The Mariopocalypse (Patreon)

So an old idea I've had was a dark but mocking apocalyptic Super Mario setting. It started as an RPG idea, then a sexy but badass Peach-centric story, and put it together into an actual story today in a few hours. Basically, every Mario boss struck at once, clashing with each other and rendering the kingdom a wasteland and wiping out Mario mostly by coincidence in the process. The heroes and villains alike start to go quiet, staking out small areas just to protect themselves and stay alive. See if you can catch what must be a few dozen references in there. A lot of the fun was writing canon and story into the setting, since the creators are for some reason STRONGLY against any story, canon or logic behind Mario games to a point of actively removing it.

It might make it onto the next vote, and I might just go asking y'all what direction to take the story based on the ending here. Also, despite being an actiony romp, yes I promise there is sex at the end.

found the pic with some basic Googling at http://corankizerstone.deviantart.com/art/PRIVATE-PEACHES-337283972  

Under the hot, angry sun, Mario is missing. The guardian of the Mushroom Kingdom had stopped one threat after another, keeping countless evils at bay. What he never could have expected was all of them at once. By unimaginable coincidence, numerous threats had come to bear on the land all at once. Bowser had obtained the Star Rod while Smithy plunged from the sky. Wart manifested himself from the dream world through dark magic while King Boo rallied his army of the undead. With danger in every direction, the hero finally fell, and the kingdom with it.

In what seemed like some mystical act of spite, the conquering forces butted heads over the territory. The tyrants drove themselves into disarray, soon reduced to mere shells of the forces they once wielded. Now just a few proper cities remained; kingdoms made too big a target, and more people lived by scavenging or service to one of the various lords in power. It was the way you lived now. In the Mushroom Wasteland, you took your chances alone or you risked being backstabbed and left in the lifelessly staring sand dunes.

A solitary woman, one of the few humans left in the world, parked her repurposed go-kart on one of said dunes to check on her map. She eyed the Choco Mountains and compared it to the direction of the scowling sun. She checked the clouds to make sure there were no Lakitus steering them, ready to bombard anyone they could find with loot worth stealing. Pink had been at this for a long time now. She knew what she had to do to survive. She lazily noted the airship off in the distance, bearing the dreaded flag of a Bowser skull to show it was under the command of Bowser himself, or at least one of his toadies or twisted bastard children. She barely bothered to sigh at the sight at this point. Things had changed. She had changed. At least the scaly bastard was willing to stay up in his boat, taking tribute through his goons.

That was when a new player entered the equation. A vertical beam of light caught her eye, making Pink lift her goggles to replaced them with her binoculars instead. She wondered if it was some kind of magikoopa attack or some of the shyguy cultists doing their odd rituals, but instead, there was an explosion. The beam stopped as it kicked out a burst of sand, Pink quick to replace her goggles and duck behind her kart for some quick shelter. She pulled down her helmet and tugged her jacket tight around her racing bodysuit, making her dirty blonde ponytail stick out behind her. When the shockwave stopped, she peered out carefully. There was a crater where she saw the beam touch down, but no signs of debris. It wasn't an easy scavenge, but there had to be something there. Unearthed minerals or maybe a dead dino rhino. She could use some actual meat for once.

She looked to make sure there wasn't anyone else going in that direction before she jumped back into her kart (the faded pink vehicle with the off road tires and the bent spoiler) and drove off to investigate.

Probably the last thing she expected to find inside was a young human. Not only was he in tact, but he was alive! And clean! He had a t-shirt and jeans on, with short dark hair and sneakers. Not unheard of in the Mushroom Waste, but never in that good quality unless you worked directly under one hell of a wealthy Boss.

"Hey!" she shouted down at him, raising her dirty goggles while keeping a hand on her hip where her overly-sharpened boomerang was holstered. "You breathin' down there!?"

The boy stood up unsteadily, brushing sand from his hair and clothes. "Ugh... what was that...?"

"I said are you breathin'? Do you need a 1-Up or somethin'? I got barter!"

"What? No," the kid replied. "I just read some grimdark as shit opening cut scene and... why am I in sand?"

