Swansong (Patreon)

Weapon (shortsword), rare (requires attunement)

You have a +1 bonus to attack and damage rolls made with this magic weapon. In addition, you gain proficiency in performance checks while attuned to this weapon. If you are already proficient, you gain expertise.

Swansong forces the wielder to dance gracefully across the battlefield. Before making an attack with this weapon you must make a DC 17 performance check. On a success, you have advantage on the attack as Swansong praises your beauty and grace. On a failure you have disadvantage on the attack as Swansong berates you for your oafishness. If you roll a 25 or above on a performance check made while attacking with this weapon, the attack is considered a critical hit. If it is already a critical hit, triple the damage dice instead. If you roll a natural 1, Swansong deals 2d8 psychic damage to you as punishment for embarrassing it.

Sentience. Swansong is a sentient neutral good weapon with an Intelligence of 12, a Wisdom of 10, and a Charisma of 16. The weapon communicates telepathically with the attuned creature, complimenting you on successful performance checks and reprimanding you for any failure. If you miss an attack after a successful performance check, Swansong reassures you, stating that despite your failure you moved beautifully.

This elegant sabre demands excellence from those who dare to wield its glorious power. This sword has been imbued with the soul of a lethal dance instructor. Those who can take the blade’s strong criticism and perform gracefully in battle are rewarded with increased battle prowess. Those who are less elegant will find their pride shattered by the sword’s harsh words.

“That was beautiful darling, now pirouette!” - Swansong

“I truly, deeply hate you.” - Garthakk, Half-Orc Barbarian