Illegal Immigrant CH23 - Check-up (Patreon)
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23 - Check-up
Where the library was vast and giant, the buildings before them now were much more…homely.
“Kinda looks like a village, huh?” James spoke from behind the wheel, glancing briefly back at Dawn.
“Mm…” Stuck in her car seat, Dawn openly murmured, but silently agreed. It did have that sort of vibe. Her side of the car had the giant sign standing by the car as they drove by, filled with different company logos and names. The buildings were different, but they didn’t stray far from vertical siding in light blues, yellows, pinks, and purples.
On the advert board she saw a few peculiar symbols. Glasses, a hammer? No, a gavel? Eye doctors, attorneys at law, the works. A mini plaza serving the needs of whatever company or service willing enough to lease it. Some had second stories, others didn’t, but they were all shingled the same with an accompanying white trim.
But as un-fascinating as it was, Dawn sighed, swinging her legs hanging in free space as she tried to push against her straps, but only felt the belts dig into the crooks between her shoulders.
There was no radio on the ride over. Not per Dawn’s request, but most likely per James’ assumed understanding. Once she felt them settle into their parking space, she waited for the death of the engine that soon did come.
“Okay…” James puffed some air, leaning his head down at a phone in his hands. The Little stuck in the back seat could hardly make out a thing on the screen, but the fact that it lit up and did more than stack on top of other shapes and prisms was enough to make her painfully envious, especially after her close encounter at the toy store. But her moment of jealousy was dashed once the screen went away and the Amazon’s head lifted and turned. “Ready to head on in?”
Dawn gave him the look of a dead fish. “No.”
“No?” James said back with a rise from his brows and a weak smile. “Not feeling up to it?”
“Nope,” Dawn said again, but with the tiniest amount of added spice to boot.
“...” James’ hand hanging on the top of the passenger seat tapped the top awkwardly, “Uh-huh… Well, guess we can’t do much about that, huh?”
And her eyelids sunk, leveling everything out when it came to her expression. Could he have not telegraphed it any more obviously? Yeah, there really wasn’t anything they could do. Nothing Dawn could. So she threw up her arms with a frustrated sigh, just so James wouldn’t touch her in the process of forcing her out of the car seat.
A fat buckle was clicked and the nylon slither from a seatbelt hissed as it retracted into the car and fell taut against the interior siding. But Dawn was still buckled in. Her straps didn’t go zip, zoop, or retract anywhere. Her’s were fitted and tightened. So James undid his own seatbelt first. Fine. Expected.
“Don’t ever tell Kat I said this, but,” he yawned as he rolled his shoulder and arm, flexing his bicep, “I can’t stand using a seatbelt sometimes…!”
She gave him a weird look, wondering why in the world she would care. After all, she hated him. What, did he want to give her something to use against him? Like a peace offering? Did he think she’d be satisfied if she got to assure him some kind of punishment or disapproval? Dawn quietly scoffed, turning the other way.
Then she saw his phone come back out. He lifted and adjusted in his seat and his chin started pointing down. What was he doing?
So Dawn waited too. For a minute, or so, and then a couple more. Her legs started drifting, oscillating, then swinging impatiently. She tugged on her straps, fidgeting with the button, until finally:
“Don’t we have an appointment, or something?” Not that she cared, but wasn’t it important, or something?
“Hm?” James leaned his head back over. “Ready to go in?”
It wasn’t the answer she wanted, hence another displeased look.
“No. I’m not.”
“Just let me know when…” he said with his eyes right back on his phone, and Dawn by this point couldn’t sit still, somehow desperate now to live vicariously.
“...What are you doing?”
“Me?” James answered without turning back, “just some stuff on my phone.”
“...” Christ, was she this starved to itch her brain? “What stuff…”
“Just work stuff.”
It was a carrot and stick, obviously, but with a metaphorically empty stomach, she had no choice but to give chase. “...What work stuff?”
“Electrical stuff,” he answered just barely more, leaving his answers just as frustratingly vague. “The kind of stuff that makes the lights turn on in houses.”
“...So they just let you do that: work from on your phone?” It’s not like she wanted to talk to him, but what else was she supposed to do? Go inside, or enjoy effective solitary confinement?
Without realizing it, she apparently had fallen into a recurring loop. “Does that mean you’re ready to go in?”
She blinked in annoyance, putting on a pissy frown.
“So is that how this works? You don’t talk unless I go inside?” She crossed her arms.
“We’re talking right now, aren’t we?”
“Yes, but only so you can bait me into going inside…” she mumbled annoyedly.
“Soo…that means you’re rea–”
“--No, I’m not ready to go inside!” Dawn shouted impatiently.
“...Okay then,” and James went back to his device, sounding unbothered and just as relaxed, meanwhile such a petty and stupid tactic already had the tiny girl fuming.
“Are you gonna unbuckle me too?” she huffed at him, trying to lean forward but immediately pissing herself off even more once the straps held her still.
“...So you’re ready?”
“No! Just un-buckle me!”
“If it’s out of the car seat it’s going inside,” James said simply, but with finality.
“So what– you just get to sit in your seat and do whatever you want, but I don’t even get to feel like I’m not a prisoner?!”
“You’re not a prisoner, Dawn. You’re free to go, in-fact,” James chuckled, and the girl grumbled.
“If I was free, I wouldn’t be here right now. I’d be doing something about my situation that actually helps me! Speaking of which: how’s that research coming? Have you figured anything out yet? Well? Have you?!”
“I’m still looking into it, but I get busy too, you know,” James explained, but again, he talked like he didn’t even have a horse in the race. He finally looked behind at her. “Ready to get some fresh air?”
“NO!”
Back on his phone he went, and Dawn went back to nothing more than her own anger and stupidly unsatiable curiosity.
Tick-tock.
Tick-tock.
It was as if that stupid mechanical timer was ticking away in her head, like she was trapped in the kitchen all over again.
“...Fine! Let’s just go already! Get me out of this stupid thing!”
Finally he changed his tune, but to one no better than the last. With a warning voice he asked, “Is that how we’re gonna sound once we get out of the car?”
“Wh–...!” Dawn stammered and bit her tongue in absolute pissy surprise. “NO! I WON’T! NOW LET ME OUT!” she screamed, but James from the front looked no less impressed, nor any more willing.
“F…fiiine…!” she groaned, thrashing even more in her seat and fighting a pointless battle. “I won’t yell! Just get me out of this thing…!”
Again his phone went away, leaving Dawn absolutely no more clued in on the pointless mystery on his screen, and just as disenfranchised since the start of this morning. She impatiently watched him leave the car, walk around, and finally open the door beside her.
“Now unbuck–” Dawn started to command, but his forearm crossed right over her, reminding her of the unfortunate existence of her personal maintenance kit; diapers included. She didn’t look happy to see the diaper bag slinging over his shoulder, but her one tiny, miniscule moment of reprieve was his thumb sinking into her seat belt button like an afterthought. And yet the button plunged with seeming ease, something that was impossible for the far smaller and weaker Little.
Whether she liked it or not, even Dawn knew the routine as the machine with muscles lifted her like a part off an assembly line. But the moment the ceiling above her was the sky and no longer the car, she immediately demanded, “I want to be put down.”
“We’re crossing the parking lot where cars drive, so no,” James explained and decided in a single sentence.
“Do you think I don’t know how to look both ways?” Dawn sputtered incredulously. “Just let me use my own feet for once!”
“Dawn, it’s dangerous. You can move around once we’re inside,” he answered dismissively and with finality. The car door was pushed shut.
“Come on! Why can’t you guys just give me a single thing…?! You take away my clothes, my underwear, my freedom– my everything! And you can’t even let me use my own feet?!”
“Dawn, hon, it’s a five second walk…” James explained.
“Then give me my five seconds!” Was she going to run? No, not this time. Given her roadblocks the last attempt, especially now with a man made of muscle, she seriously doubted her odds of getting away successfully.
James gave her a long look and Dawn’s indignant face surely wasn’t doing herself any favors whatsoever. But miraculously, she was slowly lowered to the ground.”
“Hold my hand,” James commanded firmly with his already smothering hers. His skin was rough and a little rugged. Solid and absolute like his body was made of bricks.
“I don’t need to–”
But James wasn’t up for negotiations. “It’s either this or I’m carrying you, now which is it?”
She tried hiding her bitter look as she watched the narrow aisle between the two cars up ahead.
“You’re just doing this because Katherine told you to…” Dawn mumbled with an attitude perfectly plastered on her face.
“No, I’m doing this to keep you safe,” James refuted but without any of the hostility he was getting back ten troves in return. Dawn started walking ahead, but, “wait,” and his hand left her radius of freedom extremely small.
She whipped her head and gave him a look, but for once James challenged her gaze.
“Do you want me to carry you? Is that what you want?” James dropped another ultimatum, but given the context and who Dawn was, it hardly felt like a question.
So without a choice, she waited for James to close the door, adjust the bag over his shoulder, and glance again at whatever stupid thing he was looking at on his phone…! In Dawn’s mind she was already primed for a very bad fucking day, whereas others might just write her off as “grumpy.”
“Kay, kiddo, let’s scoot,” James ushered with a light tug on her wrist.
Correction, would definitely write her off as grumpy.
The walk was short, but prolonged by another jerk back from James the moment they were about to emerge from the line of cars facing the empty parking lot lane. Right over was a thick cement sidewalk, and just beyond that were the gardens and brick-laid paths leading into each and every business responsible for who knew what.
“Ah– hey,” James warned again, “we look both ways before crossing, remember?”
“I…I did look!” Dawn grouched back, whipping her head both ways, and by some unfortunate coincidence only then did a car at the very end start to poke its nose around the corner, but it still was quite a ways away. “Let’s go. There’s no cars,” Dawn moved forward, but James did not.
“Whoa, hey there!” James raised his voice and Dawn was jerked back again with much more force. “What did I just say?” he scolded with a rise in his voice.
“Would you quit pulling me so much?!” Dawn shouted, scraping the sole of her shoe like she was raring for a kick. “It’s safe! I did look! No cars!”
“No. Look carefully,” he reprimanded, pointing out the exact slow-going car that Dawn had noticed the first time.
“I DID! All we had to do was walk across and it was safe! Jesus, just let go of me already!”
And to her surprise, he did. Only for half a second, though. In place of her wrist she was taken by the waist and lifted in the air.
“Wh-what? Put me down! Hey!” she fought and she struggled, kicking her feet against him and dropping her fists on his shoulder, but it was like hitting boulders. She barely did a thing and he didn’t flinch. What’s more is she was being robbed of the very few privileges she had left. It was a short yet demoralizing walk across the path and onto the sidewalk. “Put me down! Put me down! PUT ME DOWN!”
