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I'm really sorry guys, please check the video for an update.

Love you guys!

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Comments

Andre Ransom

Your health is important Juli 😭 you should see a doctor about your sleeping problems, I had the same problems some time ago.

Edwin Wickey

Don't worry about it Juli! You have to take care of yourself! Take your time and I'll be here excited for your next reactions when they come!

thisismaria27

Juli, I am so sorry that you’re going through this. but you are so brave for being real and honest about it. I had a similar problem once and two things helped me a lot: talking about it and meditating. I know it sounds like some “eat pray love” shit, but it worked. maybe it’ll work for you too. if you need someone to talk to, you can always dm me :)

Aaron Thorpe

Juli, Thank you for sharing. That can't have been easy. It does NOT sound ridiculous. The most important thing has to be that you take care of yourself. Whatever that may mean for you. My father suffers from Sleep Apnoea and a few other sleep disorders. I also have often struggled with getting to sleep. It can have a huge impact on all aspects of your life, including your mood, and it can make everything harder when you don't get good sleep. It is good to hear that you have got some good sleep yesterday and that you're going to take a pill tonight. I hope you feel good in the morning. You put a huge amount of pressure on yourself to get everything done, which is understandable; you have paying customers and you're a one-woman-show! But burn out is a real thing, and you can only do what you can do. My mind keeps going to the phrase "Que será, será. Whatever will be, will be" Maybe on some of your quiet days you can do some extra reactions and keep them up your sleeve so that some days you can just post and not need to react? It's like you said. Your schedule is very busy. You react 6 or 7 days most weeks. That is very difficult of not impossible to sustain. Schedule some breaks for yourself! It's probably really good that you are planning on going to talk to someone, but that's something for you to decide upon... Anyways, this reply is too long, but I hope that you 'feel better' (a silly thing to say, but you know what I mean..). Be good to yourself. You deserve it. We love you, Juli :D

Chase Narron

We are all here to support you Juli! :) Take time for yourself and your health if you need to. I’m so sorry that you’ve been having a rough time. I have lots of sleeping problems too. I hope you are able to find a good therapist in Lima. Being able to freely talk about something without judgment can be extremely liberating and it might just be what you need.

Sara Peterson

I promise it doesn't sound ridiculous. I'm 29 and have struggled with depression since I was about 9. It wasn't until I was like 25 that I said I've had enough and reached out to a therapist. It's easy to go on medications, but reaching out to a therapist always seemed daunting. I still go every 2 weeks and it's the absolute best thing I could have done for myself. It's hard work and it can take time to see big changes but it's so worth it. I'm not sure what pill you're taking to sleep but I've had sleep issues on and off and taking melatonin has helped some. Take care of yourself :)

Jenny

I'm so sorry for your troubles. When I was little I thought it was normal that it took me a couple of hours to fall asleep. It was like you said, my brain just wouldn't shut up.. I've suffered from depression for many years and isolating is definitely a symptom.. I'm no doctor but I encourage you to get help. It's sad that mental health has a stigma of shame and embarrassment. It;s a disease just like any other. It's so hard to motivate yourself when you are depressed. IT IS NOT LAZINESS!! Sometimes the hardest thing I do every day is to get out of bed. There's no shame in getting help and I'm glad you feel you can share your struggles with us.

PhillyJ

I suffer from a lot of these issues as well, Marijuana has saved my life, I think Peru is taking steps or has already taken steps to legalize marijuana for medical purposes. I would look into the laws there and see if that is an option and if so you can see if it works for you. There are strains that treat OCD, fatigue, depression and anxiety. You're incredibly strong fro having the courage to speak out to us. I hope you find some way to help you feel better, We love you!

Alvin Cura

I am very moved by what you've shared. I haven't figured out how to put into words what I wish to share with you beyond just reactions and first impressions, but for now please accept my love and support.

dennis

How disrespectful of her to put you down like that. You are in no way lazy Juli, the amount of effort you put in to give out reactions is INSANE and all of us can easily understand that. She just assumes that because your job is mainly at home that it’s easy but in reality it is so difficult. We support you and we are here for you, I hope you get the help you need! It is great that you realized this is a problem and you are one step ahead to fix it. You should please try and stick to your schedule of sleeping at 10 PM because that is the best for you :)

JuliDG

Thank you Edwin. You are always so supportive, thank you so much!

