Little Update (Patreon)

By now you guys probably hate this posts. But I wanted to thank all your kind words. They really are helping me. I wish I could see what you guys see on me but right now I feel lost.

Is the first time I can't just hug and kiss Josh's problems away.

When he was little, he use to have big tantrums like this where he would bite me, but all I did was hug him and sing to him while holding him tight and that was enough.

Now, Josh is taller and stronger than me and that is just impossible to do.

I've been crying for the past 2 days since the incident because nothing it's getting better.

Tomorrow we have an appointment with the team of psichologist at his school with me, Josh and his dad. Hopefully things are more clear then.

Looking for a new doctor is complicated when there are not many options around. Tomorrow the school will recommend one so we'll see how that goes.

Right now, I don't feel like recording a video bc I will just cry and reacting feels wrong right now when Josh is always screaming and crying as well.

I will be honest with you, I feel like crap right now, I can't sit in front of a camera and pretend to be ok. For me in order to give you guys a good reaction I have to be happy and excited and right now I feel like I have no energy left.

I apologise for failing you guys. I don't even want to watch AHS or HTGAWM which both premiere new episodes this week. I'm not excited for the episodes I feel like a complete failure, I'm really sorry, you guys support here is what is allowing me to look into other more expensive options for Josh's treatment, so thank you for been so patient with me.

I love you guys. I will be back with my reactions soon. Everything I promise I will post I will do it, it's just going to take a little extra time.

Thank you!