Naruto Shippuden: Fanboy From the Mist - Chapter 1: Mentor (Patreon)

Konohamaru sat in his seat in class with his head in the palm of his left hand and drumming the desk with the fingers on his right. 

By his side, Udon and Moegi were having a chat with one another about some silly missions they had with one another before coming here. One was about trying to find a dog and the other was helping some old lady with her groceries. It was dumb. He didn’t care. 

Why were they sounding so happy about it in the first place? All that garbage sounded like the most trite and boring stuff imaginable. Perhaps they found moments like this easier to sit through when they discussed things equally as mundane.

The three of them were currently alone in the old classroom that Iruka taught in. They weren’t in the academy anymore, of course, as they were now well and true, proper Genin that were allowed to go on missions. They were allowed higher ranked missions after the Pain incident but there were more times than Konohamaru would have liked where they were tasked with doing chores for old people or children.

It happened one too many times for him to be okay with it, we’ll say that.

Now, Ebisu had instructed them to wait here before he arrived as today’s mission was supposedly going to be something rather new and special. He wondered what this possibly could have been but he was mostly really bored considering how Ebisu tended to operate. 

Most of his missions were of the “kind gentlemen” sort. Boring stuff.

“You alright Konohamaru?” Moegi finally spoke up, trying to catch Konohamaru’s attention. Udon stopped speaking and looked over at him as well, taking notice of his bored expression. No one wore that expression better than he could.

“I’m fine.” Konohamaru said simply before adding onto that statement rather fast, “I’m just wondering what sort of nonsense Master Ebisu has in store for us today.”

“Wondering about it isn’t going to make the time go by any faster. If you wanna take a nap, now’s your chance.” Udon giggled. Konohamaru sighed.

He was considering it.

What luck now that the door opened up and produced not one, but two people. 

Konohamaru poked his head up with genuine interest all of a sudden. 

“These three are Konohamaru, Moegi, and Udon.” Ebisu stood in the doorway and pointed the three of them out as he walked in with what looked like a kid from the academy by his side. 

The kid blinked when he saw the three of them and heard Ebisu read their names out to him.

“Ah… cool.” The boy with light blue hair said with a growing smile. “Real ninja…”

Konohamaru took notice of that. Admiration? Well, well, well. Looks like Master Ebisu brought someone rather smart into the room.

“You three. Get down here please.” Ebisu asked, looking up at the three of them. “I’d like you to meet the patron of your next mission. His name is Tabe and he’s an academy student.”

The three ninja in the seats up above zipped from behind the desks they were sitting at and landed hastily in front of the kid.

Without needing much to prompt them, they each stuck their hands out for a shake and Tabe smiled and shook their hands back.

“It’s really cool getting a chance to meet real ninja!” Tabe grinned a wide smile that showed off pretty much all his teeth. Moegi giggled, thinking he was a cute kid. Udon simply smiled warmly. Konohamaru had a bit of a neutral expression on his face.

“So… Master Ebisu, what’s the mission?” Konohamaru asked, looking up at him.

Ebisu cleared his throat and fixed his glasses. “Ah. Yes. Absolutely. Well, today is a very special assignment for you three. Tabe here isn’t from the Hidden Leaf Village. At least not originally. He just moved here from the Hidden Mist.”

“Oh wow!” Udon gasped. “That so rarely happens! Welcome!”

Tabe blushed and bowed with a smile on his face. “Thanks for having me.”

“Right.” Ebisu continued. “He’s still just a young boy and an academy student at that. However, he hasn’t been transferred to anyone’s class just yet. His mother, however, wishes to allow us to be his mentors for the time span it takes to sort all the paperwork out, which, admittedly, could take quite a while. He wants to have ninja who are close to his age range be his guide and help him see what it means to be a Hidden Leaf Ninja. I’m sure you three know what this means right?”

“Tutoring!” Moegi said.

“Mentoring!” Udon smirked.

“Babysitting.” Konohamaru giggled.

Tabe blushed. “Wh…? I-I’m not a baby sir. I can go potty just fine in the toilet! Honest.” He really wasn’t lying. Konohamaru sweat-dropped.

“Uh… no, that was a joke.” Konohamaru said quickly. 

