"Who's over there?" (Patreon)

I yelled at the interloper.

"Way to go, Abner," somebody muttered scornfully as several rabbits emerged from the bushes.  "You cost us the element of surprise."

"I'm sorry," a rabbit (presumably Abner) mumbled as he wiped his nose.  "I can't help it!  I'm allergic to tulge!"  He sneezed violently, and it sounded like he was shouting "WITCHES!"

"Why did you let these troublemakers through?" I asked the trees subtly with Elfmind.

"What could we do to stop them?  They have agricultural implements and fire!"

I squinted into the undergrowth and noticed there were more rabbits further back, in the shadows.  Some of them, indeed, seemed to be holding torches.

"Rebecca!" the pitchfork-wielding rabbit yelled.  "You are in a heap of trouble, young lady!  You're coming home this instant!"

"No way, Dad!" Rebecca screeched back at him.  "Like I told you already, I'm done with Bunkirk!  These are my new friends and we're all going to serve the Evil One together!"

"Don't tell him that!" the cat with the long black hair hissed in alarm.

"WITCHES!!" Rebecca's dad bellowed.  "I knew it all along!  Come, brothers, let's put a stop to their evil ways!  We'll burn them alive and tear down this unholy circle of stones, and rescue that innocent girl they've trapped atop the dolmen for their hideous sacrifice!"

"That doesn't sound good at all," the sheep bleated.

"Being burned simply won't go with my look," Toby pointed out.

"YOU JUST TRY IT!" Rebecca yelled.  "I DARE YOU!  WE'LL TURN YOU ALL INTO NEWTS!"

"Lord Ramble," Oak beseeched me, "I brought these people here at your request.  If you intend to be a cult leader, DO SOMETHING!  Protect us from those horrible rabbits!"

I was already on it.  The moment that cretinous lagomorph had called me a little girl, my bow was out of my Elfintory and I was drawing a bead on his dumb rabbit heart.

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