LARP Couples, Part 1 (Young Men to Fantasy Couples TFTG) (Patreon)

A new ongoing for our Premium Tier patrons!

By FoxFaceStories

A Commission for Matt

Harry and Lucas are nerdy friends on their way to a fantasy LARP when suddenly they are bullied by Kade and Rowan, their two regular tormentors. But when a witch overhears this bullying, she decides to take matters into her own hands and give the nerds everything they wanted. Soon the four are transported into a fantasy land that runs on LARP rules, where the nerds are the macho heroes and the bullies are now their submissive fantasy girlfriends!

Part 1: Inciting Incident

The pair were pretty proud of their costumes. Harry had dressed up as the classical hero knight in shining armour. He’d ordered the kit ages ago, and as the weeks had passed he’d grown increasingly nervous that it wouldn’t arrive in time for the Medieval LARP Fantasy Festival that was coming to town. It only came every two years, so it had been quite the nailbiter for a while, his excitement budding for the event but his own nervousness rising at the prospect of his costume ending up at the post office well after the event was over. Thankfully, he needn’t have worried: it arrived with days to spare, and it fit him perfectly. With some adjustments (the addition of a regal blue cape and a few feathers in the cap, as well as a tabard that displayed his made-up house crest), he was ready to go. The shining nature of the armour did make it gleam a little too much under the direct sunlight, making him wish he’d gone with his original plan to spray paint it black and instead go as a dark paladin of some description. Lucas had convinced him otherwise; Harry’s sandy blonde hair and bright eyes worked better in the ‘shining knight’ mode.

“I just wish the armour wasn’t so heavy,” he complained as he walked to the event.

Lucas just laughed. “That’s what you get for not working out enough.”

“Please, like you work out. You literally painted on your muscles.”

Lucas smirked, looking down at himself. He had wild black hair and a slightly tubby figure, though at least he wasn’t scrawny like his best friend. To that end, he’d decided to dress up as a fantasy orc for this celebration. The kind from Battle Hunters, not the Tolkien ones who were all kinds of ugly. He’d sprayed his skin a vibrant forest green and worked hard to stitch together a sort of barbarian battle shorts with a fake skirt of fur over the top. A couple of belts strapped over his shoulders, the only thing he was wearing on his torso, and from them his fake axes were positioned across his back. A fake hunting bird rested on his shoulder, looking a bit ridiculous. Of course, not being the tallest or toughest guy, Harry resisted the urge to call his friend an ‘accidental goblin.’ The belts were well made, at least, even if the rest wasn’t as convincing. The important thing was that Lucas was proud of his work, and therefore Harry was too.

The pair were absolute nerds, all things considered. They had grown up together, going through elementary school and then high school and now finally into the last of their college years, and all the while they had remained the best of friends and the geekiest of individuals. They absorbed fantasy, practically consumed it, having played Dungeons and Dragons many a time together, watched the extended editions of Lord of the Rings over and over on the same couch, and finally gotten into medieval LARPing when the festival began visiting their city several years ago. There was something about the call to adventure and the escape to fantastical worlds free of modern technology yet brimming with arcane magic that just engrossed them, though not always for the same reasons. Harry, for instance, loved the classic Tolkien-eque and Arthurian tales, albeit with modern twists; stories of brave knights rescuing equally brave princesses, the pairs travelling on adventures together. Sometimes he enjoyed tales of black knights instead; those more antiheroic and mysterious adventurers, wandering servants of justice with no lord to speak of, whose hearts could be captured by a suitable warrioress worthy of standing alongside him. Yes, it was fair to say he was a bit of a romantic in that regard.

Lucas, on the other hand, enjoyed the far more pulpy side of fantasy. Perhaps it was because he was less of an anxious individual than his friend, or simply because he’d managed to have even less success in dating (often because of his failed bravado and inability to hide his nerdiness), or some other reason, but his tastes in fantasy favoured musclebound orcs and scantily clad women, particularly of the non-human variety. He didn’t exactly shout it to the rooftops, but one could easily tell there were some fetishistic elements to it; he had posters of sexy elven women and orc-girls in his room, alongside other ‘fantasy babes.’ Which wasn’t to say he didn’t like stories of good triumphing over evil, but he liked it when it was antiheroic and, well, more than a little sexy. High fantasy involving tons of different races and crazy adventure with an adventuring party were his favourite, and he had gotten Harry into playing many online games and tabletop campaigns as a result. He didn’t regret it one bit, and frankly neither did Harry, who simply found his friend’s eccentricities amusing.