"Shellshocked. Fuckin' perfect," Pink muttered to herself. She fixed her goggles back into place and climbed out to the back of her kart. The crater was steep and a good twenty feet down at least. She wasn't risking getting her main ride stuck in there. She pulled out the tow cable and threw it down. "Grab onto that! Let's get you outta there."

The boy did as she asked, grabbing the hook at the end and scaling up as she reeled it in with with the crank. "There you go. Need water?" she checked. As a scavenger, she was always open for a trade.

"What? Nah, I'm good," the boy replied. "I had some pizza before and so much soda I had to take a leak."

Pink stared at him through her goggles, finally lifting them back up over her helmet. She had a pretty face, once, now tainted with a lot of sand, ash, and a fading bruise under one of her bright blue eyes. "Rich kid. Where were they hidin' you? Monstro Town? River City? Wendy's Wonderland?"

"No... Jersey."

Pink shrugged. "Never heard of it. No wonder it doesn't suck." She looked him over and sighed. "We're gonna draw more bottom feeders if we stay here, and there's nothing left but sand. Let's get out of here."

"Okay, but..." The boy gestured vaguely, looking for the words. "Am I like... in VR or something? Am I winning?"

"You talk a lot of funny words, kid. Keep it up. People might light you too much to pull a fire flower on you."

She climbed into the kart and fired it up, nodding at the one large chair. "No backseat, but you can fit between me and the engine. Just don't sit on anything pricey." The boy climbed in awkwardly, stepping around the few small backpacks and fitting in. "So seatbelts, so just hold onto me."

"Onto... you?"

"I know what I'm doing. You CLEARLY don't. Just catch anything if it's about to fall out." The boy leaned forward and held onto her as she said.

"What do I know you from?" the kid asked.

"I get around. I go where I need to these days. Kinda stand out." She adjusted the rearview mirror to smirk at him. "Call me Pink. And you want a tip."

"Sure?"

Pink smacked one of his hands, making him pull it back. "Watch the hands there, Player." She grabbed his wrists, removing them from her breasts and pulling them around her waist instead. It still made the kid blush as he held on for the ride, his first time seeing the Mushroom Wasteland.

They drove on in simple silence for a while, the kid seeming overwhelmed by the sight. Clearly, Player here was sheltered. "So what's your name?"

"Andrew," the boy replied, calling back over the engine and through her helmet.

"That your real name?" she pried.

"Yea."

"Here's another pro tip then, Player: don't use it. Makes it easier for bad guys to kidnap you."

"What bad guys? Like goombas?"

"And worse. Trust me, Player. If you're an Andy, go by anything else." The word was that a Boo could possess you if they had your name, or that the Shy Guys could deliver it to Wart to let him steal your thoughts through your dreams. Even if they learned it, having the backup was enough to dilude the affects and people to find your family to ransom you. Even if they were just rumors, they worked like a superstition.

"Uh, sure," Andy agreed. He looked over the land of browns and blacks and grays, seeing the staring eyes on the occasional hillside or shrub that were creeping him out. "Can I ask you a question?"

"Might as well. It's a little ways 'til we get to my place."

"Are you really... Princess Peach?"

The kart screeched as Pink stomped on the brakes. She turned around and lifted her goggles, staring at him furiously. "Who the FUCK told you that name!?" she barked, her hand going to the boomerang sticking out of her holster. When he didn't answer right away, she drew the blue and white weapon to show that the other end had been sharpened and whittled down to its cold steel interior, capable of doubling as a machete. "Who sent you!?"

"Nobody!"

"Was it the koopas? The Sumo Brothers? General Guy and the 8 Bits? Wario? I swear to fuck, if he wants my bounty, I'll have his balls!"

"No! I swear! I played the games! I watched the cartoons when I was little! I just... know you! Nobody told me!"

"Games?" Peach narrowed her eyes and watched him coldly for a moment, keeping her weapon ready. "What do you know...?" she asked through grit teeth.

"I know that you... uh... the princess, at least, ruled the Mushroom Kingdom. She was always flirty with Mario, and nobody really knew your story. You just... were in charge. You had a bunch of Toads you lead, and a butler guy... one with a moustache... Bowser was always kidnapping you, but Mario kept kicking his butt and saving you. This one time he threw him into some land mines and you made him a giant..."

