Non-Canon (Maybe?) Omake -- Girl's only chat. (Patreon)

Grimm_Queen has Joined the chat!

I’m_Not_Actually_Blue: Hey, Salem finally joined!

Foxy_Momma: Welcome! I’m glad you finally came around.

She_Who_Invites: Welcome.

Spear_Witch: Good to see you join.

Oni_A_Mother: Hello!

Loyal_Knight: Greetings.

Mother_of_the_Devil: Welcome to our secret group chat!

Legs_For_Days: Welcome.

Legs_For_Days: Dammit Wilhelm.

Legs_For_Days has left the chat!

Lady_of_Light has joined the chat!

Lady_of_Light: There.

I’m_Not_Actually_Blue: Did Wilhelm change your username again?

Lady_of_Light: Of course, who else would do so? I foolishly believed him when he said he wished to ‘update’ my device.

Grimm_Queen: Thank you for the invitation. I admit, I am still surprised by the acceptance into this group. I did not think that a group of women vying for the attention of one man would be so welcoming.

Mother_of_The_Devil: For a lot of us, it’s not strange for a powerful person to have a harem. Though I was the only one with previous experience and it wasn’t nearly as open and welcoming as this one has been.

I’m_Not_Actually_Blue: I just like having a big family!

Foxy_Momma: You’re so adorable! Whoever is closest to her, give her a big hug for me.

Oni_A_Mother: Will do!

Grimm_Queen: I noticed you said ‘person’ when mentioning harems. Is that intentionally?

Mother_of_The_Devil: Oh yes. While most supernatural societies reflect human society in that they’re male dominated, there are certainly predominant women with their own harems. If I wanted to, I could have my own without anyone even raising an eyebrow down in the underworld.

Loyal_Knight: Would it not be more difficult to have relations with a large group of men as opposed to the opposite?

Mother_of_The_Devil: Who said they all have to be men?

Loyal_Knight: How….lewd.

Spear_Witch: Little lass is blushing now.

Loyal_Knight: Don’t tell everyone that!

Foxy_Momma: Now I’m curious. How many of us here swing both ways?

Mother_of_The_Devil: Is this your subtle way of trying to confirm for yourself?

Foxy_Momma: Oh dear, if I was asking for myself, I would not be subtle~

Mother_of_The_Devil: Fair enough. As much as I enjoy a man in bed, a woman just scratches a different kind of ich.”

Spear_Witch: I have laid with women in the past. I would not mind the occasional tryst as long as our shared interest is involved. However, I prefer a man inside of me over a woman.”

I’m_not_Actually_Blue: I don’t know! I’ve never had sex with a girl before!

Oni_A_Mother: I believe I am the same, preferring Master’s touch only. But the idea to share on occasion is not repulsive.

Loyal_Knight: I have come to understand that I find both genders attractive, but prefer a relationship with a man.

Lady_of_Light: I have not given any consideration to anyone beyond Wilhelm for relations. However, if such a thing were to change in the future, I believe the ones present would be acceptable.

Foxy_Momma: If you ever want to experiment, feel free to let me know~ Wilhelm isn’t the only one to admire those long legs of yours.

She_Who_Invites: Down, you horny fox.

Foxy_Momma: That invitation is extended to you too Lady Izanami. And everyone else for that matter. I think Wilhelm has excellent taste and I would absolutely love to get better acquainted.

She_Who_Invites: Noted. And I am the same as most of us, it seems. I don’t mind either gender, but I prefer a man in most situations.

Grimm_Queen: This is not what I expected when I joined this group.

Foxy_Momma: What did you expect?

Grimm_Queen: The subtle backhanded insults, the attempts at subterfuge and trying to gain advantage over other members of the Harem. Perhaps vying and competing for Wilhelm’s affection at every opportunity.

Mother_of_The_Devil: Take it from someone who did experience that for centuries. It’s much too exhausting and this is much more fun.

Spear_Witch: I would not have accepted such a situation.

Foxy_Momma: Double for me. I would not have allowed Kunou to be raised around that kind of unhealthy environment. I don’t know how you handled it, Venelana.

Mother_of_The_Devil: Oh, everyone learned very quickly that my children were not part of their games. Some had to learn the lesson the hard way.

Loyal_Knight: I believe I am of a similar sentiment. I would stepped away from this relationship if there was consistent infighting.

Lady_of_Light: I would have simply removed any volatile elements.

I’m_Not_Actually_Blue: That sounds so sad. I like it better when we all get along and I don’t mind sharing with everyone!

Grimm_Queen: I see….

Grimm_Queen: And what is the purpose of this ‘chat’ then?

I’m_Not_Actually_Blue: To keep in touch!

Foxy_Momma: Or really talk about anything. An hour ago, we were talking about our favorite songs. And the other day it was about vacation spots this summer.

Loyal_Knight: It is also a good method to ask for assistance if required.

Foxy_Momma: But honestly, it was created for one original purpose in mind.

Grimm_Queen: And what would that be?

She_Who_Invites: Wilhelm.

Grimm_Queen: Yes? That is the reason we have gathered, is it not?

Loyal_Knight: No. She means it’s to look after Wilhelm.

Spear_Witch: Our lover has a habit of finding trouble.

Lady_of_Light: Either by his hand or not.

