Yuri's Good / Bad Day (Patreon)

Back in January, Yuri had been so confident this was going to be his year. The year that he finally made something of himself. The year he would finally marry his long-term boyfriend. The year he would look back on fondly when he was an old man.

Instead, it had been the year from Hell. A year somehow worse than the shitshow that had been 2020? Yeah, that had come as a surprise to Yuri too. Not only was it very much not his year, but it also seemed as if the year itself had something of a vendetta against him. Anything that could go wrong did go wrong and with a few months left before January would roll around again, Yuri was absolutely struggling to keep the few remaining pieces of his life held together.

The latest of his miseries had been the abrupt departure of his boyfriend from his life. He and Louis had been dating since they were juniors in high school, and after seven years together they had finally gotten engaged. Now, just a year after that proposal, Louis was moving on with another guy. Yuri wasn’t just left with a broken heart though, as he was also the proud owner of an apartment he couldn’t afford the rent on and a job where he was ridiculed on a daily basis. Lucky me! As such, he could never quite be sure which was the cause of his frequent tears or if they were a result of everything added up. It was more than a little overwhelming, especially for a particularly sensitive soul like Yuri.

When he and Louis had moved from their small rural town in Oklahoma all the way to San Francisco, they had been certain that it would be the right scene for them. Unsurprisingly Louis had flourished and quickly made lots of friends but Yuri had struggled much more when it came to settling in. He was a naturally anxious person and conversation didn’t exactly come easy for him, so he always felt out of place amongst Louis’ highly social friends. They all had hundreds of thousands of followers on Instagram and pretty soon Louis’ profile had started to receive similar amounts of attention, while Yuri’s own follower count barely ever peaked past two-thousand. He wasn’t the type to post thirst traps like Louis and his friends did, so Yuri’s Instagram feed probably looked incredibly boring in comparison. “A boring profile suggests you have a boring life,” Louis had told him more than once. Yuri had taken those words to heart and begrudgingly accepted that he was simply a boring person. No wonder Louis had left him for a more outgoing guy!

Most of the time Yuri’s work at the San Francisco 49ers facility was a helpful distraction from the depressing reality of his love life. He worked as the team’s water boy and that meant he got to be on the sidelines for all of their games, something he relished, having been a big football fan since he was a kid. It was one of the few things he had been able to bond with his conservative father over; they hadn’t seen eye to eye when it came to Yuri’s sexuality but they were on the same page when it came to football.

Unfortunately work wasn’t always the easy breeze that Yuri had hoped for, as there were a handful of guys on the team and the coaching staff who viewed him as being lesser than them. Sure, he was earning about one-percent of what the players did, but that didn’t mean they were entitled to treat him like shit, right? He was as much of a human being as they were and he deserved respect no matter what his occupation was! Mercifully the vast majority of people that he worked with were friendly and approachable (when Yuri actually worked up the nerve to start a conversation, that was) but the ones who weren’t quite so open to engaging with him were as bad as any bully he had experienced back in high school.

By far the worst person to deal with during the work day was Nick Bosa, the star defensive end of the 49ers roster. It was no secret that he was held highly conservative political views - an amusing contrast to the mostly liberal team that was situated in one of the most liberal cities in an already liberal state - and while Nick had never been outwardly homophobic towards him, Yuri always felt like the other man’s dialogue in their brief exchanges was laced with a particularly cruel venom. The football player seemed to experience some sick delight in knowing that his words left Yuri feeling miserable. The waterboy knew that the logical thing to do was report Nick’s behaviour to his superiors but it seemed unlikely that anything would ever come of it: Nick was simply too important to the team’s potential success to suffer any meaningful repercussion.

Yuri’s latest encounter with the close-minded jock had been one of the most uncomfortable to date. It seemed like Nick had somehow learned about his recent breakup (perhaps having overheard Yuri lamenting to one of the coaching interns about it) and of course saw it as a great opportunity to make the young gay man feel like dirt once again. “I can imagine how heartbroken you must be, dude,” the athlete boomed, not even bothering to pretend to sound sympathetic. “A city full of gays and I’ve gotta feeling you’re still gonna struggle to find anyone who will stoop low enough to go on a date with a beta bitch waterboy. It’s heartbreaking stuff, truly.” The words caused a sharp stinging pain and tears threatened to spring up into Yuri’s eyes but he did his best to fight them back. He couldn’t let the other man see him cry, as Nick would surely never let him forget it. The absolute last thing he wanted to do was give the pig-headed jock more ammunition to use against him.