Tabe immediately smiled and began giggling. “OH! I get it now! Haha!”

Konohamaru raised a brow. This kid was a bit of a strange one. Either that or he was just really nervous to the point where this social meet up was getting to him. Perhaps it’d be best to break the ice and show him that he wasn’t to be feared but revered.

“I’ll leave you to it then.” Ebisu smiled and waved before turning to leave. “I’ll check in later for a full report on your progress.”

“Yes sir!” The three ninja said in unison as their teacher left them with their assignment.

“Thank you guys for having me.” Tabe said, as kind as he could be. He didn’t want to get off on the wrong foot here. 

Konohamaru rubbed a finger under his nose and grinned. “Ha. No problem. You’re lucky it was us who got chosen to show you the ropes.”

“OH? Really? Are you like, some sort of super special strong guy?” Tabe asked raising a brow with a smile. Moegi rolled her eyes and Udon stood in confusion.

“Well, I don’t like to brag but…” Konohamaru grinned, putting his hands behind his head and looking back.

“Yes, you do.” Moegi grumbled.

“Either way, I’m pretty good. The Konohamaru Ninja Squad is pretty famous around these parts. YOU might have even heard of us where you live.” Konohamaru said, pointing a thumb to his chest.

“Nope. Never heard of you.” Tabe said, waving that off. Konohamaru did a face plant.

Moegi and Udon giggled.

“Oh, but I have heard of Naruto Uzumaki! He’s like, the guy who took out Pain and did all that neat stuff during the Fourth Great Ninja War right? It’s the kind of stuff that the Leaf Ninja did that made my family want to move here and he was a big part of that.” Tabe explained.

Konohamaru pouted and looked to the side before smirking once again. “Oh? Naruto? Yeah, I know him. He says he’s gonna be the Sixth Hokage. After him, I’m gonna be the Seventh.”

“Not if someone else becomes the Sixth first.” Moegi said. “That can still happen. There’s still powerful  Jōnin out there ready to take Granny Tsunade’s place.”

“Yeah but Gaara is super young and he’s Kazekage. I’m sure Naruto could have the spot if he wanted.” Konohamaru waved it off. “Who would they even get? Guy-sensei?”

“Kakashi.” Udon stated.

“Kakashi? Pfft. Who’d trust a dude who hides his face all the time?” Konohamaru said, brushing that off.

Tabe interrupted just then. “Uhm… excuse me but did you say you KNOW Naruto?”

Konohamaru’s eyes widened and he turned to face him with a wide grin. “Yup. Me and him are rivals. I taught him a few things myself.”

“Other way around.” Moegi whispered and fake coughed.

“WHOA! Now THAT’S cool! Can we go see him?!” Tabe exclaimed, eyes sparkling.

“Now hold on!” Konohamaru raised a finger. “You’re here to get teachings from US. We’re just as good, if not better than Naruto, right guys?”

“Uh…” Udon blinked, snot dripping from his nose.

Konohamaru sweat-dropped once again and then grumbled as he crossed his arms. “Tell you what, you two can go on ahead and get Ramen or something. I’LL hang with the kid here and teach him some neat stuff. No need for you guys to get caught up in the crossfire.”

Moegi rolled her eyes. “Fine. Let’s go Udon. The two boys here need some alone time. We’ll definitely be back later though.” She said, grabbing Udon’s arm and leading him out the door.

When they left, Konohamaru smiled. “So… you REALLY wanna see Naruto?”

“Oh yes! I would very much like to meet him!” Tabe exclaimed, practically dancing in place.

“Fine. Let’s go and see what the boss is up to.” Konohamaru sighed, relenting with a casual smile on his face.

--

Three shuriken hit the broad side of a standing target in the center of the training field. 

The person who threw them, Naruto Uzumaki, landed on his feet and dusted his hands off, admiring the way they landed with precision and couldn’t help but flash back to his earlier days as a ninja. He’d always been relatively good at throwing them but man did it feel smooth as butter when it did it nowadays.

“Alright. I guess there isn’t too big a reason for me to keep training like this so I guess I’ll pack it in soon.” The boy said to himself, about ready to turn away before he heard two people land behind him.

