ALL EXCLUSIVE AUDIOS, RULES, SCHEDULE AND STORIES [MAY 2024] (New Patrons, Click Here~!) (Patreon)

[Scroll to the end of the post to see a list with links to every exclusive audio available to Patrons at the 'Dreamy Supporter' tier~]

Happy May~!

I got so sick of wrestling with photoshop each month I dug deep into my administrative roots and did the schedule, story ideas, and rules in a spreadsheet instead. It looks so ugly~! :< I like making things look pretty for you all~

Hopefully the information is a bit easier to digest this way, would love to know what you think~

I am not sure about the sitcom audio. I don't know why. I don't... Look I am going to try and we'll see what happens okay~??

As ALWAYS, thank you for being here and helping me create lots of fun audios for you all. You just being here, reading this silly little paragraph, makes such a difference to me and I'm honoured you like what I make~! You're incredible, thank you again~

Re: the rules - There's no official warning or strike system; I just block Patrons who are stressing me out. I hate moderating people, please consider me reaching out with any kind of warning as something extreemly stressful.

Thank you for reading~! Here is the current masterlist of every exclusive audio story on my Patreon~! Please don't forget audios are also separated into collections now!

Current Audio Series!

The Crystal Garden Adventure! Which Hireling Will You Take?  - 32 min
Previewed on YouTube? It will be on May 2nd
Synopsis: You're a Spell Sword on an important quest from your mentor, and you must travel to the fabled Crystal Garden to complete it. You've narrowed your prospective hirelings down to two women, the first of which is Chloe! You meet her at a local Bazaar, and she does her best to promote her skills while helping you shop for the journey. She also has something to say about your other prospect, a Bardic student.

Last Completed Exclusive Audio Series:

By Faith and Fangs! The Church Forces You to Work With a Thirsty Vampire Girl! - 1 Hour 20 Min
Previewed on YouTube? Yes, click here to see
Synopsis: You're on a holy mission to investigate a disturbing phenomenon in a small town at the far reaches of the Empire. There’s a contact with more information who will meet you there, but you’re shocked to learn she’s a Vampire! What are you investigating together? And why is a Vampire working with the Church?

Completed Exclusive Audios SERIES (Or 20min+ stories) Master List Current As of May 1st, 2024:

(Listed from newest to oldest, scroll further for shorter ‘one-shot’ audios)

Picking a Royal Bride!  - 1 hour
Previewed on YouTube? Yes, click here to see
Synopsis: As the heir to a powerful kingdom, you must choose between two (or three?) potential brides... A vampire and a demon~!

Saving the Empress With a Long Lost (Flirty~) Thief - 40min
Previewed on YouTube? Yes, click here to see
Synopsis: Finding a thief gleefully looting items from the royal art gallery is bad, but her brazen lies and flirtations after the fact are somehow worse. You're charged with guarding the palace and keeping the Empress safe... However, the thief girl promises to reveal a clever forgery she found in the gallery during her looting. Fortunately, she's telling you the truth. Unfortunately, the two of you uncover a plot to kill the Empress in the process...

The Modern Mafia Romance - 55min
Previewed on YouTube? Yes, click here to see
Synopsis: Being an underboss for a criminal organization has made you a  confident gunslinger who lives fast and goes through relationships  faster. But frequent visits to a local business (and the cute but  grim-humoured manager who works there) have inspired you to buy it  outright. The problem is, your purchase has tipped your hand to a rival  mafia, and they pay you a visit. Can you turn it into an opportunity to  disappear and get close to your crush?

Rival Diplomats and the Fruit of Fate! - 45min
Previewed on YouTube? Yes, click here to see
Synopsis: You’re an experienced envoy from the Kestrel noble house with a  delicate mission. A powerful, long-lost magic fruit has resurfaced on  the very border that divides your kingdom from its rival. Disputes over  rightful ownership have already claimed lives, and the Empress’s decree  is clear: a resolution must be negotiated before the next full moon~

Your Ex-mentor Tries to Corrupt Your Paladin Ways! - 38min
Previewed on YouTube? Yes, click here to see
Synopsis: A corrupted paladin mentor you’ve long adored tests your  commitment to your knightly code in this fantasy ASMR RP! She’s just  returned from her holy mission for the church and needs to see you in  private… Are you happy here, serving your order so diligently? Don’t you  ever want more?

A Necromancer’s Tale in the Cthulhu Mushroom Forest - 1 hour
Previewed on YouTube? Yes, click here to see
Synopsis: You’re a newly graduated Necromancer tasked with supervising a  special archaeological dig site for its financier, your aunt. The lead  archaeologist takes a liking to you, as does her sister; a slightly mad  oracle. However, the dig site itself is strange, deep within an  enchanted mushroom forest. And something about the relic you’re  unearthing seems unnatural and dark.

Exclusive Audio One Shot - The Necromantic (Romantic?) Dungeon - 30min
Previewed on YouTube? Yes, click here to see
Synopsis: Your Necromancer friend invites you to explore an ancient  necromancer dungeon filled with treasure, plants, and crystals. She  confesses her feelings for you, and the two of you clear the dangerous  but peaceful dungeon as a new couple, finding loot along the way.

The Vampire’s Request - 46min
Previewed on YouTube? Yes, click here to see
Synopsis: You’re a Mage Smith, a crafter of magical items. You’re also  one of the best in the world! But when a short-tempered Vampire steals  into your room at night to force you to make something for her, it comes  as a shock. After all, you live in Silvergate, the safest city in the  Empire. What’s going on?