“Dawn…”
“PUT ME DOWN!”
“Dawn…!”
“I SAID PUT ME DOWN! STUPID–!”
“HEY!”
One word was all it took. The man boomed with his mighty shout, carrying a weight far heavier than Dawn could even remotely match a fraction of. Her mouth hung agape, mid-cry as a single stroke from his angered voice paralyzed her completely. The flash of fear was instant and in her eyes, and just as the bear she’d been poking awakened, he let out a loud sigh.
“That’s enough,” he said much more quietly, but the edge was still in his tone, and Dawn was not soon to forget just how loud he could get. Her hands rested uneasily and her feet hung limply. She was a wet noodle pinned to his side. “We will try crossing the street together again once we leave, if you behave yourself. Now I want an apology right this instant for that kind of behavior! Do I make myself clear?!”
He was holding her right against him and she had nowhere to run. Nowhere to retreat to other than the recesses of her own mind. But he gave her a stern look, one that looked to be one misdeed away from a full-on punishment, and she knew what to expect. She knew and that’s what terrified her.
“I-...” she caught her voice before it could crack. “I-I’m sorry…” she mumbled in a low voice.
“Are you going to talk to me or anyone like that once we go inside?” He laid it on even thicker.
“N-no…” she mumbled even lower.
“What was that?”
“No!” she raised her voice, then the change in expression on his face gave her immediate regret. “N-no! No,” she stumbled and stammered in a thick voice, “I-I’m sorry…! I…I knew what I was doing! You just didn’t listen!”
“No, Dawn, you’re the one that needs to listen and behave. Katherine will not put up with that kind of attitude, and neither will I. And absolutely, under no circumstances will you ever act that way with anyone else, either. Do I make myself clear?”
“Y-yes…” she murmured again, hoping that she really did just manage to escape death itself.
James seemed to be softening up, but they stood there under the overhanging roof right outside a white-painted wood and glass door.
But more importantly, could she not even cross the street, anymore? Not even that, but a parking lot? She couldn’t decide when she got out of her seat in the car, or if she got to use the toilet, go to the doctor, eat what she wanted, buy the things that interest her, read the books she wanted…?!
“Dawn…hon,” James comforted in a voice far removed from himself just a minute ago, and sounding much calmer, “I’m not mad, okay? It’s my job to keep you safe, and that means making sure you know that what you did is wrong…”
“I-It’s…” Dawn sniffled, trying to desperately wipe away the proof of her emotions that kept leaking out of her eyes. “It’s nothing…!” She sniffled again. “C-can we just go inside already…?” The sooner they finished this, the sooner Dawn didn’t have to participate with the rest of the world for another whole day.
She couldn’t care less if James was angry or not. He could think she was crying for whatever reason. All that mattered was Dawn’s crippling sense of loss. Everything was suddenly covered in either red or yellow tape now, and the fact that no one else could see how wrong that was put the girl beside herself.
The metal knob was turned and James walked them inside. It was an immediate transition to a waiting room. Chairs with elaborate wooden loops for legs held up cushioned backs and seats positioned in the center and lining the walls. From there just about all the adult or neutral qualities ended. The walls were one massive mural of a simplified cartoon landscape of grassy hills dotted with flowers, an ever-stretching rainbow with smiling clouds and a happy sun.
A fish tank came out of the wall where its top and bottom were cleverly designed as if an even larger sea creature were eating the entire enclosure. Some weird loch ness dinosaur thing with fins and a nose reminiscent of a dragon, but large and elaborate.
The waiting room was dotted with Amazons, all with their… “reasons” for being here.
“Nnn…” one nervous little girl clung onto her mother’s pant leg, staring up at the aquarium. “Mommy…?” she asked aloud in a shaky voice, yet her body seemed to sing a different tune as she kept squatting and bobbing her bum up and down, shaking her short skirt that kept flashing a white padded bottom. “I don’t wike the fish monster…” she moaned, but her “mother,” another Amazon with an “adopted” Little, glanced up for just a moment from her magazine to see what the spectacle was right behind her.
“Don’t worry, sweetie,” she smiled after chuckling at the imaginary monster, “he only likes to eat fishies, okay? Not cute little girls like you!”
“Mmm…” and yet she still wiggled skeptically.
“Tell you what,” she leaned down from her reading material once more, “Mommy’s gonna keep the fishie monster right here, so you go play with some toys where he can’t reach you, okay?”
“Mm!” And the girl vigorously nodded before toddling off like her life depended on it, much like how her bladder seemed to depend on Depends. And unfortunately if there was any thought that it was a normal exchange, Dawn had the displeasure of seeing bumps on the girl’s chest all the way over to a corner of the room sectioned off by half-walls.
It looked like a tiny land of toys. Wooden boards screwed into the wall with multi-colored winding metal strings with giant wooden cube and sphere beads all over them. Things reminiscent of expanding balls were there, and she spotted another man-boy sitting in shorts but with his diaper overcoming the impossible by peeking its disposable waistband outside his shorts and over his navy blue shirt. He was busy with some kind of toy construction truck, ignoring the small barnyard playset filled with plastic cylinders painted as people and animals.
A tall shelf of pamphlets were standing in the other corner, depicting imagery Dawn did not want to see, containing content that would more than likely make her sick.
Swapping from Bottles to Breasts: When’s the Right Time?
Diaper Fright and Your Little
Amazon Toddler Potty Training and how to Prepare your Little For it
Choosing the right Little Diet: From Softs to Solids
Which was worse: the ones with symbolic images of bottles, training potties, and diapers, or the ones that cut to the chase with more enslaved models just to advertise their own demise? One seemed far less secret and the other left more to the imagination. Maybe this was all just one prolonged stay at the library and they’d finally reached the horror section.
There were far more unfortunate pairs of people to watch, which Dawn was sorely sure she would see, but James walked them over to a counter where a woman was sitting in flowery scrubs.
“Hello, there!” the woman smiled brightly, and the moment she tried to give Dawn eye contact, she spun her head. “Welcome to Libertalia Little-atric Care. Do you have an appointment?”
“Yes, we should, at least,” James explained. “Her name is Dawn?”
“Dawn…” she hummed while she typed. “Can I have a last name, please?”
“Kepler,” Dawn blurted out and James’ mouth still hung open.
“Oh~!” the nurse chuckled, smirking at the no-nonsense Little. “So smart! Okay…Kepler…–ou,” she apologetically smiled. “I’m sorry, we don’t have anything under that name…”
Dawn frowned. Did they go to the wrong place, or did that LPS woman never actually schedule anything for them?
“Dawn Matthews?” James suddenly spoke up, sounding not one bit confused, meaning Dawn certainly was. She gave him a weird look, but the nurse had her attention just a second later.
“Ah, yep! Dawn Matthews. This is her first time with us, correct?”
“Yes, uh, she’s been very recently…adopted, and we don’t think we’ll be able to get any of her previous medical records…” James awkwardly explained, and Dawn was still trying to wonder just why she was using their last name.
The nurse simply giggled. “Don’t worry; we go through that all the time here. Congratulations on your adoption! Not gonna be a problem. She’ll start a new record with us here, and if you can I’ll need you to fill out some paperwork for us…” she swiveled in her chair, and Dawn could see now that under her soft pink scrub shirt was a pair of hot pink pants and white sneakers. Did they not have a standardized dress code here?
Even the clipboards were themed. A fat and wide alligator head was the pinch that pinned the paper to the glittery green translucent plastic board. The pen though wasn’t quite so eccentric. Basic bitch blue, as Dawn had hoped this place would be, but definitely wasn’t.
But since James was seeing the papers, now Dawn was too. It looked normal enough at first, but James was already skimming through the thin packet faster than she could focus on anything specific. Although…
Biological Age
(If known) Developmental Age
Allergies
Fears
(If Applicable) Adoption Date
Many different strange and concerning fields were spotted in no particular order, but she even noticed some kind of scoring sheet or rating chart, ranging from values expressed in quality rather than quantity. Her eyes widened with concern over what she could catch at just a moment’s glance.
Sleeps Well At Night: Very True, True, Unsure, Untrue, Very Untrue
Uncomfortable About Wearing Diapers: Very True, True, Unsure, Untrue, Very Untrue, N/A
Shy in new Situations: Very True, True, Unsure, Untrue, Very Untrue
Picky Eater: Very True, True, Unsure, Untrue, Very Untrue
She even spotted another questionnaire looking like true or false points, but by then James flipped back to the front.
“You can just fill that out while you wait for her to be called,” the woman smiled, and James thanked her. Dawn most certainly did not.
“Alright…” James sighed as he sat, and Dawn slipped right down into the empty seat beside him.
“Y-you’re not actually going to fill that thing out, are you?” Dawn muttered in disbelief just as she watched him lean forward with a pen to paper.
“Huh?” he turned his head. “Of course I would. Why wouldn’t I?”
“Y-you…! Didn’t you actually read anything on there? What is a ‘developmental age’?!”
“Dawn, it’s just stuff the doctor needs to know. Did you go to the doctor regularly back in your dimension?”
“Yes, but they don’t track stuff like my feelings in new situations or ask outright on a sheet if I’m a picky eater!”
“Doctor’s can sometimes do things a little differently, but it’s all the same information, I’m sure. Hey, why don’t you go play over there while I fill this stuff out?” and he pointed her over to the corner where Mr. Can’t-Keep-His-Diaper-In-His-Pants was assuredly sitting.
“Tommy?” A nurse called from the other end of the room. She smiled with her own chart in hand, standing behind a half-door gate.
And maybe it was lucky, or just a neutral coincidence, but a woman got up from her seat, beckoning to the man in diapers in the play area until she sighed and picked him up outright.
“No! Nooo!” he cried, holding his hands out to the corner, leaving Dawn to wonder whether he longed for the toys or feared for what was to come. Was…was she supposed to be worried? She felt a cold sweat coming on as she watched James scribble some more on the chart.
“I’m…I’m fine right here…” she decided, and James briefly glanced at her. And so she had all the time in the world to do the worst thing imaginable: people-watch.
It was like seeing Littles of all shapes and sizes in the busy room, tuning out the screams and cries from the occasional kid or skin-slapping reprimand that Dawn was no longer a stranger to. But those were just the ones with either fight or some kind of concerning warp in their minds that made them act as something less than adult.
Two female Amazon captors right in front of them were chatting with each other, actually. They smiled and laughed with each other while both their hands busied themselves with their captives like independently automated machines.
