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...just to shake things up a bit.  There's going to be a lot of talking heads in the next four or so pages, and it's been a while since we've seen any bondage in this story.

Not sure how I feel about it, but I think it definitely adds something.  Let me know your thoughts.

Also, thanks for all the comments about the dialogue.  There's some concern about Meg saying that her job is to make the sub say "Red".  A good criticism that will be addressed on the following page.  I'll ask you guys about it again when I finish the LUNCH comic.  If you still think it might be an issue I'll rework it then.

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Comments

Anonymous

I’m okay with this!

kou32

Okay, the changes to the dialogue are good. This sounds a lot better, I'm still kind of iffy on the "make them say red thing" but like you said Meg is going to explain the proper usage of the signals to Ellie next page and that makes me feel better. I'm guessing this is how Meg likes to do things, puts on a Privado then once she sees them still interested, then she explains the importance of safety and trust.

kou32

As for the talking heads thing, I personally don't have a problem with several pages of just Meg and Ellie talking. That being said, I also don't have a problem with bondage images of Meg's previous sessions while she and Ellie are talking. I like this one, it definitely grabs your attention because reasons 😀. So maybe have a variety? Like have this page with the previous session, but the next page is just the two of them talking, because it's important information on safety and our attention should be on them for that.

Michael

I know what you mean about talking heads. I've had that problem scripting my comics too. It's never easy to strike the right balance but for my money you seem to have a pretty good handle on it

jukehero461

Sexy and helps vary the images, what's not to love?

Shrub Jump

MUCH Better! :)