While it perhaps wasn’t the most scathing remark he’d ever had made against him, it was enough to finally send Yuri over the edge. He wasn’t tumbling into despair though but rather caving in to the desperate urge for revenge that had been bubbling under the surface for months. He craved for a way to make Nick regret ever messing with him and given San Francisco had a healthy magical community it didn’t seem all that impossible that Yuri might be able to get what he wanted. Whatever the cost was, it would surely be worth it if he got to wipe the smug grin off of Nick’s face even just once. The entitled jerk was simply that detestable!

As he had anticipated, it didn’t even take Yuri all that long to find somebody who was willing and capable to help him out, although they did warn him that his proposed plan didn’t come without risk. He was intending to send his consciousness into Nick’s body so he could get the arrogant football player into a number of compromising positions (with other men and photo evidence, of course) before leaving his body. Then, he’d use the incriminating pictures to force Nick into leaving him the hell alone. There was no doubt in Yuri’s mind that it would work; for a “straight and proud” asshole like Nick, the thought of anyone believing him to be gay might as well have been a death sentence.

The warlock who had agreed to help him was Nixon, an elderly man with a bald head and thick white moustache but green eyes that seemed to sparkle with youthful vigor. He was sympathetic to Yuri’s plight and even offered him a discount on various other spells he might be able to use to humble Nick, but the water boy had made his mind up. As much as he loathed the football player, there was a small part of Yuri that was excited by the notion of occupying that muscular body for a short while and he knew that Nick would be forever uncomfortable with the fact that his flesh had been worn by the team’s water boy. As such, Yuri insisted that they go along with his original plan, although it wasn’t without one final warning from Nixon...

“Possessions are a tricky thing, son. They aren’t always as reliable as we hope,” the warlock declared in a grave tone of voice, “They can be... temperamental. There’s a chance - a small one, mind you, but still a chance - that your spirit won’t be able to leave the other man’s body once it’s in there. You’ll be trapped in there for the rest of your days. That’s a mighty big price to pay.” Yuri sat and contemplated the old man’s words for a few minutes. Nixon wasn’t wrong when he said that it was a big price to pay, but honestly (and somewhat depressingly) it wasn’t as if Yuri would really be giving up all that much. Now that he and Louis were a thing of the past, he didn’t have much else going for him. Being sealed in the body of Nick Bosa wouldn’t exactly be the worst thing in the world, even if Yuri had no idea how to actually play football. He imagined that Nick’s body would have some sort of muscle memory that would help him succeed, if that ended up being the case. You’re getting ahead of yourself now. You’re probably going to be fine. Like he said, it’s only a small chance!

“Let’s do it,” the water boy stated firmly, handing over the envelope of cash to the old warlock. Nixon nodded and didn’t say anything else, instead he began to trace lines and shapes in the air and to Yuri’s amazement, a blue energy was left behind like ink on a page. Absolutely none of what he was seeing made any sense to Yuri, but he trusted in the process. As such, when Nixon told him to take a deep breath, he did so immediately, with a big smile spreading across his face. A second later though, the waterboy was understandably stunned when the warlock struck him square in the chest with such unimaginable force that Yuri was launched into the air!

As if that hadn’t been surprising enough though, he wasn’t dropping back down to the ground but rather floating through the wall of Nixon’s establishment and beginning to drift across San Francisco in all of its beautiful early morning glow. Glancing down at himself, Yuri was startled to find that he had lost his corporeal form and was instead made up of the same blue energy that Nixon had been tracing into the air around him. The spectral blue figure raced across the city at rapidly ascending speed until he finally reached the 49ers training facility. Dropping through the ceiling and right down into the locker room, Yuri attempted to slow himself down further but he had little control over himself; his speed seemed motivated by his excitement to slip into Nick Bosa’s flesh and use it for his own amusement for a little while.

There he is. It was little surprise that the athlete had his shirt off: Nick was always the first to strip down and the last to get dressed. Yuri had long envied the strong pecs and the firm abdominals of the man’s body and was thrilled at the concept that he’d finally get the chance to enjoy them for himself. That desire caused his speed to accelerate once more and the ghostly Yuri shot across the locker room as if he had been fired out of a cannon.