A man was in one of their arms, held by the waist as he was repeatedly bounced over her knee, audibly squishing and softly crinkling over and over the bloated once-white diaper around his hips. He had a distant stare and a mouth full of pacifier, as if he’d mentally checked out. His legs looked far from toned; chubby, actually. As if…as if he actually had baby weight…
The other woman rocked her arms with a swaddled woman having her hair bunched up like a unicorn horn with a fat pink scrunchie of big beads. Her face was smothered against the Amazon’s fat chest for some reason.
“Yeah…!” the woman with the boy nodded excitedly. “I’m so glad it wasn’t just me either! Believe me: I get Littles are gonna act out, but kicking and hitting? I mean, you can only let them get away with so much, right…?” and her apparent friend nodded sagely so.
“You really can’t let them make habits out of that stuff,” she helplessly shrugged. “If the spankings and timeout won’t do it, well, you just have to show a little tough love?”
“Exactly!” the Amazon cheered in a quiet voice. “I was a little skeptical at first, but a few other mom’s in my group suggested it to me. I mean, I do kind of miss him being able to toddle around a bit, but it’s definitely worked wonders with him acting out.”
Dawn quietly watched her tickle the man lightly bobbing over and over on her knee.
“Now he’s my little cuddle bug!”
“So glad it worked out for you!” her friend smiled warmly, almost making Dawn insane enough for a second to think that she didn’t just listen to correcting behavior by mutilating bodies. “Oh…ou…one sec…” she sighed, pulling the swaddled girl away, and a queasy feeling hit the spectator’s stomach once she saw the naked breast. A naked breast with a swollen, dark nipple, dr…dripping with white…?
“Gotta swap,” she explained, and it was tit-for-tit as the fake mother tugged up her bra over the milk tank, adjusted her button-up and eventually exposed the other. And without hesitation the girl trapped in a blanket cocoon seemed to take to her breast instantly.
Dawn could barely sit still, feeling a hot bile trying to escape her stomach. W-what did she just see? How was this real? The women seemed normal, and that’s what shook her the most. Their laughs, their gestures. They really did seem like housewives at first glance, but that was it. She was well within range to see the finer details and hear the distinct words that really made them the monsters they were. Pride and pleasure in taking grown adults and confining them to diapers, exercising their whims on them and permanently breaking them just to ensure obedience.
All the while, she spun her head to her own guardian, a fellow Amazon nonchalantly writing away on paper after paper for a place that the same freakshows across from her also attended. And somehow, she was supposed to tell herself that it was different. That the circumstances were not the same. In spite of being just as trapped she was somehow an exception to the rule with whatever she was seeing right then. But nevertheless she was downright uncomfortable.
“J-James…” Dawn whispered, trying to get his attention, but either she wasn’t loud enough to reach over the other hushed discussions and clashing toys, or he was too preoccupied with the papers. “D-...Dad…?”
“H-huh?” James turned his head, and all Dawn gave him a desperate look.
“Can we please sit somewhere else…?”
“Why? What’s wrong?” he didn’t show the same visible sense of concern that Katherine could, but Dawn guessed that she was hearing it over the sound of her own heartbeat.
“I’m…I’m uncomfortable.”
James slowly nodded, then asked, “So are you saying you think you need a change?”
He missed the mark entirely and it threw Dawn even further off her mental balance.
“N–!” she was about to erupt, but then remembered the discipline that she just received. “Nn…no…! I…I just…please? Can we please move?”
“Dawn, hon, go play,” and James dismissed her.
Why wouldn’t he just listen? Dawn was standing on her knees in the seat, giving him a lost and helpless look. The corner of her eye caught wind yet again of what unnerved her the most, and apparently her only way of dealing with that was either to suck it up or go someplace else on her own where she didn’t have to hear it. As much.
“Ah! Careful, Daddy!” A coy voice grinned at them. James lifted his head and the Amazon busy getting her breasts sucked dry, was smiling at them, but Dawn felt nothing more than being ogled like a piece of meat. “Be careful~” she said again in a playful whisper, sticking out her finger squarely at Dawn. “It’s not a good idea to let her play like that in high places,” she explained, and her coconspirator nodded just as much.
“Oh yeah, don’t want that cutie taking a tumble!”
Did they think she might fall? And while it may have been considerate on account of Dawn’s size, it didn’t excuse the patronizing tone they had.
But the most unfortunate part of all was that James actually listened. He turned his head and looked at Dawn, suddenly making her think that she was caught red-handed in the act of doing something that should have borne no crime. And yet, Amazons always seemed to have a way of putting just about everything out of a Little’s legal reach.
She rolled her eyes with her head to the side, hoping James would do the exact same.
“Dawn, hon, off your knees,” James surprisingly admonished her, and she was shocked.
“Wh-...but I was just trying to get your attention!” she complained, the Amazon mothers simply smiled, and James stayed unyielding.
“Not up for discussion. You’re gonna get the seats dirty. Here–” and before Dawn could truly protest, she was lifted off the seat and plopped on the floor. “Now go play while I finish filling this out,” he said, but didn’t go back to the paper. He waited expectantly.
“But…! But all that stuff asks about me!” Dawn put a hand to her chest. “I need to answer them, don’t I?”
The laughing started again right behind it, and it made the Little cringe with embarrassment.
“Sweetheart, I’m sure your daddy knows everything about you! You should let him handle the boring grown-up stuff, okay?”
And Dawn had half a mind to go batshit at these women. Who the hell were they to heckle her own situation and be the bitches that caused this in the first place?!
But before she could, and single hand was enough to steer her by the shoulder and point her at the play area waiting down the other end.
“Go play,” James said simply, and just as Dawn turned to try and say some more, he followed up with, “Don’t we wanna tell Mom that today went well?”
And she froze.
Was that a…threat? Was he holding Katherine’s approval over her head? And so what if she disapproved? What, she wouldn’t get to read her book at all that night?
Wait. No…reading?
In a world now where she had so little, her horrible human condition dictated that she held dear the last few precious things she had. Katherine got her the book, so Katherine could just as easily take it away, and the fact that it genuinely bothered her made her furious.
“And no temper tantrums,” James frowned, like he was ready to take on a tiny tot, but his diminutive speak was lighting even more of a fire underneath her. But she turned on her shoe and stomped off, slapping her flat soles against the dark yellow marble floor the whole way.
And just in earshot as she walked away, she heard the two Amazons suddenly chatting James up.
“Good job, Daddy!”
“Way to go! Did you just adopt? Awh, as cute as she is, she still seems a little sharper than she should be…”
“Yeah, she’s a cutie-pie! Sounds like you’re babysitting for Mom today, huh?”
Not my problem. Not my problem. Not my problem…!
Further down all she saw was more things she didn’t want to see.
“You’re gonna spoil him, you know…” A nearby wife chastised her husband with a helpless smile, watching him with a Little laying in his lap, opening their mouth wide for a blue baby bottle of something.
“It should be fine…” he chuckled, and Dawn noticed the massive diaper bag nestled between the couple’s legs. “Besides, they needed a stool sample today anyways, right?”
Both Amazons looked like they were fresh out of the office. The wife quietly exhaled and, “fair enough,” she shrugged, then her face softened and her red lips puckered as she leaned over and started softly cooing at their make-believe child. “Who’s a little munchkin, huh? You? Is that you? Huh? Huh?”
Dawn kept walking, trying to ignore the sound of her own thankfully dry crinkles.
“Abby! Gabby!” A plump woman hissed, and Dawn felt shivers just to hear the familiar name associated with so much literal weight. This Amazon had two Littles in her lap, sitting either one on either leg somehow contained by her pants. Unfortunately they had no kind of stress covering their bodies because it was all open concept.
Both blonde-haired girls were in identical ponytails, white dresses and accompanying red ribbons tying up the back that traveled no further than their hips. The white clothing continued, but it wasn’t the dress, and instead their butterfly-patterned pampers looking thick and bloated.
“You are both sisters and twins now!” the Amazon continued her scolding, giving them both a mean look that identically pushed them to tears. The only thing stopping their cries were the strawberry-red pacifiers inside their mouths.
On the corner another was stuck in a stroller, only their feet were bare and their legs kicked aimlessly, but low, as if there wasn’t enough muscle to lift them any higher.
Just stop looking… Just keep moving…!
Smells of powder, perfume, pee, and poo. Deceptively kind and blatantly cruel, Dawn seemed to toe the line of the entire melting pot that this waiting room was. It was all one sick and grueling poison, and not a single ingredient wasn’t spoiled. It was a breath of fresh air for her eyes and ears once she stepped down into the play area, finally in a place where she didn’t have to see so many public displays of body horror. She practically fell on her knees on a multi-colored plush puzzle play mat.
She was too dazed to notice for a moment the two other guests she was sharing the break room with. Across from her on the other end were a miniature man and woman, just like herself, sitting across from one another. A red and blue rubber ball rolled back and forth between their legs, spread apart like goal posts.
Dawn briefly glanced at them, nervous from just about everything at this point. Between the Littles she’d seen in James’ and Katherine’s neighborhood, at the library, and now this sick excuse for a doctor’s office, was there any Little actually sane anymore? The few still cognizant enough to look tortured and afraid existed, yet in such few quantities. And again, Dawn was expected to believe that in a best case scenario she wouldn’t even become that?
“Hey, uhm…you alright?”
With her body covered in goosebumps, Dawn visibly jumped at the sound of another voice. A coherent sentence that wasn’t in the form of condescending or patronizing. With a bewildered look she tried to trace the sound of the noise, finally landing it on the female Little craning her head back to look at her.
“M-...” A finger pointed at herself. “Me…?” Dawn asked.
“Uh, yeah. You look like you’re in trouble, or somethin’,” she shrugged, still looking at her with an upside down head. “Did you make your Mommy mad, or something?”
“M-my…wh-what?” Her expectations were suddenly betrayed. She sighed, disappointed for believing that she actually found someone on the same mental level as her.
“Shut up…” the man across from her said much more clearly. Much more…adult-ly… “She’s obviously freaked out.”
“Yeah but you never know…” the girl moaned back, right as she flicked up her head.
Had it not been a dimension dictated by diapers and giants, Dawn would have thought she was seeing almost a cute couple’s outfit. Both man and woman were in overalls, baby blue and powder pink respectively. She could see where their asses became inflated through the corduroy, and the matching ducky embroidered on their chests discredited the “adult” appearance as well.
What she saw did not agree with what she just heard, but she cautiously approached them both, muttering, “W-wait…are…are you two…normal…?”
“Normal?” The woman frowned, sharing a look with her partner who did not quite reciprocate. She laughed loudly, “Like, what’s ‘normal’?!” But the moment she raised her voice it was like her buzz died instantly, sinking into a disinterested frown, then grabbing the trinket Dawn hadn’t noticed dangling by a tether from her suspender strap. Doing it herself, the woman popped a pacifier in her own mouth.
