Taming A Jerk - Ch. 4 (Box Shaped Heart Side Story, Patreon Exclusive) (Patreon)

Chapter Four - Alex The Jerk

If anyone had asked him, he would have had a lot of trouble explaining why he felt like shit as he went to work the next day. He had been through the motions with Aron, had done everything in the book to show he was still a loving husband, except that he had settled for giving the guy a blow job since solely the idea of Aron fucking his childhood friend was making him grind his teeth and cross his legs.

Aron had eventually played along and hadn’t complained. But that hadn’t made him feel less of a fraud. He had tossed and turned for the entire night, which was so no like him. For his beauty sleep, he could force himself to sleep in a room on fire or with music blasting on the biggest speakers available.

A look in the mirror had been enough to tell him he looked like hell, too. So everything he felt on the inside was reflecting on the outside, and that wasn’t good. That wasn’t good at all.

“Hey, Alex,” Simon almost startled him as he hurried to keep the door so that Alex could enter. “What’s with you?” the guy murmured, pretty stunned with Alex’s raccoon eyes, by all appearances.

“Trouble sleeping,” Alex replied and hung his head low as he went through the door.

Simon hurried after him.

“Is everything okay? At home?” the guy asked, apparently bent on harassing him.

Alex stopped and took a long look at Simon. There was absolutely no proof of ill intent in those bright eyes. So Simon was a good guy, too. Just like Aron. How come he could not just focus on looking at the guy and seeing a walking wallet, like before? 

Obviously, something was very wrong with him. The scary thing was that he could not tell what it was. Or he was afraid to admit it. Feeling like such a stranger in his own life was not - could not be - only Carter’s fault. Maybe he was guilty, too.

“Alex,” Simon called for him gently and touched his arm.

He knew what he needed. He had to let go of his pride, though.

“Can you just hold me?” he mumbled, without looking at Simon.

The guy said nothing for two shocked seconds and then took him by the arm and began walking him down the hallway.

Alex remained silent, too, as Simon pushed him through the door to his own office, and locked the door. He only looked up at his lover when the guy stepped away from the door.

And practically jumped him, grabbing him by the shoulders and kissing him hard on the lips. That was surprising, to say the least. Not that Simon wasn’t passionate. But not like this.

“I’m sorry, Master,” Simon murmured and, just as suddenly, stepped away from him.

“Master?” Alex mumbled.

Now, where had that come from?

“I am bad,” Simon seemed to struggle with himself, clenching his hands and looking away. “I must be punished. You’re probably just testing my resolve, right?”

“Huh?” Alex expressed his surprise.

“Forgive me,” Simon knelt in front of him. “I don’t understand this game. I’m no good at it. But I cannot look at you, how you’re all upset and do nothing. Your happiness is the most important thing for me, Master,” Simon hung his head in defeat. “Spank me if that will make you feel better.”

Alex almost rolled his eyes. Fucking Carter Malis! Well, it felt good to focus his anger on someone. And if that someone was Carter, that be it. It wasn’t like he could control everything, the least of all how he felt. Right now, he was pissed - again - at that dork.

“I don’t want to spank you, Simon,” he said as gently as he could.

“I’m not even good enough for that?” Simon asked, his young voice bitter now.

“What the hell are you talking about?” Alex mumbled. “I told you that I just want you to hold me.”

Simon looked at him, a bit disconcerted, still kneeling on the carpet.

“Get up, dummy,” Alex pursed his lips. “And just fuck me,” he added, without a moment of hesitation.

To say that Simon was shocked was an understatement. The guy was looking at him like he was suddenly growing horns out of his head. Suddenly, panic gripped him, and he began feeling his head. What if the guys from that upside down world were messing with him that very moment? But no, that wasn’t it.

“Do you mean it?” Simon asked, almost chocking.

“Yes,” Alex said and crossed his arms over his chest.

This was getting ridiculous. He could not even properly feel like a mess, because Carter had arranged for every guy in his life to be a mess, too.

“Is it an order?” Simon asked again.

Alex groaned.

“Whatever, it’s an order.”