"...strawberry cake." They said the last part together, though Pink in a hushed whisper. Her expression softened, and she wiped her arm across her eyes. It would have hid the tears if she didn't leave wet streaks of dirt across her face from it. "Sorry. I haven't thought of those days in a long time. What's the last thing you remember about me? ...us?"

"Uh... they had some new game coming for the Switch (that's the new game console, the thing you played these on). I waited in line to buy it, even though everyone said it was a grimdark reboot thing. I watched a cutscene with a Mario Is Missing joke, then... a flash, and I'm here."

Peach sighed wearily, shaking her head. "Look... I don't use that name anymore. Everyone remembers me. Everyone expects things from me when I use that name. So..." she looked around at the empty desert. "It's fine. But... Pink when we're in public, alright?"

He nodded, and only then did she put away her bladed boomerang. "Okay... got it. We're Pink and Player, not Peach and Andrew."

Peach nodded and turned back, shifting a few levers around in her kart. "Sorry, baby," she muttered to it as she got the engine going properly again.

Andrew leaned over the kart's seat curiously, watching her work. "So... what happened? I thought the Mushroom Kingdom was like... green and happy."

"A lot of things. Mario fought them off for a while, but then everything came all at once. He wasn't just fighting monsters and villains, he was fighting against a force of nature. All those sources of magic at work went off on each other and caused a chain reaction."

"Like a magical nuke," Andy observed, looking around the place.

"A what?"

"Like... a gigantic Bullet Bill hit the world?" he offered.

"Kind of. Just if that Bill came from five different directions at once and dried up all the resources. Now water's more valuable than coins." The engine of her kart came out smoother as she eased off the brakes. "There. Think we've got..."

There came another huge thud and a burst of sand, but this time closer and its cause was more obvious. It cleared quickly, showing a huge, spiked shell embedded in the sand. It had a dull green shade with a white outline, hollow on the inside when you looked through its gaping arm hole. It was big enough to live inside, even if it was torn apart around one end. "What... the...?" Andy muttered, wiping the sand from his face and squinting at the colossal hunk of scales and spikes.

"Take the wheel!" Peach jumped out of the cart and patted the steering wheel. Andy hurried to lean forward, grabbing it for her as she ran out behind the kart.

"What? Why?"

"Just hold it. Hit the gas to keep it going every once in awhile."

"Which one's the...?"

"Big one. On the right."

Andy gave it a testing tap of his foot, the engine growling lightly in response as if he wasn't welcome in Pink's place. The blonde pulled the tow cable look from the back and lashed it around one of the spikes on the shell. It was huge enough that she could have impaled herself on it if she wasn't careful, and her body probably still wouldn't hit the ground.

"This is koopa shell!" She returned to the kart with excitement clear in her voice. "We get a handful of this and we're loaded. A whole shell and we'd be like Bosses."

"Bosses? Like, Birdo and Fry Guy?"

"Bosses' are the ones who own the big settlements. The Koopa Kings, Wario, Wart... they can buy and sell lives instead of food. We could really make a difference with this!"

Andy stepped back to let her get back in the kart, revving the engine to get it loose from the sand and starting to speed up, the cable drawing taut and pulling on the shell. The whole thing budged an inch or two before a large, crusty scale started to pull loose.

"Why is it so important?" Andy asked, looking back at the creaking shell.

"This stuff's worth its weight in gold! One of the hardest materials in the world. Almost unbreakable. And the Koopas own a monopoly on the stuff," Peach explained.

"So... why is it here?" Andy asked, looking upward.

"The plan is to be gone before we find out," Peach pointed out, flooring the gas briefly for another sharp pull. She paused long enough to follow Andy's gaze, seeing one of the huge wooden airships coming down towards them. It resembled a simple wooden pirate ship, but with hundreds of propellers sticking out of its bottom. It looked like it had seen better days, with weathered sails and various burns and patched up holes in its hull. One was actually freshly smoking, and looking closely, Andy could see several Hammer Brothers hard at work filling up the large hole it caused.

"Shit!" Peach hissed, stomping the gas until it hit the floor. The tires screeched, kicking up smoke and sand for a few seconds before finally lunging forward. Andy saw the chunk of shell finally tear itself free, the kart screeching through the wastes with a ten-foot long scale in tow.