Dawn stood there awkwardly, unsure of how to respond, especially when the man was giving his partner his own look erring on either annoyed or disinterested.
“I’m Kyle,” he pivoted and suddenly introduced himself. “You?”
“D…Dawn…” she hesitantly answered, more shocked over the fact that it was starting to feel like a legitimate conversation. She walked over and slowly started to stretch out her hand for a shake, but he politely waved her off.
“No offense, but I don’t really wanna pretend,” and Dawn dropped her hand, but felt confused. Only for a second, though. Getting a better look at his own pacifier clipped to his overalls, and seeing where the diaper bulge began along his torso, it was clear how much a “dignifying” gesture would have hurt or meant so little. He knew and now Dawn knew just how little that would amount to anything.
“S-sorry…”
“Nah, it’s whatever,” he glumly replied. “Dawn, right? She’s Jessica, but don’t feel like you have to talk to her.”
And in a dramatic fashion the girl glanced up at Dawn again, throwing back the waves in her hair, then pulling out her muffler just to say: “And don’t feel like you have to talk to Kyle. He smells stinky when he poops his diaper.”
The crease between Dawn’s brows sagged, and Kyle rolled his eyes.
“Yeah, and would you know it you smell too,” he groaned, then looked back up at Dawn. “So, you okay? You definitely seem like a newbie. This your first time here?”
“Yes,” Dawn blurted out, “it’s…it’s my first time everywhere…! God, I don’t belong here… This isn’t even my dimension!”
Jessica and Kyle both gave her a weird look, and in unison, save for one mumbling through a pacifier, they said:
“Huh?”
“What do you mean, ‘not from this dimension’?” Kyle frowned, and Jessica gave her a skeptical look.
Dawn blinked. “I’m a…a portal Little?” That’s what she was referred to as, wasn’t she?
Jessica aimlessly made popping sounds with her mouth, opening and closing. “Sounds like you’re just playing pretend. She’s playing, right?” Jess asked Kyle, who still looked stuck in confusion before doubt.
“N-no, wait…” Dawn tried to explain, desperate to finally have confidants. “I-...I know it sounds weird, but seriously, I came from another dimension! I– there was this advertisement, or this offer to come here and tour your dimension!”
And Kyle tilted his head for a moment, like he was deep in thought. His mouth finally opened and he went to speak, but Jessica blurted aloud,
“OH YEAH! The! The…!” she repeatedly slapped the mat with her frantic open palm, sounding like she was trying to drum a memory into her head. “The…! The uhm…!”
“Portal technology…” Kyle quietly finished for her.
“Yeah!” Jessica excitedly pointed at him. “That!”
“Yeah, that’s how I got here!” Dawn smiled, glad that there was finally a connection. “I came through one of those for a tour!” and then the bad memories and sore feelings came back. “I…was supposed to go home a few days ago, but some fucking Amazon…” she angrily muttered under her breath, suddenly peering over her shoulder to see if a giant had heard her.
“So we can really go to other dimensions now, huh?” Jessica ooh’ed and ahh’ed with her feet rolling left to right on their heels. “Oh! Kyle! Maybe Mommy’ll take us on vacation to one!”
“Doubt it,” Kyle rolled his eyes, then roped Dawn back into the loop. “Jessica and I were adopted a couple years ago. We don’t get to hear a lot about the news unless we overhear it, so…” his eyes panned Dawn from head to toe, “just surprising, is all.”
“Are portal Littles not common?” she looked between both Littles. “A-and wait, no, don’t say that– you were kidnapped! We all were!” Dawn insisted, and they shrugged.
“Even if you’re foreign, I bet your poopy diapers still stink the same,” Jessica turned the other cheek.
“Why do you keep talking like that…?” Dawn frowned, but Kyle pulled her attention again.
“All she means is say it however you’d like. It doesn’t change what it is and what the louder voice is gonna make it sound like…” Kyle explained, sounding sapped in every sense just to say it. “But wow…yeah, no, portals weren’t really a thing when we were…well, not like this,” he sighed, stretching his shoulder strap right for it to slip back into place. “Guess native Littles weren’t enough for Amazons?”
“No, it’s not to adopt,” Dawn corrected, “--I mean kidnap,” she emphasized. “We just came here for a tour! Yeah, our guide offered, but…” But…
“But…?” Kyle continued for her, and Jessica gave her a bored look.
Quota.
The word echoed in her head, just like it did that night when all her worldly possessions disappeared. She went quiet as the realization sunk in. Jessica sighed, and Kyle gave her a borderline sympathetic look.
“So now they’ve got Littles coming on their own?” Jessica frowned. “Like, did they promise you a cookie, or something? I mean, maybe if it had those chocolate chips I like, I might go….”
“Jessica, cut it out,” Kyle quipped, and her cunning response was blowing her flapping tongue at him. They were lost in their own sibling banter while Dawn felt dizzy on her feet.
Was…was she really tricked from the start? She…she knew Stacy had ill intentions and was obviously trying to write off stragglers, but was that the plan of the tour itself? Not just a sole person’s agenda? She looked up and around at the walls, and then the ones even taller than the Amazons, covered in paint and pictures meant to subdue and soothe the mentally broken and permanently diaper dependent.
Her stomach went queasy just from glancing down at the puff in her pants. Designed for her. Fitted. Just like Kyle’s, and just like Jessica’s. Just like every swollen, pee-soaked and poop-filled diaper she saw on her waddling and toddling stroll over here. The world was underwater and every noise was swirling and droning, fading in and out of focus like a mumbling blur of madness.
“Hey, hey!” Jessica interrupted her thousand yard stare. Her face was gleeful and excited, the exact opposite of everything she was feeling right then. What could she possibly have to say? Was she going to comfort her?
“Does your dimension have trees with money for leaves?” She was patient for all of a second, long enough for a confused puff of air to leave Dawn’s quivering lips. “Our Mommy says that money doesn’t grow on trees, but do they where you’re from?”
She was still speechless; dumbfounded by the question whether she was actually serious. But she looked earnest enough, leaning forward, showing off her chest that was enough to inform she should be smart enough to know otherwise.
“Jessica, can you stop with the stupid questions?”
The moment he started speaking Jessica already looked annoyed. “If you call me stupid again, I’m telling!”
“Then go tell. I’ll just say you hit me.”
“No I didn’t!” The woman gawked, and Kyle rolled his eyes.
“Yeah, that’s how it works.”
“Booh!” A deep, cheery voice cried, and all three Littles saw an Amazon standing at the entrance of their domain, setting down a Little, a man, diapered bottom hiding behind a meager outfit. His bare legs that looked like they should have had hair didn’t, and his shiny faded brown hair was short and prim, just like the collar on his onesie.
“Play nice with everyone, okay, Billy?”
“Bah!” he answered back, either sputtering straight gibberish with spit rolling down his lip or speaking a language far too advanced for Dawn. His feet came down first, but they didn’t even look ready to stand. They were already bending at the knees and the slightest sign of pressure made them buckle.
“Bye-bye! Mommy’s gonna be close by!” and she gave the mind-fucked man a small wave before sitting nearby.
“Wh-why…” Dawn muttered next to Kyle, still with her eyes on the man like a morbid curiosity, “why are so many people like that…?”
He crawled on his hands and knees, showing remnants of an adult face but without any of the sparkle in his eye. His mouth hung open dumbly and it was clear where his own dribble had stained the front of his outfit. His head turned every which way, making some kind of noise every time his primitive mind found something interesting. A foam block, big ball, or inflated imitation of an instrument; a rainbow-colored xylophone smiling with its teeth as the notes to be played.
“Dunno, you’d have to ask his Mommy or Daddy why he’s like that,” Kyle shrugged, looking neither engaged nor dejected. Just…there. Either way, just be glad you aren’t like them. Believe me, it’s better when you make the choice to piss yourself than others for you.”
“H-how…? How are you saying it like that though? Like it’s just normal? You can just see something like that and it doesn’t bother you?”
“You’re the one talking about him as if he isn’t even there, right?” Kyle countered, and Dawn froze.
“Th-that’s…” she looked at the Little again, looking happy as could be, as if he were experiencing the world for the first time all over again. It was all fresh and new, but only because someone dialed back the clock on his mind for him. “Can…does he understand us?”
“Beats me. Once an Amazon makes their Little like that you never really figure out what’s left underneath, if anything. And yes, it does bother me. But here’s a tip: don’t let it bother you.”
So just choose to keep her head down and bury it in the sand… Fucking great.
The babified Little then stared at all three of them though and immediately started making a beeline, crawling as fast as he could.
“Jesus, please stay away…!” Dawn whispered. It wasn’t because she hated the man, but because she despised everything that’d been done to him. It made her sick and brought on tears. Amazons like that really existed? People that could just take twenty, thirty, or maybe even forty years of life and just wash it away? Just like that?
And right as he was about to co-exist with them, a crinkly and pink corduroy rump swung its way between Dawn and the uninvited guest.
Jessica was on her hands and knees, staring the Little down with the same exact posture. He came to a halt and tilted his head, and Jessica did the same.
“Buh…booh…! Booh!” he said, and Jessica giggled, making similar noises right back.
“Buu-bah! Bah-booh!” she flapped her tongue and slapped the ground.
“Ooouu….buh!” he said right back, and suddenly they were like a meeting of minds.
Jessica babbled back and forth with the boy, likely having no understanding with each other than just by feeling. The discomfort and bewilderment was at an all time high for Dawn, who couldn’t look any longer when it was being treated so…so casually…!
“So wow,” Kyle spoke up behind her, “you uh, really are a newbie, aren’t you?”
“Yeah…and I want to stay that way, because I am going home,” she clenched her hands. “Back to my dimension.”
“Uh-huh,” he nodded, but his own opinion didn’t sound like it stretched beyond neutrality. “So who brought you today? Mommy? Daddy?”
“James did,” Dawn emphasized. “And they’re neither of those things. James is James and his wife, Katherine, is just Katherine.”
“Yeah…you really shouldn’t do that.”
“Do what? Call them by their names? They get to call me by mine, don’t they?”
“Dawn, right? Big tip: don’t ever expect a double standard. The way you treat others and how you get treated are related, but it’s never one-to-one.”
“You’re actually okay with calling your…! Your kidnapper ‘Mommy’?”
“That’s the point. It’s not about what I’m okay with. It’s about what I have to do.”
What you have to…? Dawn kept looking at him strangely. “Until what…until you escape?”
Kyle let out a dumbfounded laugh, enough to make the girl self-conscious.