Simon didn’t look like he needed another incentive. In an instant, he was on his feet, and they were kissing again. Alex felt a bit pissed, but as Simon’s deft tongue began caressing him in that familiar, amazing way he liked so much, he let go of his anger.

Instead, he put his arms around Simon and allowed the guy to lift him. Simon was stronger than he looked, but it wasn’t like he weighed much, anyway. Aron could do it with ease, too, although that was no surprise, seeing how strong the man was.

What was he doing, running comparisons like that in his mind? He needed to focus on Simon.

“Do it hard,” he whispered.

There was another, small sign of hesitation from Simon, but this time, there was no need for repeating the demand. Simon put him down, bend him from the waist, guiding him enough to put his hands on the desk, and then dragged his pants down to his ankles, along with the underwear. 

Simon left his side only so that he could bring what was necessary. He groaned as Simon’s fingers probed him, a bit impatiently.

“Hurry,” he whispered.

He could not do that with his husband. Ever again. The realization was like a punch to the gut. It was just the truth. Aron had fucked Carter, and there was no way in hell he could be with Aron as they had been before the accident. That place in Aron’s arms was taken.

Since when was he giving up without a fight? He ground his teeth and almost cursed as Simon pushed inside, determined to obey the order. There was no point in backing down now. After all, a hard fuck from his lover was all he wanted.

Simon’s lips were singing a perverted tune, as the guy pounded into him, hard. He wasn’t usually into this kind of fucking, but right now it was like everything he needed to take his mind off of things.

“Yes,” he moaned and threw his head back while Simon went at it with everything he had. 

The desk was sighing with the usual sound of wood joints under pressure as his lover continued. It was almost a bit too much, how Simon’s cock was filling him, and it was maybe because of lack of sex ... Or maybe that feeling of it being unbearable was coming from another place.

He chose not to think about it. He focused on nothing but the pleasure taking over, as Simon grabbed his hips and fucked him even harder. Letting his head on his arms, he didn’t even bother to touch himself. It wasn’t needed. The way Simon held him, grounding him into his own life, was enough to make him feel the familiar shudder and the warmth that soon followed as Simon filled him up.

Simon held him close minutes after, sneaking his hands under his shirt and brushing gently over his nipples. 

It took him a few moments to realize. He was insanely happy. Or maybe he was losing his mind a little. Perhaps it was normal after everything he had been through.

“Do you think we could go to some BDSM club or something like that?” Simon’s voice pulled him from his musings.

“What?” he mumbled.

“You introduced me to that lifestyle, I mean you hinted at it, but now, I would like us to go.”

The warm feeling was all gone. The headache was coming back. 

“We won’t go anywhere like that,” he said brusquely and almost shrugged Simon off him.

“Why?” Simon asked, like a child.

“Because,” he replied just as petulant.

“Okay,” Simon looked down as he began pulling up his zipper.

With a sigh, he began dressing up, too. He winced at the sensation in his ass. Simon had been quite energetic in their lovemaking. He had a feeling he was going to feel that for a while.

“What’s going on, Alex? Are you in love with Aron or not?” Simon questioned.

Any other time, the immediate reflex would have been to lie. But this time he replied in all honesty.

“No.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah.”

“You’re odd,” Simon shook his head.

“I suppose,” he said with a sigh.

“So what is going to happen now? Am I going to fuck you on per request basis?” Simon asked.

Alex pursed his lips. Simon seemed to have grown a pair, no matter his new obsession with BDSM.

“What are we?” Simon insisted.

Alex turned toward him.

“Exactly what we were before ...”

He caught himself in time. He could not talk to Simon about crazy things like a body swap. One reason being, of course, that he could end up dead if he tried to.

“... the accident,” he eventually completed the phrase.

“Really?” Simon looked like a kid who didn’t know if it was okay to be happy for a promised gift or not. “What changed? Oh, no ... Have you discovered Aron cheated on you, for real?”

Alex felt the need to bite his tongue.

“No.”

Was he incapable of telling lies now? Or at least certain lies. Even if Aron had cheated on him with Carter, it had been unknowingly. And he could not honestly blame Aron for that, no matter how much he wanted to do precisely that.

