"Are you kidding?" (Patreon)

I interrupted the monkey's whining tirade.  "I don't think you realize where you are nor who you're dealing with."

Lysander paused and looked around, while the trees rustled menacingly (which was a nice touch.)

"AY YI YI!" Lysander wailed, suddenly doubling over and clutching his knee.  "My knee!  You brutes have damaged my knee!  You're going to have to pay the cost of my surgery, as well as some hush money if you don't want me to alert the Guards to your activities here!"

"Forget it, you faker," I scoffed dismissively. "Nobody touched your knees, and you were only pretending to be unconscious earlier.  I saw how you suddenly sprang up when I mentioned the Crotch Punch of Life.  You're just trying to pull a fast one, to extort money from me.  I know how you lowfolk operate.  You're worse than Vulpitanians."

"LOWFOLK??" Lysander exclaimed indignantly.  "That, sir, is blatant Antipathy Speech!  Why, I'll have the, uh, the Non-Elvish Anti-Antipathy Guild come down on you so fast your head will spin!  You'll never do business in these woods again!  Unless of course you're willing to make amends immediately.  You'll find that I am a reasonable monkey.  I'm willing to forgive and forget, if the price is right."

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