Konohamaru and Tabe came on the scene immediately. Before Tabe could speak up and ask Naruto to keep going so he could observe him, Konohamaru shot forward and went for a surprise kick at him. This surprised Tabe as he hadn’t exactly been made too clear of the dynamic he and Konohamaru shared.

Konohamaru swung his leg around for a kick at Naruto which saw Naruto turning and blocking him with his arm.

Naruto then spun and shot a fist into Konohamaru’s gut! 

The poor boy’s eyes widened and he gasped, flying back and rolling onto his butt with his stomach clenched.

“Ugh… I-I think I almost had you there…” Konohamaru couldn’t help but blush a bit at that.

Naruto sighed and put his hands on his hips before grinning over at him. “Really? From where I’m standing that was a rather pathetic showing. Have you been keeping up with your training at all?”

Konohamaru pouted and blushed, looking to the side. He had but obviously it wasn’t enough to impress Naruto just yet. At least not from just that one kick.

“Uhm… excuse me… a-are YOU Naruto Uzumaki?” Tabe asked with his eyes wide and sparkling.

“Uh… yes. Yes I am. Why?” Naruto asked.

“No reason. I’m just… no… I mean… I uh… w-will you sign my arm!?” Tabe asked, sticking his arm out. Naruto blinked and blushed a bit. He understood now. This kid was a fan.

“Oh… well, I’d love to but I don’t have a pen.” Naruto grinned. “Besides, why your arm? It’s just gonna wash away. We can get a scrap book or a piece of paper.”

“Oh wow! You’re so smart and cool! Excellent idea!” Tabe said, standing up straight with a look of exasperation already on his face.

Konohamaru sat there and watched this ball washing go on uninterrupted for a good few minutes before he stood up and dusted himself off. 

“Alright, alright. That’s enough.” Konohamaru said. “Naruto here isn’t all THAT special.”

Naruto and Tabe were in the middle of talking when Konohamaru interrupted to say that. Tabe looked confused while Naruto’s face narrowed a bit.

“Honestly, when I first met him he was such a scrub. I called him boss back then but he’s gotten too big for his britches.” Konohamaru’s eyes were closed and he was waving Naruto off with a confident smile on his face. “All this Akatsuki and Fourth Great Ninja War stuff has gone to his head. Be careful to expect too much when you meet your heroes kid because it all goes down-hill from heeeEEEEEEEEEK~!”

Konohamaru’s diarrhea of the mouth was interrupted when he suddenly found himself on his tippy-toes due to a wedgie that Naruto snuck behind him and began administering, yanking his underoos out the back of his pants and hiking them up to the back of his neck.

“Wow,” Naruto began. “These are some nice Kamen Rider undies. I’m almost jealous.”

Tabe giggled as he watched this happen. The blushing face and the crossed eyes on Konohamaru looked quite goofy and funny. He was still going “EEEEEEEEE” as Naruto teased him about his childish briefs. Even Tabe wore boxers despite being far younger than both of them.

“I gotta say though, it’s a bit unbecoming of you to be wearing such childish undies. Perhaps you could reframe from running your mouth when you have tons of things about yourself that you need to work on too. Like your skill and when you’re being a hypocrite.” Naruto smirked and kept the wedgie going.

“HAHGUH! AAAYGH!” Konohamaru gasped and drooled as the wedgie continued. The pain was making him light-headed. Naruto was starting to actually lift him off the ground and even began bouncing him a bit.

Briefs, being what they were, were already super tight so the underwear shooting up his butt and crushing into his balls made for an extremely painful experience. Not to mention, Konohamaru had been blowing smoke about Naruto’s skill. He was feeling it now and denying that it was there would probably see him landing in a worse spot.

Konohamaru’s legs began to dangle and then flail about as he tried his best to reach behind him and readjust his underwear. Naruto would grin and bounce him a bit every time he tried to though.

“Hey Tabe, take this as a word of warning. A true ninja is always aware of his short-comings and never says things that goes against his better judgement.” Naruto winked.

Tabe smiled and took out his phone, snapping several pictures of Konohamaru’s cross-eyed, goofy looking face. 

In fact, Konohamaru kept making weird faces with each wedgie bounce he got. One was an “O” shaped mouth one. Another was one with clenched teeth. Despite that though, they all looked just as silly as the last. It was kind of amazing.

