Demesne 411 - Shana, We Need To Talk (Patreon)

Shana should have known this was going to happen. After all, the stated—and according to Binder Lolilyuri, only—reason the children had been taken to Lorian Demesne was so that they would be safer from dragons and to relieve the strain on River's Fork Demesne food supplies. She had been working with Wizard Lidzuga to specifically change that situation as she had imbued all of the meanings that he placed on crops and trees. With multiple harvests of grain, and more intended to come over the fading end of summer and the coming autumn, her once-demesne would have more than enough grain when winter arrived.

So of course that the children that had been in her care would be sent back now that there was enough to eat.

She should have known that this was going to happen, that the children would eventually have to leave, and she would be all—

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Her left arm rose and slapped her cheek hard, picking up her flow of thought where it had fallen, and she stared at her own hand in surprise. That… was new. Was the thought of the children leaving her care really so overwhelming? No, she hadn't gone '… … …' yet from simply thinking of the subject, and it had only occurred during the second iteration of the thought, so it must have been something else related to the subject.

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She would examine the flow of thought to understand what had caused it to break later. She was a Dungeon Binder, even if she was a failed one. A Dungeon Binder could not be distracted or hindered from performing their duties. The difficulties she was experiencing didn’t matter, only the fulfillment of her work. That meant that she needed to prepare the children to go back to River’s Fork to their fa—

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Her left arm rose and slapped her cheek hard, and she picked up her flow of thought where it had fallen. She needed to go inform the children to prepare to go back to their homes in River’s Fork.

First, however, she needed to apologize to Lord Rian for simply running off while he was speaking to her.

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Her announcement that they would be returning to River's Fork permanently was met with excitement and it took some effort to get the children to all settle down enough that they wouldn't be disturbing the surrounding tables too badly. Fortunately, the other tables did not seem too bothered. Those who heard her informing the children seemed approving and congratulating the children on finally being able to go home—

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Shana found herself coming back to her senses as the disruptive emotions receded. "Thank you, Yoshka," she said as her little cousin's hand mashed her cheek. As much as she'd gotten used to rousing herself by slapping her cheek, Yoshka's method was much gentler. Even with how her cousin liked to play with her face afterwards—the way Yoshka was doing now, rubbing Shana'a face in little circles—she still preferred it. She sat patiently as her cousin played with her face and pulled up the corners of her mouth.

"There! Now you're smiling, Shasha!" Yoshka said gleefully.

"I don't think it counts when it's because you're holding my face, Yoshka," Shana said, and indeed, when the hands holding her mouth in place were removed, her expression returned to its usual smooth expression.

Her cousin ignored her. "We're really going home, Shasha?"

"Yes, Yoshka, you're going home," Shana repeated patiently.

"For how long?"

Shana stared at her cousin for a moment, before she understood the question. "This isn't going to be just a visit, Yoshka," Shana clarified. "Everyone is going back home to stay."

"Really?"

"Really."

"Really-really?"

"Really-really?"

"Really-really-really?"

"Yes, Yoshka, really."

"So we'll be living with tota and tyatya and Verik aga—"

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"—asha? Shasha?"

Shana came back to her senses again with Yoshka's hand on her cheek. She swiftly picked up her flow of thought where it had fallen. "Sorry, Yoshka. Yes, you will be living with them again back in River's Fork."

"Really?"

"Yes, really," Shana said., making a show of looking towards the kitchen. "Oh, look, the food is ready." She turned back to the table. "Koyan, Kayas, get everyone ready to get food."

Between her and the two sisters, they were able to get the children settled down enough to not cause more than the usual commotion in the lines to get food. Thankfully, once all the children had food in their hands they became occupied with eating, although they remained excited.

After dinner, the children who hadn't taken a bath before dinner—which was nearly all of them—were taken to correct that deficiency, the clothes they were wearing soaked and wrung to get out the day's sweat while they changed into another set. Tomorrow, they would need to give everyone's clothes a proper washing with soap, so that they would at least be returning home in relatively clean clothes. Shana would not let it be said she had been deficient in caring for her charges.

After the bath, Shana and the two weavers herded the children back to her house so they could start getting ready to sleep. In addition to the few bedrolls some of the children had brought with them, they also had a large mat made from dried stems of ropeweed that Koyan and Kayas had woven. While the mat was thin, it was a layer between the sleepers and the stone floor, and the various blankets laid atop it provided sufficient cushioning.

Once the bedding was laid out, it was only a matter of waiting for the children to get sleepy enough to finally settle down and go to sleep. During this time, Shana sat at the table that the Great Binder had made for her and compiled the reports she had been given that day as part of her duties of keeping track of the demesne's foods and material inventory. While she had been not been very well-practiced when she had first made her agreement with Binder Lolilyuri the previous year, Shana had since had several opportunities to practicing her writing skills. Her letters were legible, if blocky and childish, though her numbers were more refined. She had far more opportunity to practice writing numbers, after all.