“I don’t understand you,” Simon sighed.

“Are you rejecting me?” Alex frowned.

“How could I do that?” Simon replied, and his young voice seemed a little bitter.

“Good. Then we’re good,” he said harshly. “I need to get to work. Talk to you later.”

He walked stiffly out of the guy’s office. He needed to find Carter Malis and tell the guy a few things to his face.

***

That indeed hadn’t gone as planned, he thought to himself as soon as he left Carter with his oversweet coffee in that drab fast food joint. Carter had dared to fight back. And told him a few, not so little truths.

Was this ever going to end? He mused as he climbed behind the wheel. Instead of feeling better, he was actually feeling worse. Talking to Carter Malis had solved nothing. And now, he had to keep up the appearances and play nice if Aron wanted the guy a part of his life again.

Aron had been upset over Carter being an idiot, and, by all means, he had to feel rejoiced. The fool was pushing Aron away, probably scared. 

But what was Carter scared of? Seriously, he only needed to reach out, and Aron was going to fall at his feet. How could the guy be so blind? 

The thing was now he needed to get back to his role as a fraud. It wasn’t an easy thing to do. How come he has managed it so well before? What had changed, for real?

He was a fraud. No matter how he looked at things, he was a major fraud.

***

It was something a bit of a wonder how Simon and Aron didn’t seem to see through his charade. He almost wanted to yell at them and tell them everything. But he couldn’t do that now, could he? His life was his, and he had to play the hand he had dealt himself. Plus, Aron was bent on having Carter in their lives, now, and he could not do a thing about it. He had to live with that awful threat over his head all the time now.

Which meant that he had to play the role of a loving husband for Aron, especially since Carter had carved such impossible standards for him. Also, he needed to keep Simon as his lover, but without telling the guy about how he really felt. Simon was bound to blow up if Alex could say to him at least one ounce of the truth.

Maybe Simon was going to ask again for him to divorce Aron. Perhaps he was going to get mad and ask for ...

“I can’t take this anymore!” he yelled.

The place where he had parked the car, above the city, and in an area that was only frequented by teenagers after dark, was deserted at that hour. So he could yell all he wanted.

“Can’t or won’t?” a voice startled him.

He turned to find himself face to face with a guy wearing an immaculate, pristine white suit. His wavy blond hair was neatly combed behind his ears and fell on his shoulders. Alex’s eyes traveled over the man’s lean figure, down to a great looking pair of Cuccinelli loafers. He frowned right away.

“I don’t think those are out just yet,” he said in irritation.

“But they’re fab, right?” the guy threw him a dazzling smile.

Dazzling was too little a word to describe what that smile was. Alex felt a little dizzy. The guy’s face was a white as a statue’s, but he was clearing living and breathing, and his beauty seemed surreal.

“Who the hell are you?” he ground his teeth.

People who looked better than him always pissed him off.

“Ah, can’t you tell?” the man quirked a perfect eyebrow.

Alex rolled his eyes.

“Take care not to stain that,” he said dismissively and began walking toward his car.

“Not so fast, Alex the Jerk,” the man said and, suddenly, he was in front of him, blocking his way.

He almost choked.

“Who do you think you are to talk to me like that?” he protested.

“Ah, forgive me, I haven’t introduced myself,” the man said, placing one hand over his chest, in an exaggerated gesture. “I’m your overseer, darling. Call me Angel.”

Overseer? Alex could feel his blood rushing from head to feet. Fuck! Was he going to die? He turned on his heels to make a run for it. But he was barely a few feet away, that the man was, again, right in front of him.

“Are you teleporting, too?” he barely muttered.

The man laughed, showing rows of pearly teeth.

“I don’t need to, darling. Now tell me. How does it feel having a conscience?”

“I have no idea what you are talking about,” Alex looked away.

“Having trouble sleeping, eating, or enjoying your habits of torturing other people? What about your sex life? How’s your libido? Do you suddenly feel the need to hide under a blanket until Aron stops seeing you completely? What about rushing to Simon and telling him you have never loved anyone as you love him?”

