F-Rank Frank: Chapter 20 (Patreon)

Chapter 20

Frank was dreaming, he knew that. This time there was no darkness surrounding him that he needed to draw away. Instead, he once again found himself in the same dark obsidian hallway lit by torches on both sides of the hallway.

Just like the last time, there were two guards standing before a slight four step staircase that led to an ornate obsidian and gold accented throne, upon which a gorgeous monster of a female sat. Even with grotesquely red eyes, the girl was captivating.

“So you have returned, though you are in far worse condition than the last time.” The demon queen said, as she raised herself from her throne.

To his surprise, Frank found that he couldn’t move. Worse, he found that the way he passed out, on his side on the ground was the exact way he now found himself here in the dreamworld.

Frank could only look on with horror as the demon queen approached.

“A pity, as I had such high hopes for you. Still, this was inevitable, I suppose.” The Demon queen stated, her tone almost sultry as she grabbed Frank’s arm, raised it up slightly.

As the Demon Queen moved, her eyes never looked away from Frank’s. For his part, Frank could only stare back in complete horror at what was transpiring before him. Unable to move, and worse unable to begin breaking away from this nightmarish dreamscape, all Frank could do is stare on in muted horror as the demon still holding Frank’s outstretched arm, opened her mouth widely, revealing rows upon rows of sharp teeth, then chomped.

Sharp sting.

There was a sharp sting, as if a vice was being wrapped around his arm. Then almost immediately a surge of cold liquids began being forced into and through the puncture wound on his arm.

“AHH!” Frank cried, out as his mind was quickly ripped from the dream world, where he was forcefully awakened to see the same box looking hover craft clamping down on his arm and doing something to him.

Frank sat up, or at least tried to sit up as the arm that was being attacked was the one that had been laying on the ground, meaning that in order for Frank to rip his arm free, he would first have to sit up, then begin moving his arm. Just as he began to move, a voice called out from the giant box.

“Relax, immediate first aide relief is being applied.” The voice said in a semi-robotic voice that indicated it was the words of a human that were being modulated. Odd, but something that was to be expected.

Hearing the words, and realizing that while there was a slight burning sensation as cold liquids were being pumped directly into his body, he felt better. Well, it was hard to feel worse, but he could safely say that the cold liquids were having an immediate effect on his body.

“What is going on?” Frank found himself asking, as he began shaking his head.

“This is a meal delivery vessel. As part of the first aid by delivery device compliance act of 45, all delivery drones must be equipped with emergency life saving measures. Up to and including an IV for both hextend and saline solution. You are currently being administered saline solution to help with dehydration.” The device said.

“Oh, thank goodness you were delivering a meal in the area then.” Frank said, still a little woozy, but feeling much better.

“Yes.” Was all the meal delivery unit operator said.

Within ten minutes the entire bag had been emptied into Frank’s arm. At which point the clamp like device that had grabbed his arm began to retract, as did the blood covered needle that had been used to pierce Frank’s arm.

With his arm free of the vice, Frank let out a sigh of relief. Then began to get up.

“Perhaps you could help me make my delivery?” The operator asked.

“Uh, okay?” Frank said, figuring he would likely have to point the drone towards Purgatory where a guard or someone likely ordered delivery.

“Do you know of a Cadet Candidate Frank Fotos who is still in the accusatory stage of his incarceration.” The drone operator said, making sure to stress the fact that Frank had not been officially tried, as he was still waiting for his sentencing when he decided to leave and try this fool’s errand of earning a pardon.

“Um, I’m Frank Fotos.” Frank said, wondering what else could go wrong. Was there an exploding bomb that would be delivered to him? Maybe a bar of soap so he could wash up while in the prison.

“Oh, what a coincidence then. As we have a meal ready to eat that will surely be a tasty treat.” The person piloting the drone said, their words pulling off the jingle with a near perfect diction.

“Okay.” Frank said, not quite knowing what to do as he just stood there.

As he looked a flashing text box appeared on the package, but Frank had no clue how any of this worked. There was clearly something he was supposed to do, but clearly had no clue as this was all new technology and customs compared to what he was used to.

“Just read the order number, the order details, and state confirm receipt afterwards if you would like to receive the meal.”