“Escape?” he repeated in a low voice. “Escape where, exactly?”
“Another dimension…!” Dawn reasoned, but the man looked no more sold. “My…my dimension, it doesn’t have Amazons! It doesn’t have Littles, either! We’re all just people there!” and by her foot she noticed a foam toy then promptly kicked it aside.
“Look, Dawn, I wish you the best, really, but I’ve made terms with what’s happened. No matter what, just consider yourself lucky if you are who you were at the start of all this.”
“Stop talking like it’s the end!” she stomped her foot, slapping the padded floor. “You’re the first normal person I’ve met, and you’re just some kind of defeatist?”
“I’ve tried what I could without risking and losing what’s still left in the process,” he frowned up at her. “Maybe portal Littles don’t get it at first, but you’ll understand.”
Kyle was a voice to talk to, but with none of the answers she wanted. He was her first source of information on a world she barely understood; a person that didn’t look down on her speak as if she was a child. But he had no will to fight and no information on what she needed the most. He was indoctrinated. Complacent, yet clutching onto his meager pieces of freedom that was his own mind. And then there was Jessica…
Dawn watched her play with the bonafide baby some more, having gone from someone able to maybe keep a conversation to just as emotive and blubbering.
Almost hesitantly, like she was broaching a potential taboo, Dawn asked, “Is…is she okay, too…?”
“Who, Jessica?” Kyle looked over. “Oh yeah, she’s all in one piece,” he chuckled. “Sorta. We all cope in different ways. I’m…who I am, and she’s who she is. You crack or just roll with it, assuming Mommy or Daddy doesn’t make the decision for you.”
“So she acts like that by choice?” Dawn’s eyes went wide, looking the woman over for just a little bit longer. She played, rolled and looked just as mindless as the other in that moment. But somehow, in some inexplicable way, Dawn could see it; the shine in her eyes… And even…even her squat, and her grunt…and–
“Yeah, it’s a little gross how she can just do that…” Kyle grinned at Dawn with her grossed-out expression.
“How…how did this even happen to you guys? How do people just get taken here?”
“Us? Mm. Unlucky date night, I guess.”
Dawn had a double take. “Date night–?”
“But she’s my sister now, and that’s all there is to it,” Kyle rushed ahead with his words. “But yeah, if you’re a Little, you probably don’t stay free for long. It is what it is. Especially now if this dimension is starting to steal Littles from other ones… I don’t know how infertile Amazons can be if there’s somehow plenty enough to call for interdimensional human trafficking.”
It was just another crumb, but the word “infertile” seemed to hang its hat on Dawn’s hook. But she went on anyway to ask, “You said that portals weren’t a thing when you were…free, so…how does it not bother you just hearing about them now?”
“What, as in believing that they’re a thing?” Kyle shrugged. “I dunno. It sucks to admit, but Amazons are smart. Really smart. Some Littles are too, but…well, not like you get to hear about that much. Think what you want about them, but Amazons are really good at a lot of stuff. You said your old dimension doesn’t have Amazons, right? So just a world full of Littles? Pretty primitive compared to here, I’m guessing? Not that it doesn’t sound nice, though…”
“It’s not primitive,” Dawn said somewhat defensively. “We have technology just as advanced as everything I’ve seen here!”
“Oh yeah?”
“Yes,” she answered rather quickly. Then she thought of the library and the sorting system. The complicated codes and robots running on tracks to sort and retrieve books. The simple and stupid little things like the intricate knots her shoelaces were tied in, or the complex windings on the bread ties from the plastic bags…
Just as advanced…just…different…
Kyle suddenly asked, “So Littles in your dimension discovered portal tech too? They made first contact?”
“Y–...” she started to answer, but stopped. They did have portal technology. After all, how could she have come here? But the same month that she came was the first she ever heard of it. So wild of an idea that the suggestion was almost enough to tear the spam mail advert in two once she first read it. Something straight out of science fiction. Something far beyond the scope of modern technology as far as the public knew.
Just like fiction… Suddenly from phones in their pockets and exploding cans into space, and then…dimensional travel?
Who…who found who first?
It was their technology, right?
“I dunno,” Kyle sounded his stumpedness for her. “Thanks for giving me something to actually talk about, though,” he side-eyed his mysterious partner again, firmly planted on her bottom now with whatever she had done inside her diaper. But based on Dawn’s twitching nostrils, the mystery wasn’t much to solve. “With her it’s like rolling the dice to see if she’s gonna have at least half an adult brain…”
“But…wait, how are you still…you?” Dawn asked awkwardly, finding no other comparison than the one making genuine baby noises and not just pretending.
“Good parents, I guess,” he answered in air quotes. “Just because it’s inevitable doesn’t mean it’s not it’s own kind of lottery. The fact you’re walking and talking too must mean you were adopted by at least someone that’s not the worst of the worst.”
And finally she clicked her tongue, looking downright displeased. “As if. And no, they did not adopt me. They’re people who lied to me and tricked me. They’re just letting me stay with them until they figure out how to get me home.”
“Really? They’re helping you get back home?” he asked, but the surprise wasn’t as great as Dawn would’ve expected.
“Y…yes, they are,” despite how incompetent they seemed. “And if they can’t I’ll just go with that LPS or whatever it’s called. Christ, why didn’t I just go with them from the start? They care about Littles or whatever, right? So maybe–”
“No,” Kyle firmly interrupted. “Absolutely not. Do not have anything to do with LPS.”
The sudden and grave assertion had her taken aback. “What…? Wh-...well why not? They’re like this place’s government CPS or whatever, aren’t they?” Best interest at heart, and all that? Wouldn’t it be their mission to get her home?
“They ‘protect’ Littles,” Kyle answered in more emotive quotes. “The government is run by Amazons, so LPS is run by Amazons. Do the math. Or no– better yet, think about your situation now, right?” He waited for an answer.
“Yeah…?” Dawn frowned confusedly.
“You’re making full sentences and can think about stuff without craving a toy or pooping your pants. Yeah, it’s a sucky standard, but you’re only above that line because you’re in whatever situation you have now. Even if you can’t tell, you’re lucky right now.” He let it sink in, and so did Dawn, but she still felt hardly sold, even if it was coming from the war stories of a veteran. “Whoever your parents are, I think right now they beat LPS by a long shot.”
Her uncertain look shifted to disgust. “Would you quit calling them my parents? Because they’re not.” Not by a fucking mile.
“Kyle…!” Jessica whined from the other end of the play space, “I think my diaper’s messy…!” she slapped her palm on the mat with a pout, while her nearby friend was fascinated by his own toes.
“And?” he frowned.
“So go get Mommy…!” and then she started to sniffle. Actually? “I-Ih’m…I’m gonna cry…!”
Dawn quietly panned her eyes back over to Kyle. “Is…is she serious…?” It wasn’t judgmental, but sheer concern for how perplexing the adult’s personality had become.
The man also in diapers sighed. “No, not really. Sort of. She’s always been a drama queen, even since we met in col–... Never mind.”
“S-sorry…” Dawn apologized with genuine guilt. The first time here when she felt truly and honestly sorry. She’d gone and tore open old wounds. “Uhm…and actually…does…does your Amazon or whatever give you a chance to…use the toilet? Like– an actual one?”
Kyle gave her a blank stare.
“You’re serious?” he asked, and Dawn sheepishly nodded, starting to squeeze her legs as best she could. “Dawn…no offense, but, does it look like I get that kind of privilege?” and he slapped his puffy protruding crotch. “I can’t even take off my own overalls without help.”
“Just…urgh! How can they justify something like that?!” Dawn outraged and dropped to her knees, just to hold it in as best she could.
“They all find a reason. Heck, I bet your doctor’ll come up with some random one too.”
“What? But they’re a doctor!”
“Amazons,” he shrugged. “But the point is, if you wanna stay sane, don’t try fighting that part.”
“What part?”
“Diapers, dummy,” he chuckled. “They’re gonna spin whatever reason they need to keep you in them, so all I mean is don’t hold out hope.”
“Jessica and Kyle?” A nurse called from the other end of the room.
“Whelp, that’s us,” Kyle sighed and pushed himself onto his knees.
“W-wait, already? N-no…but,” her mouth hung open, panicking from what little time was suddenly left and pondering all the different yet equally important things she wanted to ask him. He was like a golden goose. A person she could actually talk to…! “E-escape! H-how do I escape?!”
“Dawn,” he sighed, finally offering a look like he was trying to comfort a friend. “My…my Ex and I have been like this for years. If I even knew how to get out of my own crib, much less this dimension, we wouldn’t be here talking like this.”
And it was like a rock was dropped on her head. She felt dizzy and wounded, too stunned to barely even see him crawl right by her, crinkling and wafting his powdered butt the whole way through.
“Okay, who’s ready to go see Dr. Kipper?” An enthusiastic Amazon cooed at the front gates of Hell.
“Mommy, I’m stinky!” Jessica loudly elected herself, and there was a lighthearted chuckle.
“And I can tell!” she beamed, “And…upsie daisie!”
For a few seconds Dawn watched wordlessly, finally grunting and pushing the warm hiss into her diaper, seeing the therapy she’d mistaken as hope for the first and likely final time. And now with a diaper wetter than before, it became that much harder to tell the difference between herself and the boy currently sucking on his toe.
Kyle and Jessica, sitting in the arms of their own personal hell, laid against the massive bosom of their own Amazon and their own issues. Jessica already had her head nuzzled against the woman’s shoulder, and Kyle looked like he was just trying to exist. But Dawn saw his one last gesture; a small wave her way until their mommy turned and walked away. Far enough until they were beyond the girl's vision completely.
Gone.
For good.
“Dawn?” the next reaper called, and the girl barely flinched. The bell had been rung and her time was nigh. The inevitable approached and there was hardly time to emotionally prepare. She was half-preparing herself to stand and make her walk of shame, but quickly remembered that nothing was ever solo anymore.
“Ready?” James beckoned from the entrance of the play area. She barely nodded and stood, stumbling forward.
She could recognize the gesture that went to swoop her up, so she took a step back but latched onto his thumb and finger like a compromise.
“Wanna walk?” he asked the obvious. Dawn nodded. “Works for me!”
So they began their stroll to the half-gate, giving Dawn one more look at all the madness she had been hiding from.
More mothers deciding now was the time to breastfeed their Littles, and others simply delighted by the sheer embarrassment their slaves could have from wearing nothing but a diaper. Fathers bouncing boys and girls on their knees, letting some nap in their laps and more sickeningly twisted treatments.
“Look at you!” the attending nurse cooed down at Dawn, who kept her eyes beneath the waistline of her forest green pants. More white sneakers. The moment the Little stepped in,the gate softly clicked behind her.
