BB's Dirty Thoughts, Mar 27th (Patreon)

As a heads up to the new folks: as of about a month ago, we've switched to bi-monthly longform post (with the occasional extra bonus, as the horniness strikes!) instead of trying to cram a weekly into my schedule. Tiers shall be edited to reflect this.

Now! It's topical... let's talk about slapping! (Just not the slap at the Oscars, because I don't know about you folks, but I'm ready to see Something Else in my feeds.) Obviously, Content Notice: consensual kink + slapping.

Back in college, I had a this tall, hunky Spanish/Chinese boyfriend- charisimatic, muscular, nerdy, a bone fide himbo. (Now of course, he only played up the stupid part... he very much knew what he was doing when he enlisted as a Marine... despite completing college and testing into officer school... and got left by me for cheating when on base. Yeaaaah; a prize idiot for certain, but one who knew Exactly what kind of shitty bullshit he was pulling. Not a great dude in the end, but I digress- at the time, he was the quintessential Quarter Back College Boyfriend... which means you Definitely leave his ass and move on, but it makes for good stories.)

He had a libido that actually managed to keep up with mine; rarely do I find a man with datable qualities that actually manages to, believe it or not. *Wry smile* But one of the things we liked to was indulge in some tough talk from me, and a general sense of topping from the bottom. Once, he asked for me to hit him right across the face if he wasn't fucking me as hard as I liked, and gave carte blanche to do so in future (it still behooved to check if the mood was right/check in, and thankfully, enthusiastic consent can be communicated in a myriad of ways and no one ever got hurt)- it was like setting a FIRECRACKER under an already roaring fire. Sparks flew, temperatures soared, sheets got Absolutely Destroyed. (Quite literally, and more than once-!)

It was the POWER; something I'm sure my followers have heard me talk about in the context of kink before-! The thrill and rush of throwing my metaphorical weight around, of DEMANDING sexual satisfaction from my Deeply willing partner, of satisfying a basal need for ferality and indulgent, hedonistic sexual violence. It's the "you will do what I TELL you to do", and the hot, gorgeous hunk of man flesh saying "YES M'AM" before he fucks you within an inch of your LIFE.

Now, my career with kink had already been pushed into full swing by that point, but it would be a good while before I expanded my boundaries as far as they could go. I STILL, to this day, REVEL in finding new areas to push the limitations of, because so little for me remains unexplored. This is a good thing; it means I have a Fantastic idea of what I do and do not like, and what has wiggle and growth room. It Hardly makes me bored in the sack, nor BorING, nor desensitized (does eating ice cream make you stop wanting it, or desensitized to it's tastiness? It most CERTAINLY does not, and the same is true for sexuality) but it Does mean that new ground is exceptionally thrilling, as it doesn't come around as often. Humans are creatures of pleasure, innovation and debauchery, and looking for strange and delicious fruit can only be expected.

There's something visceral about superficial, consensual violence... even in the most casual of forms, the idle swat of the tush during missionary heterosexual sex... we can certainly carry that one out as far as very involved roleplay, but at it's core, we're dealing with half nerve stimulation and physical response, and half psychological response. It's why it's often viewed as a gateway to more serious, riskier forms of impact and sting- you take away the pleasure, leave the sexual psychology, and boom, you have a lot of explanation for  how Maaaaaaaaaany kinks work, especially the ones that seem harder to understand the interest in, apart from novelty.

I've been blessed with a great many partners along the years who have enjoyed a range of kinky things, within consenting, kink-safe spaces or behind closed doors... from the lady I dated who LOVED to be terrorized by having pretty attachments to her nipple piercings, to the Spanish lover who is only spurred on by sexual fury and passion, refusing to take "no" for an answer (within the confines of a safeword that WILL be respected, mind... "no" is a bad safeword! XD) to the romance of nursing a split lip...

I knew a woman who once described German opera as "grabbing the sexy tenor off the street, beating him senseless, throwing him into a ruffled shirt, slapping some liner on his face and tossing him onto a stage" and while her characterizations for Italian and French opera were boringly stereotypical, that one stood out for me... it makes you want to kiss that split lip, nurse the bruised lover... or maybe bruise him up some more, in service of more sensual desires.

There is effective use of the slap in keeping the attention of a delirious submissive, who can hardly focus on the overwhelming pleasures and sensations being wrought upon her. This is FAR and away a different move than the thwack one commonly sees in vanilla, heterosexual porn, where it often has more to do with degradation. (Nothing wrong with this inherently, but people who learn sexuality from watching mainstream porn are often internalizating a casual degradation of women, thinking this is "something that all women like" and slapping their partners without consent... which, of course, is sexual assault. There is no difference, on the receiving end, between a mistake, a "mistake" and an outright gesture of malicious violence- all result in a personal violation that damages it's target. Please, PLEASE check with your partners before ever engaging in a taboo or violent past-time. Consent isn't just sexy, it's Mandatory.) But there's so much MORE than just casual, boring subjectification... there's a power dynamic established, there's command, control, the sheer madness and pleasure of knowing that the person you're striking is Enjoying the power you assert over them, demanding their attention and obedience.

"Come here." "Pay attention!" "Don't come yet!" "Fuck me harder." "Not good enough!" "Bad boy!" "GOOD girl". "You're so Pretty when you're cum-drunk."

The reality of my sexuality would see me as a Very DEAD CENTER point between submissive and dominant, not just in tastes, but in action and common behaviours. I would call myself the Switchiest of switches... but the practice, I end up leaning a switch-top, by nature of dominant areas being more natural to me, being safer areas for me to navigate, and sheer convenience. The Sweetness of this, is that my tastes for gentle, firm, and even sadistic dominance rarely go unsatisfied. I LOVE being called Mistress, Goddess, Sir, Madam, M'am, my Lady, and many other things. It thrills me to entertain the Gift that is heart, flesh, soul and mind, so see it eager and excited to serve and be pushed past the banal lover, the all-too-common place single orgasm, if that. With women, I love to use tools, to massage, to edge, to leave bruises in sensual, nervy places that show for the world they have been THOUROUGHLY loved. With men, I prefer my hands... or crueler, sting-based toys, where they can take it.

But the sweet, succulently pink impression of where I have been permitted to travel, the wetness of fluids and the oil paint of lover's marks, purple, green, black... the shy-yet-proud parade the submissive makes of their marks post glory, watching their happy blush...

Rewarding. Bliss.

But the slap... a simple tool in Mistresses toolbox, but a powerful weapon all the same. Dangerous and inhumane in the wrong hands, Deliriously hedonistic in the hands of someone who wields it responsibly.