I’m_Not_Actually_Blue: If there’s something happening, he’s either the cause of it or involved in some way.

Mother_Of_The_Devil: Never a dull moment with my precious Grandson. Like the time he tracked down Jack the Ripper in another world just so he could have a climatic sword fight at night on the rooftops of London? It turned out that he was a demon in disguise…..

She_Who_Invites: I will still point out the time he facilitated multiple invasions of the local afterlife of another world he took me to.

Loyal_Knight: Or the time he found an alternate version of me participating in the Fourth Grail War and proceeded to get into a fist fight with Lancelot after removing his Mad Enhancement while proclaiming himself the Rightful Queen of Camelotand elaborating in detail by what that actually means. Explicit detail.

Oni_A_Mother: Master also found another Grail War that had a despicable Oni participating. He took me there for our anniversary. It did not end well, but it was a lovely date.

Spear_Witch: If I recall, was that the one where his Grandfather kicked him out of the world-line?

Oni_A_Mother: No that was….another one.

Grimm_Queen: ……

Spear_Witch: Yes, and the time he brought me to see that ‘Chaldea’. He mistook the local version of myself as his and proceeded to grope her without regard. It caused a large brawl in the kitchens that escalated to involve the majority of the Heroic Spirits summoned.

Foxy_Momma: Didn’t that also end with both of you in his bed?

Spear_Witch: Yes it did.

Grimm_Queen: I am starting to understand the necessity.

I’m_Not_Actually_Blue: Oh, tell her about the Dragons!

Lady_Of_Light: I was asked by Akatosh that we not mention that anymore.

Grimm_Queen: And this Akatosh is….?

Lady_Of_Light: Similar to me, but his sphere is over the domain of Time and older than the concept itself. Also the creator of all Dragons as they are parts of his soul.

Grimm_Queen: What could possible cause such a being to make that request?

Foxy_Momma: I only heard bits and pieces, but something about forced Dragon fighting pits?

I’m_Not_Actually_Blue: We learned that 47 Trolls can take down a dragon if it can’t fly away.

Loyal_Knight: And the spiders…..Rin still has nightmares.

I’m_Not_Actually_Blue: Yeah, the spiders. That poor dragon. I think that’s when everyone realized they went too far….

Grimm_Queen: I am genuinely horrified to even begin questing this and I make horrendous monsters for entertainment.

Lady_Of_Light: As I said, do not mention it anymore.

Grimm_Queen: What exactly did I sign up for?

Mother_Of_The_Devil: Unconditional love and affection with an unhealthy dose of madness and mayhem?

Foxy_Momma: Sounds about right.

Loyal_Knight: Very accurate.

Oni_A_Mother: Master is very mischievous.

Spear_Witch: It makes life interesting.

Lady_Of_Light Continuous Exasperation.

Grimm_Queen: And there are no regrets with how things turned out?

I’m_Not_Actually_Blue: Nope!

She_Who_Invites: No.

Foxy_Momma: Absolutely not.

Oni_A_Mother: I am happy beyond words.

Loyal_Knight: I have no complaints.

Spear_Witch: This Scáthach is content.

Lady_Of_Light: I would not have him any other way.

Grimm_Queen: It seems I have much to look forward to then.

Spear_Witch: Speaking of, where is my student now? He’s due for some instance of trouble any day.

Lady_Of_Light: He visited some hours ago, but I know not where he went.

Foxy_Momma: Don’t worry I got him here. He fell asleep with his head on my lap.

I’m_Not_Actually_Blue: Awww, send a picture.

Foxy_Momma: [Picture]

Oni_A_Mother: I’m saving that one.

Mother_Of_The_Devil: So cute~

Grimm_Queen: He has asked me for this before. Is it a common occurrence?

Spear_Witch: Yes, I let him lay his head upon my thigh as a reward.

Loyal_Knight: He also asks me often.

Oni_A_Mother: Master loves a lap pillow~

Grimm_Queen: I will make a note of it then. Is there anything else I should be aware of? What does he enjoy?

Foxy_Momma: This [Picture]

Loyal_Knight: Yasaka!

Spear_Witch: I suppose he is awake now.

She_Who_Invites: Is it another lewd picture?

I’m_not_Actually_Blue: lewd.

She_Who_Invites: Must you post these? I haven’t done anything like that yet and now I already know what he looks like down there.

Oni_A_Mother: She’s giving Master a ‘hand’.

Lady_Of_Light: I have already learned not to view any pictures she sends without waiting for everyone else.

Mother_Of_The_Devil: I almost opened it up. I’m a charity function. That would have been an awkward conversation to have with those around me.

Foxy_Momma: Ufufufu

Grimm_Queen: ….should I assume this is normal behavior?

I’m_Not_Actually_Blue: Oh, I forgot about Salem. She only just joined, woops.

Foxy_Momma: I forgot we had someone new here. Sorry for not giving you a warning.

She_Who_Invites: And I don’t get this supposed warning?

Foxy_Momma: You already know what I’m about.

She_Who_Invites: …..I’m annoyed that this is a valid answer.

Grimm_Queen: I’m not upset. It’s not as if it’s my first time seeing his member.

Loyal_Knight: Oh my…

I’m_Not_Actually_Blue: Damn Salem!

Spear_Witch: I believe you will fit in around here well.