“What the fuck is this? An interrogation?” he clenched his fists and tried to look the guy in the eyes. “And seriously, Angel? All dressed up in white? A little bit too on the nose, don’t you think? You pose as a guardian angel of some sort?”

“Better than Alex the Jerk,” the guy replied promptly.

“That’s not my name, stop it!”

“That’s how I call you,” the guy pinched his cheek.

He jerked his head away.

“Cut it out!”

“Or what? What are you going to do?” the man took one step closer, invading his personal space.

Alex opened his mouth only to realize that he couldn’t threaten the guy with anything.

“I thought so,” Angel said with satisfaction. “Now, let’s talk. I hope to be done with you quickly. Although it was a good opportunity to go shopping a little.”

Alex gaped like a fish.

“Shopping? Do angels go shopping now?”

“Darling,” Angel drawled each word, “I’m not a guardian angel. I’m your overseer. And, frankly, I don’t particularly care about interacting with you when I have other charges that are far more interesting and not jerks like you.”

“Seriously, you should ease on that,” Alex warned.

Angel smiled again.

“I don’t intend to, and I don’t have to. So, jerk ...”

“I have a name,” Alex insisted.

“Okay, I don’t want you to say that I’m a bad overseer,” Angel rolled his eyes. “Now, quickly. You have a choice to make.”

“A choice? I don’t want to die,” Alex said quickly.

“It’s not about that,” the man waved. “Although you are going to die.”

“What?!”

“Not now, don’t worry. Many decades from now, provided that you don’t choke on your own ego, or die of poisoning by accidentally biting your tongue.”

“Come on. I’m not that bad!” Alex shouted.

And bit his tongue by accident. 

“Oh, fuck,” he moaned.

Angel laughed.

“Sorry, Alex, my bad. I could not resist the temptation. What I’m here for is to tell you about the choice. On the one hand, you gained a conscience. Now, seriously, how does that feel?” the man questioned, and this time, he seemed serious.

“Like crap,” Alex sighed.

“But ...” Angel left the phrase pending while gesturing with one hand to encourage Alex to talk further.

“But nothing. Every day is a friggin’ source of pain! Why do I have to suffer?”

Angel chuckled.

“You haven’t suffered too much in your life, have you? Maybe you’ve had too much of everything until now,” Angel said with satisfaction.

“Really? I mean, I have suffered!” Alex exclaimed.

“When?” Angel questioned.

“Well,” Alex pondered.

When had he suffered before? He had been having it easy for as long as he remembered. He had married Aron who was filthy rich, he let Simon bang him, and the guy was beautiful and a considerate lover, he had an awesome car ... Only that none of it felt right now.

“Any ideas? Not even one? A little one? One that you can put on the pillow and tell it goodnight?”

“What the ... are you talking about? So, I don’t have a bad life. Should I say sorry?”

“Hmm, you’re difficult, Alex the Jerk,” Angel seemed to ponder. “Do you see any gain from having a conscience?”

“From feeling bad, you mean? None,” Alex said with aplomb.

“But you don’t want to hurt Aron.”

“I’ve never wanted to hurt Aron!” Alex exclaimed. “I just ...”

“Yes, go on,” his overseer encouraged him.

“I don’t see how what he doesn’t know could hurt him,” he tried to explain.

“Your marriage is a sham, Alex, sorry to break it to you.”

“So? It’s not like it’s the only one!”

“That’s not an argument, and you know it,” Angel replied.

“What do you want me to do?” Alex threw his arms to the sides in defeat.

“Hmm, that’s simple. Divorce Aron, let the guy be happy with Carter, and go be happy with Simon.”

“I wasn’t really expecting an answer,” Alex glared. “And I’m not letting Aron go, what the hell is wrong with you? He’s my husband!”

Angel clucked his tongue in disapproval.

“Maybe. But you’re not his husband. You don’t behave like one. And, seriously, it’s your happiness on the line, too.”

“I really don’t understand what you’re saying,” Alex moaned. “Come on, tell me about that stupid choice already.”