It was with these attitudes that their costumes had been fashioned - one the stalwart knight, the other the barbarian orc - and for all that Harry felt a little nervous about being seen in his outfit and looking ridiculous, his friend’s easy swagger and obviously fake muscles made it easier to stomach. The LARP festival had just come into view, situated on the forest edge of town, the clearing having been hired by the organisers. It was far more bustling than last year, and already many others could be seen moving about in costume, setting up stalls, readying rides, attending to actual horses and displays and roleplay events. The day was set to be quite fun, and both young men had the schedules; they were particularly excited about the grand fantasy adventure promised by the organisers, with professional actors even hired for segments of it.

Well, they were excited, until they noticed the pair of obstacles blocking the path that led to the gate entrance.

“Oh shit,” Harry said. “It’s Kade and Rowan.”

“Ignore them,” Lucas said, though he was nervous, and suddenly was trying to make his slightly tubby figure look even smaller. 

“You know that never works.”

“Well, they’re in the way and they’ve spotted us, do you have a better idea, huh?”

He didn’t. Neither of them did, and they were only getting closer to the brawly pair who were awaiting them. 

Kade and Rowan were the worst of the worst; high school bullies who had never grown out of their behaviour, even as they had entered their early twenties. They were a match made in hell; Kade was tall, athletic and handsome, with black hair and an impressively square jaw. He had a gleaming intelligence to the way he set about tormenting those around him who were weaker, especially people like Harry, who he never called by his name, only by the insult ‘Twig.’ He had bullied the pair for quite some time, and never for any particular reason, and while they were more free of him after their high school years, whenever they encountered him on campus he was sure to make some snide comment, to undermine them in front of any women, and generally share anecdotes of all the embarrassments he’d put them through.

Rowan, on the other hand, was more of a bully for Lucas specifically. It was an understandable pairing. Whereas Kade was the brains of the outfit, the greater academic achiever with the privileged family and the ability to get out of any trouble, Rowan was the bruiser of the two. The lunkhead. The base bully who attached himself like a limpet to Kade’s side and followed his orders. It was a warped mirroring of the dynamic between Harry and Lucas: Harry was the high-achiever of the two, the one with greater prospects and better health, even if he was quite thin. And just like Lucas, who was a bit tubbier than his best friend, Rowan was a wide, broad, bull of a young man. Much of it was muscle, but one could tell that his future would include a large beer belly one day, and there was little doubt he would become a bouncer or security guard or something. That was especially evident from the way he liked pushing people around, shoving them out of the way, and generally hurling insults and getting up in their faces until they had no choice to fight back. That was when he beat them down. Lucas knew this from experience.

“I swear if he tries to throw hands I’m going to run,” Lucas said.

“He won’t try to throw hands. This isn’t high school anymore.”

“Yeah? Have you heard the stories coming out of bars and stuff? The guy is a maniac.”

“Kade will keep him in line,” Harry said, but when he turned back to look at Kade, he practically gulped. The tall, popular athlete had that gleam in his eye, the satisfied look of a bully who had just caught his target in the perfect crossfire.

“Well, well, well, if it isn’t the Twig,” he said aloud, half-chukling. Rowan chuckled with him. “Off to the nerd festival, I see, Twig?”

Harry decided not to ignore him. He knew from experience that this only made matters worse.

“It’s just a LARP festival, Kade,” he said, trying not to meet his eyes.

“A what? We just came out here to see the freaks! Isn’t that right, Rowan?”

“Sure is,” the other man said, giggling. “And what a pair of freaks I see. What are you supposed to be, Lucas, some kind of, like, fat goblin or something?”

Lucas would have blushed with embarrassment were he not wearing so much green skin paint. Well, he did blush, but it was less obvious.

“I’m an orc warrior,” he said, but even just saying it aloud made him realise it was the dumbest possible thing he could have said, because the pair of bullies exchanged a look of amusement between them. With a tilt of the head from Kade, Rowan gained permission to approach Rowan, circling him like a shark. The pair of nerds were getting nervous - the festival was literally within sight, and these bullies were ruining the experience for them.

“You don’t look like much of a warrior, ha!” Rowan exclaimed, shoving Lucas slightly to the side. He nearly toppled over. “Looks like a shit-green paintjob, in fact!”

“The armour’s better,” Kade said, and Harry was very wary of the compliment. “Looks a bit gay though, don’t you think? The feather, the shining armour. That rumour I spread about you two back in high school might end up going strong again if you parade around like a loser geek in a mardi gras dress, you know.”

