Fate/Fool Chapter 1 (Patreon)

A series of tapping rang out as my eldritch-looking patron typed on his keyboard with tentacle-ended hands. While I silently sat in my DMV-level of comfort chair as I processed all the information going on in my head.

'I died... And even worse, I died to such an embarrassing damned way.' I thought with a small flush entering my cheek.

'Join the mile-high club they said... It will be fun they said.' Until the autopilot on the plane they rented, went into a meltdown and shorting out the propeller's engine so we died in the plane crash with our conjoined bodies becoming a red smear.

'But dear gods she was worth it at least.' I thought finally trying to get some humour out as I waited for my patron to reincarnation to sort out my details.

"Alright, Jake Bariss-985672852321. You died in such a way that one of the primal Jakes actually broke a planet as he was drinking some exotic soda and the fizz made from a galaxy's birth made him snort too hard. Anyway so you have been slotted for a premium reincarnation and your landing destination was changed." He spoke while printing out a file.

While I had one thought actually. "Uhh what was the original destination?" I asked with some curiosity.

My Patron gave me an alien and utterly unerving blank stare before he answered bluntly. "Due to your natural spatial attribute you would be tossed into a universe you do not know that is filled with eldritch entities that people contract with, in order to fight off the native Cyrptids and SCP-like beings that haunt the mortal realm."

With that blank explanation made. I sent a prayer of thanks to the Jake who saved me from the fate of tentacle waifus. And even as I somehow felt someone giving me a beaming grin and a thumbs up inside of my own head as though in reply of my prayer my patron continued speaking.

"Instead, due to your sponsors meddling you will be reincarnated in the base Nasuverse. With a note saying that Goetia isn't active. While for your base reincarnation you were to be made to follow the Fool's Pathway with your great spatial and eldritch connection... But your sponsor has also got you another cheat for making him laugh so hard." He finished and then his form blurred and all I knew was pain.

As the tentacle ladded figure had teleported behind me and using its tentacles it bound my body up and within three seconds it had plucked out my eyes then I could feel... With entirely too damned much feeling how his slime-covered tentacles slipped two new eyes into my empty sockets before I felt an alien feeling as my eyes stopped bleeding and the eyes more properly settled into my skull.

The moment he moved away I swung the back of my elbow at him but my only contact was a hissing gurgle of laughter entering my ears as he teleported back into his seat and as I looked at him with my new eyes I heard the sound of the sea in my ears and my vision went darker with it feeling like waves were slapping into my body.

"Hmm. The Six Eyes are working... Cover your eyes before I drive you mad and get killed by another Jake." He said tossing a hair band at my face that snapped over my eyes but I could still partially see through it but no longer was I seeing the eldritch truth of what he was.

The monster then hummed as he picked up a vial filled with glowing essence that made my eyes even covered up burn and then he said. "Catch." And tossed the vial into my hands.

But even as I instinctively caught the vial, I saw out of the corner of my eyes the eldritch being. Type a couple of types before with a tap with finality tap the enter key, and without a split second to react. I could feel myself being sucked into the portal that formed behind me.

Even as rainbow light covered my form as I was being transferred through dimensions I focused on the vial in my hands and recalled how it was supposed to be a Pathway from the Lord of Mysteries universe... And without any hesitation, I pulled the cap off the vial and downed it while shuddering at the vile taste within.

And then my mind was filled with the eldritch truth as the Fool Pathway's gifted knowledge filled my mind. Downloading its power, essence and abilities entering my mind.

The Fool Pathway was actually one of the least combat-focused Pathways out of the various Pathways as the first Sequence in the 9th Level Sequence Seer only had various divination abilities until they hit the seventh level.

'So that's why they gave me the Six Eyes from Gojo Satoru... This pathway won't have methods of combat for a good long while.' I thought somewhat blankly before with a grunt my rainbow ride finished and with a thud, I was tossed out of the portal and landed on soft grass.

As though in calling of my arrival I heard a loud chiming noise and I looked up into the cloudy sky above me and said with utter despair. "Oh no... I have been isekaied to Great Britain."

The loud chiming noise was from the large bell tower that was Great Ben ringing whatever British time it was now while I considered what I needed to do to get a new life before a loud zipper noise rang out and I flinched as a backpack was dropped on my head with a letter strapped to it.

I quickly ripped open the letter to read the chicken scratch of writing that my supposed sponsor had sent. [Here is a bag filled with money, your magic circuits were already activated and made when the Fool Pathway was activated in your body. Also, I got you entry into the clock tower so you can study magic!] I looked and seeing the paperwork I saw that I was registered for Modern Magecraft under the tutelage of Lord El-Melloi II.

'Lord El-Melloi II... That was the name Waver Velvet took after he returned to the clock tower after the Holy Grail War in Fate Zero.' I thought and then I took a breath as this was a decent choice as I was painfully aware that London was dangerous as fucking hell with the mad Magi running around killing people for their experiments.

"Whelp time to go back to school I guess." I muttered as I stood up and threw the backpack over my back while I looked through my blindfold and followed the directions on the back of the letter on how to join the Clocktower as I was apparently registered as a new blood with mystic eyes that was to be taught of the world.

'Of course the Clocktower is beneath the British Museum...' I thought wryly and then I peaked under my blindfold to see what it was like using the Six Eyes without them being covered and then quickly covered them back up as the overwhelming mental information threatened to overload my mind as a headache filled my head I saw... Way too much stuff including magical barriers in the distance to what may have been ghosts or something strolling around the old buildings surrounding me.