Fire and Ice (Patreon)

I was a late-ish bloomer sexually because of being raised in a catholic family a in a puritanical, white picket fence town. I was really afraid of my sexuality. I started to figure things out in college but was too afraid to act on feelings I was curious about in the non-binary, female or trans communities.  Dating and intimacy was always something I put on the back burner. I knew things would work out if I just kept doing the things I loved, I never chased love or went out of my way to date and If I did, it always felt forced. My mom always told me "When you know you know" and I just left my romantic fate to the universe. I met my current significant other my junior year of college and I knew right away he was the one, which scared me a little, because I felt like there was so much left I wanted to experience. He has a really healthy and open mind when it comes to sex and I feel like Ive grown with him more than I ever could if I had decided to stay single. We have been together 7 years and many pillow talk sessions have helped me break down the barriers that were stopping me from really enjoying sexy time as well as helping me work through the guilt and shame I associated with the subject. I started this sexy illustration project as a way of exploring my sexual identity with my partner and hopefully embolden others to do the same, free of judgement. Sex should be fun and there is no need for shame or guilt. 

A few years ago I started to wonder if I was Bi/pan-sexual. I had queer friends in college but none of them outwardly identified as bi or pan and I was terrified of being the only one. I never acted on those feelings out of fear and ended up meeting the love of my life before I could really experiment. For that reason, I couldn't really Identify with any category, despite what online quizzes tell me, but I know that I really enjoy fantasizing about it and am happy exploring these feelings with my partner through my artwork.  I don't think it matters when or how you reach sexual enlightenment, or if you fit into a category, as long as you are working toward facing your fears, being honest with yourself and being unapologetic about who you are.