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For the first few months of the COVID-19 pandemic, my greatest fear was not dying of COVID-19, but being hospitalized and squaring off with gruesome hospital bills. This demonstrates my torturous relationship with capitalism, in which my wallet is more important than my physical well-being. Yikes. But in the recent months of lockdown, my fear has been even less about physically surviving COVID-19, but mentally surviving it. I think I began to crack the most upon learning of Oluwatoyin Salau's murder. I crumpled into a heap on the floor of my office and cried for hours. I still get teary-eyed thinking of her, like as I'm typing this.

Every day the walls in my apartment seem to grow smaller. The news, from what I can stomach, seems to be growing direr and more outrageous. The two days of physical contact I had with another human being this month (the first since FEBRUARY!), along with Butters’ cute ass face, are perhaps the only things that have kept me from shaving my head in a frenzy and possibly even doing something worse. Like all of you, I’m trying to survive and navigate this hellscape, and I’m wondering how much longer I’ve got in me before I do something reckless. I know I’m not the only one. I'll leave it there.

This list would have been a Lexual Says episode, but my video editor (who has their own COVID-related shit going on) is prioritizing two upcoming videos that are forty minutes apiece. I think you’ll find the trade-off worth it when they debut in August! ;) Anyways, here are four things pissing me off.

1. The Obstacles in the Way for Justice For Breonna Taylor

To start off this extremely cynical view of what will happen in the coming months, let the reality sink in that a reinvestigation into Mike Brown’s 2014 murder yielded no charges against Darren Wilson, in Ferguson Missouri. In that case, all it would take to atleast symbolically mend unrest was the arrest of ONE man, who could be scapegoated as a bad apple while not being an indictment of the whole damned dirty system. But no, not even that was possible. In the case of Breonna Taylor, her family has made allegations of her murder being the byproduct of a conspiracy to quicken a real estate development project, implicating higher-ups in the crime, and not just the three officers responsible for unloading their bullets into Taylor. So pair this knowledge with the fact that the first stand-alone black candidate elected to a statewide position, Daniel Cameron, is the person who decides whether or not to prosecute Jonathan Mattingly, Brett Hankison, and Myles Cosgrove for Taylor’s murder. Yes, the Attorney General whose lawn was the sight of nearly 90 arrests of peaceful protesters. Daniel was 33 when elected (and had never tried a case), and he was groomed for his position by senate majority leader Mitch McConnell, and has been supported by Donald Trump. According to Mother Jones, “While stumping for attorney general, Cameron welcomed endorsements from sheriffs, police, and prosecutors, as well as from the state Fraternal Order of Police, whose president boasted that Cameron would “be there for us in the future. Not in the short run, but in the long run.” Because of the Taylor family’s allegations that destroy any possibility for a “bad apples” take, the conservative and [cough cough corrupt] Daniel Cameron is incentivized to not pursue charges against her murders, even with all the unrest. I do not see Breonna Taylor getting justice** , and watching people turn her into a meme on social media has been painful. 

**What is justice? To some people, as discussed in the last episode of Lexual Says, that is police defunding, dismantling, or complete abolition of police and prison. But to others, that means firing the cops and sending them to prison. This discombobulation of our collective agenda leads me to the next thing pissing me off:

2) Protests

Well, not the protests. But the reactions to the protests, as well as the huge disagreements about what everybody wants. In Portland, where protests have been the longest-running, and New York, video footage has shown protesters being apprehended and thrown into unmarked vehicles by men who don’t identify themselves. Armed militias, mainly made up of conservative white men, are hitting the streets to patrol for danger like vigilantes. Other conservative white men who usually cry on the daily about the intrusive federal government treading on them and their right to assemble or defend themselves, are applauding Trump’s plans to strengthen law and order with federal officers shipped into cities under unrest. Though allegedly Trump began pulling out federal agents from Portland yesterday, not only will those agents simply be replaced by local law enforcement, but Trump has announced plans to send more agents to Chicago, Cleveland, Detroit, and Milwaukee, where they will inevitably get violent and manhandle citizens like fascists. A national guard whistleblower has gone on record to say:

“At no time did I feel threatened by the protestors or assess them to be violent,” Adam DeMarco—a major in the Washington, DC, Guard, who was present during the operation to clear Lafayette Square—says in written testimony prepared for a House Natural Resources Committee hearing set for Tuesday. “In addition, considering the principles of proportionality of force and the fundamental strategy of graduated responses specific to civil disturbance operations, it was my observation that the use of force against demonstrators in the clearing operation was an unnecessary escalation of the use of force.”