A strong wind came off of the propellers of the airship, and Peach didn't slow down for a second. Andy had to hold onto her tighter as she bounced over some hills and dunes, gripping the bouncier of her loot bags when it flew a bit too high from one of her jumps. "This is bad," Andy noted, seeing a few huge cannons rotate to aim at their vehicle.

"This is WORSE than bad!" Peach snapped. "You've got no fucking idea how bad!" She turned sharply, the kart sliding away and spitting up blue sparks as the tires scraped against the body. The cannonballs and Bullet Bills smashed into the sand where they just were, the airship still soaring close behind them and just a hundred yards above them.

"That's the koopa kids! From Mario World and stuff! You said they're the bosses, right?" Andy assumed.

"They're worse. Grab a mushroom."

"What?"

"Go in the bag! Grab a mushroom!" Peach demanded louder and angrier. Andy spun around to rifle through her pack. "A big one! But no. This isn't just the kids. That's Bowser's personal craft. It's bigger and better armed than the rest, and nobody, NOBODY goes onboard short of the Koopa Kings and their right hand minions."

"That's Bowser after us? THE Bowser?" Andy asked as she finally pulled out a slightly withered-looking but still orange-red mushroom.

"Shove it in the tailpipe!" Peach ordered. "And apparently, not."

"What do you mean?!" Andy shoved the overstuffed fungus into the pipe, oozing inside just before a gout of flame shot out of the rear of the car that made him jump back and bump into Peach's back. The kart suddenly doubled in speed, hurling him back towards the rear again as it rocketed ahead.

"We just saw a giant shell fall out of that ship! A giant, empty, DEAD shell! This means that Bowser's dead! This means the Koopa Kings have no one to back them up, and the scales are running out. This could be the end of their empire in the Mushroom Wastes!"

Somehow, Peach didn't sound thrilled about it. "So that's good, right?"

"So NOW we're their only witness to that fact!" Peach said with a wave of her gloved hand. "Even if we drop the shell shard, they're going to want us dead in the sand no matter what!"

"Oh..."

"Yea! Oh!" she snapped back, turning again to avoid another wave of canon fire. "We should be near the canyons... get me the map! I need to figure where we are!"

Andy dug into her bag again and produced the map. "We're... uh... right at the south side of the Dry Dry Desert. Freezeezy Peak on the left, and the Kong Jungle on the right."

"What!?" Peach had to use her memory and landmarks, and was pretty good at it, but she couldn't have found that out that quickly. She turned to face him with a scowl on her goggled face. He pointed to a spot on the map; the spot where he saw a blinking yellow dot, but Peach saw nothing but his finger.

"It's lit up. I just... can see it," Andy explained. Peach grabbed it and looked between the landscape and it.

"Son of a Sluggy," she muttered under her breath. Something about Player was not right, that was for sure. "Okay! We're going the wrong way, then!" she declared. Heading sharp West! Hit us with another booster 'shroom when we're steady!"

Peach swerved hard, spitting out more sparks as the kart strained with effort. Dull, angry shouts could be heard from overhead as they tried to turn their huge aircraft anywhere near as sharply.

"Where are we even going?" Andy asked, grabbing onto her again. His hand ended up on her chest again, but she wasn't in any mood to care.

"If we're lucky... we're making some enemies!" she called back over her shoulder. She spit off the edge of the cart and raced ahead. The airship had started to catch up to them right when there came a huge explosion overhead. Andy cowered in case it was another cannonball, but looking up, the airship was smoking with a fresh hole blown into it. The flying boat veered away from them, retreating enough that Andy heard the sound of more booming artillery fire from the opposite direction. He looked ahead again, seeing several tanks launching massive Bullet Bills (chuckling grimly all the way) and spiked balls at the airship.

"And that?" Andy asked.

"That'd be Boom Boom," Peach said with a wry smile. "He's got the guns and the paranoia to count on him to shoot down anything in his turf."

"Anything meaning us," Andy added.

"Well, yes... but something that's not flying and with guns bigger than we are."

"No, now it's on land with guns bigger than we are."

