Home
Artists
Search
Recent
Random
Posts
DMs
Tags
Random
Importer
Import
FAQ
Account
Register
Favorites
Login
"Mmmm, it smells heavenly." (Patreon)
Content
"- I mean hellish," Rebecca murmured as I handed her a bowl of stew. "OHHH it's delicious," she added after her first mouthful. "Moss and bugs shouldn't taste this good! It's clearly a result of your dark powers, isn't it? I can feel its dark energy pulsing within me, taking me over and subsuming my will, replacing it with unholy desires! What was gross is now delicious! Pain is pleasure! Good is bad and bad is good!"
"It's just stew," I insisted. "I used unorthodox ingredients but it tastes good because I happen to be a good cook. Not because of evil."
"Aw, sugar, he's just bein' modest," Burnside chuckled. "Why don't you take a peek in yonder book?" She pointed to the copy of Ash's book, which Lysander had given me and I had tossed on the ground because I didn't want it.
"How to Be Unseelie and Look Good Doing It?" Rebecca read from the frontispiece. "How COOOL!! Unseelie means evil, right? Is this a dark grimoire? Full of instructions on how to wreak wickedness? Can I blight crops and curdle milk? Can I bring plagues? Cast curses on any who displease me? Grant me powers, Lord Ramble, and I will use them to make everyone fear me - and by extension, you. A new age of suffering and despair is at hand!"
"I like the way you think, gal," Burnside cackled. "You an' me are gonna be best friends."
"Wait a minute," Lysander protested. "I thought your little group was just a club for hairdressers. What's all this talk of spreading evil and despair? Is this actual witchcraft? I can't be part of that."
"You worked for Ash Marten," I pointed out. "Surely you know that he kills people."
"Only when it was necessary," Lysander clarified. "Ash is just looking out for his bottom line. He doesn't pull crazy stunts for the thrill of it. Everything he does is carefully considered, and always good for business. This is different. Giving powers of destruction to a teenage girl, that's reckless. I'll have no part of it. Give me the money for a sacrificial ant and I'll be on my way."
I could not deny that the monkey had a point. I definitely did not want a bunch of maniacs running around spreading Unseeliness in my name. That would pretty much prove Queen Edessa right, wouldn't it? I needed to nip this in the bud, and steer the conversation back toward a proper and Seelie course of action! But how?