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“Listen, and understand. That goose is out there. It can’t be bargained with. It can’t be reasoned with. It doesn’t feel pity, or remorse, or fear. And it absolutely will not stop, ever, until you are dead.” - Kyle Reese, renowned goose hunter

Geese are no laughing matter. These horrible beasts stalk ponds, parks, and the sky, looking for unsuspecting prey. Their mouths are nightmare fuel filled with rows of teeth and serrated tongues (wtf?). Even the boldest adventurers–ones who are able to stand up to the might of a nautiloid full of mindflayers, a portal spilling the denizens of the Abyss, or even the dreaded tarrasque–turn and run when face against one of those Gods-forsaken creatures.

Take my advice. You see one of these things? Run.

If you see more than one? Well, you’re already dead, mate.

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Comments

Anonymous

I'm using the goose in a special christmas one-shot, where I have titled him "Krampgoose"

JessF

OMG, this out of all the monsters in the page made me LOL so hard..

JessF

Just try killing this Christmas Goose...