Toy Giveaway to Patrons! (Patreon)

Hey, my most excellent dudes! Matt and I have amassed quite a stockpile of still-in-the-packaging toys that need homes. They need YOUR homes, specifically.
To express how deeply we appreciate (and survive on) your generous patronage, we're gunna be giving them away to our patrons with USA addresses!

Read the whole spiel and description of all the toys here, and if you're a patron with access to a USA address, go ahead and fill out this form right here to enter for the chance to win.

International patrons, I'm sorry you're not eligible for this giveaway! But YOU ARE NOT FORGOTTEN, I've got an idea for a print giveaway that will be totally open to you! So just hang on. 

In the meantime, here, you can go read about my new dishwasher. That's, like, the next best thing you can do after applying to win sex toys from a stranger on the internet :D