“I’m glad that you’re as impatient as I am to have this over and done with,” Angel replied. “But I’m here to do my job whether you like it or not. So, again, is having a conscience that bad? And, for the record, I know you have suffered in your life. I’m not going to serve you that info on a silver platter only because you want to turn a blind eye to it. What I can and will tell you is that closing your eyes doesn’t make problems go away. Plus, you don’t get to progress if you choose to feel no pain. It’s simple, really.”

“Simple, right,” Alex rolled his eyes. “You’re giving me a headache, seriously. And what’s with the fashion style? Is it supposed to make me feel more endearing toward you? Feel like you are like me or something like that?”

Angel laughed and threw his head back. 

“Sweetheart, I have better fashion sense than a thousand like you. Also, as you can see, I make no effort to have you feel any endearment toward me. Quite the contrary. But you’ve been assigned to me and, as I said, I’m only doing my job.”

“So, do it already,” Alex hissed.

“All right,” Angel said airily. “What do you choose, Alex? Keep your memories of what happened during the body swap, along with your conscience, or remember the accident and forget everything else?”

“You mean, I’ll get to be me again?” Alex almost yelled.

“You? Which you we are talking about? The blind one? The guy who sees men as walking wallets around him?”

Alex huffed. It wasn’t fair. The frigging overseer was even stealing his phrases. Or maybe the guy was in his head anyway, which was a pretty unnerving thought. 

“Whatevs. Yeah, I want to be exactly how I was before the stupid accident.”

“You disappoint me, Alex. I thought this experience was enlightening to you.”

“Yeah, it was enlightening! It proved to me that having to endure through all these frigging myriads of questions about myself every day fucking sucks!” Alex shouted.

“You could be happy, you know?” Angel said, shaking his head. “Pain is never in vain. It has a meaning. It helps you grow.”

“Do you double as a scammy motivational speaker in your spare time?” Alex smiled sweetly, narrowing his eyes.

“You have such a mouth of you,” Angel grinned. “All right, you’re actually making my job easier. I will have no remorse giving you what you think you want.”

“I like my life back the way it was, thank you very much. Also, I’m sure Carter Malis did something to make that accident happen.”

“You’re wrong, Alex, but it’s out of my hands. Finally, I’ll be free of this unpleasant task of taking care of you.”

“Are you really my guardian angel? Because sure as hell you don’t sound like it.”

“Hey, I told you, it’s overseer. That’s what I am.”

“Sure, sure. I know I’m not dead right now because you somehow saved me, right?” Alex looked at the guy through his eyelashes.

Angel half smiled.

“There was a bit of a debate when I got back, that’s true. But it was out of everyone’s hands, nonetheless. Carter’s overseer had seen to the technicalities involved. So, it wasn’t really on me, this saving you’re talking about.”

“So, what now?” Alex looked away. “Do I go home to sleep and wake up in the morning being me again?”

“Let’s make it faster,” Angel moved closer to him. “Here’s your stupid choice,” he said, and suddenly grabbed Alex and kissed him hard on the lips.

Alex almost took one step back and lost his balance. 

***

It was pretty strange how he had no clear recollection of driving up there. But now he needed to go back home. He climbed behind the wheel and kicked the Spyder into gear. One look in the rear view mirror told him he needed his beauty sleep.

Damn, it was nice to be him, he blew a kiss at himself in the mirror. Aron was waiting for him at home. Simon was great in the sack. And now, Carter Malis?

He had such a clear recollection of the accident now. How come he could not remember it before? 

Carter Malis had jumped in front of a frigging truck to save his life. The dork was, after all, not so bad. So Alex needed to show his gratitude. He wasn’t going to tell Aron anything. Most certainly, Carter wanted that thing hidden from his best friend, too, hence that fight Aron had told him he had had with his best friend.

Managing two lovers was going to be damn hard. But, if Carter was willing to be friends to Aron again, that meant they could fool around without his husband noticing anything.

Plus, the guy was a dork, but he deserved that reward. It wasn’t every day someone was willing to get sent into a damn coma for Alex’s sake. 

Alex smiled to himself. Being him was frigging great.

TBC