“Oh, is that all a guy needs to do to eat around here.” Frank said, then getting closer to the box he read the package details. “A number one A, with large fries and a large coke.”

There was a slight pause, as Frank looked on then shaking his head as if he was a moron he replied. “Oh right, the magic phrase. Confirm receipt.”

Chime.

“Order has been confirmed.” The drone speaker stated, as the drone began to drop to the ground, where it dropped a brown paper bag and a large white cup that nearly blinded Frank as to how bright it was with the rays of the sun shining off of it.

“Oh wow, that is blindingly bright.” Frank said, as he twisted his head to the side and then reached out and grabbed the cup that was surprisingly cold to the touch.

“Oh wow, it’s still cold.” Frank said, as he heard something jingle inside. Having heard of screws being loose in drinks down in the slums, Frank grew weary of the sound and pulled off the lid to reveal a dark black drink with weird clear crystals floating in it. “Is this dirty water?”

Haha.

“No it’s a soda.” The voice of the drone spoke. By now enough of a dialog had been had that Frank was moderately certain that the person he was talking to was a female. At least, he hoped it was a female. The fact that they laughed at him would only be worthwhile if it was from a female after all.

“The closest thing I drank to this color was light brown and it gave me the poops for the week. This won’t give me the poops will it?” Frank asked holding the drink and looking at it closely, only to then jump back as he saw part of the drink explode before his eyes. “What is that?”

More melodic laughter.

“That’s carbonation. Do they not have that where you are from?”

“No, we are lucky if we only get a bit of dirt or rust with our water. Let alone this carbonation.” Frank said.

“Oh, so this is your first time drinking a Coke?” She asked.

“Yeah.”

“Then you are going to want to sit down, and tuck your feet under you.”

“Why?”

“If you don’t it just might knock your socks off.”

Looking down, at his feet Frank saw his shoes and tried to remember exactly what socks were.

There was an awkward pause as the view for the drone panned down to reveal Frank’s shoes that were little more than slabs of rubber with multiple holes in them, and there was clearly no socks on.

“Oh…” The girl delivery agent said.

“Already gone, just by holding it.” Frank said, trying to end the awkward moment.

Forced laugh.

With that, Frank decided to get this moment over with and decide to try the odd drink.

Fire, fizzle, pop.

There was an explosion of flavor in his mouth, as his dry tongue felt the cool liquid hit it, then he felt his mouth come to life as flavors that he had never experienced before came to life.

Foam.

He felt his mouth automatically begin to drool from the new liquid. Covering his mouth so the girl couldn’t see him in this awkward state, he tried to regain his composure and almost failed. Finally, he managed to speak, “oh, that is amazing. It’s like my mouth is being zapped to life with flavors.”

Mirthful laughter.

The girl once again laughed, this time it was a real laugh that reminded Frank of ringing bells.

“Now try the food.” The girl said, excitedly.

“Okay, can I ask you to tell me what these are?” Frank said, pulling out golden sticks.

“Those are french-fries, they are amazing to eat.”

“Okay, trusting you.” Frank said, holding up the golden sticks and then biting into them. Once again Frank felt an explosion of flavors as he felt salt, real honest to goodness salt right there on the fry, as if it was some common food, and not a gourmet delicacy.

MMM.

Frank couldn’t contain himself as he hungrily ate the fries by the handful. He ate so fast that they almost felt like glue on the way down, but that was okay as the taste before the glue was priceless.

“That is so good.”

“If you think that’s good, just wait until you try the hamburger.” The girl said.

Looking around Frank only found a wrapped up sandwich that looked odd, as Frank had never seen anything that was quite that shade of blackish brown before.

“I don’t know. It looks kind of weird.” Frank said, holding the sandwich out and wondering why the bread was able to bend. Should bread be able to bend freely like that?

“Just try it.”

Frank paused, and looked from the sandwich to the hovering drone. “I don’t know.”

“For me?” The girl pleaded.

Frank paused, realizing that he already ate more today with just the fries than he would in a whole week. That said, the girl was really nice and she might get angry if he didn’t at least try the odd sandwich, what did she call it, a hamburger?

“Okay,” Frank said. Then pausing for a moment he stared at the burger before letting out a breath of air and biting into the sandwich that practically melted in his mouth.