"Exactly. And I'm faster than anything on wheels." She swerved again, this time turning away from the incoming tanks. They were still moving quickly, gaining ground while Pink was busy accelerating again.

"BOOOOOM!" Andy heard the bellowing roar, looking back out of instinct rather than logic. A hulking, thick-toothed, almost gorilla-like reptile with a spikey shell pushed his way out of the top of one of the tanks, shaking his trash-can sized fists in the air.

"I think he's mad!" Andy shouted.

"He's always mad! It changes nothing!" She floored it as the bellowing Boom Boom raised his fists and eyed up a large control panel in front of him. Andy couldn't quite see it, but somehow he felt like he could see over the giant monster's shoulder. The vision craned like a camera to show that he only had two buttons on his controls: one labeled "Boom" and one labeled "BOOM!" The psychotic lizard grinned and started bashing his fists onto the panel, one after another. "BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!" it chanted, raiding shells the size of dumpsters into the sand around them.

"Kid! Hey, Player!" Peach shouted over the ringing in his ears. "Can you drive!?"

"What?! No!"

"Dammit! Alright, get the bag again. Look for a flower!" She beat a fist on the steering wheel as what looked like a caricature of a military jeep rolled up alongside them. Several grease and dirt-smeared Koopa Troopas, clung to it, brandishing makeshift blades and crude hand cannons aimed at them. A Dry Bones drove the jeep itself, cackling shrilly as its skull bounced around on its neck hole. This was definitely going in Andy's nightmares, if not one of those creepy nostalgia websites he went to.

One of the troopas leapt from their vehicle onto the kart, his thick boots landing just over the edge of the seating. He didn't seem to mind the incoming shells from his allied tanks, nor did they seem to care that he was standing on their target. He raised what looked like a piece of shrapnel tied to a wooden handle, grinning cruelly down at Andy before bringing the weapon down. Peach turned in time to block it with her boomerang, giving a loud clang near Andy's ears before she rather flexibly swung a booted foot into its stomach. The Troopa screamed briefly, crashing into the sand before pulling into his shell and rolling back into the mayhem of the tanks. Peach didn't give him a second thought as she flung the boomerang at the jeep, the blade slicing neatly through the base of the Dry Bones' skull. Its head bounced off, its cackling turning into confusing shouts as the rest of its body struggled to steer when its eyes were falling off the back of their car. They spun out and crashed over the next dune while Peach pulled ahead.

"Player! Getting that flower or what!?" she demanded, as if the last few death-defying moments had never happened. Andy nodded and grabbed it, another wilting red and yellow blossom with weary eyes looking back at him.

"Yea... got it!"

"Good! It should have a few charges left in it. Aim the tip at where you want it to go, then squeeze the leaves! Aim for the drivers, because the armor and treads are too thick for something that little!"

Andy nodded and did as he was told, fumbling with the classic item a few times before it pointed the way he wanted. The limp and wobbling flower wasn't especially reliable, but he finally held the base of the petals to steady it and squeezed. The flower gave off a shrieking noise like an especially huge firework going off and spat a fireball the size of a minivan behind them.

The tanks tried to veer out of the way, but they clearly weren't built for the best mobility. One was melted down to slag while the two next to it were scorched enough to spin out of control. The one side had its treads melt off and crash over sideways, the other merely splashed with flames until Boom Boom jumped out of his vehicle, roaring and stomping as he tried to slap the fires out across his body. All the while, little numbers flashed across his vision: “100 pts! 200 pts! 250 pts!”

"Wow... I didn't think these things were THAT powerful," Andy noted. The rest of the tanks had quit their pursuit, whether to help out their Boss or to figure out what the hell just happened.

"They aren't!" Peach shouted in a mix of shock and delight. "The HELL did you just do!?"

"I did what you said! I just used the power-up!"

"You should have roasted one, maybe two guys in a shot! Not an entire tank! Nobody can do that! There's not enough magic left in those things!" Andy looked back at her blankly as she slowed enough to look back at him, shaking her head slowly. "What in the hell are you, Player?"