The Crown’s Devotion - 51min
Previewed on YouTube? Yes, click here to see
Synopsis: When a nobleman down on her luck hires you to escort her to  the edge of the border with no guards or plan to return, you quickly  sense something is amiss. What is she hiding from you? Can you trust her  intentions?

The Haunted Garden - 40min
Previewed on YouTube? Yes, click here to see
Synopsis: When you’re hired to de-haunt the garden of a rich abandoned  manor, you find the ghost protecting it isn’t nearly as deadly as she  seems. Can your gentle approach to dealing with the supernatural win her  trust? Do you have the skills to help her?

The Noble Rivals - 40min
Previewed on YouTube? Yes, and it was very popular
Synopsis: The Empress calls on you to rule on an issue of succession for  a minor noble house that suffered the sudden loss of its King. The only  problem is that a woman from a rival noble house has also been assigned  to issue a ruling alongside you. After all, if two enemies like you can  agree on who should rule no one will question the decision.

The Legacy of Keres - 50min (story heavy)
Previewed on YouTube? Yes, click here to see
Synopsis: After leaving the church, your lover, and your life as a mage  scholar behind; you travel south to the ocean and find peace. But years  later a member of your former church started a pilgrimage to find you.  And she brings a painful, dangerous reminder of your past.

Druid of the Glade and the Noble Ghost - 1hour
Previewed on YouTube? Yes, click here to see
Synopsis: You are the Noble Ghost, a famous rogue who was locked up  after stealing from too many rich nobles. But one day, a beautiful druid  visits your cell. She begs for your help to save her ancestral glade,  and even has the authority to take you from your prison! But how is a  city-wise thief like you supposed to help a Druid save her land?

Making a Deal with a Demon: 3 Demon Girls and Their Offers + Endings - 1hour 30min
Previewed on YouTube? Yes, and it was very popular
Also, one demon offer was posted to YouTube as a complete audio
Synopsis: You’re fated to be the most powerful mage in a generation. But  each night you’re greeted by a different demon girl, each with their  own offer on how to help you and themselves. Each girl has an audio with  her offer, and then an audio with her ending, assuming you took her  deal. The length of each ending was determined by community vote.

Your Vampire Patron Longs for You - 46min
Previewed on YouTube? Yes, click here to see
Synopsis: When a wealthy writer offers to pay you to be her muse, you  accept and leave your life behind. But one day you stop at a graveyard  and everything changes once you discover what’s hidden underneath it…

The Loanshark and the Necromancer - 46min
Previewed on YouTube? No
Synopsis: You’re a Necromancer in debt to a bossy loan shark. When her  patience runs thin, she decides to take payment out you in trade. But  things get very complicated between you two, and her business becomes  very dangerous…

The Love Letter and the Bard - 28min
Previewed on YouTube? No
Synopsis: A magical love letter finds you in the middle of nowhere, was  it intended for you? Finding its author means you must take centre  stage…

The Paladin and the Portrait - 55min
Previewed on YouTube? Yes, click here to see
Synopsis: You’re the favourite mercenary of a rich, mysterious  noblewoman in the middle of an uprising. But when she asks you to reward  yourself with something from her magic treasure room, a portrait of a  beautiful girl comes to life, begging you for help.

Warlock Carriage Romance - 37min
Previewed on YouTube? Yes, click here to see
Synopsis: After graciously using your Warlock magic to help a lost  noblewoman get home, she wakes up flirty and affectionate in this audio  ASMR RP! But all the flirty comments are out of character for her, she  feels so strongly about you. And so quickly… Stop the carriage! Did you  cast a spell on her?

Completed ONE SHOT (shorter) Exclusive Audios Master List Current As of December 1, 2023:

(Listed  from newest to oldest, some of these are very old and do not have a  synopsis available. But I have left personal notes on a few of them.)

The Intoxicated Vampire - 7min
Synopsis: You leave the tavern with the rest of the bitter revellers  during the once-a-year love festival, but a Vampire takes a liking to  you…~

Ghost Story in a Haunted Cabin - 12min

Happy Halloween! The Werewolf Audio! - 15min

The Vampire Tax Collector - 17min
A personal favourite of mine, very silly.

The Library at the End of the World: Let’s Read the Book of Your Life! - 16min
This one was previewed on YouTube because I was very happy with it. I wrote it during a difficult time and finishing it made me feel a bit better.

How Would I Haunt You? Let Me Count the Ways… - 11min

Choosing the Cleric - 12min

The sequel to the jealous cleric saves you audio I posted to YouTube.

Sleep Treatment at the Magical Spa - 15min with 2min fade to silence
“My boss wanted me to tell you: If you’re unhappy with our services… We already have your money.”

Necromancer Girlfriend Gets Jealous… -10min

Witch Girlfriend Turns You Into a Cat! - 11min

The Intimate Mercenary Interview - 15min
Another personal favourite.
Synopsis: After intervening in a tavern brawl at dinner, you receive a  late night visitor. It’s Ash, the financier of a famous mercenary guild;  and she is burning to know more about you. If you answer her questions  she’ll have a few offers for you…

The Loving Raising of an Old Friend - 19min
Very sentimental, if I remember.

Love Confession After a Failed Dungeon - 12min

You’re Alive! - 6min
Interlude once you’re raised from my first series, A Necromancer Raises You.

Necromancer Epilogue - 15min Epilogue to my first series, A Necromancer Raises You.

A Cemetery Tryst - 9min

A Shy Love Confession - 5min