As for Portland, the ongoing protests are admirable, but also demonstrate a clear chasm between radical leftists and anti-racist liberals of all colors. For example members of the Portland NAACP have voiced concern that the Black Lives Matter movement has been hijacked, including by white anti-capitalists. As I asked in a past episode of Lexual Says, why are people protesting? Are people protesting police brutality or the capitalist system that incentivizes and/or ignores police brutality because police protect class interests? Are we on the same page? The short answer is HELL NO. Many people are still not ready to address this serious ideological divide at the same time as one of the most intense protest movements in the past half-century. We’ve got all this fire that seems to be splitting directions. I watched black people stumble over themselves to defend Nick Cannon’s anti-Semitic conspiracy rant (when Evangelicals and fake Christian billionaires are the true threat to the shallow veneer of democracy that we do have). I've also been watching black people clown, shame, and drag unemployed people for receiving $600/week benefits, and continue to ignore cost of living to attack each other on classist principles. When (if?) the protests wind down, what will the next move be, and what praxis are people willing to offer in their own lives? Will calls to abolish the police and declarations of “Fuck 12” carry over into people’s willingness to look at the system as a whole? Will they advocate for free healthcare and housing, aggressively critique classism in our [increasingly formative] hip hop culture, or stop championing black capitalism as our savior? After all, a wave of COVID-19 related evictions are poised to materialize in the coming months, and poverty is set to increase. If I were to go strictly off of my twitter timeline, yes, the revolution is here. Radical thinkers are hella vocal and numerous on twitter, even if their takes sometimes get drowned out by moderate celebrity activists spewing bare minimum bullshit. But if I go off of facebook, instagram, and the people I’ve been talking to in real life, the answer is an unfortunate no. We still have educating and learning to do, and I’m at least heartened by the number of people I see reading more on classism as well as racism. Speaking of what I’ve been been a sad witness to on social media….

3. People Aren’t Taking Covid-19 Seriously Enough For Me

Imagine your death being linked for an eternity to hubris and a sick desire for white acceptance. That’s Herman Caine’s legacy, the one-time 2012 presidential candidate and Trump supporter who happily tweeted about attending the Tulsa rally without a mask. He just died of COVID-19, and it’s just another casualty of the culture war that has claimed over 150,000 American lives. We lead the world in infections and deaths, and conservative politicians including whole ass governors in Oklahoma and Missouri have publicly denounced or flouted social distancing mandates and guidelines. The piece of shit who I will always remind you stole the Georgia gubernatorial election, Brian Kemp, even moved to sue Atlanta mayor Keshia Lance Bottoms for making mandating the use of masks. Over 150,000 people dead (way past our “low end” projections for death), and we’ve still got die-hard partisan politicians acting like this shit is a game. Even a republican representative named Louie Gohmert in Texas blamed his positive test result on wearing masks. Oh baby do we live in hell. But it’s not just republicans pissing me off. Oh no sir, there are plenty of democrats and apolitical people, hella of them black (and therefore disproportionately at risk to receive poorer or no healthcare) …. attending crowded parties and events. The strip club near my house, which I have not stepped foot in since January 26th, is popping every night of the week. My friend’s stepdad just died of COVID and this is the kind of shit people do. Despite warnings from Dr. Fauci that the only way to curb our infection rate and move past this half-quarantined reality is by social distancing, mask-wearing, and testing, people still think a trip to a hookah bar, or to a Boosie pool party, is worth possible infection and death. Even if you don’t die, recent research has shown that approximately 35% of recovered cover patients still have debilitating symptoms after the recovery period.

By the way, three infectious disease experts including Fauci are testifying infant of the House’s special select committee investigating Trump’s COVID-19 response. So as this continues to drag out, things that only seemed temporarily affected are being dragged down in the whirlpool. Kids have been out of school for months, and its still unclear what’s happening this Fall. 

Kids without internet access will be more at risk of falling behind or attending school physically and being infected. 1/2 of American students ride the school bus, which complicates physical attendance and social distancing for those compelled to attend. Also, private teachers are offering their services and not everybody can afford them. So of course wealthy kids will continue to skip ahead of their poorer peers. Lastly, a study found that kids may carry cover at higher levels than adults, which makes Trump’s insistence that students go back to school even more absurd. COVID is also continuing to wreak havoc on the economy and people’s cost of living. While billionaires are getting richer than they've ever been, roughly 30 million Americans are receiving unemployment benefits. These benefits are about to expire and haven’t been renewed by Congress, who as usual cannot agree on what the fuck to do. Spending, which has already fallen since April, is predicted to continue to fall. 

4. Trump’s Increasing Bullshit

So first of all just yesterday Trump tweeted that we should delay the November election. When you remember this within the context of his numerous “jokes” throughout his presidency about serving more than two terms despite the 22nd amendment, your fascist radar should be going off. Though only Congress can reset the date of an election, Trump is continuing the narrative for his sycophants that if he loses, the election is rigged or was never valid because of the pandemic. Trump has discussed election fraud 91 times this year alone. Though republicans like Mitch McConnell were vocally pissed about Trump’s suggestion to delay the election, it means NOTHING if they don’t address and fix the dismantling of USPS.

