More Tattoos Soon (Patreon)

You know, my Ma always used to say that I'd ruin my body if I ever got a tattoo. I told her that was bullshit back then and I can happily say that my younger self was right because look at me now! There ain't nobody who can say I'm ruined, not with a body like this!

The trick to getting a good tattoo is finding the right artist and there's nobody out there more talented than Malia Krafter, I'm tellin' you now! When I say she worked magic on me you wouldn't believe how literally I'm talkin'! I picked out a simple tribal tattoo and she made it - and me - damn special. I didn't even feel any pain, in fact the ink pen against my skin felt like pure bliss and by the time Malia was done I was a whole new man!

Well, don't take that "new man" part too literally. I've still got my face and voice and name and all that jazz but my body? Well the old disappointing lump is gone and replaced by the body I deserved all along! Ripplin' muscles in place of the soft beer gut I earned back in college were the highlight and I had no incentive to ever cover up my chest again. Wearin' clothes would be a goddamn sin when I'm this cut!

I bet you're not surprised when I tell you I'm plannin' to go back for another tattoo from Malia soon. I just gotta think what I want because even though I'm pretty damn impressive to look at, there's always more improvements she could help me make! In the meantime though, if you're thinkin' of getting some ink then hit up Malia Krafter - you won't regret it!