Harry bit his lip. He’d hated those rumours. He just wanted to enjoy his fantasy roleplay. It would be starting soon, but the two tormentors were ruining it for him.

“Look Kade, we just want to go to the festival. Can you just let us pass by?”

Kade laughed. He practically cackled. “Not exactly the words of a brave knight, Twig. But then, you’re way too much of a pathetic twig to actually be a knight. No wonder you’re always off in these lame fantasies. No wonder the pair of you are still total virgins.”

“Virgins! Ha, still a pack of lame virgins!” Rowan added, unimaginative as always.

Lucas ground his teeth. He didn’t dare say anything. He was feeling totally humiliated, and knew that Rowan would bruise his arm if he tried to argue back. Both of them were trying to fight back tears at this point and feeling all the more pathetic for it. They were virgins, though Harry at least had some experience with a former girlfriend who had let him touch her boobs, but that’s as far as it had gotten. The truth was, whatever chances they’d ever had of meeting a pair of girls and having a good relationship had been destroyed by Kade and Rowan, who delighted in such mischief. Part of the reason to even go to the festival was knowing that there would be women with interests like them that they could meet. Well, that was the case for Harry. Lucas would probably ogle a bit too much, hopeless as he was.

It was at this point that Kade finally strode forward, looming over Harry, making him feel small in more ways than one. He didn’t employ violence - usually - but his presence always threatened it. He extended a single finger outwards and jabbed him in the chest. It ordinarily would have hurt, if not for the armour, but somehow that just made it feel more silly and childish.

“Hey, Twig, I just called you a virgin. Are you going to be the brave white knight who sticks up for yourself, or are you just gonna take it?”

Harry’s cheeks burned with anger and embarrassment. The same was true of Lucas, who indeed was looking like a sad, fat goblin at that point. But he could do nothing, he knew that.

“N-no, Kade, I’ll just take it, I guess,” he said.

“What about you, lard boy?” Rowan teased, despite being quite the bigger man himself. “Admit you’re a total virgin.”

Lucas was silent for a moment. He wanted to be literally anywhere else. “I’m . . . I’m a virgin,” he said, and it took every effort not to start crying then and there.

The two bigger men laughed and laughed, even sharing a high-five as they soaked in the humiliating scene they’d created.

“Can we go now?” Harry asked, daring to look up at Kade.

“Yeah, sure,” Kade said, sneering. “Go have your loser fun. Too bad you weren’t a tougher knight who could grow some balls. Think on that while you’re acting like a pair of fairies down there.”

Rowan giggled. “Good one, Kade!”

The two nerds went to move, but it was at this point that a fifth voice spoke up, a figure no one had known was there the whole time.

“No, I don’t think they should be going just yet, and neither should you two disgraces. Not until we’ve cleared something up.”

“What the-!?” Kade exclaimed, looking off the path and into the nearby bushes. Emerging from them was a woman in her mid-to-late twenties, wearing a dress that appeared medieval, with all sorts of trinkets and bones and leaves and twigs threaded throughout it, so that she looked like some ancient witch or druid. Around her head she wore a sort of tiara made of woven roots and reeds, with various flowers tied within it. Her features were almost fae-like, thin and striking and beautiful, and her hair was wreathed with plants and vines and even more flowers.

Kade laughed, and then, having gotten permission to do so from his master, so did Rowan. 

“Whoa, check out the crazy vegan chick. Were you perving on us the whole time, huh?”

“Not perving,” she said without a trace of humour. She stepped forward on beer, dirt-crusted feet. “I was simply drawn to this place. I enjoy these medieval festivals!”

“Sure, like there are actually girls at these things.”

“Women, thank you,” she replied, placing her hands on her hips. “And there are. Many of them, in fact, including those who dress up such as me. And we approach them with the same fun and enthusiasm I see in these men here with their wonderful costumes.”

Lucas awkwardly waved to her but Harry slapped his hand down. This was not the moment to try flirting with someone, especially when she was defending them instead of vice-versa.

“Wonderful?” Rowan asked. “Have you seen what this fat dork looks like? Do you need glasses?”

“I used to, but I solved that problem with a little magic. Easily so. It will take considerably more to fix your situation. Such horrid barbs and taunts you give, and for no cause. It is unforgivable.”

There was a brief pause. Something about this woman felt off, almost otherworldly. Beyond her ethereal beauty and immaculate costume, she seemed to radiate a certain . . . power. As if she were difficult to ignore, like something was redirecting them all to be unable to look away.