“Did I need to bring the forms with me…?” James asked as he turned his head.
“Nope, no need! We’re gonna get that to the doctor. She’ll have a chance to read her information before she sees you. And we’re gonna go right in here…!”
A door was opened and a light switch was flicked.
There was a massive tree in the room filled with an entire civilization inside of it. A massive head of branches and leaves that spanned the entire room from floor to ceiling. Windows were carved out where the smiling and chatty squirrels and birds lived. Caterpillars crawled and juicy red apples grew. Short sequences of numbers, 1-2-3 and A-B-C’s were carved into the bark. If only it wasn’t just another painted cartoon on the wall.
A thick layer of plastic shielding seemed to stretch halfway up, protecting everything from a Little’s reach. A band of rubber lined the bottom, connecting wall to floor and kissing the cold foggy marble floor.
“You’re more than welcome to have her sit on the bench now or wait until Dr. Wexler comes,” the woman Dawn still had yet to look in the eyes explained to James.
It really was just a normal examination room. For the most part. There were two chairs to sit, assuming Mommy and Daddy both made the trip, a small bin, and two different countertops; one where Dawn could see the beginnings of a sink faucet.
“It should only be a few minutes!” the nurse said one last peppy sentence, then disappeared with the shutting door.
“Wanna sit in the chair?” James asked as he took his own seat, occupying his own lap with the diaper bag. It was Dawn’s way of assuming that he meant the empty adjacent chair. Not his lap.
“Fine,” Dawn answered and approached like a soldier.
“You don’t have to, you know?” James said and waited with his shadow already looming over the girl.
“I will,” she said in the briefest terms again, still waiting to be lifted.
So she was raised and deposited onto the seat. It wasn’t one meant for her size, but what else was new. The curved wooden back flowed in from the arms that were already high enough, meaning it was more like a headrest for her.
“Find anything fun to play with?” James asked, but Dawn kept her eyes forward.
“Nope.”
“Oh, well, sorry about that. Boring toys?”
“Yep.” Boring toys, boring people, sad stories, and so much more…
While there could have been more small talk between the two, frankly in Dawn’s eyes the possibility for that was squandered by not only her dislike of James, but being stonewalled at every attempt thus far in trying to talk to him.
It wasn’t the silence that Dawn minded, it was the uneasy feeling that James would somehow try building a bridge again over the one he’d torched and burned. More time alone meant he might delusion himself into thinking he could salvage something, and that was the last thing Dawn wanted.
And luck was finally on her side.
A sharp knock went one-two on the door, and without any further prompt the handle turned and a body emerged.
“Hi there!” A wavy blonde head of hair smiled. Her flats clicked in with a tablet and folder tucked between her arm and side. “I’m Doctor Wexler, and you must be…” she squinted for a moment, “Dad?” She smiled and stretched out her hand.
“That’s right, James,” he confirmed and warmly shook, and the doctor kept her smile.
“Great to meet you. And if it’s alright, I’m gonna stick with ‘Dad’. Sometimes too many names can be a little confusing!” Her personality was warm and inviting, and her tone seemed to be perpetually calm. The sound of her voice was somehow…smooth. Although, it didn’t change that Dawn didn’t appreciate being indirectly referenced like that. Like always. Things being done on her behalf that she never asked for; being accommodated like an actual kid would. What was she again? A Little-trician? Who was the monster that made this sick parody of an alternate reality?
Would she be listened to if she insisted on “Dad” staying as “James”? Probably not.
“Sure, that’s fine,” James simply agreed, and Doctor Wexler nodded appreciatively. She set her things down on the wooden shelf sticking out of the wall then turned back over.
“Perfect. And this must be my patient!” she dropped her head with a smile, mixing tiny amounts of sugar and syrup into her voice. “You must be Dawn!”
Even then though she sounded somewhat professional, which maybe with a show of formality and maturity, even Dawn could convince her into giving some form of similar respect. “Yes, I am.”
“Great to meet you, Dawn,” and with the same gesture offered to James, she held out her hand, truly surprising Dawn for a moment. Before the hand could disappear she reached out to shake, even if it was just the doctor’s cold hand smothering hers. “My name is Doctor Wexler, but that’s a little bit long, huh? If it’s easier, you can call me just ‘Doctor,’ ‘Dr. Wex,’ ‘Dr. W’, or whatever you might feel more comfortable with.”
Got it. So ‘presumptuous know-it-all’ it is?
There wasn't a white coat in sight. The doctor was dressed down almost like a middle class housewife. Black slacks and a purple ribbed sweater. Was she just a captor for another unwilling patient?
“So as I understand there’s Mom too, right?” Doctor Wexler stood back up, losing her tiny bit of added sweetness. “I had a minute to read the forms you filled out, but I might need to double check things as we go through.”
“Yes, my wife couldn’t come in for the appointment today; we both work and this was a bit last minute,” James explained.
“That’s completely fine,” she assured as she rinsed her hands at a nearby sink. “As long as we’ve got someone to drive this cutie to and from,” she briefly chuckled, and so did James. Dawn couldn’t help but glare at the man sitting next to her. “There’s some things we may talk about though that you’ll want to discuss with her, and there’s some questions I can’t quite ask Dad, no offense! So if you both ever can come in at the same time, I’d encourage that just so we’re all on the same page, but it’s nothing mandatory. And of course, it usually helps your Little feel more at ease when Mom and Dad are both around.”
No thanks. One is more than enough, and that in itself is pushing it. As far as Dawn cared, just the one was just for security detail.
“Sure, I’ll make sure to tell her that,” James said.
“Perfect. Feel free to keep sitting where you are,” and of course she looked at Dawn next, trying to be just as immovable. “However, my patients get to sit in the extra special seat,” she then addressed James, “ Is it alright if I pick her up?” Yet another question about Dawn, and yet another deferral to someone other than herself.
“Yes, it’s fine,” Dawn spoke up for herself, and Dr. Wexler turned her head.
“I guess I should have asked you, huh? I’m sorry about that!” Doctor Wexler apologized, per se, meaning Dawn couldn’t tell whether she was just being lighthearted or using some form of sarcasm.
Her hands hadn’t gotten any warmer when Dawn could feel them through her shirt, especially not after just washing them.
The examination table was a long cushion nearly running from one wall to the other. A long strip of paper was rolled out across, and for once something crinkled louder than her own diaper.
“Okay…” then she sighed, tapping away on her tablet, “Sorry,” she looked up from the screen and apologized to James, “the amount of paperwork that this office goes through…”
“Yeah? Lot of patients?”
“Too many to count, but getting to see so many faces is half the fun,” and after one last cursory glance she set down her device and draped a stethoscope around her neck. “Okay, Dawn,” Doctor Wexler started as the paper lining on the bench all around Dawn started to crinkle even more than her diaper did on a dry streak. Too bad hers was too wet to compare. “I’m gonna take off your shirt, okay?”
“Uhm…no thanks,” and to emphasize her point, Dawn’s hands strategically moved to the bottom of her shirt. “I feel fine.”
And despite her resistance, she expected James to step in and force her, or maybe Doctor Wexler would ask for some assistance for herself, but she didn’t. She just stood there and nodded.
“That’s great to hear you’re feeling fine. It’s my job to make sure you’re nice and healthy, so that’s already half my job done for me!”
And it was also at that time Dawn couldn’t help but notice the lion creature, or tiger? The feline animal built into her nametag.
“But you know, sometimes, there can be things going on in our bodies that even we can’t tell,” Doctor Wexler slowly explained. “That’s why just in case we go and see a doctor to double check.”
“Yeah, that’s nice and all, but really, I’m fine. I don’t have any medical issues. No histories with disease or illness. I’m fine, seriously,” Dawn insisted, crossing her arms and leaning back, right up until she was against the plastic layer covering a giant painted flower on the wall.
“Well if nothing’s wrong, then it shouldn’t be a problem if I look, right?”
Dawn narrowed her eyes. “I know what you’re trying to do. And yes, it would be a problem. It’s an invasion of my privacy.”
“Dawn?” All it took was the one word from James to make Dawn flinch. Doctor Wexler turned her head briefly, but chuckled.
“Thank you, Dad, but that’s okay! I want Dawn to feel comfortable letting me help out. Can you tell me why you don’t want me to help you, Dawn?”
“Because I’m not stripping naked,” Dawn frowned. Maybe if she was going to her actual doctor and not one that specialized in Littles like she was some kind of veterinarian. “And I don’t need any help. I said I’m fine.”
“I promise your diaper’s not going anywhere, though?” Doctor Wexler tried to reason, and while she may have been right on a technicality, it obviously didn’t suit Dawn’s standards.
“I…I don’t care about my diaper!” Crap! Not her diaper. A diaper!
“Uh-huh,” she nodded all the same, like it was an automated response. Then how about this, I’ll just slip this funny disc under your shirt, okay?” and so there was no misunderstanding, she held up her probing end of the stethoscope. “I’m gonna use this to make sure your breathing is as good as it sounds.”
Dawn knew she was pushing her luck, and it was only this woman’s good or at least tolerant graces that kept James from doing whatever he was going to do to her.
“Just that…” Dawn sighed and relaxed only slightly.
“Just that,” Dr. Wexler softly nodded, and the cold rubber rim was soon on Dawn’s naked back. “Now can you take a nice big breath for me? Hold it in…just like that. One…two…three… Good job!”
And she exhaled, repeating the ask and praise multiple times. Still working within Dawn’s demands, the doctor checked her front next, but not without Dawn trying to tug up the front of her pants every time she could see her own disposable waistband.
“Well, Dad, I really like the sound of her chest,” she said as she removed the tool from her neck. “Now I’m gonna check your blood pressure, Dawn, okay?”
She didn’t answer and simply watched her tear off the velcro strap and re-wrap it around her arm.
“It’s gonna feel like a really tight hug, okay?” Dr. Wexler made sure to say before the air started to inflate the wrap.
Pump.
Pump.
Pump.
In three rapid squeezes from the bulb the cuff inflated and a tight squeeze was on her arm.
“Ow…” Dawn couldn’t help but squint. Wasn’t this too tight?
“You’re doing such a great job,” Doctor Wexler said as she looked down at a digital gauge. “Mm…”
“What?” Dawn asked in a defensive voice. What was wrong? Why wasn’t she just giving her a pass?
“It’s slightly higher than what I’d like to see,” she explained to James, not Dawn, “but going to the doctor’s can be scary for a lot of kids, so I’m not too worried.”
“Wh-...I’m not scared!” Dawn spat aloud as her velcro strap was removed.
