From The Ashes - 035 (Patreon)

[A/N: Took a few days off to recharge my creative batteries as I felt somewhat burnt out. It helped a bit as I kinda just didn't pressure myself to write anything, which made a lot ideas come to my mind, especially for this story as I am very fond of Noah.

I will try and keep a consistent schedule and switch between the stories you like, but I would appreciate it if you could just try to not ask me for chapters as that builds up pressure in me that is in no way helpful for my process.

Naturally, I know that you seldom don't do this, I just mention it to help you get a better understanding of my situation.

Though, as always I welcome questions and comments about my stories from you all as I enjoy seeing you be so engaged with and invested in something I created.

Anyway, I hope that you all are well and that you enjoy my writing!]

Chapter 035 – Sleep

[2012]

Having decided on three concrete objectives, I rose from my resting position in the grass on top of the floating mountain, and with a single step, I appeared on a lifeless planet, dark-blue fog coiling around me before dispersing after I had just drawn on the Space Stone's power to come here.

As far as my eyes could see there was only black stone and grey ash, not a single living being presence appearing in the area that I could cover with my perception through the use of Observation Haki.

The weather was eternally gloomy, it was a dark and almost lightless world with storms ravaging the land.

This was naturally Vormir as I had chosen this abandoned world as my training ground since I could estimate the incredible destruction that I would unleash during my training.

Choosing a direction as I could see some cliffsides on my left a few kilometers away, I made another short 'jump' with the Space Stone to move in front of a sky-high dark cliff that seemed almost perfectly vertical.

An orange flame suddenly flickered in between my brows as if awakening from a slumber.

Following my intentions, the cosmic strength of the Soul Stone then burrowed into my spirit and soul, infiltrating it and enveloping it, bringing with it a pressure that made me grit my teeth.

A sound akin to a blacksmith striking a piece of red-hot iron on the anvil echoed in my mind as part of the stone's energy trembled and started to strike my spirit and soul, tempering it in the most forceful but effective way.

The other part of the stone's energy turned into a gentle stream of warmth that suffused through my spirit and soul, nourishing and healing the damage caused by the tempering.

I didn't use the full force of the Soul Stone's strength to do this since that was only part of the training plan that I had thought up to increase my mastery and strength over Haki.

It was already an incredibly painful process as it was, so any more and I would find it difficult to focus on anything else. Thankfully, my increased mental potential allowed me to multitask, which was why I could combine this 'tempering' process with my other training.

Not hesitating much, I summoned my spiritual energy, coating my arms in a black layer of Armament before placing my palm against the rough rock and unleashing a wave of Emission Haki.

A thunderous explosion was set off as sharp stone fragments flew out like the shrapnels of a grenade, the dark stone wall crumbling in a radius of around two meters.

I had held back massively as I was just testing the strength and penetrative force of the attack to get some parameters to go by.

Taking a few steps to the left, I placed down my palm again as I summoned the same amount of spiritual energy to unleash another wave of Emission, this time though I tried to control it as it left my palm, instead of just letting it ravage the dark cliff.

I had limited success, unfortunately.

Another cracking roar sounded out as the stone wall exploded under the force of my Haki. The diameter though was shorter while the shrapnels seemed to be more numerous and smaller, even if only by a fraction.

Expressionless, I took another few steps to the left and repeated what I had done.

And I failed again. And again. And again.

I remained calm though as my grey eyes flickered with calm determination. I wasn't frustrated or distracted by my failures as I knew that I would succeed eventually.

There was no other possible way how this could end, I knew this without a shadow of a doubt. This wasn't my confidence speaking or my pride, I just knew because I was truly willing to spend the rest of my days training this if necessary.

This unwavering determination was what gave me an unbreakable faith in my success.

I was so immersed and focused on what I was trying to achieve that I didn't even notice the faint aura of the Conquerer's Haki emanating from my body as I continued my training.

Naturally, I was trying to master the concept of Internal Destruction since Marco had not mastered this particular advanced form of the Armament Haki branch.

In fact, Internal Destruction was the only advanced application of Haki that the First Commander of the Whitebeard Pirates had not mastered since his Devil Fruit, combined with the other forms of Haki had already given him the strength to be counted as a top combatant of the One Piece world.

He had some understanding of the technique but Marco's passions lay in the medical field and not combat, so he had not explored the full potential of this advanced form of Haki.

I also suspected that it was this preference of his that disqualified him as a wielder of the Conquerer's Spirit since he was a healer first and foremost, and a warrior second.

