Devil Side Stories: Rias Gremory: Li Song. (Patreon)

Devil Side Stories: Rias Gremory: Li Song.

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Wordcount: 1250

Commissioned by Blue Flaming Wings. 

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Look at him.

The normie of normies, Li Song, stands before one of the sacred shrines of my people. His disguise is well made, probably by one of the cute, Homunculi maids that serve him and the rest of the Preservers, but he is undoubtedly in front of my favorite figurine shop… judging the most recently released figure of Crystal Ella Stella’s epynomous heroine Ella in all her Crossbow Template form, which in reality is a super rare genderbent, pale, and loli version of Crossbow from Class-Sun’s famous work Destiny/Still Dawn.

When activated, the holographic projector at its base projected the iconic fight scene where it fights against Rapier Derivative in the climax of the first season of Crystal Ell Stella completely. The entire fight scene was meticulously recreated in 3D Holograms, with the VAs working hard with new technology so their lines could be heard easily from any angle after it began playing. The hologram of Rapier Derivative was also meticulous and rumored to be the herald of her own Crystal Ella Stella figurine, which shall undoubtably connect with Ella’s so that the two figurines could do battle against one another with only holographic assistance. 

It is a masterpiece figure of high renown that will easily fetch tens of thousands of Credits in the future.

Surely, Li Song has come out of hiding to purchase it and validate my existence as a Destiny/Still Dawn fan—

Wait.

W-wait!

Why are you walking away from the glorious piece of art, Li Song?

Oh no. My outburst has attracted his attention. He turns to me in his disguise, nowhere close to his typical gloriousness, but I already know that I cannot withstand the coming assault.

“Hm?” Kuh! Just one syllable and my heart has been pierced by fearsome, magnitude 10 normie levels! Regret over my chosen lifestyle, at every Credit spent on Gacha and figurines, threatens to swallow my entire existence. His cool blue eyes peer into my soul, free of any judgement whatsoever, thus I am left to judge myself. I come up lacking in every respect as a living being. My existence isn’t even equal to a bug in his presence. “Oh, Gremory-san! I’m glad to see you. Would you like to join me in evaluating gifts for Hyoudou? He has requested that I look into the newest shipments for something he can purchase with his newfound finances.”

Thank goodness I’m not into BL, because those words would’ve killed me dead. Still, since I am a cultured individual who understands the bonds of male friendship through combat and sports, I am left breathless and amazed by the words I hear. 

Li Song… is scouting for Issei, disregarding his reputation as a normie, so that his friend could happily buy genderbent, loli, and pale versions of male characters with deep backstories.

My heart would have burst if I was into BL, but I manage to rally.

Li Song and I might only be friends through Issei and Aria… but doesn’t that fact make this moment perfect!?

“Hah! I knew that Issei was trying to keep up with me! Normally, we otaku don’t help each other amass better collections, but since he and I are such good friends, I’ll be more than willing to help!” I wasted no time. Normie of Normie-kun’s presence was starting to fade away and those in the shadows, yearning for the Class-Sun’s figurine, were beginning to leave the shadows. I swiftly purchased the figurine and marked it for home delivery. “There! Li Song, your first choice was already the best in the store and was about to be poached! Praise me for I have secured the one figurine Ise would’ve bawled his eyes out if he hadn’t been able to purchase!”

My words were bombastic and over-the-top for comedic reasons… but Li Song decided to clap!

For me!

Li Song was clapping!

“Such decisiveness should always be applauded. It means that you know Hyoudou very well in order to act with such speed and precision.” Goodness. So, this is what it feels like to be properly praised by a stranger. Aria was nice about my hobby, just like the rest of my family, while Ise was an Otaku himself. While Li Song didn’t understand the item… he understood that I was great at my hobby and being a friend to Ise. I think… I think that I’m melting from how warm I feel… and it’s not because of something lewd, too! This must be what wholesome feels like IRL. “I’m happy to have asked for your help and I thank you for it. However, if you have time to spare, I’d like more assistance in spending Hyoudou’s budget.”

He smiled at me warmly while showing me the merits Ise gained from all his hard work at the front line.

Guh!

Wholesome feelings.

A massive budget to spend on ecchi figurines.

Making Issei happy.

This… this was going to be the start of a beautiful friendship!

“Oh, but I thought we were already friends, Gremory-san?”

God, I know you hate Devils, but please accept my thanks for your part in creating this living, breathing cinnamon bun protagonist and having him grace my life. 

Amen.

Ow. 

Worth it.

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A pretty maid with blonde drills gave me a smile while serving me tea, as our purchases for Ise were all perfectly arrayed on a new shelf. I perfectly positioned its existence to be right above his desk, behind a tall shelf next to his door. When he wakes up in the morning, getting off his morning, his figurines shall be in the corner of his eye. When people open the door to tell him something, their existence shall be obscured from view. 

The shelf also had in-built, wireless energy transfer to make sure that each figurine could properly act out their scenes and call out their lines. I paid for it out of pocket, as a gift for Ise, and Li Song had fetched the wood that made it from Earth. The shelf could also lower itself to be upon Ise’s desk, so that he can interact and clean his figurines without risking them falling off from the high shelf. 

If Li Song and I could achieve such a miraculous, forum-worthy creation in half-an-hour for Ise, I tremble what we can do in the future for our mutual, best friend. 

“Indeed, I look forward to helping you in the future, Gremory-chan.” Li Song smiled again. I was building up a resistance, but that only allowed me to return the attack with a tenth of its original power. However, a tenth of the Normie of Normie’s Smile Power is enough to make most girls turn into quivering messes, so I took what I could get as an Otaku. “Thank you for your help today and let us drink to a prosperous partnership in the future.”

We raised our tea together and dined. For the first time, I enjoyed showing off all the little tea etiquette things that I was taught, because Li Song praised me properly for all my actions. Really, I didn’t know what Aria was talking about him being someone to be wary about. Ise would never talk to someone dangerous and evil, so why did she have to be so paranoid about Li Song?

Sure, I might be putting everything about him being Ise’s friend… but what was the problem with that?

If everyone thought of me as only as one of the Gremory twins, I’d feel pretty bad.

I’m sure that if Li Song knew that someone acknowledged him for just being a good friend to someone… he’d pretty happy!

Sure, a lot of relationships are deep and complex, but we were going to get along fine just wanting our best friend to be happy!