Tutorial Rewrite 61 (Patreon)

The floor shifts beneath my feet and I’m back in the horrible WHITE lobby, but my eyes are staring at the screen in front of me.

<To repay your debt,

your inventory has been sold

for 1 899 points.>

<Current debt:

11 774 points.>

My debt is even worse now. So, in other words, beating this floor awarded me exactly nothing, huh? I just went deeper in debt? Right? Is that the situation? Any chance I could get a bank statement on the situation here? Really, I don’t know about you, but this whole we-don’t-like-you-so-go-into-debt system feels a bit rigged. I mean, if you liked me, I would’ve been rich by now! Imagine that, huh? If every god that disliked me liked me instead, I would’ve had enough points to buy the whole damn shop!

This is a travesty. I can’t believe this. Then again, it’s not like being in debt has any effect outside of the shop, so I think it’s fine if the gods don’t like me as much as they—

<The God of Duels

thanks the God of Combat

after a long and personal discussion.>

<The God of Combat has come to a decision.>

<The Goddess of Honour is in favour.>

<The God of Adventure is in favour.>

<The Goddess of Solitude is in favour.>

<The God of Cruelty is in favour.>

<The God of Wild is in favour.>

<The Goddess of Children is in favour.>

<...>

<The God of Cowardice is in opposition.>

<The Goddess of Want is in opposition.>

<22 to 2

in favour.>

<The God of Combat

has decided with the support of

22 backing Gods that Hell Challenger

Lee Ho-Jae

will be stripped of the blessings that

the God of Combat has so graciously given him.

Reasoning:

Hell Challenger Lee Ho-Jae

does not appear to appreciate or

require them in his further challenging

of the Hell Difficulty Tutorial.>

Uh… Huh?...

H-, hang on just a moment. If I may ask, and if it isn’t too offensive for your divine pallets, I have just one question.

What the fuck?

There is so much wrong with this that I don’t even know where to start, but I guess the easiest place is…

Hey, Cruelty. How come if you take interest in me, that you still want to agree with all of these sourpusses and go against me, huh? We may not agree on a lot of things, and I personally don’t think you should like me at all since I’m such a kind and virtuous person, but is that any reason for you to go and side with all of these dumbos? I mean, really now. Coward and Want got the hint, so why not you?

<The God of Cruelty

attests that He enjoys all

forms of cruelty, be they committed

or endured.>

…Uhuh. So you’re the ultimate switch? Right. Got it.

Secondly, and maybe finally, what the heck do you mean when you say blessings? I have been given nothing by you! You haven’t even taken interest in me, mr fight-right-or-die! How am I supposed to be stripped of a blessing I don’t have? Hm? Riddle me that, you supposed god.

Bleh. Yeah, of course I don’t require blessings, you haven’t given me any. Stupid god…

So, anyways. I got a lot of skills this floor, so I think I’d do best to check on the—

Hm. Hm? Hm…

Hu—h. Huh. Huh…

If I’m not seeing things wrong, and assuming I didn’t court lady number 2, there’s a fair chance that, um, again assuming I’m not currently experiencing hypnosis, that, ah, uh…

All my combat skills are gone?

Intermediate Spear Arts level 2: gone.

Intermediate Knife Arts level 3: gone.

Intermediate Axe Arts level 1: gone.

Intermediate Shieldwork level 4: gone.

Intermediate Swordsmanship Level 5: gone.

All of them. I’ve still got Maul and Eviscerate and my claws and fangs, but anything pertaining to a weapon is just… gone.

…So, in other words, um… Are these the supposed blessings the god of combat had supposedly given me? Huh. Um…

Okay, honestly, I’m not especially upset at losing these skills in particular, I haven’t used them in a while and I don’t think I need them much anyways since all my weapons will just be automatically sold anyways, but…

There’s an insinuation here that I don’t like. Namely, these skills, whatever they are, come directly from some god or another. As, like, a blessing, I suppose? Or something.

I—I just…

Maybe I should have figured this out earlier, it makes absolute sense considering the way, well, everything is formatted around here, but somehow, someway, the system I have, the skills I get from it, the levels it gives me, the entire tutorial itself… Is most likely made from the powers of these gods. They could absolutely do a vote to just… kill me.

For some of them, I’m basically just a plaything. For others, from what I can see, they’re just hate-watching me. And, sure, being hate-watched is nothing new for me, but the difference here is that those losers who sent me hate-mail and angry PMs on Earth didn’t actually hold much power over me. They couldn’t just press a button and have me explode into confetti on the spot. And, sure, maybe these gods can’t do that either, but if they band together, and hold some stupid democratic vote on it…

There wouldn’t be a thing I could do to stop it.

And that wouldn’t be too bad if these supposed gods actually acted like honest-to-God divine creatures. If they were aloof and didn’t care for mortal quarrels and everything like that, then they wouldn’t care what I did because no matter what, I would still just be a pathetic foolish mortal. But as it is, right now, I’m stuck in some sort of half-greek pantheon I don’t know about you, but I would not want to meet Zeus personally.

This is not a good situation, but there’s also nothing I can do about it.

Frankly, I’m starting to think that if the gods really wanted me dead, then I’d already be floating down the river Styx in a one-piece and cement floaties. But I’m not. The worst they can do, from what I can see, is to strip me of my skills. And sure, that’s already bad enough, but the god of combat couldn’t just do that as he pleased. He needed the other gods to concur with him, sure, but he also needed a reason. In this case, it was because I didn’t appreciate them, and he didn’t think I’d need them in the future. And maybe he’s right about that.

Either way, they can’t do this stuff out of nowhere and for no reason. The god of keeping-me-alive can’t suddenly decide to strip me of all my tolerances because, well, I’m using those! And diligently, too.

As weird as it is to think, at least within the walls of this tutorial, the gods can’t just act however they please. They can try, but they need to have a solid reasoning and backing behind whatever they do.

I am not receiving power from a single human-acting god.

I am getting it from many.

And some of those gods happen to understand the sound logic and reasoning in why I act as I do, and even if one of those gods apparently really likes watching me suffer, the other two will at least try to protect me. Hm. There’s gotta be some way of using this to my advantage, right?

I just know there is.

But, for now, since there isn’t much to do about this whole thing—I certainly can’t alter my winning playstyle—I guess I’d better just put it to the side.

The next floor… That's the one Moleman warned me about, right? Specifically, about how the boss was supposedly unbeatable. In my personal opinion, there’s no such thing as a truly unbeatable boss, just bad players. I mean, yeah, some bosses are invincible during certain stages of their battle, but that’s always temporary. A boss, no matter how seemingly invincible, will always be beatable somehow, even if it is only inside a cutscene.

Minotaur…

Yeah, I’ve gotta beat him. Ain’t no way I’m just letting a perfectly fine pelt-plus-meat combo slip out of my grip simply because the entire tutorial is filled with cowards.

That said, I haven’t really had time to check the time in a while. How long is it until the floor opens?

<Top—Status—Community>

<06:59:55

Day 112>

<The fifth attempt will begin in

8:18:00:05>

<The fifth floor will open in

23:47:31>

112 days have already passed, huh? Somehow, it feels like it’s been both way longer and way shorter than that. I guess time really does move fast and-or slow when you’re in constant life-and-death situations.