Unfortunately though, his last-second speed boost meant that Yuri had no way of diverting himself when another body stepped right into his route. The water boy had all of a split second to recognise what was about to happen before he slammed into the back of the unfortunate soul who had gotten in his way. The impact was sudden and jarring and a shiver immediately rocketed down Yuri’s spine as soon as he had settled into his new physical form. He felt so heavy all of a sudden which could probably be attributed to the sheer contrast from the previous weightlessness he’d had in his spirit form. It wasn’t just a physical heaviness that he was feeling though, as there was an emotional heaviness that came with the sudden awareness that he was in the wrong body! But who…

“What the fuck is that face for, Juice? You look constipated.” The unmistakable voice of Nick Bosa snapped Yuri out of his momentary daze and he glanced over to where the shirtless defensive end was scowling at him. While the attitude on display was only mildly better than Nick’s usual treatment of him, he’d actually offered Yuri some helpful information with that sharp remark. The nickname “Juice” could only mean one thing: Yuri had accidentally deposited himself in the body of Kyle Juscszyk, the team’s fullback and one of the nicest guys on the whole 49ers roster! He had always been friendly to Yuri whenever they talked and had even once told Nick to leave the water boy alone. He hadn’t been the intended target at all, in fact he was about as far from it as could be!

“Uh, nothing,” Yuri offered weakly in response, before reminding himself that he was now in a body that could potentially rival Nick’s own. He couldn’t shy away like a shrinking violet anymore! “I mean, chill the fuck out, Bosa. Stop being a locker room diva.” Yuri had little intention of sticking around to hear Nick’s response so he quickly hurried away to locate Kyle’s locker. Waiting there was all of his training gear, including his pads and helmet, but it was the mirror that attracted Yuri’s attention first.

Kyle was an incredibly handsome man, there was no denying that, and as the water boy experimentally raised his arms to hit a double bicep flex, it was clear as day that the fullback put a lot of work into maintaining his strong body too. Being in Kyle’s body was a definite mistake but it wouldn’t be the end of the world to occupy it until he could get back across the city to Nixon, who would surely help him fix the error. Of course, that meant getting through a day of football practice first, but how hard could that really be?

It turned out that a day of football practice was actually much harder than Yuri had anticipated. Prior to his early beliefs, it didn’t matter what muscle memory remained with the body he was now possessing, it was still on him to perform at a professional level and that wasn’t exactly an easy thing for a rookie to do. He wasn’t sure that he’d ever sweat so much in his life - all of his clothes were drenched and clinging desperately to the hard muscles of Kyle’s body! Those same muscles throbbed with agony due to the intense workout they had been put through, and Yuri craved for nothing more than a full twelve hours of sleep. How the hell did the players do this every single day?! They’re genetic freaks, Yuri decided, Or masochists. Maybe both. It was the only feasible explanation for why anybody would put themselves through such physical stress.

It had been little surprise to Yuri when the coach reprimanded “Kyle” for being sloppy during drills and he’d even had to report to the team’s doctor to get checked out for a concussion! They hadn’t found any proof of a head injury during the inspection but it had been an incredibly tense experience for Yuri, and he was relieved when the coach and doctor both agreed to let him go home early. Of course, Yuri wasn’t actually planning to go home but rather to visit Nixon who would hopefully pull him out of Kyle’s body and get him into Nick’s, where he was supposed to be. He felt bad for showing Kyle up at practice but he definitely wouldn’t feel the same for Nick - he deserved every bit of humiliation he could get!

Upon arriving back at Nixon’s establishment though, Yuri was surprised to find himself being heavily admonished by the warlock for his perceived foolishness. “I knew you weren’t ready for this sort of magical responsibility,” the old man huffed, “Damn my greed and need to pay rent on this blasted place. When will I learn that even money isn’t worth dealing with rash fools like you?” The remarks wounded the water boy, but considering he needed the warlock’s help, Yuri stood there and took the abuse until Nixon’s rant had finished.

“Will you help me fix this?” he asked gently, his broad shoulders slumped and arms folded in a subconscious attempt to look smaller and more vulnerable. Considering the size of his muscular body though, it could hardly be considered a success. Still, the old warlock sighed once more and nodded. “Thank you, thank you, thank you!”

For the second time that day Nixon began drawing strange patterns in the air around Yuri, but this time the energy left behind was red rather than blue. As he continued, Nixon’s heavily wrinkled face dropped into an expression of confusion and then concern. “Oh but of course,” the old man murmured to himself, “Perhaps if I try… no, that won’t work. What a mess!”

“What is it?” Yuri asked, his heart beginning to thump in his beefy chest. Somehow he knew what the answer would be before the words had left the warlock’s lips, although they weren’t any easier to accept.

“You’re locked in, son. I can’t pull you out of that body without killing the both of you,” Nixon confirmed in a grave voice. “I’m sorry, kid. There’s nothing I or anyone on this plane of existence can do for you now. We’ve well and truly fucked things up here.”