Now she was one of the few people in the demesne with a pen—or at least, a pen not made from a beast feather—and paper to help her keep records. She had practiced using the pen, gently 'writing' on a scrap of leather to make subtle lines barely visible even under bright sunlight, before she had dared using it with ink. Now after weeks of writing with it, she was far more confident in her handwriting. Using the pen, it was also far easier to write using small characters, which allowed her to make optimum use of the sheets of paper.

It could be said that no one knew the current state of Lorian Demesne better than her. The total amount of meat they had stored in the cold rooms, the fat they had available to turn into soap, the total number of barrels of grain they had, the amount of tubers they had stored as well as other food stuffs… while a few people in the demesne might know how much they had of one or two things they had in storage, Shana knew exactly how much they had at the end of most days, and it was part of her duties to inform Lord Rian of this inventory.

Shana worked as the children tired themselves out, although she had looked up and greeted Karina and other guests when they had come over to take advantage of the bound tool that Binder Lolilyuri had given them. In the confines of her house, the constant refreshing breeze that the bound tool generated was a wonderful luxury that drew no end of visitors with an excuse to stay the night, the blankets and bedrolls that they brought with them providing added cushioning against the cold stone floor. The other children of the demesne came and went as they pleased, and while not everyone stayed the night—even her most frequent guest Karina only stayed over every other night—they all had a standing invitation to do so, should they desire.

By the time Shana had finished with the updates to the day's inventory, most of the children had settled down and several were curled up on the mat and bedrolls. Koyan had already settled onto the bed, a dozing Yoshka curled up next to her, while Kayas lay on her bedroll on the floor, surrounded by Febe, Adgwyne, Phami and Tazel, who were all curled up around her, pressed against her sides. Shana placed the stone that glowed with lightwisps inside her bath bucket, arranging her towel to limit how much light shone of the ceiling. Once it was to her satisfaction, she finally lay down on her bed, curling up next to her little cousin.

“Shasha…” Yoshka said sleepily, one eye only half-opening. “Goo’ nigh’…”

Shana gently kissed her forehead. “Good night, Yoshka. You’ll be home soon…”

She began to hum the tune of a marching song that she remembered hearing sung among the militia. Without all the colorful language, references to bellringing, and the promises of bloody violence, and hummed at a slower tempo, the tune was almost appropriate for lulling her cousin to sleep. It was one of the few songs she could use, because most of the rest had been hummed to her by—

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Shana left the comforting darkness of empty, thoughtless sleep, and everything hurt all over again. Tota was dead. Tyatya was dead. Yoshka was leaving to live in River’s Fork again, and Shana was going to be left all alone again…!

She lay curled up in bed, unable to fight back tears as she shook. Next to her, Yoshka slept deeply, her elbow partially pressed against Shana’s stomach. She couldn’t lose her! She couldn’t lose Yoshka! She couldn’t…!

Sobbing quietly, Shana curled up in the crowded bed, trying to stifle her voice to not wake anyone, trying to deny the world, deny her pain, deny herself…

Abruptly, the sobbing stopped.

Slowly, carefully, Shana sat up. Face smooth, she fastidiously dabbed at the tears on her face. Turning carefully, she slipped her tsinelas on to her feet and stood up quietly. Walking over to the partially covered bucket, she drew out the radiant stone that Binder Lolilyuri had given her. With quiet steps, Shana skirted to edges of the room to avoid all the children still asleep, moving until she reached the door. Opening it carefully, she slipped outside.

The light of the red moon was alone in the sky, bathing the world with the color of blood. It was still far into the middle of the night, and dawn was still hours away, leaving the demesne empty, everyone still in the homes. Bugs flitted back and forth, and out of the corner of her eye she saw little beasts scurrying.

Shana walked purposefully towards the second bath house, which were on the other side of the row of houses across from hers. The doors into the baths were closed but not barred, and Shana slipped into the women’s baths, closing the door behind her. Inside, the space was dark, the bound tool that provided light from the ceiling deactivated for now. Entering the antechamber with its shelves for everyone’s clothes, Shana merely slipped off her tsinelas, padding across the stone floor on bare feet. The main bathing chamber was empty, the soaking pools drained of water, although the central basin was still full of water in case there were any late-night bathers, or water was needed for any reason.

The stone in her hands lighting the way, Shana walked carefully towards the central basin. Kneeling down beside the basin, she leaned forward until she could see her reflection. The darkness of the baths and the light in her hands bathed her face in light, and her reflection was vivid on the water.

For a moment, she stared down into the eyes of her reflection.

“Shana,” she said softly, “we need to talk.”