Then just like the Coke, there was an explosion of flavor in his mouth, but this time it was ten times more intense than before.

Mmm.

Frank opened his eyes and then looked at the camera and was about to open his mouth to say something, but then remembered his mother’s lessons for how to impress girls. Namely, never talk with your mouth full around them. Realizing his almost faux pas, Frank corrected himself and then tried to swallow the food, only to feel a tear of joy swell on his face as it tasted even better going down than it did while in his mouth.

“That was so good.” Frank managed to finally say. As he opened his mouth and was about to take a bite when the female operator spoke.

“Good, well if you are all set, then I guess I will be on my way.”

Hearing that, Frank paused, as he realized that this was his first form of human interaction in a long time. Worse, this would likely be his last form of human interaction until he reached the city.

“Wait,” Frank yelled out, jumping to his feet and almost tackled the drone that had both saved his life and taken the time to talk to him.

Splash.

Only after his mad dash did Frank realize that he had knocked over his cup with the remaining soda, but that didn’t matter. Right now, all that really mattered was being able to talk to someone without going crazy.

“Can you please stay and talk?” Frank asked, a note of desperation in his voice.

“I don’t know if I…” the female operator began to say, but then cut herself off as a second voice could be heard talking in the background. “Actually, I was just given the all clear to talk to you for as long as you’d like.” She said, and Frank could almost hear her smile at that. Or it might have just been Frank’s wishful thinking, but either way he could hear the voice of a beautiful woman talk to him.

“Oh that’s awesome.” Frank said, then sadly he turned to see that in his haste part of his sandwich fell apart and dropped to the ground along with the remains of his drink.

Looking at the mess, Frank could only let out a sigh. “Dang it, oh well.” Frank said, while eating the rest of his sandwich in one large bite, so he wouldn’t lose any more of it. Then reaching down he began to pick up the mess he made. Grabbing his wrappers and empty drink container. Then condensing them all together he put them in a bag, but in his haste he felt one of the clear crystals that came with his drink and was surprised to see that it was actually shaped ice. At least what he figured to be shaped ice. Again, ice had also been a luxury down in the slums, so more often than not, all he could hope for was cold water to drink, with ice in the water being only a luxury that the rich families partook in.

Seeing the ice, Frank let it melt in his hands, as cool liquid pooled on his skin. Then without thinking he began rubbing the ice fragments on the back of his neck to help cool off.

“Is it hot out there?” The female drone operator asked.

“Yeah, you could say that.” Frank said, as he finally finished chewing the last bite of his burger. He felt stuffed, but more importantly he felt like he could go on with is track. Though looking around, Frank looked for a trash bin or something that he could place his litter into. Seeing him search around, the drone operator asked.

“You need anything?”

“Yeah, a place to put my trash.” Frank said, then looking around at the charred husks of bones and debris filled wasteland that surrounded him, Frank couldn’t help but feel awkward at the gesture. “I probably should just throw it down, but I can’t.” Frank said, as he placed the last pieces of trash into the paper bag and then rolled everything up tightly and began to walk towards salvation once more.

“Actually, why don’t you put that here.” The drone operator said, as a latch opened up on top revealing a shoot to put things.

“Okay, thanks.” Frank said, and then looked to visibly relax as he no longer had the added stress of worrying about carrying out his trash with him.

Silence.

There was an odd but semi-comfortable silence that began to settle over the two as Frank walked and the drone operator kept a close but similar pace to Frank.

“So, I have to ask.” The female operator finally began to speak.

“Please.” Frank said, wanting desperately to talk about anything with the beautiful woman. Or at least to hear the voice of someone who Frank imagined to be beautiful.

“Those were some pretty fine dance moves earlier. I have to say, you must have been quite the lady’s man.”

Pausing, Frank felt shock, shame, and horror all at once as he turned to look at the drone. “You saw those?”

“Oh, yeah, and they were good. Like really good.” The female said, taking away a bit of the embarrassment that he felt about having someone see him dance while burning zombies.

“Probably wasn’t my best look. Though to my defense, I was just clasping at straws to find ways to continue pushing on.” Frank said as he continued moving forward.