JuliDG

Thank you Maria, I do really need to talk to someone because I'm not doing well, I feel like crap pretty much all day. I try to forget about it but it's getting impossible to do it lately.

JuliDG

Hi Aaron, Thank you for sharing with me your dad's struggle, knowing that more ppl suffer from this makes me feel less alone and a little less crappy for needing to sleep when I should be doing some other things. Yeah, that is one of the roots of my problems, I always believe I'm letting you guys down, even when I'm right on schedule, I feel like I can do more even if that means less sleep for me, which is not good but I can't help myself to think that I'm a complete failure. I do need to schedule some breaks, I see the opportunity to do it sometimes and I just think I will be ok with putting more content and that leaves me with no desire to do anything and with my brain going off like crazy. I've never been good at takingcare of myself, many years of been told I was burden to the people who were suppose to love me can do that to you, I guess. Thank you for always been there for me, for worrying when no one else does. Thank you!

JuliDG

I'm looking for a therapist in Lima, it's hard to find one tho. Thank you for your support!

JuliDG

Yeah, I have always been like this but I just feel like I can't take it anymore, like I need to really talk to someone without been judged, so hopefully I find a therapist soon.

JuliDG

You are so right, sometimes it's only Josh who keeps me going, it's so hard to be so tired all day but having to smile and be ok just so my son doesn't think something is wrong, I've been able to do this for a long time but I'm on apoint where I feel I can't keep faking it. I need help and having you guys here telling me I'm not crazy for feeling like this is helping me so much bc Ik at least admiting there's a problem it's good enough for now. Thank you !

JuliDG

I was so scared to do it and I almost didn't post it bc I thought no one will care or you'll think I am making excuses to not do what I'm suppose to do, trust me I feel like a failure for not doing more but reading your guys' comments, is helping me so much. Thank you. They recently passed a bill for medical marihuana use, but they haven't made the rules yet and we are waiting on that, hopefully I can access to it soon. Thank you!

JuliDG

Yes Nico, it was so hurtful to hear her say that, she is a very important person to me and has always been so supportive and I have been supportive of her as well but listening to her saying that broke my heart. Thank you for your kind words, I will stick to that schedule from now on, I promise!

dennis

I know it’s hard but try not to let it get to you, she just didn’t know and assumed it without thinking. I’m so glad you’re sticking to the schedule, feel better soon!:)

Florence

Hi Juli, thank you very much for sharing with us. I know it wasn't easy. I don't really have anything else to say that others haven't already said so I just wanna let you know that I support you in whatever you want to do and I appreciate you very much. I'm also very happy for Josh that he has found a school where he can thrive. Lots of love xx

Thadman

I finally went to a therapist after I've suspected I've been depressed for about 20 years. To be fair, I didn't think I was for 20 years, it's just when I realized that I seem to be depressed, I tried to think back to around when it started and that's how I came to that. Anyway, I went to a therapist that my friend's daughter really liked and the week after I went the first time, I was let go from my job and had no more insurance. That's life in the U.S. I only went the one time but I liked him. I get the trepidation you may feel, I'm not at all a social person and really have only about 3 friends, two of which live far away and I hardly see. The 3rd I see once every couple of months 'cause she's busy and travels. But, I do wish I was still able to go to the therapist. Try to drill down and sort out my issues and find ways to fix them. 20 years of getting more isolated and depressed has shown me I can't really figure it out on my own.

Anonymous

Sorry I'm just getting this, cause I just work 48 hours straight. Juli you always come first love, we love your reactions but without you being healthy and sound minded we can't have them. So always take care of you and your family first. We will still be here waiting for you when you can do the rections. Take care of your self, figure out what's wrong and please try to fix it. And if you have to make time to socialize with friends and loves ones I understand because that's important too. Love you and what you are doing for son's well being and your reactions. Please take care