Interview With a Solosexual: ssxpsm (Patreon)

How many hours do you spend a day masturbating?

Hey, it’s damn lucky I've got this awesome masturbation spreadsheet in front of me!   My average hours masturbating per day since October 2017 is 4.2.   Recently, I've gotten even more masturbatory, reaching 50 hrs a week not long ago, 44 hours last week, and probably 41 hours this week.  So about 6 hrs/day. Of course, there are professional masturbators who far far exceed my addiction, many of them. Gotta do better…

When did you first try Albolene?

I was a lifelong vaseline bator, shows my age, I guess. Just checked:  Abolene’s been around since 1885 — dunno why I never knew about it until maybe 10 years ago. LOL shoulda bought stock in the company!  After all, tons of bators are buying it these days.  Every time I buy a jar at the drug store, I chuckle to myself & wonder what the clerks think — “why the fuck are so many men buying Abolene these days?"

Are there ever vintage scenes that you wish you could watch again (Digitally remastered)?

Sure!  Tons!  Will Seagers was hot waaay back when, bated to him & his vids 100’s of times. Long ago lost those VHS tapes,  but look at this! Now preserved as permanent internet porn:

  https://www.mansurfer.com/gay-porn-star/Will+Seagers/

You managed to become a solosexual w/out any guidance but if you had the solosexual label growing up, how would that have impacted the way you viewed your handhumping desires?

Damn! I’ve thought about this many times since discovering LOSERS and other groups on BW. The trailblazing books & Tumblrs/Twitters by M.B. Timothy (melbournebator), Jason Armstrong (wildhorse100) and others, completely opened my eyes. What I'd actually lived for a lifetime was a THING!  A handful of deeply addicted solosexuals/masturbators I've met — including you, InducedPriapism, have helped clarify all this.   Although I never understood my sexuality at all back then, I wouldn't change a thing.  You have no idea, really, of how intense my masturbations were since puberty and for all those decades.

I escaped the world.  I was 100% virgin until age 26.  No touching, no sex, nothing with anyone, male or female. Just me, naked, with my penis and a strong, relentless curse to masturbate masturbate masturbate. God, the mirrors & porn & perversions!  Me all alone.  Nobody expecting a thing, always with a smile on my face, living moment to moment, hand on erect penis.  Nobody censuring Penis (who is very very p*rverted, alone), chasing whichever diabolical & degenerate ideas that popped into my deviant penisbrain. Executing them with enthusiasm, hidden alone with my fantasies rolled out, video-taping myself as much as i could, hours & hours — awesome!  Decades of that. 

 I grew up w/o access to porn, unless you call men’s underwear pix in the Sears catalog or naked greek statues in World Book porn.  Masturbation itself was my turn-on (as well as myself, there in the mirror).  Before the internet, there was NO porn unless you found it at home — my house was sexually repressed, brothers but never saw them naked, Dad didn’t have porn.  I didn't even know about the dirty bookstores where I grew up!  I was 20 before I came across my first porn mag.   My serious masturbation addiction, of course, later led to serious porn addiction.  Two sides of the same coin.  Most chronic masturbators today see porn first,   they masturbate to it, but it’s the internet porn addiction they fight.  My fight was with masturbation addiction.  Had i known i was a ’solosexual’, that would have implied a connection to some solosexual community, which had it existed would have deviated my sexual path.  Would I be any happier today had I been exposed to the zeitgeist of solosexuality back then?  Dunno.  I really doubt it.  God but I had FUN masturbating alone, ignorant, all those decades!

Could I ask you what it was like going through the HIV/AIDS crisis as a solosexual?

Good question, loser! Ancient history to you Gen Z’ers. the solosexual/pornosexual zeitgeist of course didn’t exist -- damn, gay rights barely existed! Hubby & I met as masturbators & often went to gay dirty movie theaters together. I went there solo too -- a LOT more than him. HIV decimated the community, of course, including many of our friends. I still did suck/fuck — it was just assumed it was standard sex for f@gs. I never fucked and only rarely got fucked (hip disease at puberty made missionary really difficult). I HATED cocksucking, either way. (licking dark thick pubes, on the other hand…lol). 95% of my sex then was solo masturbation — at home of course, but also basements, parking garages, parks, city streets at night, elevators, always solo. 

God, the HOURS I stroked myself! Tons of porn — HIV shot up the VHS porn being consumed, that's for sure. Hubby's job meant he was gone every other week. I'd work hard on my career & late hours, then bate bate bate, alone at home. Had absolutely NO idea there was anyone else like me in the entire world. As we lost good friends to HIV, Hubby & I eventually got tested. Negative for both. Given HIV, J/O clubs started here.

I often went, usually got buck naked, and stayed for hours. ’Normal’ f@gs at J/O clubs looked at masturbation as a distant second option, almost as if forced. I reveled in it. so i got through all those decades totally masturbatory, loved loved loved my chronic penis & porn addiction. at the end: HIV neg.

How’d you and your Husband meet?

The Circle J was renowned for masturbators. It's what brought hubby to SF that fatefull Memorial Day weekend decades ago, from the midwest. I am from Seattle. We met by total chance on a Friday night, bated together. On vacation both of us. Made no other plans. Saturday, we both independently showed up. hot hot bate again. Sunday, my brother invited me over to dinner at 5pm. fuuuck, I thought! Gotta bate again. So I went to the Circle J early Sunday afternoon. Guess who the fuck was there?! My future husband! Finally, we talked, exchanged info (no fucking cell phones back then, idiot!). He came to Seattle in August that same year. The rest is history. https://www.ebar.com/news///236538

Did you have any survivors' guilt or anything after finding out how HIV was transmitted?

I suppose so, none of us had any control of HIV back then, why were some struck and died terrible deaths and others of us were spared? Yeah, that was hard. Losing great friends when we were all so young? Horrible. The pain associated with my hips and the disease I fought in my teens — well, getting fucked just didn’t work for me. Life is capricious:  the hip pain I hated in my teens may well have saved me from HIV later on.

Did the HIV/AIDS crisis prepare you at all for the current pandemic?

Yeah, probably, but so did just getting older. Shit happens. Deal with it.

Do you think the quarantine played a part in further developing the Bator community?

Absolutely! This last year + oceans of porn + working from home = tons more bators. Masturbation really is the BEST sex!

If you had one message to tell the next generation of Bators, what would it be?

The most important message:  Be proud & have fun

Apart from that, just the obvious ones — listen, really listen, to your Penis, Accept that being a chronic masturbator is a true & valid 21st century option.  Penis sex is real sex.  If Penis erects for anything that adults do together sexually (or alone), explore it, stroke it, make it fun. Chastity? Filth? Smoking? Mirrors?  BDSM? Satanism? Exhibitionism?  Fetishes?  Nofap?  Run with whatever erects you.

For all types of adult porn -- everything adults do together consensually or alone is cool & can be hot… If that’s what Penis wants you to be — violate conventional rules as long as you aren’t messing with someone’s life.   Normal is relative.  Almost certainly, nobody you know is actually normal.  Be safe — masturbate chronically, obsessively, and as much as you crave to, but always make the rest of your life work too. You’ll be old someday, loser. Even old masturbators can be happy and devoted to penis, porn, & masturbation.

Some dont’s:

-Don’t be stupid, make your life work.

-Don’t be unkind, we’re a community of bators, few understand us, so be good bate bros to each other.

-Don’t judge, today’s sexual turn-off may very well be your next hot fetish.