The sinking feeling in Yuri’s stomach was unlike anything he had ever felt before. His whole world felt like it was fracturing around him, even more so than it had when Louis had first dumped him, and he knew that it was all his fault. He had willingly walked into a nightmare and landed himself in some serious trouble, all at the expense of somebody who was actually a decent guy. Kyle Juszczyk had done nothing but be friendly towards him and now Yuri had practically written the guy out of existence and replaced him, with no hope of restoring things to how they were!

Oh my god, I’m a terrible person. The gravity of the situation was starting to unload on Yuri all at once. He has a wife… What the hell am I going to do? I can’t just ruin his marriage too, can I? Oh I am definitely going to Hell. Not only that but it even seemed like his torment at Nick’s hands wouldn’t be ending, as his new teammate had already made it abundantly clear that he didn’t shy away from tormenting the other athletes in the locker room either. His plan had reached a catastrophic ending and the only person who ended up better off for it was Nick Bosa, the one person who it had been intended to punish! Somewhere in the back of his head, a snide voice made its presence known: That’ll teach you to mess with magic, waterboy!

One Week Later…

“I’m gonna get this win for you, Juice, don’t you worry,” Yuri murmured under his breath as he glanced around the packed stands of the stadium. While his former career as a waterboy meant that he was no stranger to the roaring crowds, he had never before been the subject of their admiration. As he approached the sidelines a familiar chorus broke out among the 49ers fans: “JUICE!” It sent a shiver down Yuri’s spine, but it also awoke a familiar pang of guilt within him. All week, he had struggled with the knowledge that his impatience had effectively killed the real Kyle Juszczyk. That wasn’t something that could sit right with any man, let alone an individual who had experienced Kyle’s kindness firsthand. As such, Yuri had decided that it was his duty to continue the man’s life as best as he could. 

That was much easier said than done, especially considering Yuri didn’t have any football experience, but the deeper pockets he now had as a professional athlete came in handy. He had been able to pay Nixon to cast a few more spells for him with the intention of making the transition from Yuri to Kyle a little smoother. The old warlock hadn’t been too pleased with him, but the promise of a larger paycheck eventually won him over. As such, Yuri had been magically gifted with the athletic ability and football knowledge that he needed to convincingly play the role of a veteran fullback. While he perhaps wasn’t as fluid as “Juice” normally was, he was slowly getting more comfortable out on the field. That didn’t stop Nick Bosa from continuing to be an asshole, but his teammate’s shitty behaviour had become the least of Yuri’s worries, all things considered. It seemed abundantly clear that nothing short of divine intervention would tame the other man’s awful attitude, but it was at least more manageable now that Yuri was no longer dwarfed by the other man’s size. Any sort of physical conflict between them would at least be a little more matched, should it come to that.

The next spell (and the much more costly one) wasn’t for the benefit of his performance in the field, but rather in the bedroom. Kyle’s wife had noticed something different about her husband immediately upon his return to the home on that fateful day where his plans had gone to hell. Unsurprisingly, the very gay Yuri had struggled to be convincingly intimate with the woman who had known Kyle best. Nixon had initially been ethically opposed to using his magic to switch Yuri’s sexuality, but the former waterboy had insisted. He had already been responsible for ending Kyle’s opportunity to live his own life, which severely weighed upon his conscience. He wasn’t about to be responsible for the end of the Juszczyk marriage too. Throwing an extra zero on the end of his monetary offer had finally won Nixon over, and in the days since then Yuri hadn’t been quite so awkward in his interactions with new wife.

While Yuri truthfully hadn’t exactly been delighted at the thought of giving up his homosexuality to become a straight man, the previous few days had reassured him that he’d made the right choice. Although it was a little strange to find himself aroused by the female form all of a sudden, and to not feel any attraction to the muscular bodies surrounding him in the locker room, it wasn’t really all that bad. Besides, it was nice to have somebody that was actively rooting for him to succeed, as it seemed clear in hindsight that Louis had only ever had his own interests at heart. Kyle’s wife was different though; she looked at Yuri as if he was the sun, and he genuinely wanted to make her happy. 

Meeting the woman in question on the sideline, Yuri wrapped an arm around her and brought her in for a brief kiss. Adoration flooded through the man as his wife pressed a delicate hand against his chest and whispered a quick message of luck into his ear. The game was about to start and the pressure was on for the 49ers to secure a win and start turning their miserable season around. For Yuri though, the chance at scoring a win meant so much more than anyone in the crowd would ever know. He had something to prove, not just to himself, but also to his teammates, his wife and most importantly, the man he had unwittingly replaced. He wasn’t going to let any of them down!