"Here we go. Welcome to my little palace." Peach gestured around the cave at the end of the narrow canyon, tight enough that it took some precise positioning to get the koopa shell down it, not with a dull-colored tarp thrown over it rather than try to fit it inside her cave. It looked... very unmagical. A cooking pot over a doused fire, a few sleeping bags thrown out in one corner, a similarly dull pink motorcycle against one wall. There were a few crates of supplies and a large jug placed underneath a stalactite to catch the slow drip of water.

Peach was quick to sort the water into a few canteens, drinking from one before passing it off to Andy. After all the yelling and driving through the dry landscape, he was quick to gulp it down. "Help yourself," Peach sighed, flopping her arms around her. "Ain't much. Mostly kart parts and trade goods, so... hope you like mushrooms."

She started to work on her kart while Andy eyed up one of the plump, wrinkled mushrooms from her stash. He was hungry enough to try it after all that action, so he popped it into his mouth. "Not bad. Filling."

Peach suddenly stopped working on her cart. "...are you serious?"

"Yea. I ate one and I'm good. Why?"

"It takes five of those to make lunch for me." She smirked and tossed her screwdriver aside, striding up to him. "I don't know rightly what you are... but it sounds like items work about ten times as hard for you as it does for the rest of us."

"Oh." Andy paused for a moment and then shrugged. "Sorry?"

For the first time since they met, Peach laughed, running a hand through her hair. "Don't be. It's a useful power to have. More than I've got going for me right now." The retired royalty sat on the crate next to Andy. "I don't know what brought you here, Player, but you're something special. A real treasure."

Andy smiled at her, blushing from her flattery. "Thanks... you're uh... great too." He looked over her tight figure. She had stripped out of her jumpsuit when they were safely inside her hideout, now just in loose-fitting pants and a tank top. The chesty princess clearly wore no bra from how her bosom bounced, and she was clearly no delicate lady to be rescued. Her bared arms were muscular, and abs lined the bare skin that led down into the waistline of her pants. Scars and bruises dotted her skin in various areas, showing him what this new Mario world had done to her.

"It's a rough place out there," she noted, as if reading his mind. "It's good to meet someone who's not so bad... like things used to be." She put a strong arm around his shoulders, squeezing him closer to her until he felt the warmth coming off of Peach, and her him.

Andy had to feel bad for her. He'd always had something of a crush on her growing up, though he had been in the generation where at least she was in 3D. He had to wonder what he was doing here, and if this was somehow his fault. Had his playing the game made this happen? Why was he able to use the items like this? What else could he see that they couldn't? He felt guilty about it all, and wanted some way to make things better for her.

Peach seemed to have that under control as she touched his cheek lightly and turned his head, kissing him full on the mouth. The quiet cave carried nothing but the faint drip of Peach's water supply and their working mouths. Andy was... inexperienced, to say the least, but Peach guided him with her hands and mouth. She rubbed her tongue against his, her larger organ flexing and gyrating to encourage his along. Andy followed her lead for the most part, getting occasional bursts of daring to press his tongue in deeper or suck lightly on her lips. She seemed to appreciate those actions the most, based on her moans and heavy breathing.

Peach took him by the hand, roughly pulling it up to grab her breast without opening her eyes. Andy himself couldn't help but stare; the fierce and strong but twisted remnant of his childish crush was in front of him, making aggressive advances on him. It felt like he was making out with his babysitter, a celebrity, and the school bully all at once. She had his full attention.

He squeezed her breasts awkwardly, but with steady progress. He found that kneading them slowly, lightly lifting them before giving them a firm grasp got the strongest reactions out of her. Peach pulled the shorter boy into her lap, making it even easier for him to reach her as he felt her nipples grow hard and firm beneath his attentive fingers. With another burst of courage, he brought himself to pinch two fingers lightly around both of her tender tips.

Peach gave a husky grunt at that, finally parting her lips from his to take in a few deep, hot breaths as if she was exhausted from this rather than their high-speed chase. She still smelled of the gunpowder, sand and engine parts, and it somehow only encouraged the boy's erection.

Peach worked quickly from there, removing her shirt and going to his while she leaned back into his hands. Not content with that when he saw the bouncy, perky breasts held up by her powerful chest muscles, Andy leaned in to kiss along one before latching her lips onto the nipple and sucking on it.

