(Morcster Chef) An Orc Chef?? - Ch. 3 (Patreon)

Belmont’s eyes widened. His mouth fell open in a near perfect ‘o’ shape.

“It can talk!” He breathed, as if he were in the presence of the worlds most revolting miracle.

“It doesn’t enjoy being referred to as an object,” Arek said.

Belmont ignored the orc, spinning to look back at Ming. He thrust a finger in Arek’s direction.

“Ming? How did you teach a monster to talk?” Belmont asked, his sword flicking back and forth like an irate dog’s tail.

“She didn’t teach me how to do anything,” Arek rumbled. “But it looks like nobody ever taught you manners.”

“Oh, he hit the nail on the head,” Ming said, bursting into laughter.

Belmont snarled, storming towards Arek and raising his weapon. Ming flicked a finger towards him. A heavy gust of wind picked the man up and launched him through the flaps of one of the huge tents. He cursed the entire way in, the warrior’s voice growing muffled as the cloth enveloped him. Ming didn’t stop laughing the entire time.

Belmont stormed out from the tent. His lips pulled back in a vicious snarl as he stalked towards the two of them. He held his sword in a white knuckled hand, and looked as if he wanted nothing more than to chop his own teammate in half.

“What’s going on out here?” A delicate voice called.

Belmont froze in his tracks. A thin woman wearing what appeared to be dozens of silk scarves emerged from one of the tents. Her skin was light grey and her eyes just slightly purple. Her gait was so smooth that she practically glode across the floor, arriving between the heavily armored man and Arek.

“Hi, Malissa!” Ming chirped. “I hired a chef since Belmont’s cooking was trying to claw its way back out of my stomach.”

Malissa shimmered towards Arek, stopping several feet away from the orc and raising a delicate eyebrow.

“An orc chef?” She asked, giving Arek an amused grin. “Well, I can’t imagine you hired him without making sure he knew how to cook.”

“Are you implying an orc would be able to cook better than I can?” Belmont spat, his knuckles turning white as he clenched his hands.

“I could fish around in the latrine and find something better than half the stuff you’ve made,” Ming grumbled.

“That’s it!” Belmont yelled, diving at Ming.

The small girl let out a laugh and danced out of the way. Malissa

Arek glanced away from the squabbling party. There were four tents, but just three people. He tilted his head slightly.

“Where’s number four?” the orc asked. Belmont froze mid punch and Malissa sent a sharp look at Arek. Even Ming paused.

“Asleep,” Malissa said.

“We don’t have a number four,” Ming said at the exact same time.

This time, both Belmont and Malissa shot a glare at their teammate.

“Shut up!” They both hissed.

“I was under the impression that adventurer teams were required to have at least four people in the interest of safety,” Arek said.

“Now look what you’ve done,” Belmont hissed to Ming.

“It doesn’t matter. He’s working for us, so he isn’t going to tell anyone,” Ming said, stomping a foot and pouting.

“Hey, I don’t care. I’m just here to cook,” Arek said, shrugging when the other two party members turned back towards him. “But, if there are just three of you and four tents, I suppose I’ll be taking the spare.”

“Absolutely not,” Belmont spat. “First off, I haven’t approved of hiring you. Second, those tents are for members of the party with a share.”

“Oh, fantastic,” Arek said, striding past the man and poking his head into the nearest tent. It was the least decorated of the lot, being made of plain white cloth and nothing else. As he had guessed, the tent was completely empty aside from a bedroll. “I’ve got a share, so this one can be mine.”

Belmont’s face shifted to multiple different shades of purple and red when Ming nodded, confirming Arek’s words. His lips pursed and his eyes bulged comically.

“You might want to do something about your friend, though. I think he’s turning into a tomato,” Arek observed.

“You gave him a share?” Belmont screamed. “Why would you give a chef an entire share?”

Malissa didn’t look particularly pleased either. She shook her head and let out a sigh that turned into a laugh.

“Give it up, Belmont. Ming wouldn’t have done something so foolish without having a reason. Right?” Malissa asked. Her words had a sharp undertone to them.

“Of course not,” Ming snapped. “He’s the best chef in the world.”

“Damn straight,” Arek agreed.

“And you know this…how? On his word?” Malissa asked. Arek thought he might have spotted her eye twitch slightly.

“You’ll know it too once he makes food for us. Then you’ll be begging him to stay. Just don’t forget that he’s MY chef. I’m giving him one of my shares, so he’s only obligated to cook for me.”

“And anyone else that I want to cook for,” Arek rumbled, his gaze narrowing slightly.

“And anyone you want to cook for,” Ming agreed. “But you should probably make something now. Quickly, please. Before Malissa tries to kill me again.”

Arek restrained his curiosity and didn’t ask about the ‘again’ at the end of Ming’s sentence.

“What ingredients do you have? I only have spices on me at the moment,” Arek said.

“Tomatoes, several potatoes, some old pasta, a loaf of bread, cheese, and Malissa has some yogurt hidden in her Bag of Colding.”

“Hey! How do you know about that?” Malissa asked, glaring at Ming as her hand lowered to a white pouch at her waist that Arek hadn’t paid any attention to before.

“I saw you sneak a bite of it after you dumped Belmont’s burnt chicken in the latrine pit yesterday,” Ming said, smirking. She turned back to Arek. “So? Can you make something?”

“I can,” Arek said, drumming his fingers on his chin thoughtfully. “It’s a simple recipe, but it hasn’t failed me yet. I need you to bring me the tomatoes, bread, cheese, and Malissa’s yogurt.”

Malissa took a step back as Ming approached her with a dangerous look in her eyes.

“Don’t even think about it, you little goblin. This is my yogurt.”

A grin crossed Ming’s face. She reached into the cloth pack on her back. Belmont’s eyes widened and he dashed away from them, diving behind the tent beside Arek.

Ming pulled a wooden staff free of the bundle. Malissa lunged towards the smaller woman, her silken robes snapping around her like a flurry of knives. The small girl spun the staff in her hand and drew in a deep breath. The world vanished in a pillar of white light.