Writer’s Blog: May June Not Be Like May (Patreon)

The Saucy Sides and UCRT Fairy Tales will come out tomorrow, with the final third of Gil’s interview released on Tuesday. All are over half written, and I just need to tie the bow and end the stories. Full disclosure: my focus has been all over the place recently. Partially because of real life worries and scheduling, but also because I’m adjusting to no longer living on my own. Thankfully, my mom is fantastic and understanding and schedules outings with her friends so that I can have the house to myself to write undisturbed. Other times, I squat at our neighbor's.

(In other news, the Saucy Side is now pirate themed as well, with the Regency piece pushed back to June. I just . . . kind of kept writing after finishing this month’s short story, and am currently contemplating whether or not Captain Nick deserves a saucy snippet as well.)

My mother begins chemo mid-June, and I should be more or less all moved in by then as well. I’ve already begun settling into routine, and thus hope to get out the rewrite of Chapters 8-12, as the only chapter I feel requires a major facelift in that grouping is Chapter 12 (I’m completely overhauling the various “dates” Button can have with the ROs). Editing has taken way longer than I anticipated, even given recent derailments, but I’m trying to not beat myself up over the slower pace and instead remind myself that each edited chapter equates to the length of a novella.

My new goal is to submit Mind Blind to Hosted Games by fall. It’s a deadline I should have no trouble making given that over half the endings are already written. Still much latter than I wanted, but better a few months late than releasing things rushed and half-baked. (Allow me a moment to laugh at the version of myself that thought writing my first IF could be completed in a single year.)

I do feel confident that future projects won’t take nearly this long. There’s a lot of things I wish that I’d done differently when I first started coding Mind Blind, and I’ve definitely learned from the experience. I may even code a rough version of Delivery’s ending first, so that I know all the stats with which I’ll be working. 

Truth be told, I’m really feeling DONE with editing (your guys’ feedback is the only thing that makes the process manageable, as otherwise I’d dissolve into a soggy mush of indecision).  All that being said: if I become utterly desperate for a break, I may take a week to polish up one of the ending routes and pre-release it on Patreon as a text document. The endings won’t be playable until the whole demo is recoded, but that’s no reason not to share Nick’s complete and utter dismay with versions of his siblings who lock lips with Rosy.

EDIT: 

I originally didn't include this part, because I'm trying not to limit the amount of moroseness that I bludgeon you guys over the head with. But, seriously, I NEED to say thank you to everyone who's made it possible for me to work on Mind Blind. I've almost burnt out multiple times (writing that many words is just, well, hard), but knowing that Mind Blind has an audience and that people are eagerly waiting for the final product . . . it's been more empowering than words can describe, and has kept me going even on the toughest days.

These past two months have been some of the hardest--if not the hardest--in my entire life. My mom is everything to me. I can't imagine a world without her in it, but I'm being forced to contemplate that possibility way sooner than I ever anticipated. Her odds are good, but I still hate the gambling. If it weren't for the flexibility that Patreon's allowed me, Mind Blind probably would've been shelved after her cancer diagnosis. I simply wouldn't have been able to keep writing on top of everything else if I was also teaching fulltime. 

. . . I'm tearing up right now, so I'm going to stop. (Again, I'm really sorry for being so melancholy! My posts going forward will be more upbeat, I promise. Because, logically, I know things will likely be fine and I'm in that optimistic headspace 99% of the time, and not Mopey McSadGirl that I'm projecting tonight.) But please know that I am incredibly grateful that you've all decided to support Mind Blind. Despite recent hardships, you've made my life better than I ever imagined it could be.

When Mind Blind finally releases, it'll only be because you helped me through the journey.