“You’re being very brave,” Doctor Wexler smiled. “It’s okay if you’re a little scared, though? Grown-ups get nervous all the time, too,” she explained, but the gesture was totally lost on the very mature girl. “So, Dawn, how’s Dad and Mom?” The doctor swapped to small talk as her tools and tests started to change.
“You’re gonna ask that when I’m right here?” James spoke up with a grin.
“Hm?” Doctor Wexler grinned right back, then focused back on her patient. “Let’s pretend like Dad’s not here,” she shrugged like it really was their own secret.
And Dawn’s face sank. Did she really want to know, or did she just want to check every box off her list to get her paycheck?
“Yeah, it’s fine,” she dismissively answered.
“Just fine?” Doctor Wexler tilted her head, and Dawn gave her a weird look. Was she looking for more?
“Yeah. Fine.”
“Dawn, it’s okay to be honest with me. Dad might be listening, but he knows just as much as I do that we’re here for you, okay? It’s both our jobs to make sure you’re happy and healthy.”
“So what– you actually want me to be honest? I won’t get in trouble?” she asked, but she still sounded like a skeptic.
“Of course,” the doctor nodded, and James looked just as laid back.
Dawn’s eyes still panned to either Amazon, looking for the trick or trap, but her mind must have been failing her because she didn’t notice one.
“It’s…” she sighed, “It’s bad. Horrible. I hate it.”
James certainly raised his eyebrows, but Doctor Wexler barely budged.
“Yeah?” she softly nodded, looking like a clear listener.
“Yes.”
“Do you think you could tell me why?”
Tell her why? How long did she want to be here? “Well, for starters, they kidnapped me,” Dawn put it bluntly and with weight, and the doctor slightly nodded, but stayed quiet, as if to let her continue. “They tricked me into becoming their slave– or doll, or whatever. They make me use diapers even when I told them I can use the toilet! They try to censor whatever I see, I can’t go anywhere without them keeping a leash on me…I’m just a prisoner that’s being treated like a kid! They control what I eat, what I drink– I don’t get any fucking choices! And whenever they say I did something wrong, I try to explain my side and they just punish me!” she threw her hands up in the air.
“But no–” she scoffed, remembering every moment of frustration and anger. “It’s apparently all back-talk,” she mimicked the word in a mocking tone. “I don’t get a say because that’s somehow misbehaving. I have to sleep in a crib! They treat me like I need constant supervision, and yet the dog gets to stay home alone? They trust me less than their own goddamn pet!”
She huffed as the burst finally left her system. She erupted and swore and still somehow wasn’t over someone’s knee, and that probably was headed her way the moment she left this place with James. In a sense, Doctor Wexler was protecting her from the backlash simply because it was her kingdom and her rules. James certainly looked uncomfortable in his chair, and while the Little-trician wasn’t smiling, she was still nodding attentively.
“Sounds like you’ve gone through a lot?” she commented, and it finally felt like common ground for the Little.
“Yes.” So much. So fucking much.
“Dawn, do you know what I am?” the woman pointed a finger at herself.
“A doctor,” Dawn answered simply. A doctor for what, Littles?
“That’s right,” she smiled, “and I’m a special doctor that’s just for Littles. I spent a really long time learning about Littles and the best ways to take care of them and understand some of the tougher situations they might be going through. Let’s face it,” she shrugged with a sideways look, “what you’re going through is a tough adjustment, isn’t it?”
“Y–...yeah…” Dawn answered, albeit a bit uneasy, “it is…”
“I’m sure there’s a whole lot you’re used to doing, but suddenly it feels like that’s all different now.”
Was…was she reading her mind, or something?
“Yes…completely different.”
“Let me guess, earlier bedtimes now?”
“Yes!” Dawn answered on reflex; enough to make her flustered for a second. “Wh-where I’m from, yeah the days are shorter, but that doesn’t mean I can’t adjust!”
There was the slightest bit of surprise from Doctor Wexler, and she even glanced over at James, but didn’t make any direct comment.
“I see,” she nodded, “and how long are the days you’re used to?”
“24 hours,” Dawn said annoyedly, “and what’re they here? 32, or something? I do just fine, though! But now they suddenly say I need to start taking naps?! And they make me go to bed early?”
“Mhm…” she nodded as she approached with something like a popsicle stick in her hand. “Can you open your mouth nice and wide for me, hon? Go ‘ahh’ for me, please.”
“A-ahh…!” Dawn sounded with her mouth open.
“Good…” she quietly commented, then brought back her normal volume. “24, huh? I can’t imagine how little work I’d get done in a day like that,” she shared a laugh with James, but it didn’t quite hurt the slight bit of comradery Dawn was starting to sense from the woman. “So are naps a new thing for you, Dawn?”
“Yeah, since the last time I needed them was when I was what, like five years old?”
“Oh wow…! That’s a long time!” Doctor Wexler wow’ed.
“Right?” Dawn agreed, and finally for once it actually sounded like an Amazon got it. “But they don’t care about any of that!”
“Well, Dawn, I really do think Dad and Mom do care?”
“How?” How could they possibly?!
“24 and 32 hours is a big difference. Did you know that a grown Amazon needs about 8 hours of sleep?”
“No, I didn’t…but that’s the same from my dimension! I only need 8 hours too!”
“For 24 hours, though?” Doctor Wexler raised a point, and Dawn bit her tongue.
“Y-yes…but I’ve been here for over a week now. I can handle it just fine!”
The doctor nodded, then spoke. “Uh-huh. When we don’t get enough sleep, feeling tired is a good sign of that, but what’s also another one is our feelings,” she emphasized. “When I don’t get enough sleep I can be a little grumpy,” she smiled sheepishly. “That’s what it’s like for Amazons, and it’s exactly the same for Littles. A lot of new things at once can be really stressful, right? If you’re not getting enough sleep it can make those things feel a lot worse.”
Dawn was ready for rebuttal, but it was a sense of logic that unfortunately hit her upside the head. It was the farthest thing from it, but the explanation felt like a sneak attack that actually appealed to a fair sense of reason rather than an Amazon’s ignorant view. “Then…fine! I sleep earlier, but I don’t need naps!”
“Well, if your day was 24 hours, I would definitely agree with you,” Doctor Wexler nodded. “Everybody needs sleep, but we’re only gonna sleep for so long at one time. That’s why Littles take naps just to get that extra little boost they need to make it through the day. Do you not like sleeping?”
“It’s not about not liking sleep! It’s about being told to do something that I don’t even get a choice in!”
“Sometimes that can feel unfair; choices being made for us. Amazons have to go through that a lot, too. But as your doctor, the number one person who wants you to be as healthy as can be, I say that Dad and Mom are making a good choice.” She looked at James. “About what time does she go to bed?”
“Usually 10PM, or so,” James said, “a few hours before us.”
A few hours?! Dawn looked bewildered. She was being locked away that long before anyone else?!
“That’s a good time,” Doctor Wexler commented. “And I doubt we’re missing much around then, either.”
Dawn was outraged, yet in spite of that she was somehow thankful to the doctor. After all, it was the first time she was hearing about actual numbers in reference to time.
“Believe me,” James sighed, “if I could get a full night’s sleep at that time, I would.”
“Hear that?” Doctor Wexler grinned at Dawn, “sounds like Dad’s jealous!”
Jealous. Sure. Dawn turned the other cheek, but her heart skipped a beat once she slid forward. It was brief but before she knew it her pants were down to her ankles and her diaper was no longer a secret.
“H-hey…!” Dawn complained, but her pants were set aside.
“I can’t check your reflexes when you’re covered up like that, hon,” Doctor Wexler explained, and she made no further comment. No words spared on what she was wearing underneath. Like a diaper was the most basic thing or last thing worth spending time on.
With a weird rubber hammer, Doctor Wexler bopped both her knees, causing her legs to involuntarily fire and kick.
“Perfect,” she quietly said again, making more mental notes, fading between her own procedures and conversation with her patient. After a warm plastic probe was briefly stuck in her ear, the doctor started messing with some device on the other counter.
“Oh, Dawn, I’m just gonna take off your shoes in a second, okay?” Doctor Wexler said over her shoulder.
“Wh-why…?”
The tool she was using, it was like some curved dish or table, long and wide and lined with padding.
“Sneakers can get the scale dirty,” she chuckled, “and I wanna measure you, not your clothes. But the shirt can stay on.”
It must have been universal Amazon magic, because it was a few seamless tugs on her shoelaces and Doctor Wexler had her naked feet on full display. She was lifted and pivoted over to the counter, and Dawn was still just as confused by what they were doing.
“Ah– no, no need to stand,” Doctor Wexler smiled, and an assuring pat on Dawn’s padded bottom had the girl blushing and mute. She tried to settle for sitting, but the doctor kept guiding her body, eventually having her lay down entirely. Was this really how they weighed people in this dimension? An explanation did come, but it wasn’t directed to Dawn.
“Usually we use a vertical scale for taking weights, but sometimes the Littles we deal with can have trouble standing or feel comfier on their bums or backs,” she said to James. “These tend to be a bit more accurate, too… And Dawn looks like she’s as light as she is healthy, which is great.”
And only then it clicked for Dawn. What she was laying on and how she was being weighed. Was this a scale for babies?
“Ah-ah, not yet,” Doctor Wexler calmly eased Dawn back down the moment she tried to get back up. “This is how we measure your height, too.”
Two plastic prongs were pulled out from the side against the wall, and Dawn could feel them sliding up to the top of her head and bottom of her feet.
“What kind of car seat are you using for her?” the doctor asked, another uncomfortable point for Dawn.
“Uhm…I don’t remember exactly, but for smaller Littles, I’d say.”
“Good,” she smiled and started undoing the measurement tools.
“Wh-what does that mean?” Dawn asked, trying to be included in the loop.
“That just means you’re on the smaller side of Littles, but that’s not a bad thing, okay?”
Great, so she was somehow short among the short? But did it matter much, given she could be the tallest Little in the room and still be pint-sized compared to every Amazon.
“Just make sure whatever you’re getting her stays in line with her height and weight bracket,” Doctor Wexler explained. “Things like car seats, strollers, and high chairs might seem universal, but you’d be surprised how much the lower end can be a safer and nicer fit for her.”
Christ, a better fit? Didn’t what she have already feel confining enough?
“I’ll double check with my wife, but I think we’ve been sticking with that…” James cautiously answered, and even Dawn could tell it wasn’t something he had considered. And frankly, the more ignorant he and Katherine were on the misguided views of Littles, the better.