“Um, Kade, I don’t think you should push this lady,” Harry said.

“Shut up, Twig.”

“No, I think he’s right,” Lucas said, managing to show a bit more courage. “Um, I hope we didn’t offend you or anything, my lady.”

Even Harry had to raise an eyebrow about that. “My lady? Seriously? C’mon man,” he whispered. “You don’t have a chance.”

“Shut up,” Lucas whispered back, and the pair quickly lapsed back into silence as she regarded them.

“No offence taken,” she said casually. “In truth, I’m glad to see a shining knight and a barbarian orcs. Classic tropes in my opinion!”

“Yeah well, we don’t give two shits about crazy bitches from the forest who belong to the nerd crowd,” Kade said. “Even if you are pretty hot.”

“Hot but crazy, like a wild bitch,” Rowan added. 

At this point the strange woman stepped closer. Her face did not pinch in anger as Harry and Lucas expected. Instead, she simply looked up at the men with curiosity, regarding them as if they were alien creatures. Even Kade and Rowan recoiled a bit at this; there was indeed something off about this woman in a way that neither - especially dull Rowan - could quite quantify, and to their shared surprise they actually backed up a step.

“Hey, get away,” Kade said, trying to recover. “I don’t want to catch whatever weird freaky disease you probably contracted with all that forest shit on you.”

The woman actually smirked, though it was a faint expression. “Neither of you feel particularly bad at all for behaving this way, do you? Not one bit? Not even a little?”

The pair shared a look, then a laugh. The woman nodded as if that was an answer enough.

“And you two, Harry and Lucas, yes? They have been your tormentors for some time? Making fun of your LARP? Your fantasy interests? Your nerdery?”

“H-how did you know our names?” Harry said.

“The same way I know that this pair are Kade and Rowan . . . for now. The same way I am going to change your lives, and grant you a boon that will give you everything you ever wanted. And the same way I shall bane these two in turn, cursing them to adopt new forms and roles that will be much more pleasing to you. You see, I am a witch. My name is Saoirse, and I hate, hate, hate seeing bullying, especially when it overlaps with interests of mine like this.”

Kade scoffed. “Okay, this is weird shit. You three nerd virgins enjoy your -”

Saoirse clicked a finger, and suddenly Kade was silenced. Rowan gaped, went to move and shout something in turn, but another click saw him frozen to the spot, unable to move or talk. Only breathe and listen. It was a great improvement.

“Holy shit,” Lucas stammered. “You really are a witch, aren’t you?”

She smiled. “Oh, I very much am, even if your friend still doubts a little. Don’t worry Harry, I won’t take any offence. You see, I’m going to make your lives much, much better, all while making these two oafs regret their actions. You call these two nerds, huh? Well, Kade and Rowan, you better get used to joining the club, because you’re about to be these two nerds’ dates.”

The two frozen men managed to raise their eyebrows just a little. It was clear they were panicking, and maybe even starting to believe that magic was actually real. Saoirse waved her hand and there was a little pink flourish of arcane energy, and suddenly the bullying pair could speak again.

“Hey, what the fuck!? Let us go, you bitch!”

“Yeah, let us go!” Rowan said, before adding a simpering, “please!”

“Oh, I’ll let you go alright,” Saoirse said, turning to wink at a confused but fascinated Harry and Lucas. “Right after I get this transformation going. Trust me, you guys are going to love this LARP now, especially when you have two new hot dates on your arms! And fantasy-themed dates to boot! Let’s get this party started!”

She began waving her arms in a dancer-like fashion, speaking in an arcane tongue that none of them could decipher. Kade looked to be getting scared, and Rowan was absolutely terrified, now pleading helplessly for her to let them go, even throwing out apologies to Harry and Lucas.

“Too late!” the witch said, before returning to her arcane ritual chant. Harry briefly considered running away at this point, but Lucas was transfixed and refusing to budge, and if his usually-more anxious friend was sticking around, then so was he. Saoirse seemed to notice their decision not to run, and she gave them an encouraging smile, one that actually seemed to buoy the pair’s confidence.

“Don’t worry guys,” she said. “Trust me, you’re going to love this.”

And then, with Kade and Rowan still hurling a mix of obscenities, demands, and insults in the background, the witch drew a bubble of bubbling green light between her hands and expanded it. Like an atom bomb, it seared with energy before expanding rapidly. Harry and Rowan threw up their hands but were helpless before the magic. It quickly encased them all.

And that’s when the transformations began.

To Be Continued . . .