"Ohhh fuck yes!" Peach gasped, throwing her head back as her blonde hair shook out more sand onto the crate beneath them. She grabbed his head, squeezing him and pulling at his hair. Andy almost pulled away, fearing he'd done something wrong, but she was holding onto him to keep him closer. "I needed this!" She didn't go so far as to say it, but Andy picked up the implication anyway. She had been lonely before this. Now her hideout was full of noisy passion.

Peach didn't seem to want to waste any more time. She lost her pants in a hurry, and if she either hadn't expected company or had given up shaving her pubic hair a long time ago, leaving it to grow into a dense blonde bush. She dropped to her knees, kissing over his smooth chest and undoing his jeans at an aggressive pace. When his erection appreciatively felt the open air, the naked blonde stuffed it right into her mouth. She bobbed her head a few times, Andy gripping the crate and giving a soft but passionate shout as he tried to contain himself.

Peach gave him a mixed blessing as she removed her mouth and climbed back onto the crate, laying on her back in front of him. "Not yet," she insisted. "Get on." Andy crawled over on top of her, the horny blonde thankfully taking his hips to adjust his position. She had apparently picked up on the idea that he was a virgin, and was working to accommodate him as much as herself. She adjusted his smaller body to rest between her legs, sliding his shaft into her slit through her cushioning bush. It tickled at his own privates, but it was easily overpowered by the wet warmth of entering the dethroned princess. He had to stay thrust inside her for several long, wonderful seconds before she had to gently urge him back out, holding his hips and rolling hers to develop their rhythm. Her strong body shifted under his, easily controlling and guiding him along the path inside her. He felt her muscles tense and her breathing go especially deep when he hit things just right, feeling the gentle nudge of her clitoris against his tip when he pushed to his full length inside. She kept herself under control for the most part, but her breathing steadily grew deeper and more rapid. Her pussy clenched around him, twitching with an excitement of her own that was enough to make Andy lose any semblance of control. He gave a quick passionate cry as he came inside her, falling on top of her wearily and clinging to her soft but sturdy  breasts. 

Andy’s body kept moving only by virtue of Peach’s continued humping bouncing him on top of her, refusing to quit after his own orgasm. A few more strokes and her body shook intensely, her muscles tightening against his skin as she gripped him tighter and pulled him in deeper still. She squeezed her arms around him to hug him tighter, grasping his head and pushing him against her breast as she let out a single stammering cry, as if a sudden break in her practice of staying silent within her cave. Andy’s sensitive prick felt the wash of her warm cum spread over his, the sweaty princess keeping him in her grasp and buried deep inside of her.

“Yea,” Peach panted, holding him a bit longer before she carefully slid Andy out of her cum-soaked pussy. “I really needed that.”

"That's one hell of a mini-game," Andy panted, smiling back at her wearily. “Not exactly E for everyone…”

"You and your fuckin' games," Peach teased, grinning as she smacked him on the arm. She sighed contently and leaned back, looking out through the distant hole in the roof of the cave. "What the hell are we gonna do with this anyway?"

“Do it again?” Andy offered.

“I mean the stuff. We can’t hold onto that shell for long before they come sniffing around after us.”

"Oh.” Andy took a moment to realize just how little he knew about the world he was in, at least as it was now. “What do you think?"

"We could make some gear, but I don't have the skill for that. We'd need a crafter for that. Maybe tank up the kart or get some armor. Probably a guys down in Rose Town if we want to do this quick and sloppy… shut up. You know what I mean.

"We could always sell it, of course. People would pay out their pipes for this kind of material, but it'll be hot. They won't want to be caught with it either. That means going to some shady types. Wario would do anything for some cash, and he's got no real allegiance to the Koopas besides bribing his way to safety. We’d just have to take the drive over to his stadium.

“There’s also the Kongs. They’re not exactly bright or friendly, but if there’s some place where the Koopas will have trouble finding us anywhere, it’s there.

“Or we can go up to the Grubba’s Smash Arena. It’s kind of by Yoshi territory, but we can hope there’s somebody by the coliseum desperate enough for weapons to buy it.”

Peach remained quiet for a long stretch, and Andy realized she was waiting on his decision. He looked up at her expectantly, and she continued to stare back. He wasn’t exactly sure what was happening, but he felt certain about one thing: he was inside a video game.