“Okay…up we go,” Doctor Wexler soothed the girl that needed no soothing, and moved her back over to the table. “Well, Dad,” Doctor Wexler exhaled, “I can’t seem to find any problems with your little girl, here! The only issue I guess is a wet diaper, but I don’t think you need a doctor for that.”
Both Amazons laughed, and Dawn frowned with a blush all to herself.
“Is there anything you wanted to bring up specifically with me?” she turned her head, “or maybe if Dawn’s been having any trouble? Does she poop and pee okay? Eat what she’s supposed to? Actually–” she thumbed through her folder. “You mentioned on here that…ah– yep. She doesn’t like spicy food?”
“That’s not true!” Dawn blurted out. “I do like spicy! I’ve eaten spicy stuff since I’ve been here!”
“She’s tried stuff,” James explained, effectively overriding whatever Dawn had to say, “but it made her cry, gave her a runny nose, all that stuff.”
“Well, that’s not too surprising,” Doctor Wexler nodded, and Dawn was still being stubborn.
“He’s lying!” Dawn cried. “I do eat that stuff! It’s normal for me!”
“When you do, does it sometimes make your throat feel a little tight, or your whole mouth is really tingly?” Doctor Wexler asked the Little directly, motioning with her hands at each and every point.
“Y-yes…but that’s the whole point!”
“That’s very dangerous, Dawn,” Doctor Wexler had a soft expression, but her tone was severe. “The stuff that Amazons like can have a whole lot of nasty stuff that doesn’t taste good for Littles and isn’t good for their bodies, either. Mild and sweet, is what I’d recommend,” she said to James. “It’s not too difficult to find Little-friendly snacks or meals, or if you’re cooking from scratch, just be mindful about the ingredients you’re using.”
“I-I…I don’t need to eat differently!”
Dawn was ignored, and the conversation continued between the adults, and Dawn’s good will was burning away fast.“Is she going potty regularly?”
“This might be a better question for my wife…” James looked embarrassed again. “From what I can tell though…yes? Well…I guess when I’ve heard about it from my wife they tend to sound more like ‘moments’ than just regular things.”
Moments? Fucking moments? Like her shitting herself was a big scene? Christ, it wasn’t supposed to be something regular either!
Doctor Wexler nodded and hummed with her arms folded, but she seemed like she could weather any kind of storm. Dawn was just one of many to her but fit inside all the same frames, despite her unique circumstances.
"Don't worry; plenty of parents come in with the same concerns. It's not uncommon for Littles to start by having irregular bladder and bowel movements. That can be attributed to a change in diet– pre-adoption their diets can be hard solids, macro-complex sugars, overly bitter or not-so-right sweet without the proper nutrients, and all sorts of other things. Not only that, but raising a Little is a big change for you, Dad and Mom, but it also runs its course on your Dawn, too. It's nothing voluntary, but they can often be anxious or nervous about a change in environment. Kind of like how things can just set kids off in ways. Maybe a favorite cartoon gets them all excited when they hear the music come on, or they just wanna give a hug to their special big."
“But I’m potty trained!” Dawn stressed, nearly ready to fall off the table just to get over there and slap some sense into the doctor.
But every outburst she had was like another teaching moment for James. She was just a live example to be observed and analyzed.
“It can sometimes be a little surprising how quickly Littles might take to diapers once they’re adopted, but usually it starts from showing signs of dependency or other factors. Namely, though, you typically hear about them having an accident somewhere public or in front of others?”
It was the first Dawn was hearing of it, but clearly not for James, who nodded right back. They were trapped in their own conversation, and Dawn had no way of breaking into it.
“Well, there’s a lot to it, and every case is different,” Doctor Wexler sighed, “and believe me, we wish we had all the perfect answers. Potty trained Littles, at least what we think when we hear potty training, do exist, but like any words or standards, they can tend to mean a lot of different things to a lot of people.”
“So…most Littles aren’t really potty trained?” James asked.
“No! No!” Dawn cried. What was this woman doing?! She was ruining everything!
“Maybe not in the way that we’d potty train Amazon kids,” Doctor Wexler shook her head. “More often than not, the fact Little’s are able to use the potty is from a well-trained internal clock or habit. It can vary for some, maybe a few hours or just a couple, but it’s more that their bodies build muscle memory into when they’re sitting on the toilet. The feeling is associated and that’s how they just know when it’s time to pee or poo. Some might say they feel the need to go, but that’s usually their internal clock saying just maybe it’s about time to see if they need to go potty, not that they actually have to.”
“Y-you actually think that?” Dawn stammered. “You really think it’s all some big performance? That we’re just getting lucky?!”
“Honey, I don’t want you to feel like I’m being mean?” Doctor Wexler frowned.
“You’re just being cruel!” Dawn cried.
“Has she had a snack today?” Doctor Wexler again deferred to James, who was already fishing something out of the diaper bag.
“No! Stop! I’m not hungry! I’m not thirsty! JUST STOP IT!”
And a sippy cup of juice was promptly pushed into her mouth.
“Shh…” the doctor soothed with a smile. “Just have some of that, okay?” and she said back to James, “Naps and snacks can be real game changers. So if she’s ever having a tantrum during the day, those are good first-tries.”
And Dawn with nothing else to effectively say and gently put in her place, quietly sucked with a downright pissed look on her face. She had no more rope to play with, and anything else she said or did would surely be what hung herself.
“And where was I…oh, right! Accidents,” she chuckled, “so that’s why when Littles might have a bad dream the night before, or maybe a stressful moment during the day, it can really throw them off. Maybe if they’re sick– the reasons are just about endless. And it’s not just negative things; even if they get too excited or have some very big feelings, it’s absolutely more than enough to disrupt their normal routines. It can be pretty easy for them to forget about using the potty, and if they miss that cue, unlike fully trained Amazons, or the rare Little, they won’t feel that physical cue which really tells them when it’s time to go.”
James nodded, truly so, and it simply ate away at the girl forced to drink her juice. If she drank it faster, would it give her an excuse or opportunity to speak? Jesus, did this look like obedience just from doing this, or somehow make James think that subduing her like this really calmed her down or worked as a solution?!
“I’m sorry– I kind of took a detour,” Doctor Wexler laughed. “This is all important stuff, but once Littles go back into diapers it’s not like their clocks come undone or their habits break immediately. They’re still going to have those feelings about needing to go potty, and when they want to go but aren’t allowed to, that’s going to be tough for them. It’s different from what they know and that’s why they can be anxious until it bubbles over and their body makes that choice for them.”
“Should…should we be doing anything to make it easier on her…?” James asked, though he still sounded unsure.
“Again, making good dietary choices for her. Constipation can sometimes be what Littles confuse with feeling the need to poo. Even Littles will feel backed up, but they’ll definitely know they’re pooping once their body starts to do it on their own. Wetting their diapers is similar too. They’ll know when their diaper starts feeling warm and they’ll assume what happened. Just give it some time and her body will adjust. But– that’s not to say she can’t have treats or anything special, okay? Just make sure you’re feeding her things friendly to her tummy. No more spicy stuff, right?”
“Definitely,” James nodded, and Dawn wasn’t even halfway through her juice.
“Great,” the doctor smiled. “Is there anything else you wanted to ask about?”
“Well…a couple, but…”
The doctor gave him a knowing look. “Better over the phone, maybe?”
“Yeah, I think so.”
“Wh-what…?” Dawn pulled the sippy cup away from her mouth. “Talk about what? Tell me! I deserve to know!”
“I think we’ve talked quite a bit,” Doctor Wexler sighed and wiped the imaginary sweat off her forehead. “I think it’s better to discuss more later. Oh, which reminds me, Dad? If it works for you, I think I’m going to want to schedule a follow-up in a couple days; with Mom included. It’ll give us a chance to cover all our bases and take care of the last things I want to do, on top of what we might talk about,” she smirked, and the fact that Dawn had no clue what was being implied angered her to no end. “We still don’t know much about any vaccinations or shots Dawn might need or already have, so we’ll tackle that then.”
“You are not giving me anything,” Dawn gave a death stare, and Doctor Wexler seemed hardly phased. Where Dawn was a novice and new to every aggravating situation, the Little-trician had likely years of experience, dealing with Dawns a thousand times over.
“That sounds good,” James quickly interrupted the tension only Dawn was feeling. “We’ll make time. We’ll both be there.”
“Great! But don’t forget to bring Dawn too?” Doctor Wexler chuckled, and so did James. Laughing all at Dawn’s tired, angry, and frightened expense. “Oh, and as for times just let me know what works for you both. I’m sure we can make it fit. I imagine you’re out of work right now for this?”
“Thank you, I appreciate it,” James nodded.
“Of course! And Dawn, it was great getting to meet you!” she smiled at Dawn, and the Little was fighting the use of some very choice words. “And remember: Mom and Dad want what’s best for you, okay?”
“Yeah,” Dawn answered with a blank stare.
“The front desk will leave you with my number, and feel free to call me out of work hours. It might work better to have you both on the phone, so don’t be afraid if it’s sometime after she’s gone to bed.”
Great. More conversations that Dawn wasn’t allowed to hear. More stuff that she obviously wasn’t allowed to hear, yet no one was afraid about keeping that part a secret. She was just constantly being teased. Perpetually tortured.
“Thank you again very much, Doctor,” James shook her hand again and she smiled,
“It’s no trouble at all. I look forward to speaking with Mom, too! We’ll just call today sort of like a dry run or preliminary check. Like I said, we’ll schedule something soon. But other than that, I’m gonna get running to my next check-up! You can leave once you’re ready, but feel free to change her in here if you’d like. Bye!”
And with a small wave she left the room. Just James and Dawn.
“Ready to head back home?” James nonchalantly asked as he stood.
Furious crinkling was the answer. Examination paper crinkling, that is.
“Dawn? You okay?”
She made no reaction as she roughly tugged up her pants.
“...Wanna take a nap when we get home?”
“No.”
No. Fucking. Naps.
----------------------
Hey there! This chapter is a weird one. If you noticed, this read was slightly longer than a usual chapter. As in, like a longer length chapter plus half the size of another one. 1.5 chapter or so. (Kinda 1.75ish). Part of the length came from the chapter getting more ambitious. I wanted to include things that came before what I initially teased, but I wanted to fit that stuff in as well. But it did reach a point where I was like "I need to stop this," which easily could have been broken up into two chapters.
Also, I don't want to get bogged down in technical explanations, but I used Doctor Wexler as an opportunity to flex some of the pseudo-science or "Little studies" that this dimension has. AKA made-up justifications for why Littles are totally okay and meant to be babied. Let me know what you think about that sort of stuff, and regardless I hope this like everything else has been a fun read!
But if it wasn't clear already, do NOT expect this to be the typical chapter length. I just got carried away with this one.