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Some people ask me why I don't post my commissions anymore. As you support me, I feel I owe you honesty. A lot of commissions and rewards work, I really don't think I do a good job. To be extremely honest, most of the things I'm told to do are subjects I don't like, or jobs that are too difficult for me, too big muscles, too big futa, too big pregnant bellies. I really feel that these works don't extract the best I can and that directly influences the quality.


Understand that I'm not saying "stop asking me that kind of request". that's not it. However, yes, as time goes by, it saturates me mentally, mainly because of the volume. Again, I am NOT asking you to stop.


I don't post these works, because I don't really feel comfortable with them. I try to create something new myself in the spaces between commissions, so my mind doesn't freak out, like drawing Ella, the maid, or stuff about my game. Precisely because I need to feel that art is still something I enjoy doing, not just a duty.


Perhaps this is just an account of a tired artist. For many times these months, I've been seriously thinking about stopping commissions permanently, and just sticking with patreon, so I would only do this type of content once a month. But I'm still not sure. Maybe I should be more selective with the works, as many artists do. I do not know.


What I do know is that I really need to regain my pleasure in drawing. I know many here are tired of hearing this. "Here he comes again with this talk". But there are situations that I really don't know how to solve.


I'll repeat it one more time, just to be clear. this isn't an attack on commissioners or anything, and I'm not even asking you to stop. I'm just writing this because you guys support me, and I feel like I have to speak honestly.


Praise teh sun

Comments

Gran D4rkf4ng

I understand what you're saying, and I appreciate your honesty. However, I would love to see your commissions. You may not feel comfortable with them, as they are not up to your calibur, but the rest of us would like to see them and judge it for ourselves. We are your audience, after all, as are your commissioners, so our feedback should be as important.

CountlessClouds

Agreed. We can be our own worst critics and often see what we do as very flawed even when the recipient of our works is absolutely thrilled. I'd say post what you feel comfortable with but don't feel like you need to limit yourself with things like "Nobody will like this" or "The client said they liked it but I'm not thrilled with the quality."

Sheldog

It's ok to make your preferences known. I do try and vary up my comms/requests between subjects because I know what you like. You mentioning wanting to draw more horror made me want to think of something along those lines to commsion some day. I know artists that put themes along with patron requests. You could come up with a theme for the month, and optionally have people abide by it. I've really been enjoying seeing more of your OCs lately and I hope you find more time to draw them. If I can confess I'd much rather see your OCs than any of the anime/comic waifus for a weekly vote. Maybe take some time and tells us more about them when you're feeling up to it :)

98Sparkz

I appreciate the honesty and understand having your own preference with things. I've never gotten to commission you yet but I do hope too in the future aside from patreon since I think you are an amazing artist with a ton of talent to showcase for us. :) So never feel too afraid to be honest with us. And I also wouldn't mind seeing more horror works and other chars of yours since I'm a huge fan of silent hill myself. :D

Lardivag

Sad to hear you feel that way, appreciate the honesty of the situation you're going through! I for one love your own personal works like the maid and patreon stuff, and love your extra big stuff too! I think you do an amazing job at both but can understand if it puts a heavy toll on you having to draw the same thing over and over! For the best of you I really hope you regain the spark you need as losing your art would be a blow to everyone and mostly for yourself I feel!