“If that is what you call clasping at straws, I’d love to see what you do when you have a firm hold of something you want.” The girl said.

With that, Frank paused again, though this time he quickly regained his stride. For a moment, he thought about the words, then rethought about them, then had to ask. “Was that a pickup line?”

“WHAT?! No.” The voice screamed in almost outrage.

“Oh.” Frank said, slightly deflating after hearing her clear indignation at the comment.

Silence.

Finally after a long pause, the girl asked. “What made you think of that as a pickup line?”

With that Frank felt his face blush slightly, as he worked through the best way to say what he was thinking. “I don’t know, it was the whole you’d love to see what I do when I have hold of something I want.”

Ahh-hh.

There was a high-pitched sound followed by a reverberation loop, before the microphone for the drone abruptly cut out. Hearing that, Frank covered his ears for a moment, and then staring at the drone realized that it lost function for a minute.

Frank thought about waiting, but then after a few seconds, the drone just stayed there motionlessly, before Frank decided to continue moving. Especially now that he felt alive with both food, water, and energy.

“Well, I don’t know what happened, but thank you for the meal, and most importantly for the company. I can’t tell you how much that all meant to me.” Frank said, as he gave a wide bow to the camera of the drone. Then smiling slightly to himself, he decided to moonwalk out of the view of the camera.

Only once he was fully away from the still motionless drone did Frank decide to nod to himself before continuing onward.

“I knew it was too good to be true.” Frank muttered to himself, then stopped as he looked up and saw a total of eight spherical drones hovering overhead realizing that they were all apparently recording at least his visuals. And that they likely recorded his comments he would make to himself as well.

This was bad, particularly if the family of Camello was watching as he had spent most of his last hour of consciousness before passing out focusing on going further while cursing at Camello.

Realizing he had already made a fool enough of himself for a lifetime, Frank decided to continue walking. Though every so often, he did take a moment or two to identify particularly large clusters of zombies, where he would find them, and then use his dark matter explosion technique.

“Fireball!” Frank said, as a giant purple flame rose up from the ground. It wasn’t a true fireball, but that didn’t matter as it still seemed to glow with a bright purple light.

Dah-do-dah-da-da-dah!

This time one of the drones overhead began playing the upbeat song that he had also practiced the moves for. Particularly as it was a song that was played at every childhood dance he attended.

With that Frank began mixing the dance moves, using the fluttering foot steps, along with the crazy swimming motions of the Fireball song to really help continue his motion forward, while making this trip at least somewhat enjoyable.

“She said, ‘walk this way.’” Frank stated, and pointed off towards the city to the south east, while a gaggle of huddled zombies all began bursting and combusting into brightly burning flames that seemed to race down both sides of the road that Frank was walking.

“I came, I saw, I conquered.

Or should I say, I saw, I conquered, I came!

Fa’ la’ lah la boogie all day.

Something something then she said, ‘just walk this way.’”

Yeah, after this Frank was fairly certain he was not going to be called up to be a singer in any way shape or form. That said, he felt inspired to continue to show off his dance moves. Especially with how easy they were to perform.

Also, it seemed that this time so long as he continued to dance, the drones overhead were content to continue to play music. Which was a fair enough trade off for Frank.

Frank might look like a dork, but at least he got to pass the time a little more enjoyably by moving to a beat.

As he got closer and the shadow of the large gate seemed to loom larger than life, Frank felt his feet begin to pick up speed, quickly outpacing any music or beats that had served as motivation for him to continue.

Until finally, Frank soon found himself standing safely before the large metal gate that separated the remains of Death Row from civilized society. The sun was close to setting for the second time, showing that he had traveled for nearly a day straight on just one meal and whatever he was able to cultivate along the way.

Frank stood there, and waited.

Nothing happened.

Looking up at the floating orbs, which still appeared to be expanding in number every time he looked, Frank looked to the spheres and asked.

“Do I need to say something? Like confirm receipt?” Frank said, making sure to shout the last part up as high and loudly as he could.

Nothing.

“Okay,” Frank said, then looking at the wall, he saw a number of cracks that he was fairly certain could be used to climb up. “I guess I have to scale my way to freedom.” Frank said, as he sighed and then reaching up to the sides of the walls began climbing his way up and out of the pit of death.