Home Artists Posts Import Register

Downloads

Content

00:00:00 - intro

00:05:57 - My professor is pressuring me to do drugs, and I need to stay in their good graces.

00:27:32 - My partner does online sex work and I have anxiety over how this might affect my prospective political career.

00:43:07 - I'm 25, a woman, and I've never dated and at this point, I don't know where to start.

Comments

Nathan P

woah

Jordan Staigmiller

Everything is safe behind the pay wall guys don't even worry. Your anti-white rapper racism is a secret I'll take to the grave

Deepto Chatterjee

As someone who is involved in math academia, that first story would be huge if true. It sounds like they're saying they recently won the Fields medal or breakthrough prize or something, so that's like one of very few, very well known people. If it came out that they were pressuring students to take narcotics as part of their studentship, it would be massive news. It would either get buried by the university or the professor would be fired instantly (their tenure would not save them). If you're reading this, faux Will Hunting, I hope you blow the whistle on this shit cause this is not acceptable at all. If you can't find the strength to do it, try to switch advisors and make up a reason. I know the risks seem similar, but it is probably the best avenue to take if you want to continue your PhD at your university and don't want to make a stink. About what Slime is saying, academia is still fucked up right now, but it is much less common that one professor in particular has completely dominating power over a subfield. I don't think this guy will be fucked if he blows the whistle; they could probably find another advisor at another university who's still very good and won't shun them.

Deepto Chatterjee

Also along the lines of what Slime recommended, if you're not comfortable going to other faculty then talk to other PhD students about it. They might know what's going on and they're not gonna fuck you over

Keaton

Bro 100% needs to report this shit

Maddy Keating

PHD Pill Guy for serious, gather some evidence like recording this interaction on your phone discretely and report this to the Dean and talk about it with your fellow students—this shit it crazy bananas and not normal or chill

skillsw

Also an academic -- if the advisor in question is an academic on the level of a Fields recipient, the university would absolutely bury everything involved. Reporting officially is definitely the right thing to do, but also very plausibly a career killer depending on how well liked they are (as opposed to simply how much prestige the advisor has).

asdasdasd

Moderately below the level of the Fields medal. I just want to remark that I did not say I belong to pure mathematics---I simply belong to a discipline that uses math. Naturally, this leaves open millions of possible fields. I say this because I am trying to conceal my identity as best as possible. I know that no one has any reason to respect the following request (because I chose to throw my fun lil situation into the aether), but I would greatly appreciate if we could limit speculation on what the "important award" may be. After all, guessing a particular award is equivalent to guessing who the recipient is, which would nearly amount to guessing my identity.

skillsw

Yeah, absolutely fair. I was just using it as a measuring stick, but it definitely makes sense to not talk about that too much. For what little it's worth, you have my sympathy. It's a very tough spot to be in; academia is a fucking nightmare to navigate for things like these. A lot more grad students have horror stories like these than most realize, but yours is especially nasty. I think the advice of having a surreptitious recording is good if the advisor ever says anything damning outright when you pass on taking the drug, and it might be worth very gently building a network of people among the faculty that would be in position to stand against the advisor (meaning ideally either well-established faculty at your university or well-regarded visiting faculty if available). The more you have in terms of evidence and connections, the less likely you are to get a genuinely bad result. Whatever you decide to do, though, best of luck.

rory montreuil

Was in the sauna when the name “Professor Lambo” was uttered and I just lost it in front of like 6 dudes 😭

iggy

bro just secretly film or record the guy trying to give you the pill and blackmail him

jenny

it's so funny how girls think guys have it easier dating, and vice versa 😭😭 like i've always seen my guy friends in and out of relationships and assumed it was easier

Chris Cole

It's pill time pussy

Chris Cole

but on a serious note.. if you are in that type of situation, then you shouldn't assume they only do this to you. If you have the courage to speak up you might be saving someone else from being put in that position. Easier said than done though. A important factor is being exact with what is being said to you and the implications being made. Writing it down and establishing a record would be the first step.

Deepto Chatterjee

Don't think it really matters but R1 is a tier of research prestige for universities (R1 is the highest) and affects how much funding universities tend to get from government organizations such as the National Science Foundation

Andrew Miller

Making a hard read on the pill story. Shit sounds completely made up. Like finding out what the pill is. I can find a pill off of just the shape and color on Google and even faster if it has an inscription. I'm not gonna go into detail about other little details that sounded weird bc honestly no one cares and I don't either really, but just wanted to plant my thought seed into the world. If it is true that's crazy af and you need to write a movie script. I'm watching that on release

Andrew Miller

My take is that they just watched good will hunting. They know a lot of terminology relative to college and the sort. And have a wild imagination. And the cherry on top of my conspiracy theory is they are 15 and Netflix just put goodwill hunting back on

brenna

My advice for the phd dude is to make up an excuse. Like say you need to know what it is bc you started a new medication and don’t know how it will interact. Then you can either go with it once you figure out what it is or say the drug interaction will kill you. Or bring your own shit next time. The prof might just not want to be going alone but needs some shit to get his brain going so you can “condone” his thing by doing your own thing (or pretending you are) without having to take the same shit as him.

Chance Roberson

About the pill, how is this legal. If this was me, I’d somehow get record of this happening and report it to the people at the school

Bailey Cook

You should get concrete evidence of being provided the pill to defend yourself if needed.

Becca

Why doesn’t this person just say they’re doing sober January or 75 hard or something?? Like there’s gotta be SOME way to deny it that isn’t just “no thanks”

Jaded Kills

To the first dude: 1. If you are in a one party consent state I 100% believe you should start secretly recording your sessions. 2. Think of the advice you’d give a girl your age in the same scenario being pressured by a professor to take a mystery pill. Likely you’d say that’s an incredibly dangerous situation to be in even if she THINKS she’s probably safe. That doesn’t change just bc it’s two men.

Jaded Kills

To be clear I’m not saying record just to blackmail or whatever. If something happens you will have proof. For example if you continue to refuse and he says it’s not okay or tries to ruin your career proof is KEY since he’s well known.

Andrew Zick

Professor question: If you have a grad student union, contact them. Immediately. This is what unions are for. You can be vague at first about a professor forcing you to do something. Union contract should have some protection against retaliation. Your future career is by no means guaranteed but *hand wave* you might be able to be guaranteed funding to finish your PhD because of being put in this situation.

jodie

Shoutouts to the person who submitted the third question, because as someone in an almost identical position, the advice made me realise that all I really need is an extra voice occasionally reminding me that everything starts by someone just shooting the shit and seeing what happens. And if it doesn't work out, it's probably better off in the long run anyway. Also appreciated the vulnerability in sharing that lurking "is it me?" feeling that comes with rejection and getting older. Can make you feel a little delusional at times, so I appreciate how you guys addressed that. Hope the person originally writing in can find their feet and enjoy the ride too.👍