Regarding the USPS, I’m worried as a small business owner who already faces astronomical shipping fees, but also I'm concerned because of the contentious and sure-to-be-explosive (no matter what happens) 2020 election. I've already said numerous times that a Trump re-election seems likely (damn my glass-half-empty nature).  More states are turning to mail-in ballots, and since late March when the pandemic really picked up steam, Trump has attacked mail voting almost 70 times. Meanwhile, the USPS itself is being dismantled by a republican donor and UPS investor turned Postmaster by the name of Louis DeJoy. In July 13th he made changes to the Post Office like ending overtime, shutting down sorting machines early, and not moving mail that requires extra trips, causing delays by up to two days in some parts of the country. This is an obvious move to privatize mail, which would be catastrophic for a bunch of people, like small business owners, or rural people who rely on the mail for medical prescriptions. But also mailing delays means that mail-in ballots could go uncounted. Tens of thousands of ballots were disqualified in the primaries this year because they didn’t arrive on time, with over 70,000 being in California. 

The other major thing pissing me off about Trump’s latest antics was his rousing of suburban voters. On July 29th, Trump tweeted: 

I am happy to inform all of the people living their Suburban Lifestyle Dream that you will no longer be bothered or financially hurt by having low income housing built in your neighborhood…

If you have not watched Zip Code, Race, and Class, do that! The privatization of housing, and the lack of affordable housing, are major issues that have long impacted the black community and will continue to do so even when Trump finally takes a hint and fucking dies. Back in 2018, Trump gutted an Obama era rule that required jurisdictions receiving federal housing funds to identify and assess patterns of discrimination in housing and create plans to deal with it if they want to continue to get funding. The rule strengthened the 1968 Fair Housing Act and encouraged communities to build apartments, not destroy the “Suburban Lifestyle Dream.” The latest development came six days before Trump’s tweet, in which the Trump administration began implementing its plans to give more power to local communities, calling Obama’s rule a “federal overreach.” Taking all we know about racist state and local governments being given free rein over racially sensitive issues (Slavery was about states rights! Says Mountain Dew Brad), it's obvious why this is troubling. Additionally, Trump’s tweet is a clear dog white to white people who live in the suburbs and want to keep them white. Suburban voters made up around half of the electorate in 2016. 

Other News:

  • People in 27 states received unsolicited packages from China carrying seeds, and agriculture officials are warning people not to plant them because they could be dangerous
  • Local officials in 19 states have passed or are considering passing resolutions that would designate racism as a public health crisis, potentially leading to more recognition and funding for medical inequity among minorities. This includes Louisville, Kentucky, which may be a concessional move for officials still dealing with unrest over Breonna Taylor. Black residents are 23% of Lousiville's population but 27% of COVID-19 related deaths.
  • A Democrat state senator in Tennessee, Katrina Robinson, allegedly embezzled approximately $600,000 meant to fund a nurse training school. Allegedly she spent the money on personal debt, a family trip to Jamaica, a car for her daughter, and more. An official investigation is underway.
  • The Hong Kong government is delaying it's own September election by a year, citing COVID-19 as the cause, angering pro-Democratic faction who see it as pro-Beijing bullshit. (Us Americans can relate, huh?)
  • In a theatric event reminiscent of Microsoft standing trial on anti-trust charges in the 90s, a 15-member bipartisan anti-trust panel grilled the CEOs of Google, Amazon, Facebook, and Apple on July 29th. Democrats focused on the tech industry's habit of buying up and trampling over startups, and conservatives focused on the alleged anti-conservative bias on these platforms. Because these tech companies have not jacked up prices on services and goods (and are even often free), anti-trust laws targeting them can't really be applied. Democrats of the panel are more inclined to want to change anti-trust laws for the digital age, while Republicans are more inclined to not see it as necessary.
  • Due in part to COVID-19, domestic violence rates are on the rise across the world. Most recently, a black woman was murdered by her ex-boyfriend while she lay in bed with her 4-year old daughter. Five children in the home survived. R.I.P. Kimberly Robinson.

I hope we all get a bit of joy in August. 

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Anonymous

"When (if?) the protests wind down, what will the next move be, and what praxis are people willing to offer in their own lives?" Yup, that's the biggest issue I'm having. I try to post educational and informational stuff on all my SM platforms, in the hope that at least one person will read/watch these things and begin to ask themselves the hard questions. I've been having these conversations with family and friends for a long time. I've grown accustomed to staying home whenever possible and wearing a mask when I choose to go outside. I don't see the changing. Flu season is coming and with it the colder weather. I just feel it best to cover my nose/mouth as much as possible.

Anonymous

I hope that you are doing okay. Thank you for continuing to put out great content despite how tough everything is right now. Take care of yourself