"Okay, I'm convinced," (Patreon)
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Rebecca declared. "I guess I'll have to go with the Seelie option, since Unseelie sounds totally gross."
"Ain't nothin gross about guttin' your enemies," Burnside protested. "It's the beauty of nature! Fuma put all them organs in there for to be squished!"
"Yuck," Rebecca winced. "Just one question, Lord Ramble, before I commit. Can I still wear black?"
"Of course you can," I chuckled. "Being Seelie doesn't mean you can't be stylish or have fun. My old mentor Estvan is a shining example. He's one of the Seeliest elves I know and he still manages to pull off all kinds of mischief. If I can find a copy of the Foxspell of Saint Reynard, I'll let you study it. That's a compendium of wisdom and merry japes by an early devotee of Fuma. I think Estvan modeled himself after the Saint, but he did it right and managed not to turn Unseelie like the Vulpitanians did."
"What?" Rebecca asked with some perplexity.
"Oh, never mind," I said, shaking my head. "Just thinking out loud. We'll start your orientation soon, but first I have some business to conclude with Lysander."
"How much will your travel expenses be, plus the cost of an ant?" I asked the monkey, while probing with Elfmind to make sure he wouldn't cheat me.
"Is that your negotiating face?" he asked, nervously. "I have to tell you, it's quite unsettling."
"Just quote me a figure," I prompted him.
"I could probably get a decent ant for 3 gold, round trip coach fare will be another 3, and for 4 I could stay at the best inn in town," Lysander thought while tallying sums on his fingers. After a few seconds he declared, "Twenty gold will get me there and back with nothing left over, if I travel on foot and sleep in barns along the way."
"Nice try," I scoffed. "I happen to know that you can take a coach there and back for three gold, and even the finest accommodations won't run you more than four."
"You are remarkably well informed for someone who can't leave this forest," he muttered suspiciously. "However you're not taking into account the time away from my business, and how much that will cost me in missed sales."
I listened carefully and heard him thinking "It's the slow season here in Eire, but if I stock up on shoes I can probably unload them in Chimpenburg at a tidy profit."
"I will give you 14 gold pieces," I declared. "Before you go, buy up some of the shoe cult's stock as cheaply as you can and dispose of it on your journey, far away from here."
"DEAL," Lysander agreed, much more eagerly than I expected.
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