“Boingy-boingy.” Naruto muttered as he kept bouncing Konohamaru about. 

“AUGH! M-My butt! My crotch! St-Stop! It’s making me feel all weird and tingly down there!” Konohamaru managed to squeak out, drooling a bit more as he felt the undies start to stretch over his head with each painful tug.

“Oh? Is that code for the fact that getting a wedgie makes you all excited down there? I’ve given them to you before. I’ve noticed it.” Naruto kept teasing.

“L-Liar! I hate this and you KNOW it! STOP!” Konohamaru demanded.

“Okay.” Naruto shrugged and violently put an end to the wedgie torture by making it an official atomic when he had it over Konohamaru’s head and eyes.

“AAAUGH! I CAN’T SEE! FUUUU~!” Konohamaru flailed around and tried to take weird swings and grabs at Naruto but he couldn’t see him. 

Naruto laughed and held his gut, finding this hilarious… well, that was until Konohamaru got a lucky shot in and nailed Naruto in the crotch with his foot!

BAM! Naruto’s teeth clenched and HIS eyes crossed this time. The pain of that hit made him all tingly for sure!

He grabbed himself and bent over, groaning and wincing as he bit his lip. Perhaps he should have kept a better look out for stuff like that. Tabe looked concerned when he saw Naruto bent over like that, wondering if maybe he had a tummy ache. Of course, it wasn’t his tummy he had hit so perhaps he should have thought things through a bit more.

“AOGUH!” Konohamaru suddenly grunted in pain which made both Tabe and Naruto turn their heads.

The boy had bashed himself into a tree after stumbling about without any clear vision. He groaned and slid down the tree before falling back and landing on his head.

“Owww…” The wedgied brat moaned to himself as he laid there, embarrassed beyond belief.

Naruto and Tabe scrunched up their faces and began laughing. The laughter echoed across the air and reached the ears of the downed Konohamaru, who shook with rage so much that he found himself recovering.

Immediately, he shot to his feet and reached up to his head, trying to carefully pluck the underwear that had wrapped itself over his hair and eyes off his numbskull. Once he finally did that, the undies zipped back to his pants and SNAPPED against his butt, making him jump and yelp. He quickly grabbed at his poor aching buttocks and rubbed it down like it had received a harsh spanking.

“You think you’re so funny huh? Well I’m not laughing!” Konohamaru snapped. He was upset now. “Don’t go making up lies about me either.”

“Well, don’t go talking down to me about how good I am.” Naruto said, shrugging and shaking his head with a confident smirk. “It’s not my fault you’re unaware of how dumb you sound when you brag about yourself. You also get off on pain so if anything you should thank me.”

Konohamaru winced. “I do NOT get off on pain! I hated that.”

“You may hate it but your body likes it.” Naruto countered.

“It does not!” Konohamaru snapped.

“Then why is there a little wet spot on your pants.” Naruto fired back yet again.

“Wha…?” Konohamaru was a bit confused. He then peered down and shrieked like a little girl. He was right! There was a noticeable wet patch on the front of his pants… and it wasn’t pee…!

The boy stuck his hands in between his legs and felt his face flush even redder than before. “N-Naruto… you… youuuu… grrrr!”

“AHAHAHAHA! No smart aleck response for THAT one eh? AHAHAHAHA!” Naruto laughed and held his gut. Truly, he knew Konohamaru had that side to him for a while but man when he acted like a brat why keep it to himself? He deserved that.

Tabe looked on between the two of them and felt himself pondering something. He then smiled and raised his hand.

“OH! I know what we can do to settle this!” Tabe grinned happily.

Both Konohamaru and Naruto turned to face Tabe with a look of confusion on their faces.

“We should set up a fight!”

Naruto and Konohamaru blinked before looking between the two of them and then facing Tabe.

In unison they agreed but pondered the same thing, “Alright… but who fights who?”

--

YOU DECIDE!

Honestly, there’s a lot of ways this story could go. I want to see if I can represent them as much as possible. Or at least hit the ones I think would make for good story progression. Each one of these choices is going to lead to something probably far different than the other so choose wisely.