Obviously, I was different since exploring my newly-gained strength was what motivated me to live one the most at the moment.

I had promised myself to live because I knew that, that was what she wanted me to do, to live my life to the fullest. But knowing this and being able to internalize it and truly 'live' it, were two very different concepts.

Only days had passed since my arrival in this world and I had not yet forgotten her, nor the sorrow that gnawed at my will to live.

I wasn't yet ready to find someone new or think about the future and any hopes for having my own family and maybe even children.

Those thoughts were too painful to deal with for the moment, so I threw all my thoughts and ambition into advancing my strength, clinging to this objective like it was a life raft.

As such, while I didn't have to be a warrior, I chose to be one. And as a warrior, I naturally wasn't satisfied with this level of Haki mastery, especially since I knew how incredibly lethal Internal Destruction was.

I stayed on Vormir for hours, striking the cliffside while changing and experimenting with the way that I manipulated and controlled my spiritual energy, trying to get a better understanding of it and further my progress in the advanced form of Armament Haki while my soul was constantly being tempered by the cosmic ingot's energy.

When I finally went back to Asgard and my new residence, it was already night and I was prepared to just eat something before going to bed, exhaustion coursing through my system.

The Einherjar would deliver daily meals to the mountain, which was rather nice since I didn't have to waste any time or thought on this. And while the meals had already grown cold since I hadn't picked them up earlier, a bit of blue fire was enough to change that.

Placing the empty baskets back on the small grassy patch at the edge of the floating mountain so that the Einherjar would take them with them when they came by tomorrow, I went to bed.

The bed was a large wooden one, it was robust and honestly rather massive. The wood was of a light colour and it was entirely covered with beautiful Nordic carvings. The beddings were soft and smelled like fresh flowers but even as exhausted as I was, I couldn't fall asleep.

Lying alone in the oversized double bed, the whole cottage quiet except for my shallow breathing, I couldn't shake the feeling of emptiness.

Turning to my side, I gazed at the vacant side of the bed and I could almost see her lying there, memories of the past surging into my mind.

…

Her flaxen blonde hair lay strewn across her delicate back, her light and soft skin illuminated by the moonlight that managed to slip into my room. She lay on her front, her head facing me while she smiled with a faint blush on her cheeks.

Her eyes were closed but she obviously knew that I was looking at her as she was still trying to hide her bare chest with the quilt, though the minute smile on her lips also indicated that she felt secretly happy that I couldn't bring myself to move my eyes away from her.

Opening her eyes, a shy look in them, she whispered gently while the red colour on her cheeks deepened: “Why are you looking at me? Just go to sleep.”

We had been together for a few months now and it had all started when she visited me almost daily after I had gotten shot in the chest, which had almost killed me. She had saved my life, and then she had made it worth living again.

And so, on this night I just blurted it out, telling her how I felt about her for the first time, my heart unable to contain those three magical words any longer.

"I love you."

I said it quietly and calmly without any expectations or implied demands. I said those words with a faint smile, satisfied with the mere knowledge that she knew how I felt about her.

At this moment, I didn't need her to love me back or want to be with me. I was happy just being allowed to love her for who she was and for what she had done for me.

Her eyes widened in shock as she heard those words, her lips parting as she failed to answer while a tremor went through her lithe form. Moisture began to gather in her eyes and then she just cried silent tears, overwhelmed by my sudden revelation.

I didn't really hesitate as I reached over with my arms and pulled her into my embrace, tears still escaping her eyes as she clung to me with all her strength.

I wasn't sure how long she cried like this but when she finally stopped after having fallen asleep while curled up in my arms, I knew that she had become my home. At peace, I followed her example as I entered the land of dreams, her scent lingering in my nose.

I didn't know it at this time but she hadn't just saved me from a pit of loneliness that had slowly been devouring me, I had also saved her.

…

Coming to myself, my hand brushed over the cold sheets and the empty side of the bed, her scent long gone. Unspeakable agony tore at my heart, causing every breath that I took to be accompanied by a stabbing pain as my lungs seemed to contract uncontrollably.

I tried to endure it, pushing away the memories of the past, but it seemed to be a futile effort.

Eventually, I just quietly left the bed like I had done the last few nights, not turning around as I stepped out of the room and even left the house.

Coming to a stop on a clearing next to the house, I simply gave way to my inner fire as I turned into a mythical avian that easily trumped the size of the whole cottage.

Curling up my blazing form, my massive flaming wings moved as my fiery form seemed to shift and change. In the end, nothing but a cocoon of blue fire remained as I finally managed to gain a moment of peace and rest.