afraid she had been a few minutes ago, she couldn't admit to herself that the last text she'd ever send was one where she begged.
"But I was so scared..." Lily replied to her own thought as she remembered typing the message needing her whole hands to press each key. More tears flowed out of the little blonde's eyes.
3%.
The bar showing how much battery was left in her phone had, just like her, grown terribly small during the past few minutes. The wait for Lex to arrive felt infinite. Beyond the high heels towering next to her, Lily couldn't see a thing. The shrunken woman realized she could smell the faint scents of leather and sweat coming out of her own shoes. Turning towards them, she tried to imagine her bare feet fitting in and filling their immensity. Lily promised herself to never forget that it once did.
2%.
Anguish rose in Lily's mind and body as the phone's battery once again grew smaller.
"What the fuck are you doing, Lex?" Lily shouted as loudly as her now tiny voice allowed. It couldn't be heard further than the kitchen, a couple steps away.
Lily had only met Lex a couple years ago. The two had met at a bar where Lex used to work. After a long night of drinking and partying, the brunette had helped a particularly out of shape Lily get home safely. The rest was history. The tiny woman didn't consider Lex her best friend and she was certain Lex didn't either. However, there was a certain strength to the girl that reassured Lily in the face of her current situation. While she was certain Lex wouldn't treat her like tiny royalty, she also knew she wouldn't leave her there or worse, crush her on the spot. In a world where finding helpless shrinkies was as easy as looking down, it was a quality Lily admired in Lex.
1%.
Contacting Lex had been Lily's first instinct as panic overtook her. Now however, as she sat alone with her thoughts, the tiny blonde couldn't help but doubt. The idea that she had made a mistake was eating at her as she imagined all the terrible things Lex could do with her now. While her friend's behavior towards shrinkies always felt merciful in comparison to her own, it seemed far more dreadful now that she saw the world from a shrunken point of view. Unable to type anymore and too afraid to deplete the phone's last percent of charge, Lily remained still as her eyes focused on Lex's messages.
"It's Lex. That's how she talks." Lily whispered under her breath, trying to calm her nerves.
Darkness suddenly engulfed the room. The phone's battery had finally run out. Lily's heart fastened as her hands desperately searched for the familiar surface of the screen. She pressed it over and over but couldn't bring it back this time. She was alone, tiny and in the dark.
She was terrified.
Have you ever thought about who you'd call if you found yourself tiny? I'm not asking you in a fantasy context but a survival one. Who would you trust enough to find you in a such a weakened state. Are you sure they're the right choice?
The anguish one would feel in Lily's situation has always been a size topic that fascinates me. I knew I had to make something around it someday. I hope I managed to transcribe this particularly dreadful situation both visually and through my writing. Also, we're getting an indirect apparition from Lex as this piece is set in the same universe than Dust!
As always, I hope you enjoy it! :)