Fus Ro Giggle: The Way of the Bimbo Voice (mp3) (Patreon)

Hey girls, are you tired of being taken seriously?

Do you hate it when boys expect you to know things about stuff?

Do you wish you could just sound like a cute little anime girl and get showered with positive attention?

If so, then I have a program for you! Introducing The Bimbo Voice! A mystical power so completely beyond comprehension that even scienstitions are like "whoa".

Utilizing The Bimbo Voice is like being the main character in an open world RPG that gets released a billion times on multiple platforms, you'll become an unstoppable force and probably make a lot of money too!

With The Bimbo Voice you can totally Fus Ro Giggle your way to success in any situation. So listen closely Bimboborn and I will share the way of the Bimbo Voice with you…

First, you gotta remember to keep your words little.. And by that i mean like, don’t use lots of words with.. Umm… like, umm silly balls? I think that's how you say that? Yeah don’t use too many silly balls… in fact try not to have any more than two balls in your mouth at a time!

Second, also make sure to have, like, a rising sound at the end of your sentence. This one is, like, supes important and it can take a whole lot of practice to get it right. But you like practicing with your holes a lot, right?

Third, and this one is like supes important.. Obvi.. make your words cute. Like why do you even gotta say the whole word when youlike  can totes shorten it and make it sound lit af and like way more fab than like boring school words.  So like if you’re feeling wicked dope and wanna deadass be bimbobossin’ like a mf’ning queen then get your drippy ass keen to a betterer vocab and stuff.

Third.. Uhh no wait.. fourth.. I think.. numbers are hard… when using the power of the bimbo voice, make sure to direct it at your intended target, usually a man.. Because they have a -25% resistance to the bimbo voice. It’s right there in the tool tip.

Anyhoozies.. Just look at that man and be like..

“Oh my god!” that phrase will totally get his attention, it’s like taunting the boss monster.

Next follow it up with the classic..

“Oh my god, I am like sooo stupid!” see now you have your hooks in, this powerful taunt will keep him focused on your tits and thus distracted while you get what you’re really after..

And finally use the voice once more to add.. “Fuck my harder daddy!”

Congratulations Bimboborn, you have defeated the boss and can now collect your reward of gold right from his wallet… along with a series of gift cards and shiny new clothes from ye olde shopping mall..

That is the way of the bimbo voice. Fus Ro Giggle!